Out of the Ashes
Page 32
Hurt pierced my heart.
“It was his decision to mate me, not yours.”
Ezah’s chuckle was unnerving. “You have no inkling about what has happened because of your mating.”
I swallowed. “What are you talking about?”
“Kol mated you,” he acknowledged with a jerk of his head. “But do you know at what cost?”
A veil of wariness wrapped around me.
“No,” I spoke softly. “What did it cost for Kol to mate me?”
“His intention to another,” Ezah practically spat.
I stumbled back as if he struck me.
“You’re lying,” I whispered. “He wasn’t intended to another. He would have told me so; he—”
“He said what you wanted to hear,” Ezah cut me off with a growl. “You’re smaller than our females, no doubt … tighter, too. He wouldn’t need much more persuading than that to claim you.”
My stomach churned.
“You’re disgusting!” I managed to say with firmness.
Ezah’s face hardened, but he had a sadistic grin on his face that told me he enjoyed the emotional pain he was inflicting on me more than he was letting on. At least, I thought so; there were moments where he looked unsure, but of what, I did not know.
“The knowledge that my brother was to mate another burns you?” he asked, his brows raised. “It must hurt more to hear that Kol never wanted a noble mating and once told me he’d mate any commoner to get out of it.”
Pain and self-doubt laced around my cracking heart.
“You’re lying, Ezah,” I whispered. “I can feel how he feels for me when I’m with him.”
Ezah’s booming laughter startled me.
“We can seal off our minds to our mates if we choose, and we can project to them any thought that we choose … so what makes you think we cannot project feelings, too?”
I froze and looked up at Ezah, whose brow was raised in question as he awaited my answer.
“I … I …”
“You were available, little one,” he rumbled. “You were convenient, and something new to play with. That is all.”
My breathing became laboured even though I was standing still.
“Maji mate for life,” I said, my body beginning to involuntarily shake. “Why would he choose me if he would have to keep me for life?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Ezah snorted. “Sex, dumb human. Exotic sex.”
It took every ounce of strength I had not to burst into tears there and then.
“Do not fret, my sister-in-mate,” he sneered. “Kol will make you a fine mate. He is a strong male, and I’m sure he will really develop love for you after spending a few decades with you.”
My lower lip was wobbling, so I locked it between my teeth.
“That’s not enough for you, is it?” Ezah asked as he began to circle me. “You cannot move beyond Kol’s lies and deceit … can you?”
No.
I squeezed my eyes. “You’re lying!”
“If you really believe that, little one, go back to your welcoming gathering and have a wonderful time with my siblings. I’ll not keep you a moment longer.”
I looked up at Ezah, hoping I’d see some truth on his handsome face, but all I saw was ugliness spilling over from his blackened heart.
“You asked—”
“I didn’t ask for any of this!” I stated, my voice finally breaking. “All I wanted was to be left alone! When I woke up on the Ebony, I just wanted to be left alone.”
Ezah came to a stop and towered over me. “If you want to leave Ealra, I will help you.”
Sickness swirled in my abdomen.
“Wh-what?”
“I can get you to the human planet Terra,” he said with assertiveness.
“But Kol—”
“Go and ask him if what I have said is truth or lies.” Ezah gestured me away with his hand. “Go and seek the knowledge of my words, and when you find them, I will still be here with my offer standing.”
I backed away from him slowly.
“Go, Nova.” He laughed, the sound echoing through the halls. “Do not be afraid; you already know what I say is the truth.”
I turned and ran down the staircase and back in the direction we came from with one thing on my mind.
Confronting Kol.
I had no idea how I managed to do it, but I found my way back to the Revered Father’s living area. Then with strength I didn’t know my tired body could possess, I pushed the doors of the room open, and my entrance snagged everyone’s immediate attention.
“Nova,” Kol said, crossing the room to me instantly when his eyes landed on my form. “What is—”
“Were you intended to mate a Maji?” I cut him off, my chest rising and falling as I caught my breath.
My heart slammed into my chest, and my stomach was tight with apprehension.
Kol’s eyes widened. “What brought this conversation—”
“Kol!” I angrily cut him off again. “Were you intended to mate a Maji before you met me?”
His eyes, which were glowing, couldn’t hold contact with mine, and I felt my stomach drop.
“Almighty,” I whispered.
Kol reached for me but dropped his hand when I tensed.
“Answer my question,” I demanded of him, though I had an awful feeling I already knew what the answer was. “Answer it out loud.”
He remained silent.
“Answer me!” I screamed.
“Nova—”
“Don’t touch me!” I cried, stumbling back from him when he reached for me once more. “Ezah said you were supposed to mate a female. Is that true, Kol? Don’t you dare fucking lie to me!”
His eyes were wild.
“Yes,” he choked out after what felt like an entirety of silence. “I gave my verbal intention to another, but you must allow me to explain why.”
Kol was intended to another female, but he had mated me instead because his body liked me better. That was all that ran through my mind. His body liked me, and that was the only reason I was by his side.
“I feel sick,” I said, my hands clutching my stomach.
“Forgive me,” he pleaded desperately. “I feel your pain, and I wish to take it away. Let me explain.”
“How can you explain away that you were promised to someone else?” I bellowed, my eyes filling with tears. “You fucking lied to me. Again. All you do is lie to me. Over, and over, and over. I am a fool. You are in my life seven days, and look how many times you have lied to me. Look how many times you have lied over life-changing things!”
“My Nova—”
“Never,” I growled. “Never call me yours ever again.”
“You are mine,” he replied, his voice firm but his expression lost.
“Am I yours like when you said I was your only one?” I questioned with a humourless laugh.
My laughter quickly dried up, and my lower lip wobbled as gut-wrenching pain began to stab at my chest.
“You told me I was your one!” I stated as I shot forward into his space and smacked my fists against his chest. “You told me I was your heart! You told me I was your fated mate!”
Sharp intakes of breath sounded around the room.
“You are my heart, shiva,” Kol stressed, emotion filling his voice. “You are my fated mate. Just look at my eyes. They glow for you!”
“They are true fated mates?” I heard a female voice gasp with surprise, but I ignored whoever it was.
I shook my head. “I don’t believe a word you say or have ever said to me!”
A wave of helpless expressions crossed over Kol’s face, but anger was the one to settle when I made a move to turn and walk away from him. He shot forward, grabbed hold of my arms, and held me tightly. He was shaking, I could feel his body tremble against mine, but I didn’t allow myself to be concerned for him. I wanted to get away from him. Far away as Ezah could get me.
To Terra.
“Let me go!” I demanded.
“I need to be away from you right now; I need to think without looking at you, without feeling you or fucking hearing you.”
“No,” Kol growled, his hold tightening.
I struggled harder. “I’m not Maji. You can’t just dominate me and expect me to heel to you.”
“Shiva—”
“Just stop!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “If you don’t let me go, I swear I’ll hate you for as long as I live!”
More sharp intakes of breath filled the room.
Kol instantly released me, and when I moved towards the doorway, I said, “Do not come near me. Give me the space I deserve.”
I turned and fled the room before he could speak or do anything about it. I heard him roar, and then there was loud commotion and a hell of a lot of growling and snarling, but I blocked it all out and ran. I ran all the way back to Ezah and found him leaning against the wall next to the staircase, right where I left him.
“You were right,” I blurted, my hands wrapped around myself. “About everything.”
I expected to see a satisfied grin on Ezah’s face, but I didn’t. What I saw looked an awful lot like … pity.
“Maybe you should—”
“You said you could get me to Terra,” I cut him off, panicked he changed his mind.
He licked his lower lip. “I can.”
“Then I want to go,” I said, hugging myself tighter. “I want to go right now.”
“Nova—”
“Please, Ezah,” I pleaded, helplessness consuming me. “Please, take me away from here.”
He regarded me with a look that was definitely one of pity, but when he jerked his head in a nod, I knew he was agreeing to do what he offered, and what I pleaded for. He would take me away from Kol, the people, Ealra … and he would bring me to Terra and back to my people. For once in my entire life, the knowledge that I was purposely going somewhere to be surrounded by humans didn’t scare me. I felt nothing other than the pain that Kol’s lies and deceit had inflicted.
Seven days … That was all it took for him to break me.
Once Ezah agreed to help me escape to Terra, he turned into a fierce male on a mission. He decided that right then and there was when we would leave while his family was distracted with Kol in his father’s living area. He didn’t allow me to bring a single thing with me, and all this suited me fine. I didn’t need anything. I wanted to be gone from Ealra, and I wanted it immediately.
We exited the palace a hell of a lot quicker than I thought possible, but as Ezah had grown up within the solid gold walls, he knew every shortcut imaginable, and he used that to our advantage.
“We have minutes,” he muttered lowly as we briskly walked by two guards who were bowing to either Ezah or both of us. “Once Kol realises you’re gone, and I am nowhere to be found, an alarm will sound and every patrolling warrior will be on high alert and searching for us. He will try to reach you mentally, but block him out.”
I gaped at him. “He never taught me how.”
“My father said he imagines a wall, and that puts a blockage from my mother hearing his thoughts, or projecting hers to him.”
I felt sick to my stomach with worry in case I failed with the blocking thing, but I imagined a large wall in my mind, and tried to focus on it. I felt even sicker as we neared a death vehicle. I didn’t hesitate like I thought I would have. Instead, I jumped into the front passenger seat and remained still as Ezah climbed into the driver’s seat and started the engine. I held my breath as the seat closed in around me, but when I realised it wasn’t going to crush me, I relaxed.
Ezah pulled out of the vehicle’s parking space, and within seconds, we were driving so fast, it made my stomach lurch in what felt like slow motion. We left the palace, and everyone in it, behind in a matter of seconds. I flung my hand over my eyes and wished for the journey to get wherever we were going to end.
Three or so minutes after entering the vehicle, it returned to sitting idle, and I was stumbling out of it, clutching my stomach before I vomited up my its contents. Ezah didn’t give me a moment to gather my bearings; he came to my side, gripped my arm, and pulled me towards a … spacecraft. A small spacecraft but definitely one that could do the job and get me to Terra.
“Move quicker,” he scowled.
I threw a glance over my shoulder and saw the lit-up palace off in the distance.
“I have been moving quicker,” I snapped at him, with my mouth with the back of my hand. “I’m lightheaded and feel like I’m going to be sick again. You drove too fast, and my body cannot handle it.”
“Because you’re weak!” he growled.
I surprised us both when I smacked him as hard as I could across his chest with my free hand, and for a moment, he paused mid stride, looked down at his chest then at me, and he did something that astonished me. He smiled and followed it up with a gruff laugh. Two things I would never have thought him capable of.
“I cannot believe you just struck me,” he said, shaking his head in clear amusement.
I didn’t get a chance to reply before he had us both moving towards the spacecraft once again. I came to a stop when he released me and jogged over to a closed control panel at the base of the craft’s hull. He placed his palm on the panel cover, and I wasn’t surprised to see that it opened. Ezah was a prince; he probably has clearance for everything. I stared at the craft when a hissing noise sounded just before a ramp lowered.
“Get aboard,” Ezah ordered. “I can hear guards approach on their patrol.”
I hustled forward.
“This is so unreal,” I said as I ushered up the ramp and came to a stop in the middle of the craft’s small bridge. “This is seriously crazy, Ezah. Are you sure you can fly this thing?”
I knew engines, not pilot controls, so if anything went wrong, I would be absolutely no use to Ezah. He grunted as he jogged up the ramp, and cleared it just before it closed behind him. It clicked shut with a bang, and it made me feel like what was happening was very final.
“Who do you think taught Kol how to pilot?” Ezah asked me, distracting me from the doubt that slithered into my mind. “He is not the only prince who holds the rank of shipmaster. He just won father’s favour to lead the mission to Earth on the Ebony to retrieve your females.”
I stood idle as Ezah moved about the narrow bridge—flipping switches, pressing buttons, and turning dials—before he sat on one of two large seats in front of a huge control panel. He nodded at the spare seat, so I moved forward and took it without hesitation. As soon as I sat down, the seat moulded to my body shape and locked me in place. The same thing happened to Ezah; only his chair moved with him as he tapped on a clear screen next to him. I gasped when writing I had never seen before filled the screen, along with diagrams showing different levels of what I assumed could be fuel for the craft.
I had no idea; I was just guessing about what Ezah was doing because if I didn’t think about what he was doing, I’d think about what I was doing, and I couldn’t allow myself to give in to doubt. Kol lied to me one too many times, and this final lie, about him being promised to another, was my tipping point. I wasn’t meant to be loved or to love in return. I was meant to be on my own … nothing could truly hurt me when I had no one to care about.
“Hold on,” Ezah suddenly said as the craft roared to life. “Ascent is green.”
I frantically looked left to right for handles, but there was nothing for me to grab.
“Hold fucking what?” I screeched.
Ezah laughed. “The rest of your stomach contents.”
I was sucked backward against my seat as the craft suddenly lurched forward and flew down what looked like a wasteland through the viewing pane, but Ezah quickly pulled on a control handle that lifted the nose of the craft and took us up into the air. It was only then, as we ascended towards the heavens, that I realised I wasn’t breathing. I greedily sucked air into my lungs and groaned when a dizzy spell struck and caused my eyes to roll back.
“Nearly th
ere,” I heard Ezah say, his voice rough. “One more minute until we leave atmo.”
Ezah’s voice fell away, and I felt like my body was swaying from left to right, but when I lazily blinked open my eyes, I saw that while my chair was perfectly still, it was the craft that was moving left to right. I gasped when the view through the viewing pane changed, and I was not looking up at space; I was now entering it.
I jerked my gaze to Ezah.
“Did I pass out?” I asked him, my breathing laboured as I took slow, deep breaths.
“Yes,” he griped. “You missed a transmission from Kol.”
I froze. “He knows?”
“He knows.” Ezah confirmed. “He is also coming after us.”
I felt like I would be sick.
“Ezah, I don’t want to go back.”
“I know,” he growled. “I told him that, but he was not rational enough to do much more than tell me, in detail, how he would kill me.”
I stayed mute, my throat suddenly unable to form words.
“He has reached the edge,” Ezah continued. “My father informed me I was to be withheld for severe judgment when we are apprehended.”
When we were apprehended.
“What do we do?” I asked him, my eyes wide. “Did you lie when you said you could get me to Terra?”
The muscle in Ezah’s jaw rolled back and forth as he tensed.
“I can get you there … I just can’t outrun my brother and the Ebony. This craft is just a maintenance shuttle used to bring our miners to and from nearby planets when they go to harvest minerals.”
I was at a loss for words.
“I … I did not think this through, Nova.”
I looked at him. “Yeah, Ezah. That makes two of us.”
I was so fucked.
Kol would catch us and then take me back to the palace and probably put me under house arrest. I would probably face charges of some sort with the Revered Father and Hailed Mother. I technically aided Ezah in stealing a shuttle craft and left their planet without their permission … not to mention bailing on their son and leaving him to reach the edge over my decision.
“This is so fucked,” I said, and not a second later, I burst into tears.