Daze of Reality

by Molly Barrett

  He kissed the beautiful form before him in a passionate play of forceful yet loving strokes while Caroline gazed warmly at this strong, solid man taking control of her, of her enticing desires. The dark silk of her gown soon found its way elegantly overhead as John progressed towards his own needs and desires as well. Making his way downward, suckling the firm beauty of his wife’s chest, he felt the playful scratchings of her long fingertips upon his broad chest followed by a downward motion along his trail as well. The removal of those dark boxers was eminent as she forced them away, springing him free to please her in his entirety. Caroline could feel his pleasure now against her, and cried out to him, as the two of them became one in a deep embracing storm of emotion.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  John entered the night’s presence with caution. The dim lights high above obliquely splashed upon the waters below as he stood inside the darkened centerpiece of the rusted bridge’s mainframe. His thoughts roamed wildly, but didn’t stop him from keeping a constant analysis of his immediate surroundings. He felt his continued attempts of trust in Devin had been paying off over time, and he needed to believe that tonight would be a continuation of that; Devin’s demeanor over the phone however seemed to be sorely lacking any sense of security. As the piercing winds seemed to blow straight through John’s Jacket, he noticed movement coming from the north side of the bridge and instinctively took cover.

  It was 11:35 by his watch, which he had synchronized with Devin, supposedly. Devin never showed himself early, though John might cheat by a few minutes from time to time, not wanting to be blindsided by the surroundings of their meeting places. Maybe the shadowed mass John was now observing was Devin, maybe not. He could hear his heartbeat as clouds of heavy breath escaped his tightening chest. Bathed in his own shadows, he rose slightly attempting to gain a better view. As he then reached down for his binoculars, he felt the presence looming from behind him. John spun around, gun drawn only to find a gun aiming directly at him as well.

  “It’s not healthy to point those things at people, especially if you’re a slow draw John. Put your damn gun down,” Devin casually demanded.

  “There’s someone else on the bridge,” John quickly responded.

  “Ah, that would be my security. I wouldn’t worry about them, unless you keep swinging that damn gun around that is.”

  “Yeah...right,” John said, as he holstered his gun. “Security, huh? You didn’t sound to secure on the phone.”

  “Cutting to the chase are we? Well, about that, things are, not going so well in my direction, John. I think that I might have been compromised, actually. I have been trying to manipulate the agenda that some of these people in my agency are pursuing for quite some time now. You’re a smart boy; I think you’ve figured that out. What you may not know is that you’re the key now John; it’s a hell of a lot easier to work it from your side than try to stop it directly from my end. I know you want to stop these bastards and their power grabs just as much as I do. I think that they might have caught on to me, that I have been leaking information, though I don’t know if they know it was to you. They um, at least they think I’m working alone from my end John, that’s what’s important.”

  “So you’re not, I was starting to wonder. So what, there’s other agents that share your, perceptions?”

  “That’s not for me to say. What I need you to know is that you cannot drop those cases. It is of utmost importance that you keep them alive. I won’t lie to you; it won’t be easy, but I think that you can handle it. There’s a lot that could come out in the wash with this John, and it’s important that we expose it.”

  “I wasn’t planning on letting them win. I don’t like getting pushed around. I know it will be hard to pursue though. They told me that they basically investigated my investigation and tried to tell me what the results should be. Then they said if I didn’t follow their bullshit wishes they’d reassign the cases themselves pretty much.”

  “I don’t know John; it seems like they know you’re a threat to them, however for some reason they want to keep you around though in whatever direction this thing takes. Maybe they have a trap door up their sleeve. I don’t know. They don’t know that I have figured that much out though. Keep in mind however, the more that you push back, the more they are going to turn up the heat. You’re in a lot of danger right now John, but you can’t let them take control of you or it will get a lot worse.”

  “That’s all very comforting. So where’s my security? It seems like you’re a little busy watching your own ass these days.”

  “Give it forty-eight hours, John. Then I want you to call into the secondary number. Make sure you use the correct codes. You will be given a time and place to meet your new contact. John, you uh, you’re not alone all right; this new source is going to be your lifeline. He ah, he’ll guide you from there.”

  “So, do I meet with you again?”

  “No John, I’m sorry. My number will no longer work for you. Though it might prove a bit um, difficult, you are going to have to work with the next guy in line.”

  “Difficult huh, okay. Do I use the same phone lines?”

  “Yes, for the initial contact anyway, then you’ll need to play by his rules.”

  “The other day, the first phone I went to, well it wasn’t there. Do you know anything about that?”

  “I’m sorry John; I think you probably did the right thing. Let’s just leave it at that.”

  “Shit man, alright whatever. How did they catch on to you anyway, I thought you were using secure lines? Have they been listening to our damn conversations and shit?”

  “No, they have somehow followed the intel trail, tracked it back to me. I thought I had covered my tracks meticulously well, but these people, their power is immense, John.”

  “Yeah, I’ve already stepped in their shit a few times myself. Is there anything else I need to know, before I contact the guy Wednesday?”

  “Just try to keep a low profile until you can get more information from him. You know, I have to tell you, you got some balls, hanging in with these feds, John. I’ve been impressed with your handiwork, and good luck to you.”

  “Thanks Devin. Take care of yourself, Man.”

  With that, Devin gave John a somber grin and a firm handshake before disappearing into the night, one last time.

  John stared down at his phone, and replayed the message one more time. It was Craig’s voice.

  “Hey man, just called to say Happy Anniversary and FYI there’s a couple of feds snooping around here this morning, I heard them ask Ryst where you were. Not sure what they wanted though. Just giving you a heads up is all. Have a good time, and see you when you get back, Man.”

  John didn’t want to even hear this shit. No. He wouldn’t lose himself to his internal anxieties or office politics so to speak, not today. This was Caroline’s day, her anniversary, and so far, it had gone smoothly. Sunrise sex, breakfast in bed, and after their drive through the countryside they were now enjoying lunch at her favorite little bed n’ breakfast. John was determined that he would spend the day showing his wife how much he appreciated all of her love for him, and that he would show her just how great his love was for her as well.

  “Did you order our drinks John?” Caroline asked as she walked back inside.

  “Yeah, I got us both a sweet tea is that alright?”

  “Sure baby, sorry I just didn’t want to leave my purse in the car, I thought I brought it in. Oh, here are your keys. Did someone call?” Caroline asked eyeing John’s phone.

  “No, I was just checking to see if I had any messages. I’ll put it away, heh,” John smiled up at Caroline and patted the booth’s empty space beside him. “Come here, sexy. Let’s decide what I get to feed you for your next meal.” Caroline climbed in beside him and delicately placed a hand upon his face. Their lips touched softly and Caroline leaned into John’s arms as the surprisingly warm afternoon sun poured in through the sheltered window.

  As they drove back
toward the highway, John glanced over at his beautiful wife, who was staring out the window at the last of the countryside. He couldn’t help but smile as he realized once more what a lucky man he was to have found the perfect lady to share his life with. They had been through a lot together and had supported each other emotionally through it all. She stood beside him throughout his young troubled times, even though her parents bitterly disapproved of her relationship with John. The shit had really hit the fan when she ended up pregnant at such a young age. Even though John married her right away, she had pretty much been given the ultimatum of choosing between John and a relationship with her parents. She had stayed with him then and never looked back. These days, her parents would send a card to Christopher for birthdays or Christmas every so often. Caroline had still not forgiven them for hurting her and John the way they did. Though they had their ups and downs, her love belonged deeply to John and she made sure he felt it every day of his life.

  “What?” Caroline smiled as she caught John’s stare.

  “Nothing, I was just thinking about how much I love you, and how I wish we could do this every day. We should try to get away like this more often.”

  “That would be nice baby. I guess it’s about time to go get Chris and drop him off. Then we can head back home for a little while before dinner baby. I’m sure we can find some way to kill the time before you take me out for my surprise meal,” Caroline smiled warmly.

  “I think that can be arranged,” John replied with warm thoughts of his own.

  Soon John and Caroline pulled up to the parking lot of Chris’ school. John got out and closed the door only to be held back on orders of Caroline.

  “John you wait here; I need to ask Jenny, my substitute if she remembered to tell my class that they have to turn in their field trip forms by Thursday. That woman can talk up a storm. Christopher is supposed to be waiting for me in my classroom.”

  “Okay, I’ll be out here waiting by the car.”

  John watched as Caroline crossed the school’s street from the parking lot. She quickly disappeared into the building, and he hoped that Jenny would hold off on the day’s juicy storyline, for his sake. Surprisingly, after only oh twenty-five long minutes he noticed Caroline, Christopher, and Connie, one of the other teachers, come out of the building. Caroline and Connie were obviously gossiping about something when Christopher noticed his father and decided to make his way across the street to the parking lot. John waved at Christopher just as he noticed something was very wrong.

  It happened so fast, the roar of the engine, the flash of grey. As John rushed into the street, he saw the complete terror in his son’s eyes. He reached out to his son, shoving him forcefully to the pavement’s edge, as John himself took the full force of the attacking motor that had been speeding towards Christopher. John’s world then turned to black as the angry car sped off, concealing the guilty parties within. Caroline fell to her knees, screaming in horror, as she watched her entire world collapse, her husband, her son, and blood everywhere. She began shaking uncontrollably, and quickly fell into a dazed and dangerous state of shock.

  CHAPTER NINE

  James cast his line which found its resting place near the reflection of the late autumn’s tree line surrounding the water’s edge. The reflection of one particular tree caught both his grim stare and an appointment of memories his mind had led him to. The tree seemed to stand out as its wide branches towered the landscape of cool air and drove out the beckoning clouds upon the horizon. Its worn roots formed endless steps that guided a path to the reflecting pool that now seemed to be caught somewhere between a cold, confusing sadness and a slight warm touch of fondness in James’ thoughts. This had been a place special to John and him, a place where Dave had inspired growth and provided an imperative need for acceptance of trust and love in both James and John’s lives.

  James slowly closed his eyes and felt the past surround him; the past inside this safe haven had helped him and his brother John in their early struggles to overcome the storms of their beginnings. Those moments still seemed fresh to James, like he could almost reach out to touch their memory. Exhaling deeply, he reluctantly brought himself back to the presence of storms he now faced. He felt as if he himself was being cast once again into a ripple of uncertainty, and he was unsure of where he was going.

  The sudden snap of a nearby branch however brought him out of his thoughts and dragged his self-awareness into action. As he grasped the cold, hard steel of his handgun, James lowered his rod to the thick, leafy ground. Moving swiftly toward the trees however, he soon recognized the figure that had chosen to join his company in this important place of solitude. He gently lowered the weapon back down to his side, and into its holster.

  “You’ll never catch a fish like that,” the voice called out. “I thought I at least taught you that much.”

  James’ eyes skipped downward to his feet as he dodged a direct gaze into Dave’s eyes. He didn’t want the old man to see the misted sadness he had been trying so hard to hold in.

  “I thought I might find you here son; Alex said you never came home last night.”

  “She worries too fucking much,” James replied angrily.

  “It’s good to have people who care about you James. You never know when you might need them. You a, you catch anything yet?”

  “Na, they aren’t biting. I’m just, dammit, I’m sick of Alex hovering over me. I needed some time to myself.”

  “Those women are good at that; I kind of enjoy it sometimes, ha,” Dave responded.

  James didn’t reply. He simply turned to walk back toward his pastime of distraction. Upon reaching his pole, he returned his cast and waited for an uncomfortable discussion with his dad. As he heard his dad’s footsteps reach his presence, he decided he would just try to ward him off.

  “Look Dave, I don’t want to talk alright. I don’t want to talk, I don’t want to ponder, and I don’t want to feel anything right now. I came here to get away from this discussion. I, I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m doing. Nobody knows anything; it’s like they’re spinning their wheels in slow motion while my brother lies in that damned hospital bed. You know I, I didn’t think he was going to even wake up. He’s been in so much fucking pain, and Caroline’s turned into a nervous wreck. Then that little boy, my nephew, he’s, he’s been scarred by this whole damn thing. After everything that happened, Christopher can’t even go home. They’re stuck at that damned safe house still. They won’t let me near it, won’t even tell me where they are. I want to make sure that Chris is okay, and I’m worried that something was going on with Caroline; they were doing a lot of tests.”

  “I might know something about that James, about Caroline I mean. I know you know she went into shock when it happened, when the car hit John. What you didn’t know, well, was what her anniversary present was to John. Hell, he didn’t even know. She’s pregnant James, they a, they were very concerned about the baby so they did a lot of testing.”

  “Shit, please tell me the baby’s okay Dave. Please tell me that.”

  “Well, actually, they both are. She’s going to have twins, can you believe it?”

  James heard Dave’s voice crack, and he realized it was his turn to be supportive of his dad. He tossed his pole aside and hugged Dave, noticing that Dave had given into a mixed emotion of tears. As James wiped away his own, he took a chance on throwing out a question.

  “Dave, do you know where they have Caroline and Christopher?”

  Dave looked at him sincerely and smiled. “Do you think I would let them hide my grandbabies from me?”

  John slowly awoke and struggled to train his eyes on the shadows of the darkened room. He felt drowsy and dazed, but the familiar surroundings of the hospital suite soon came back into a mental view. He carefully shifted, sitting up just a bit and realized that he was not alone; there was a woman sleeping softly on the couch nearby. Blinking her into view, he smiled somberly at her presence. He was painfully missing Carolin
e, but having Kellar’s company had made things a little more bearable. He could see however that Kellar was wearing down, and this damn hospital was wearing him down. He was so ready to go home; the last few weeks here had been a disorienting nightmare. Sure, he was still in a lot of pain, but he was ready to be somewhere more private. He was ready to be back with his family, and he couldn’t do that until he could find out what the hell was going on. He had to get out of this place and contact the only guy who might be able to help him, Devin’s contact. Someone was going to pay for trying to kill Christopher, for putting Caroline and his unborn children at risk. John had grown tired of this bed and of this hospital; there was work to be done, blood to be spilt.

  The door opened quietly, and John turned his head slowly to see nurse Savannah stroll in once again. The light from the door quickly stirred Kellar from her slumber as well, and she forcefully pulled herself up from the couch and over to John’s bedside. John internally rolled his eyes at the presence of his least favorite nurse. She was annoyingly pushy, and it seemed to John that she enjoyed her present authoritative role over him. As Savannah methodically began her checklist on him, Kellar let out a soft grin. She had teased John on several occasions by now by telling him that she thought the nurse had a crush on him and got off on her dominant role. This joshing had made John even more uncomfortable under Savannah’s controlling care.

  “Thank you nurse,” Kellar whispered with a smile after the nurse had finished her routine. As the door closed, Kellar turned her attention back to John. “John, I’ve been thinking about what you asked. I know you want me to release you this week, but I…”