Dancing in Circles (Circles Trilogy)

by Adams, Victoria

  Julie snuggled closer. She understood this was as close as he could get to telling her he loved her. And that made her content.

  Needing to separate himself from the tension of the moment, Robert glanced at his watch. "We're outta here."

  She tightened her grip around his neck. "No, not yet."

  "You gotta a dance exam tomorrow." He ducked his head out of her grip; sorry to be away from her touch, but relieved to have a chance to sort out what just happened.

  Reluctantly, Julie led him towards Jennifer. After they said good-bye and exited the house, Robert held out his hand. "Keys."

  Julie tightened her fingers around them. "You were drinking."

  "One beer and that was like an hour ago." He motioned his fingers asking for the keys.

  ***

  Robert parked in a secluded spot overlooking the bay. The lights of North Shore reflected on the water. He killed the engine, got out of the car, walked around to the front, and leaned on the hood. Julie stood next to him.

  "I knew this place had to be around here somewhere. See that big buildin' cross the bay, just to the left." He stretched out his arm and pointed. "I've spent a lot of time over there dreamin' about being here."

  He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. "Know what's funny?"

  She snuggled next to him. "What?"

  "Now that I'm out, I've realized how tied to that place I am. A lot of people depend on me, whether I like it or not."

  "You've got to choose what's right for Robert."

  "Problem is, Robert don't know. He thought he did, then this sexy little ballerina came along and screwed things up. Not even in my wildest fantasies did I dream you up." He placed a kiss on the side of her head.

  They stood in silence in the cool of the night until Julie shivered. Robert released her and turned back to the car. "I'd better get ya home. The ballerina's got an exam tomorrow."

  He reached for her hand and pulled her back. "Kiss for luck." He held her close and pressed his lips on hers.

  Under the starry night sky and in the warmth of his love, Julie smiled. I don't need luck, Robert. I've got you.

  ***

  When she arrived at the dance studio Saturday afternoon, it was pure chaos. Younger students were leaving their exams as older ones nervously flitted about waiting for their turn. Parents wandered about holding cups of coffee and chatting with each other.

  Julie slipped into the change room, put on her dance clothes, picked up her pointe shoes and walked into the smaller studio where her classmates warmed up. She gabbed with her friends as she wrapped her toes and tied her shoes. Settling herself at her favourite place at the barre, she warmed up her muscles before practicing some of the combinations she would be required to perform in the exam.

  Madame entered and motioned to the three girls. Julie steeled her nerves, hugged her friends and led the way to the larger studio.

  Her heart pounded in her chest as she reached for the doorknob. She remembered Robert's kiss, felt a surge of confidence and stepped into the room. Two hours later, she emerged from the exam soaked in sweat. She'd lost confidence a few times, but then she'd remember Robert's kiss, take a deep breath and try again. There were weak parts but she wasn't expected to be a professional. Dare she dream about becoming one? She showered and started for the exit.

  Madame stopped her. "Class tonight?"

  "If you wish. Won't you be too tired?"

  "I'm never too tired to watch you dance."

  Back at the dance school by six thirty, Julie changed and entered the main studio. Her body ached from the exertion of the exam, but she put the pain out of her mind and warmed up. Madame entered about five after seven. Julie was surprised to see Ruth, the studio pianist, enter behind her. For these extra classes Madame had used recorded music. Julie wondered why she had changed this evening. Nodding a greeting to Ruth, she switched her attention back to Madame.

  Class was gruelling and although Julie tried her best, towards the end of the two hours, she faltered. Her energy reserves were depleted. Madame stopped Ruth with a flick of her hand. She faced Julie. "Do you want to be a dancer?"

  "Yes," Julie said between puffs.

  "Dancers do not quit. They dance sick, injured and exhausted. They reach down inside themselves and find the energy to dance or they leave."

  Julie inhaled a deep breath, set herself, nodded to Ruth and executed the combination. Ten minutes later, Madame dismissed her. She curtsied to Ruth and Madame and then dragged herself to the showers.

  Two ladies, who observed from the visitor's lounge, entered the studio. Robert moved closer to the front to hear what they said.

  "Divine, Madame." The smaller of the two clasped her hands. "She dances like a professional already. Such technique. Accurate, sharp. Such artistry."

  "Especially in one so young." The older woman continued, "You say she's auditioning for the Civic?"

  Madame nodded.

  "Good training ground, but why not the National Dance Company?" the first woman asked.

  "She doesn't think she's good enough."

  "Pardon?" The second woman's eyebrows popped up to her hairline. "She received the highest score I've ever awarded."

  The smaller one patted Madame on the arm. "I'll talk with Eric and arrange an audition. Do you think she'd attend?"

  Even if I have to carry her there myself. Robert walked back and stretched out on the sofa.

  The three ladies walked out of the studio. Madame's gaze narrowed as she spotted Robert. "May I help you?"

  Julie exited the change room. "He's with me."

  "I'm with her." Robert pointed at Julie.

  "Robert, this is Madame, my ballet teacher."

  They nodded to each other. Madame introduced Julie to the two examiners then asked, "Could I ask you to lock up? The ladies are tired and wish to get back to their hotel."

  "No problem." Julie held out her hand and took the offered key. "I remember the security code. I'll check that everything is set."

  Julie walked with Madame to the front entrance, wished her a good evening and closed the studio door. When she returned to the main room, Robert was still lying on the sofa. Julie stood in front of him, her hands resting on her hips. "My, don't you look comfy! I've been busting my butt all day, and you're stretched out looking like a king."

  "Busting that cute little butt of yours, I might add." His hand slid up the back of her thigh. "So how's my little ballerina?"

  "Tired. But I think I did okay." She held out her hand and led him to the studio. "Take your shoes off." She opened the door and turned on the lights. "You taught me how to dance last night. Now I'm going to teach you."

  "Oh, boy."

  "I'll ignore your sarcasm. Put your foot up like this." She lifted her leg and rested her ankle on the barre.

  On his first attempt, Robert didn't make it. He adjusted his jeans and tried again. "Ta da. Ow, this hurts."

  "Think that hurts. Try this." Julie extended her arms over her head and bent until her entire upper body rested on the leg extended before her.

  Robert winced.

  She turned her head and popped her eyebrows up and down. "Your turn."

  "Yea, right."

  "I thought Shoresmen were brave and tough. Pain didn't exist and all that."

  Robert dropped his leg off the barre. "Gawd, if the guys ever saw me."

  "You're such a wuss."

  "Yea, but don't tell no body."

  She lowered her leg and walked to the center of the room. "Can you lift me?"

  Robert shrugged, walked over and hoisted her over his shoulder.

  Julie pounded on his back. "I didn't mean like a sack of potatoes."

  He lowered her to the floor. "Ya said lift me."

  "I'm going to leap to you." She grabbed his wrists and placed his hands on her waist. "I going to jump and you'll catch and lift me."

  He thrust her straight up. "Ya don't need to jump. Ya don't weigh anything. Definitely less than a
bale of hay."

  Julie looked down at him. "I don't know if that's a compliment. You can put me down now."

  "Ok."

  "I'm going to spin like this." She stepped back and executed a double pirouette. "When I stop, you grab me and raise me over your head. Ready?"

  "No problem."

  Julie stepped out of his grasp, set for her spin and when she landed it, she nodded. Robert grabbed her waist and popped her up into the air. "Good. Put me down, please. Let's try it again."

  After the third try, Robert bench pressed her high over his head, locked his elbows and held her there. Tilting his head up to look at her he said, "Ya know, I should thank Carl for this. All those years of chucking bales of hay has finally paid off."

  "Put me down, but keep holding my waist."

  As he lowered her, Julie slid the length of her body down his chest. When her feet touched the ground, she arched back, held the pose then straightened. She looked him in the eyes and smiled. She felt very secure in his arms, as if she belonged there.

  Julie dug her mp3 player out of her purse and thumbed through her playlist until she selected a love ballad. She clicked the player into the sound dock and programmed continuous replay. "We're going to choreograph a dance."

  Robert scratched his chin. "Like I know what that means."

  "We're going to create a dance. Choreography is the art of creating a dance. That's important. There's an exam on this later."

  "I think I gotta go do…somethin'." He turned to leave.

  She threw a playful punch onto his arm. "Get back here. I want to listen to the song to get some ideas."

  Julie sat in the center of the room facing the mirrors and listened to the music. Robert settled behind and wrapped his legs and arms around her. In the warmth and overwhelming sense of protection, Julie closed her eyes and let her mind wander.

  Robert watched her reflection in the mirror, fascinated with how involved in the music she was. He guessed that on some plane, she'd transported her spirit somewhere else.

  As the song played, he massaged her shoulders and upper back. A familiar stirring flowed through his body. Robert tried to quiet it. He wouldn't pressure Julie to have sex with him. With her, he wanted more. He wanted passion, emotional commitment and possibly even love.

  He wondered if he was already in love. Did wanting to make love instead of just having sex mean he was falling for her? Did the fact he was willing to wait for Julie mean he was in love? If that were true, where was the giddy, light-headed feeling? Julie said she was falling in love with him. How long did that take? How long does a person stay in love?

  People in North Shore seemed happy for only a brief while. Paul and Kaley seemed crazy with each other at first. Now both were miserable. Why do people fall out of love? When would he know? Would a bolt of lightning come down and strike him? Or would he just know?

  Julie shifted around to face him. "Can I kiss you?"

  His brow wrinkled.

  She placed a hand on each cheek. "You have a strange expression on your face."

  "Just thinkin'."

  "Penny for your thoughts."

  "Keep the penny. Give me the kiss."

  Respecting his unwillingness to talk, Julie planted a tender kiss on his lips. "Now, up, up. I'm—" Her smartphone chimed. She dug it out of her purse and checked the message.

  H.B.D! Julie. Hugs Tricia.

  She checked the time. 12:01. Chuckling, she tossed the cell back into her purse. "Okay, I'm ready to dance."

  Julie showed him different ways to lift and hold her, how to spin and catch her. She marked out some dance moves between each pose. Robert fought to keep his focus on her words and instructions and not on the sensual movements she performed or the closeness of her body when he held her in a pose.

  "And we'll end with the last lift we did. Hold me for a few counts, lower me slowly and then I'll end with an arch."

  He blinked, sighed and nodded.

  She pressed play and began to move. When they finished, she said, "Good rehearsal. A dancer becomes involved with the music. Feel it as you move me. Don't worry about counts or beats. Just feel the passion of dancing."

  Robert yawned. "Aren't you beat? I'm tired and I haven't been dancing all day."

  "I'm strangely wired with energy." She wrapped her arms around his neck. "You energize me. Inspire me. My soul feels like it's going to explode if I don't move."

  He leaned his face closer. "I've never been anyone's inspiration before." He kissed her. A simple kiss expressing what his soul felt, but his mouth couldn't say.

  Julie stepped back, breathing deeply trying to settle the rush of emotion that his kiss exploded within her.

  Her hands trembled as she picked up and dropped her mp3 player. "Ready?" Her voice cracked.

  Robert shook himself and walked to the spot where he was supposed to start. Julie prepped the music then walked to her starting point and waited for the song to start.

  After the few first bars, Julie abandoned herself to the music with full confidence that Robert would do his part. Knowing he was involved and focused on her, she danced her feelings and emotions for him. Through her choreography, she'd tell him she was willing to love him. As the song neared its ending, she ran to him and jumped. He caught her waist and lifted her high.

  Robert held her until the music started to fade then slid her down the length of his body. As Julie's feet touched the ground, she paused to look at him. And shivered. There was an intensity in his eyes she'd never seen before. He slid his hand up her back and rested it on the back of her head. Instead of allowing Julie to arch back, he pushed her head towards his. Their lips met. Julie's body melted into his. He lowered the two of them to the ground, settling himself underneath her on the cold wood floor.

  He kissed her face, her neck and her lips. The heat of her body fuelled the flame within his soul.

  Julie trembled with excitement and fear. Should she abandon herself to him or stop him? She sat up and settled on his hips. He reached forward, undid her blouse then rested his hands on her upper chest and slid them down, stroking her curves. "You're beautiful. Do ya wanna make love, or do ya want me to stop?" His voice was husky.

  She lowered her gaze and bit her bottom lip. "I'm scared."

  "I know."

  "What about…?"

  "I'm not stupid." He pulled her down and hushed her with a kiss. "I've got protection."

  She tugged at the bottom of his sweatshirt, wrestled it over his head then snuggled down on his bare chest and listened to his heartbeat. "I wish you could tell me you loved me."

  "I can't tell you how I feel, but I can show you." His hands slid along her skin. Already he was familiar with the curve of her back. The way the waist curved in and the hips flared out. He ran his fingers up each vertebra of her spine then spread them out along the firm muscles of her upper back.

  Julie searched his gaze. Nothing she saw caused her to doubt him. "Teach me."

  Robert picked up his sweatshirt, rested it on her back then rolled the two of them over. He pressed up onto his hands. Beneath him lay the first person he knew he could love. Her face was flushed, her eyes wide open and her body trembling, with nerves or excitement, he didn't know. He would force himself to be patient and tender.

  "You're the most beautiful person I have ever known. Your eyes—" He closed his eyes and reopened them. "When you look at me…ah, I can't explain it. I don't have the words." He lowered his mouth to hers and hoped his kiss would fill in the missing thoughts.

  Julie revelled in the waves of emotions racing through her body each time he kissed or caressed her. She loved the feel of the firmness of his arm and shoulder muscles and the way the smooth skin rippled down his flat, hard stomach. She wanted to memorize every second to be able to savour this night forever, but was soon swept away with passion.

  Resting in his arms, a warm flush covered her body. Making love with Robert had been wonderful. He'd been patient, gentle and caring. "I love you."
/>   His hand caressed her arm in soft, slow strokes. "I wish I could tell ya I love ya. I don't know if I do. I know I want ya more than anyone else. Somethin' inside me comes alive when I think about ya. I feel happy just being in the same room. Maybe someday I'll figure out if what I'm feeling is love. I don't wanna lie to ya. I simply don't know."

  A small smile crept over Julie's face as her breaths matched the rhythm of Robert's brush along her arm.

  ***

  Two warm lips on her forehead and Robert's whispered, "Wake up," dragged Julie back from her contented nap. She opened her eyes. Robert was dressed except for his jacket, which he'd placed over her as a blanket. "Time to get ya home and put ya to bed."

  After she dressed, she followed him out of the studio. She paused at the doorway, turned and glanced at the place where they'd made love. What a wonderful birthday present.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Just past noon, Robert stepped off the last stair and headed towards the kitchen. He needed coffee. He grabbed a mug out of the cupboard. Hmph, been livin' here too long, startin' to know where things are. As he poured coffee into his mug, the smell of warm java tickled his nose.

  He wandered into the dining room looking for anyone. Finding it empty, he passed through into the living room and smiled at Julie as she stepped off the stairs. "Good morning." He placed his coffee on a side table and reached out. Julie moved one step to her right. Robert pulled his hand back and blinked.

  She rubbed her arms. Don't touch me. Everybody is going to know what we did. How can I face anybody? Oh why did I say yes? How can I tell him? Look at him. He looks so confused. Now what do I do? Julie glanced at the carpet then out the front living room then down at her hands. Where she didn't look was towards Robert. He lifted his coffee to take a sip.

  Julie's mother entered from the kitchen. "Good morning." She leaned closer and kissed her daughter's cheek. "Happy Birthday, hon."

  Though coughing and sputtering, Robert managed a weak, "Pardon?"

  "It's Julie's birthday. Didn't anybody tell you?"