Soulswap

by Arizona Tape

  “Oh, so it really is the same birthday as Ayra?”

  I nodded, somehow, not surprised. us having the same birthday was probably the least strange occurrence between the two of us. i still wondered what the fuck made us swap bodies, but hey, I couldn’t complain. It had lead me to meet Sian. And anything that brought me to her was a good thing, really.

  “And you’re also turning twenty-five, right?”

  “Yes.”

  “Interesting.”

  I tilted my head. “Is that so?”

  “Yes. I don’t know what the dragon age of maturity is, but for vampires, it’s twenty-five.”

  “Oh, it’s the same for dragons.”

  Sian nodded, suddenly looking a little nervous.

  “What?”

  “Nothing.”

  I brushed a stray lock of hair from her face. I might not have known her for a long time, but I could tell, something was troubling her mind.

  “You can tell me, Sian.”

  She closed her eyes and gingerly pressed her forehead against mine. Not unlike Devon used to do.

  Huh. I always thought it was something about him, but maybe I was just the type of girl people liked to press their foreheads against?

  “Ayra doesn’t drink blood.”

  “I know?”

  “But your body... This body, it needs blood. And it needs to get used to a regular, healthy intake before you turn twenty-five.”

  “So the clock is ticking over here as well,” I murmured, thinking out loud.

  “What?”

  “Oh, nothing. Just that twenty-five seems to be an important number.”

  The blonde on top of me shifted her body a little, and felt myself reacting to where her bare skin slid across mine. Damn, I never had a reaction like that with Devon. Sure, I didn’t mind him touching me, but it never actually excited me. Not in the way as Sian was right now.

  I wanted to brush my fingertips over her skin, just to feel her. Or kiss my way down her neck, so I could take in her scent. Touch every inch of her skin so I could make myself familiar with everything and anything that she was.

  Which sounded a bit obsessive. But I couldn’t help it. I wanted to know her so bad, it made me ache.

  Wow, was this how it was supposed to feel? Why did nobody ever describe it for me? And how did I ever believe I had that with Devon?

  “Earth to Tate?” Sian hummed, waving a hand in front of my face.

  “Oops, sorry. I was daydreaming.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “About?”

  I chewed my lip, contemplating whether I should or shouldn’t tell her. “You?” I replied hesitantly, nerves shooting through my system. What if that was the wrong answer?

  The smug grin breaking through on her face, lifted my worries. She clearly liked that answer, she liked it a lot.

  “Oh, Ayra.”

  What.

  A look of pure panic shot across her face. “Fuck. Tate. I mean, Tate.”

  “Did you just call me Ayra?”

  “I... It just slipped out. I’m so sorry, it must be habit.”

  I clenched my jaw and averted my eyes from hers. Well, that was just peachy. Here I was thinking about her and being with her, and she was confusing me for her ex. How dandy. How fucking dandy.

  “Tate, I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking about her. I really wasn’t, but we’ve been together for four years and—”

  “Yeah, I get it,” I shrugged, trying to act casual. I pushed her off of me and hid my discomfort in a cough. Or maybe I revealed it.

  “Shit, I feel awful.”

  “Yeah, you’re not the only one,” I muttered, running my hands through my hair. Well, not my hair. Ayra’s hair. Damn it. What if I took myself to the hairdresser’s and gave us an ugly haircut? Would that help with Sian not calling me Ayra? Maybe I should get a tattoo and stamp my name on her forehead. Although that probably wouldn’t go down too well.

  No, it was immature and childish to take it out on Ayra’s body. It wasn’t her fault we looked alike. You needed two people to look similar and one of those two people, was me. Or my body. Or whatever. How fucking confusing.

  “Tate, I promise you... I wasn’t thinking about Ayra. It just slipped out and I’m horrified.”

  I hugged one of the pillows for comfort and tried to squash the hurt bubbling up in my stomach. I really shouldn’t be sulking about this, but being called Ayra hurt more than expected. Even if it was a silly mistake.

  “Tate, look at me. Believe me when I say that I haven’t really thought about Ayra ever since I learned about what was going on.”

  I hid my face in the fabric. “You haven’t?” I muttered, afraid that I’d believe her because I wanted to believe her.

  “You’ve been the one thing circling my mind permanently. It’s ridiculous and silly and it makes no sense, but I’m always hoping to see you.”

  “Oh...” A warmth bubbled up in my stomach and I could feel it override the hurt. That was a good sign?

  “I’m always thinking about you. Obsessively thinking about you. You’re the one I want and it doesn’t matter in which body you are. If it’s yours, or Ayra’s, or I don’t know, a goat’s?”

  I couldn’t hold the chuckle back. “A goat’s?”

  Sian threw her hands up. “I, I don’t know. It’s what sprung to mind.”

  I could feel the tension leave my body and I dared to turn back around to Sian. “I guess it was bound to happen.”

  “It shouldn’t have. But it did. And I’m so sorry, but you’re the one I want to be with. You. Just you.”

  “Really?” I asked, biting my lip. Another something spread through my chest and I didn’t exactly recognise the feeling. But it was fuzzy and soft, and it was very fluttery. It was a tightness, and it felt explosive. But nothing like panic, or worry, or even the feeling of being trapped. It felt light and bubbly. It made me smile irrationally about nothing. Or everything. Because Sian wanted to be with me. Me me.

  “I want to be with you too,” I admitted, my words sparking the blue in her eyes. Nervously, she brushed her hair behind her ear, but it sprung back.

  “Yes?”

  “Yes,” I confirmed, brushing the stubborn lock of hair behind her ear and holding my hand against the side of her face. Just because. To ‘help’ her hair stay back, but that was just a thinly veiled excuse so I could touch her skin.

  Sian melted against my hand and this time, I was the one pressing my forehead against hers. Why not, right? If she could do it to me, I could do it to her.

  Huh. Wow. I felt equal.

  I never felt that way with Devon. There was always this distinct feeling of being his woman, being someone he wanted to take care of. Not that I needed him to. But with Sian, maybe, maybe I could take care of her.

  Yes, I liked that. And I wanted it.

  I wanted to take care of Sian. And as hard as it was to admit, I did want her to take care of me.

  Fuck, I had it bad. But that was fine, because from the stars dancing across her eyes, I could tell she was just as smitten.

  Were things really working out this smoothly? Was this the universe’s way of making up to me for all the years of living as an outcast dragon?

  I sure hoped so.

  Without any hesitation, I pressed my lips on Sian’s, capturing her in a kiss. I never initiated. But with her, I wanted to. I needed to. And I didn’t just want a simple kiss, I wanted more. I wanted Sian. Only Sian.

  Ayra, don’t swap back now.

  Chapter 19

  I squinted and brushed another stroke of maroon on the canvas. I nibbled on the tip of the paintbrush and admired the painting I just made.

  I was still rusty, but that was to be expected. I hadn’t painted in years. Not since.... I couldn’t even remember when or why I stopped. One day, I just stopped. And I never started.

  Until Sian gave me things to paint and draw again.

  I shook my head as I stared at the finished canvas. Sian’s dark blue eyes were st
aring back at me and she was almost lifelike.

  Yes, I definitely captured her spirit. And the little trickle of red I added just made her so much more real. She was almost here. Almost.

  I checked the watch around my wrist. Another two hours to kill before Ayra would swap us back. Damn that woman, why did she need to have a proper day job? And why did she want to spend more time on her side? It was the day before our birthday and I’d already made all the preparations. Not that I could prepare for a lot. My parents were taking care of everything. How could they not. This was their last hope of redemption. It was my last chance, really.

  The Elders would gather and I was supposed to be doing the ritual mating dance with Devon. And with me, I meant Ayra. Because well, I couldn’t shift into my dragon form. That really hadn’t changed. But according to Devon, Ayra was getting really good at it.

  I couldn’t deny that part of me was jealous, that part of me wished I could shift like her. But it just wasn’t meant to be. I had as little affinity with water as I had my whole life and all I did, was splash in the lake like a dragonling. No scales, no tail, and certainly no wings for me.

  But that was okay. I had a vampire body that did what I wanted. That loved the taste of blood and according to Sian, I was gaining a healthy blush on my cheeks from regularly feeding.

  Even Ayra admitted in her notes that she felt that her vampire body was stronger than before. She thanked me for taking such good care of her body and I couldn’t but agree she did the same for me. I glanced at my manicured nails and ran a hand through my silky hair. Somehow, she managed to control the frizziness of it. Yes, she certainly was taking good care of me.

  I placed the painting of Sian next to the window so it could dry and grabbed a white canvas. If I had time to kill, I should make something for Ayra. I already bought her a red velvet cake to celebrate her birthday.... Our birthday? I hoped she could see the humour in the blood red cake and the blue filling inside would definitely make up for the little prank. I’d have made it myself, but I figured that burning down my house wasn’t exactly a nice birthday gift.

  But I figured I could get my soul twin another type of present.

  I washed the redness out of my brush and dipped it in the royal blue. Red was Sian’s colour and for this particular painting, I needed blue. Lots of blue. Devon was a big dragon after all. Yes, she would like this.

  The alarm on my phone blared and happily, I put the last lick of paint on my canvas. I grabbed both the portraits and carried them over to my room. It was a bit strange to have a room in my own house, but it let me and Devon peacefully co-exist during the day, while I lent my body every evening and night to Ayra.

  “Honey, I’m home!”

  My ex-fiancé came barreling inside and the excitement on his face wasn’t like anything I’d ever seen in the years we’d been together. He had never been this on time either. He usually called to say he ran late or was pulling an extra shift. I always figured the hospital was demanding, but with Ayra in his life, he had never been more than five minutes late. He definitely couldn’t stay away from her.

  But he didn’t seem to know we were swapping later today. Apologetically, I held up my paintbrush. “Sorry, Dev. It’s still me.”

  “Oh, hi, Tate,” he smiled, not unkindly. I could tell he was disappointed, but he was doing a pretty good job of hiding it.

  “Sorry, Ayra insisted on swapping a little later than usual.”

  “Hmmm... Okay then. I’m sure she has her reasons. You’ve been painting?” he asked, pointing at my paint-stained fingers. Ooops, Ayra would give me a hard time for that. She liked her fingers all nice and pristine and I just couldn’t be bothered.

  “Yes, I made a painting for Ayra as a present. It’s in my room. Would you give it to her tomorrow when she’s here?”

  A surprised look appeared on his face. “You made Ayra a present?”

  “Yes, I did? Is that weird? Shouldn’t I have?”

  Devon smiled. “No, it’s sweet. I’ll make sure she gets it.”

  He followed me to the kitchen as I scrubbed my hands and brushes with turpentine. “You ready for tomorrow?”

  “A whole afternoon with your parents and the clan Elders? Yes, bring it on.” he grinned, pulling his tie loose and draping it on the counter.

  “I hope Ayra will manage to keep up pretences and convince everyone she’s me,” I pondered. I could only imagine the scandal if people found out there was a vampire living in my body. Was she a vampire? She just had a vampire body. But by all means, she was more a dragon than I’d ever been.

  Devon chuckled as he rummaged through the fridge. “She’s pretty bad at not being herself.”

  “Hey, I doubt my parents will care. As long as I turn into a shiny blue dragon, they couldn’t care less, right?” I reasoned, scratching my chin.

  “No, that’s not—” Devon muttered, changing his sentence as he found on a fried chicken leg. “No, you’re right. They really like Ayra, I’m afraid. Although Evan seems to be a bit sceptical.”

  “Oh, what’s this?” he inquired, holding up the cake box I had hidden behind the yogurt drinks Ayra apparently enjoyed. Damn, not hidden well enough then. “Is it cake?”

  I grinned and gently slapped his hand. “Yes, but it’s not for now so you can’t eat the cake. That’s for Ayra when she gets here.”

  “But it smells tasty,” he whined, sniffing at the box.

  “It’s supposed to be.”

  “Can’t I have a little bite?”

  “No, you hungry dragon!” I snorted, shoving the box back into the fridge and pulling him away. “Just eat your chicken. It’s almost time for the swap. I hope you’ve got something nice planned for you two?”

  “Yes, yes, I do.”

  I tilted my head curiously. This was probably none of my business, but I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to know what Devon came up with. “What have you planned?”

  “Ummm...”

  “You’ve got something planned, right? Right?”

  “Yes, but it’s... Umm...” He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck as he pointed at his crotch.

  “OH.”

  I rolled my eyes and shook my head. Men. What a surprise. Devon did always like the physical side of things. But apparently, so did Ayra. At least, that was what I gathered from what Sian and Devon told me about her. Apart from the notes we exchanged, I hadn’t actually had any dealings with her. But she sounded lovely. And definitely, definitely everything Devon wanted. Everything I wanted to be for Devon, but couldn’t.

  “We’re about to swap, I believe. Unless she’s running late.”

  Devon’s eyes lit up. “She never runs late. Unlike someone else I know.”

  “Whatever.”

  “Now go, get ready. And don’t worry about the ceremony, Ayra and I will figure it out.”

  I bit my lip as I studied Devon. I could tell from his face, from his whole posture, from his whole demeanour. He was happy. So very happy. And Ayra made it so.

  My phone blared its final alarm again and I gave Devon a final tap on his wrist. “I’m about to leave. Don’t eat the cake!”

  “Fine, fine. Unless I can convince Ayra to eat it as dinner,” he muttered, licking his lips at the thought of cake. I snickered and rolled my eyes at him. Ayra had really developed his sweet tooth with all the baking she did for him. Not that I could blame him. She really did make delicious pastries. And our swapping seemed to burn extra calories, so I could eat all the sweet treats I wanted. Not a bad advantage, not bad at all.

  I climbed on the barstool and prepared myself for the swap. Over the past weeks, Ayra and I had really streamlined the process and it was becoming easier with every swap.

  “Tate?”

  I opened one eye, glancing at my former partner. His dark eyes shimmered so brightly, I almost didn’t recognise him. He seemed much more alive, much more himself.

  “Yes?”

  “Happy birthday. I hope you have a good time with your wom
an.”

  I smiled and returned his wish. “You too, Devon.”

  Chapter 20

  The scent of chocolate found my nose and I quickly opened my eyes. “Hi!”

  “Welcome home,” Sian smiled, bending down so she could kiss me. I melted under her touch, happily letting her kiss me.

  “Good evening,” I grinned, trying not to sound like I had been looking forward to this all day. Oh, who was I kidding. She knew I was.

  “Hi,” she smiled back, pecking me on the lips again.

  “Good swap?”

  I touched my head and looked around me. “Yes, no headache, no blurred vision. Perfect swap.”

  “Ayra is getting good at it!” Blondie smiled, looking rather proud of her ex. Her friend? her Ayra? I wasn’t too sure how they would define their relationship at the moment, but they seemed on very good terms.

  “She really is. I wish I could control them like she could, but ehh, it works this way.”

  “It sure does. How was Devon?”

  I chuckled. Ayra probably rambled on so much about Devon, that Sian must know him better than I did by now. In a strange way, she had started to care for him, I believed. At least, in her own way. “He’s good, he was looking forward to seeing Ayra.”

  “Ah, that’s good. I hope he’ll treat Ayra right.”

  I placed a hand on her wrist. “He will.”

  “Oh, Ayra made you a cake.”

  “Oooh, I thought I smelled chocolate. It’s chocolate, right? Not raisins?” I asked, pulling a face. I really hated raisins. Almost as much as I disliked peas.

  “Yes, all chocolate. White, milk, and dark. But she said it needed to cool a little bit more before you could dive in.”

  “Hmmm... Ayra is not here though. And I like hot cake.”

  Sian chuckled as she kissed my temple. “I’ll cut you a slice.”

  “I bought a cake for her as well, and I asked the baker to make it blood red. Just to tease her.”

  “You didn’t.”

  I puffed up my chest, rather proud that I thought of such a good prank. “I did. But it’s all sapphire blue inside.”