The Consequences of Sin
Page 15
“Maybe it’s too late for us. Maybe you thought you meant more to me than you ever really did.”
Then, he was gone.
It wasn’t until after midnight when Reid finally decided to come back to the hotel room. I’d been unable to sleep as I waited for him, too worried that something had happened to him or that he’d taken off for good. It had taken every ounce of willpower I possessed not to go out and search for him, but I knew I couldn’t. After everything that had happened, I knew he wouldn’t want me hunting him down.
When he finally came back, he didn’t say a word to me. Instead, he kicked his shoes off and lay down on the edge of the bed, facing away from me. I ground my teeth together to keep from asking where he’d been. It didn’t matter. He was back now, and I could protect him.
With that thought in mind, I slipped into unconsciousness. Less than an hour later, I awoke to the sound of Reid’s moans. I rolled over to see him kicking and flailing his arms.
“Reid, wake up!” I shouted as I stood up. I watched as he thrashed around, his legs tangling in the sheets. “Bloody hell!” I growled as I tried to stay clear of his arms.
They were thrashing about like the rest of him, and I didn’t want him to land another solid punch. My face clearly remembered the last time he’d hit me on accident. I had no intentions of reliving that pain.
I continued to shout his name, but it didn’t seem like he could hear me. Frustrated that I couldn’t do anything to help him, I moved further away from the bed and waited for him to calm down. After a few minutes, he stopped moving. His chest heaved up and down as his eyes slowly opened.
“You okay?” I asked as I watched him sit up.
“Fine,” he said as he looked around the room. His eyes looked wild and scared.
“Are you really fine? Or are you feeding me a line of bullshit, so I’ll leave you alone?” I asked.
He shot a glare in my direction. “I told you I was fine.”
I stepped closer, no longer worried that I’d have to defend myself against him. I knew he wouldn’t intentionally hurt me. “And I’m calling bullshit, Reid. This is the third time that I know of that you’ve been like this. You need to tell me what’s going on. Maybe I can help you.”
“There’s nothing you can do to help me, Bree, so stay out of my business.”
“After everything I told you a few hours ago, you won’t tell me what’s going on with you? That’s ridiculous, and we both know it. Give me a bloody chance, would you?”
He glared at me. “If I knew what the goddamn problem was, I would’ve fixed it already. I don’t fucking know what’s wrong!”
“You don’t know why you’re flailing and moaning in your sleep?” I asked, confused.
“No, I don’t. All I know is, I have nightmares that I wake up from almost every night. I can never remember what they’re about, but whatever it is, it scares the fuck out of me.”
I sat down on the bed, careful not to brush against him. “How long has this been happening?”
He shrugged. “I’m not really sure—for as long as I can remember though. I think they started after my mom’s first divorce, but I’m not positive.”
I thought back to the weeks and even months after I’d lost my mother. The nightmares I’d endured were horrendous. They were so bad that I had felt terrified to close my eyes at night. Her death had triggered them, and it had taken me a long time to learn how to deal with them. I’d learned how to face the facts of death by the time I turned four.
“Have you ever talked to anyone about these nightmares?” I asked.
“What would I say? I have bad dreams I can’t remember, but after I wake up, they keep me up half the night? Any doctor out there would think I’m crazy, Bree. I’m starting to think I am.”
I shook my head. “Something is triggering them, Reid. If you want them to stop, you need to figure out what happened.”
He looked away, and it clicked.
“You don’t need to figure out what it is. You already know, and you’re lying to me!” I was past angry. I was furious. I was trying to help him, and he was keeping things from me.
“Let it go, Bree,” he said quietly.
“No, tell me what happened!”
He stood up so fast that I nearly fell off the bed in surprise. “You want to know all the fucked-up things going through my head? Fine, I’ll tell you. My goddamn stepdad held a gun to my head when I was nine because my mother tried to leave him. He even pulled the trigger, but the sick fuck hadn’t bothered to put any bullets in it—unlike your friend who had absolutely no problem putting a loaded gun to my back.”
I winced. “Jesus. No wonder you’re having nightmares. Yesterday brought all that shit back tenfold.”
“You don’t say,” he said sarcastically.
“I’m sorry for what happened to you because of me. I really am. I never meant to bring you into this, but, Reid, you’ve got to talk to someone, so you can get past this.”
“Like you need to talk to someone about how your daddy has you all fucked up?” he asked angrily.
I winced. “No, I’ve never talked to anyone about him, except for Wes and you, but you’re right. I need to. I live in constant fear because of what he’s done to me.”
His face softened a little, and I saw regret flood his eyes. “I’m sorry, Bree. I didn’t mean to bring all that shit up now. You didn’t deserve that.”
I shrugged. “It’s all true. There’s no sense in denying it.”
He sighed. “So, where do we go from here?”
“For starters, we have to actually trust each other for this to work. I will keep you alive, but you have to trust me, so I can do that. Can you trust me, Reid? I want you to look me in the eye and tell me that you can.”
He kept his gaze steady with mine as he studied me. I saw a brief flash of hesitation cross his eyes before determination took its place.
“I trust you to keep me alive, Bree. You’ve lied to me over and over, but I’m giving you one more chance to prove that you really do give a damn about me. Don’t fuck it up.”
I wanted him to forgive me for everything that I’d done, but I knew it wouldn’t be that easy. It would take time for him to learn to trust me fully again.
Him agreeing to trust me to keep him alive was a tiny step, and it would have to do—for now.
“And everything that we talked about earlier?” I asked.
He glared. “We’ll figure that shit out when the time comes. We have bigger issues to worry about right now.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m just afraid that I’m going to lose you,” I said.
“Drop it,” Reid said as he came back to bed before lying down. He turned away from me. “Go to sleep, Bree. I’m going to need you awake tomorrow if you plan on keeping my ass alive.”
I fought back a smart-ass remark as I lay down again. “Good night.”
I don’t think either of us slept much that night.
The next morning, I woke up at barely past five. After another quick shower, simply because I was afraid I wouldn’t have one for a long time if my father caught up to us, I dressed and tossed my things in my bag. I shoved my gun against the small of my back. It gave me comfort knowing that it was there.
Next, I woke up Reid. That was problematic at best. Reid definitely wasn’t a morning person, and trying to wake him up was like poking a sleeping bear with a Taser. Once he was finally up, I munched on a granola bar I’d taken from our place as he went to the bathroom to change.
I rolled my eyes once he was inside. I’d seen him naked before, but he obviously didn’t want me to see him like that again. Such modesty for a stripper. I winced. I was being an asshole, and I had no right to be.
Reid deserved space and time to figure out whether or not he could handle everything I’d dropped on him.
“I’m ready.”
I looked up to see Reid walking out of the bathroom. He threw his dirty clothes into his bag and zipped it up before head
ing straight to the door.
“Stay here for a few,” I said as I tossed my wrapper into the garbage.
“What? Why?”
“Because we’ve traveled too far in your car already. I need to get us a new one.”
“You’re seriously going to walk out of this door and steal someone’s car?” he asked.
I nodded. “I am. Stay here. Just watch out of the window. When I pull up outside, come down. Make sure to grab both of our bags.”
He shook his head. “I’m in a fucking video game right now, right? This is like Grand Theft Auto or some bullshit like that.”
I grinned. “Not quite, but if it’ll help you sleep better at night, then pretend.”
With that, I moved past him and slipped outside. The parking lot was relatively empty, even for this early in the morning. That was both good and bad—good because no one would see me trying to break into a car and bad because my car choices were limited.
I scanned the lot, hoping to find a car we could use. If not, we would be forced to use Reid’s car again. We’d already been in it for far too long.
I smiled when I spotted an older model Ford Explorer. It would be perfect. There were a ton of those on the road, and it was old enough that I would be able to hot-wire it. I glanced around once just to make sure that no one was around before walking toward the car. I moved purposefully across the lot, never once looking around. I didn’t want to look guilty.
When I reached the Ford, I grabbed the driver’s side door and pulled. I’d expected it to be locked, so I stumbled back when the door actually opened. I shook my head. People were far too trusting in this world.
I slid into the seat and reached under the steering wheel. I ran my fingers along the cover, searching for the hidden clips that held it in place. After a minute, I finally found them. I quickly pulled the cover off and tossed it into the backseat and out of the way. I grabbed the wires and pulled them out, so I could see them. After sorting through them, I finally found the right bundle—the one that held the battery, starter, and ignition wires.
“Bingo,” I whispered.
I carefully peeled about an inch of the insulation off the battery wires. I quickly twisted them together before grabbing the ignition wire and peeling its insulation off as well. I wrapped it around the battery wires and smiled when the dash panel lit up.
All that was left of the wiring was the starter wire. I hated messing with it. If I wasn’t careful, I’d end up electrocuting myself. Death by starter wire wasn’t the way I wanted to go. I carefully stripped off the insulation, taking off barely more than half an inch. I carefully touched it to the battery and ignition wires and watched as it sparked. The car started but quickly died. I grumbled as I pressed them together again. This time, as soon as the car started, I revved it to keep it going.
“Yes!” I said excitedly as the car idled, waiting for my next move. I still had to break the steering loose. If only it were as simple as it looked in the movies and on TV…
Hoping that it would break free if I kept turning the wheel, I started pushing and pulling the steering wheel back and forth as hard as I could. I grinned when it finally broke loose.
I hurriedly put the Explorer in drive and drove across the lot. As soon as I stopped outside of our room, Reid appeared. He ran to the car and threw the rear passenger door open.
After tossing our bags inside, he slammed the door shut and climbed in beside me. “Go!” he said, looking like a lunatic.
I gave him a strange look before shaking my head and pulling out of the lot.
“I can’t believe we just stole this car!” he said frantically.
I ignored him as I turned onto an entrance ramp. We hit I-44, going east. I still had no idea where we were going. My only plan was to keep driving and hope that Wesley would find me and let me know what to do next.
We drove for a few miles before I took another exit. Our car was almost out of gas, and I needed a moment to get my shit together. Reid didn’t speak as we pulled into a gas station. I walked inside, picked up a map, and paid cash since we couldn’t use our credit cards. When I returned, Reid was standing outside of the car, pumping gas for me.
“Thanks,” I said, giving him a small smile.
He nodded before turning away. I sighed. With him giving me the silent treatment again, it was going to be a long day. I walked to the passenger side and opened the back door. I unzipped my bag and pulled out Bradley’s gun. After checking to make sure that it was loaded, I hid it under my shirt and walked back around the car to the driver’s side.
Reid was screwing the cap back on the gas tank. He wouldn’t look at me as we passed. He walked to the passenger side and climbed in.
Once we were both inside, I pulled the gun out from underneath my shirt and handed it to him. “Here, take this.”
“Why?” he asked as he carefully took the gun from my hand.
“Because you might end up using it,” I told him. I was done trying to hide things. If he asked me a question, I would answer it.
“I’ve never shot a gun in my life,” Reid mumbled as he stared down at it.
“It’s simple,” I said as I took the gun from him. “This is the safety. It needs to be off to fire. If you’re out of ammo and need to reload, push this. It’ll pop the magazine out. This is the slide. Pull it back if you need to reload. Once it’s loaded, you won’t need to pull it back again. Use the sight here to aim. Line it up and shoot. But if you want the truth, if it comes to you using this thing, you’re not going to have time to aim. Just point, and pull the trigger, okay?” I looked up to see him staring at me. “What?”
He swallowed roughly before looking away. “Nothing.”
“Tell me,” I urged, wondering what on earth was going through his mind.
He finally looked back at me. “It’s just…I’m sitting at an Exxon with a beautiful British assassin, learning how to use a gun. I guess I can check this off my bucket list. My life has become a movie.”
“You think I’m beautiful?” I asked, taken aback by his admission.
He smirked. “Of course that’s the only thing you took away from that sentence.”
I felt my cheeks heat in embarrassment. “Do you understand how to use the gun?”
He nodded as he took the gun from me. “Yeah, I got it.”
He flicked the safety off and then back on and carefully placed the gun in the glove box. I unfolded the map I’d grabbed from inside and looked at it.
“We’re in…Rolla, Missouri, according to this map. We just need to figure out where to go from here. Or we can just keep driving. What do you think?” I asked as I glanced over at Reid.
“I think we need to find someplace safe to hide out. We can’t keep driving. Eventually, we’ll run out of cash, and we’ll have to use our credit cards.”
I nodded. “I agree. I just have no idea where to go.”
He studied the map. “When I was a teenager, I’d spend a few weeks every summer up in Nebraska with my friend Ryan and his grandpa. They had a cabin up there. It was in the middle of nowhere. We could go there.”
“Do you remember where it was?” I asked.
He bit his lip, and I had to look away before I decided to do the same thing.
“It was west of Lincoln. I remember that. Give me the map.”
I handed it over to him, and he held it up close to his face.
After a minute, he smiled. “I remember now. It was just outside of Hastings.”
“You’re sure?”
“Positive. We could go there. I doubt if anyone would ever find us.”
I took the map from him and searched for Hastings. If we drove fast, we could probably make it there by tonight. “If we take interstate sixty-three to seventy, that’ll take us right into Kansas City. We can take twenty-nine clear into Nebraska.” I traced my finger along the map. “Then, we hit two and get onto interstate eighty. It seems simple enough.”
Reid nodded. “Let’s do it then.”
I hit the interstate again with a smile on my face. It felt good to have a plan. I felt less helpless. A cabin in Nebraska was about to become our salvation. I just hoped that we could make it there without any problems.
“I’m bored as fuck,” Reid mumbled a few miles outside of Kansas City.
We’d stopped a few miles back to get gas, food, and to stretch our legs. Already, I felt ready to take a nap. Our stop hadn’t been nearly long enough, and with the car being completely silent, our trip to Nebraska was taking forever.
“Turn the radio on then,” I said through a yawn.
Reid reached over and pushed the power button. Both of us froze as a song started blaring through the speakers.
“Bloody hell!” I yelled finally. “Is that song saying what I think it’s saying?”
Reid was fighting not to laugh as he nodded. “I think my anaconda is going to crawl up my ass and die if I have to hear any more of that song.”
I bit my lip as I tried not to laugh at him. He reached over and turned the rap song off. He shook his head, amusement clearly written on his face, and I lost it.
I started laughing embarrassingly loud. “You bloody Americans listen to the strangest music.”
“Hey, I just turned the radio on. Don’t blame me.”
I finally managed to stop laughing like a hyena. “I happen to remember you dancing to that kind of music at the club and at your work.”
He shrugged. “I dance to whatever has a good beat. That…well, let’s say I have no intentions of ever taking my clothes off to that.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
I was surprised that he hadn’t instantly said no. The last few minutes, he’d said more to me than he had in hours.
“How did you end up being a stripper? I mean, it’s not like guys plan on doing something like that.”
He grinned. “No, I didn’t grow up with aspirations to become a stripper. Truthfully, I kind of fell into the job on accident.”
“Do tell,” I said as I glanced over at him.
“We were at a party one night, and my friend dared me to get up on the table and start stripping. I was drunk off my ass, so it sounded like a great idea, and I managed to do it. One of my friends, Shelba, was there. She was…impressed by my performance. When I sobered up the next day, she told me about the club and how her boyfriend made a shit-ton of cash there. I thought, what the hell? I went to the club, and they hired me as soon as I auditioned. I was shocked.”