Man of Honor (Passion in Paradise Book 4)

by Sarah O'Rourke

  “He’s taunting us. Whoever is responsible for sending this fucked up video is fixated on you still. They probably have been since they assaulted you eight years ago. This is a small town. Word’s gotten around that we’re getting married… that you’re finally moving on from what happened to you. He doesn’t like that and he’s acting out. He’s starting to act impulsively. Emotionally. He’s starting to make mistakes. Because as awful as seeing what’s on that video was for you, baby…it still helped us. It gave us information we hadn’t already possessed.”

  “Angie wasn’t the only new piece to the puzzle, Zeke. There was one more person there,” Honor continued on hesitantly, lifting a hand to swipe at the wet tears still on her cheeks.

  Zeke saw the look on Honor’s face and paled. “It’s someone we trusted, isn’t it?”

  Honor bit her lip and bobbed her head slightly. “Remember your promise to me.”

  Zeke took a deep breath as he stared into Honor’s cloudy eyes. “I’ll remember.”

  “I’m so sorry, Zeke. It was Sherry,” Honor confessed, ripping off the band aid and blurting the truth out in a rush.

  Zeke stared at Honor for a long moment, his normally sharp gaze temporarily vacant. “No,” he finally whispered, shaking his head slightly. “It was Sherry? Sherry Lawson?”

  Honor nodded. “I’m sorry, Zeke. She’s in the video, too. At first, I recognized her by the shoes she was wearing that night, but then her name was said and I heard her voice, and I recognized it. But I knew for sure when Angie reminded her how mad she was at you for leaving her that night…”

  “Wait,” Zeke interrupted, cupping his hand around Honor’s shoulders gently. “They mentioned me? The woman I took on a date the night you were kidnapped… the night those fuckers hurt you… she stood there while you were being raped and bitched about me? I knew those two were friends, but…I just…holy fuck!”

  Honor took a shaky breath as she met Zeke’s livid eyes. “Sherry was angry with you. And me. Apparently you got off that night with her, but you couldn’t be bothered to make sure she was taken care of because you were worried about me. You left her high and dry to go over to Aunt Orla’s and make sure I got home,” Honor whispered.

  “Son of a bitch!” Zeke roared, every muscle in his body tensing as he carefully sat Honor gently to the side and surged to his feet. “I’m gonna kill that fucking bitch,” he snarled, furious.

  “Zeke…”

  “She knew! That fuckin’ bitch knew where you were the entire time we searched for you! Jesus Christ,” he bit out, shoving a hand through his dark hair and fisting it against his scalp. “That cunt fucking prayed with me to find you, Honor!”

  Scalding tears rolled down Honor’s cheeks again as she witnessed his rage. His dissolution. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, baby. No!” Zeke denied, shaking his head as he stared at the wall. “I’m the one who’s sorry. She punished you because of me.”

  “Zeke, no. From the way it sounded on the video, she wanted them to stop, but they threatened her.”

  “I was a fucking cop even back then,” Zeke clipped out. “She knew I’d have protected her if she’d come to me and told me what was going on. She just took the easy way out. She looked out for herself and left you to a pack of vultures. And I put my fuckin’ dick in her on a regular goddamned basis – before AND after!” he raged, slamming his fist into the surface of the desk.

  “Zeke, please stop,” Honor wept, jerking sharply when he slammed his fist into the desk for a second time. She knew he’d never hurt her, but she wasn’t so sure he wouldn’t hurt himself if he didn’t calm down. Briefly, she thought about calling out for Diego to help her, but she instinctively knew Zeke would hate anyone seeing him at a weak moment. They had that in common.

  Freezing when he heard the frightened tremor in Honor’s fragile voice, Zeke turned contrite eyes toward her. “Shit! I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m an asshole,” he began to apologize, going to his knees in front of her again. “I lost my temper, baby, but it’s because I fucked up touching that bitch, bringing her into our lives. Not because of you. Don’t be scared of me,” he begged, his face tight with remorse.

  “I’m not,” she denied brokenly as he pulled her back into his arms and buried his hot face against her neck. “I don’t want to hear you talk about being with her… like that. I accept that it happened and it’s in the past, but I can’t listen to you say stuff like that.”

  “I know. I was a thoughtless prick,” he said roughly, lifting his head to meet her tired eyes. “I’m sorry. So fucking sorry,” he kept apologizing, lifting his hands to wipe the tears from her cheeks.

  “Its okay, Zeke. Really. It’ll be fine,” Honor sniffled.

  “I can arrest her. What she did was a clear obstruction of justice. From what you said, the video confirms that in spades. Christ, there are a shitload of charges I can throw at her.”

  “Zeke, no… she has a husband and a six year old little boy,” Honor denied, catching his hand in hers and squeezing it. “We can’t do that to her family.”

  “The hell I can’t,” Zeke countered flatly. “She turned her back on a child being raped. A good prosecutor could probably convince a jury that she was an accessory to the crimes themselves. She’s going to pay, Honor.”

  Honor closed her eyes. She’d know Zeke would want vengeance. Heck, a part of her did, too. But ruining a six year old little boy’s life to get her pound of flesh…she wasn’t sure how she felt about that. “Maybe she knows something, Zeke. Maybe she can tell us who the other two men were that hurt me. Couldn’t she make a deal? Help us and we don’t pursue criminal charges?”

  Zeke stared at Honor with his mouth hanging open. “You’re kidding, right?” Shaking his head, he tilted his head to stare at the ceiling. “I wanna dance across the bitch’s grave after I personally put her in it, and you want to offer her a plea agreement. How the hell can you give a single shit about what this will do to her life? Fuck her, Honor. You deserve some goddamn justice.”

  “I do,” Honor agreed softly. “And you’ll get it for me. Just not from Sherry.”

  “Why?” Zeke bit off. “You owe that bitch no loyalty. She left you there with those animals.”

  “I know, Zeke. But I’ve seen Sherry several times over the last eight years. Oh, she’s never spoken to me… hell, she’d barely look at me. I guess I understand why now. But, she and her husband come into the café every so often to eat with their son. And whatever she’s done… whatever evil she committed toward me… she’s still a good and loving mother to that child. I don’t want to save her life; I just don’t want to destroy his.”

  “I’ll have her picked up and brought into the station tomorrow morning. I’ll see what she knows and then decide if it’s worth a deal to us,” he offered. Seeing the mutinous glint in Honor’s eyes, he sighed. “That’s the best I can do for now, Honor. She broke the law. Not only that, but because of her inaction, the woman I love got hurt and nearly died.”

  “Technically, it wasn’t her fault I was hurt. That was on Tanner and Angie,” Honor pointed out.

  “When we pulled you out of that fucking hole in the ground, you’d nearly lost two thirds your blood volume. If Sherry had just opened her mouth… hell, even made an anonymous tip, we could have found you sooner and maybe….”

  “Maybe what, Zeke? I’d still have been gang-raped. I’d still have been stabbed. I’d still have been traumatized. You can go back and woulda, coulda, shoulda yourself to death, but what happened is done. It can’t be changed.”

  “I want them all to pay. I want every single one of them to hurt for what they did to you,” Zeke replied harshly.

  Reaching out to touch his face, Honor shook her head. “Stop. Stop doing this to yourself. I’m here now. I survived. I made it, and you made me yours. Concentrate on that for tonight. Tomorrow, we’ll see what Sherry remembers.”

  “We?” he echoed.

  “Yes, we,” Honor reiterated firmly. “I think I’ve
earned the right to be a part of this conversation, don’t you?”

  “Baby…”

  “Zeke, you have to give me this. She owes me these answers a hell of a lot more than she owes them to you.”

  Zeke conceded. “You’re right. You can be in the room, but I do the questioning.”

  “Deal,” Honor agreed.

  “And after that, I want you to get your butt over for an emergency session with Bree. I know you seem to be handling this, but I don’t want anything to hamper your progress. You’ve come so far, Honor. I won’t let anybody push you back down the rabbit hole.”

  “I’ll call her cell when we get home and ask her to fit me into her schedule,” Honor replied. She wasn’t going to fight something she knew she needed. If Bree could help her work through this terror she felt down to the marrow of her bones, she was going to take advantage of the help. “Now, can we please go home? I need to be someplace I feel safe, and right now, that isn’t here.” And that pissed her off no end. The café was her fortress of solitude, and this asshole had just waltzed in and corrupted it with his filth. She wasn’t sure how exactly she’d get past those feelings, but she knew she’d have help to do it, she thought as she took Zeke’s hand and helped her to her feet.

  “Do you want to call your sisters and aunt… tell them that you’re okay?” Zeke asked as he walked to the television and pushed the button to extract the DVD.

  “I’ll talk to Patience on the way out. She’ll do that for us. Do you need to call Jake?” Honor asked, watching as Zeke carefully slid the DVD into a plastic evidence bag along with the post-it note that had been attached to it.

  “I’ll talk to Diego on the way out. He can go over and talk to Jake in person,” Zeke replied.

  “You sure you don’t want to go do it?” Honor questioned as she began to pick up the things she’d thrown at the television in her hysteria. Glancing at the TV now, she shook her head. It was clear by the deep cracks in it that they’d have to purchase a new one.

  “My place is with you,” Zeke replied. “Especially tonight. If Jake has any questions for me after Diego briefs him, he can call tomorrow. Tonight is for us,” Zeke stated softly, wrapping his arm around Honor’s waist as he guided her toward the door.

  Looking up at him as Zeke paused to pick up his Stetson from the chair where he’d discarded it when he burst through the door, Honor was struck by how much she loved this man. “Zeke?”

  “Hmmm,” he hummed, raising his hat and settling it on his head.

  “You know, I think I really believe that I’m healing now. You know… from what those men did to me…,” she said softly.

  Blinking, he stared at her. “Yeah? What makes you say that, baby?” he asked as he reached for her, curling her into his arms.

  “Because, even after seeing myself like I was then… watching them… you know,” she murmured, dropping her eyes. “Even after seeing it, all I wanted in the world was you. I just wanted your arms around me. I knew once I got that… once I got to you… in your arms, I’d be okay. I just had to make it until you got here.”

  Bending his head to touch his lips lightly to hers, he murmured, “You know I’ll always come for you, Honor. Always.”

  “I know,” Honor said simply. “You love me.”

  “I do,” Zeke confirmed. “With every single breath I take, Kitten.”

  “I know that, too. Because it’s the same way I love you.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  August 19, 2016 – The McKinnon House

  2:45 am

  Honor

  “No, please. Please stop! Somebody, help! Help me!” Honor begged, straining against the unforgiving hands pinning her down.

  “Stay still, Peach, ain’t nobody comin’ for you,” a smooth voice hissed against her cheek as another man laughed at her pain.

  “Say meow, Kitty, Kitty,” another deep voice growled against her ear. “C’mon, say it! SAY! IT” he roared.

  “I’m sorry! I didn’t want to do it! Don’t cry. Please stop crying,” a third voice whimpered from somewhere close.

  “Shut the fuck up, puta,” a fourth voice snarled. “Shut up and take that cock like a fuckin’ cunt should!”

  “Fuck yeah, give it to her, man. Teach that bitch how a real woman takes it,” another chilling voice cheered as pain ripped through her belly as the man behind her thrust deeper, shoving her body into the cracked dirt.

  “Oh, God, just kill me,” she begged as whoever currently hurt her roughly withdrew from her used body and flipped her on to her back.

  “Not quite yet, Little Kitty,” the one she’d come to know as the harshest of the men hurting her snarled as he gripped her throat, squeezing it until she began to see stars. “Not just yet. I haven’t heard you purr yet,” he continued before biting her shoulder violently.

  “Please! End this! Kill me,” she screamed a split second before she felt the searing thrust of a knife slide into her belly.

  “Honor, baby, wake up!” she heard someone shouting. “You’re safe, Kitten. It’s a dream. Open your eyes!”

  Sweating and shaking, Honor’s shrill scream echoed in the darkened bedroom as she jerked upright in bed, her hands raised in front of her to defend herself against her invisible attackers. “Oh, God,” she gasped, pushing a sweaty hank of hair off her face before running a trembling hand down her throat. “Zeke?” she whimpered as she felt him shifting in the bed, fumbling for the lamp on his side of the bed.

  “I’m here, Kitten,” she heard his rich voice soothe deeply. “You aren’t alone. I’m just huntin’ the damn light switch on this lamp,” he grunted through the darkness as she heard his hand searching for the switch.

  “We need to invest in one of the clapper things we saw on TV. Especially if I’m gonna wake us like this every night,” she muttered, still straining to pull air into her lungs.

  “Definitely something to think about,” she heard Zeke mumble a second before he located the little button on the base of the lamp. “Ah ha! Found it!” he announced as light suddenly flooded the previously blackened bedroom.

  Blinking as the glow of the lamp brightened the room, Honor was relieved when the elephant that had been sitting on her chest found a better place to go. Turning her head toward Zeke, her heart skipped a beat when she saw the three dark red welts on his neck. “No,” she moaned, her hand automatically lifting to brush her fingertips lightly over the claw marks she knew she was responsible for putting there. “Zeke, I’m so…”

  “Baby, if you apologize, you and I are gonna have a problem,” Zeke cut her off abruptly with a shake of his head.

  “I hurt you. Again.” Hanging her head in shame, she dropped her hand from his injured skin.

  “Bullshit. I didn’t even feel it,” he growled, putting a finger under her chin and lifting her head. “Don’t you ever bow your head like a beaten dog. You keep that chin up. You’ve got nothing to be ashamed or sorry for. It was an accident, and I’m a big boy.”

  “I can’t keep doing stuff like this to you,” she denied, shaking her head as she tossed the covers back and made to get out of bed. God, she couldn’t believe she’d struck out at him again. That was three times in the last two weeks. So far, she’d given him a black eye, a split lip, and now a scratched up neck. People were going to start thinking he was in an abusive relationship at this rate. Throwing her legs over the side of the bed, she murmured, “Maybe we should sleep separately until I get a handle on these nightmares.”

  Catching her by the back of her nightgown, Zeke pulled her back in bed when she would have made a break for it. Looking at him over her shoulder when her butt landed back on the bed, she could see the thunderclouds gathering in his eyes and immediately knew she’d ticked her future husband off and mentally kicked herself for it. It’s not like she wanted to leave him. She didn’t. Far from it. She loved going to bed in his arms at night and waking up being held by him in the mornings. It was these stupid nightmares in the middle of the night that were spo
iling things for them. “Don’t be angry at me,” she said a little defensively. “I’m just trying to do what’s best for you. You can’t keep walking around the station looking like I’m beating the tar out of you, Ezekiel. People are gonna start gossiping.”

  “To hell with the busybodies with nothing better to do than stir up shit, Honor. I’ll be damned after six years of being so in love with you that I couldn’t see straight that I’ll give up the joy of having you in my arms for a single second let alone a whole night. Screw that. Your place is by my side. Always. I don’t give a shit if you give me two black eyes and a fat lip every night of our lives from now until the Almighty calls me home. We sleep together. End of damn story.”

  Honor’s lips twitched at the disgruntled expression on his face. “Now, honey…”

  “No,” he denied flatly, shaking his head. “Don’t ‘Now, honey’ me. Being sweet isn’t going to get you your way. Not about this. Give you anything you wanted, Honor. Believe that. But I won’t do anything that puts distance between us. Especially now. We’re not going backwards, baby. We struggle through this shit together. If things get hard, we fight harder. That’s just how it’s gotta be. Otherwise, I run the risk of losing you to the memories and I won’t do that. Lost enough time with the woman I love. Won’t lose any more. We’ve both lost e-fuckin-nough.”

  Honor looked into Zeke’s determined eyes for a long minute. Lord, if their kids were even a tenth as stubborn as their daddy proved he could be on a regular basis, she was doomed to a life filled of constant battles and bargains. “You’re very lucky that I happen to agree with the spirit of what you’re saying because, you’re right; we have both lost enough. Otherwise, we’d probably be having a discussion about the highhanded decrees that you’ve been making. Fortunately for you, however, I don’t want to let those bastards that already stole so much take another moment from either of us. That includes the moments I spend sleeping at your side. But I don’t want to keep striking out at you. I can’t,” she said softly, eying his neck. Thankfully, she hadn’t drawn blood, but the scratches still looked red and inflamed. “Seeing those marks on you… those marks that I put there…it hurts my heart, Zeke.”