Smiley

by LeAnn Ashers

  I hold her a little tighter. “Is everything okay?”

  She sniffs, pulling back and letting me go. I take her hand so she can’t run away; she was so happy and sweet before I went into the dressing room.

  “My ex, my daughter’s father, has decided that he wants absolutely nothing to do with his daughter, and he signed over his rights right then and there. He was a one-night stand, but my daughter came from it, and she is the best part of my life.”

  She slides back into her seat, and I sit down. I can see that she has a lot of deep hurt. “For the past three years, since she was born, he has made my life a living hell, holding my daughter over my head—claiming he wants her, then he doesn’t. This time he found a woman who doesn’t want kids, so he signed her over just like that. I didn’t love him, but I hate that my daughter has had to suffer through this rollercoaster. I have been wanting to cut all ties with him—he has never been a dad, ya know? He would just hand her off to a babysitter and leave, plus he has been a total ass to me. He would also run off every single guy who tried to date me.”

  “Maybe you can start fresh somewhere new? He signed over his rights—that means he can’t control you anymore.”

  Her eyes light up at the prospect; then her mood changes instantly. “I would love that, but I am too scared to move somewhere without knowing anyone.”

  An idea forms. “Why don’t you come to Texas with us? I am a nanny, I can watch your daughter while you find a new place.”

  She sits up, surprised that I even suggested such a thing—but the moment I met this girl I felt connected to her instantly.

  “I think that I will do that, when do you guys go back? The apartment came furnished, so I will only need to take our clothes and personal belongings.”

  “I am not exactly sure, but in a few days. Let me ask Smiley about it. What is your number?”

  She tells me her number, and I call her from my phone so she has mine. “Thank you so much, Adeline, the moment I met you, you gave off this motherly vibe that I was drawn to. My mother died when I was born, and I have no clue who my dad is.”

  My heart breaks for her; she has been alone all of her life. “How old are you, honey?”

  “Twenty-one.” So young. I want her to come home with us, and I want to give her the family vibe she has always wanted. One way or another, with or without Smiley’s support, I want her to come home with me.

  “Just call me Mom.” I wink at her and she bursts out laughing, her eyes slightly wet with tears again. Bailey is shorter than me, and I am five-foot-three, and she has long curly blond hair.

  There is a knock at the door and, when I open it, I come face-to-face with Smiley. His mouth opens, and his hand shoots out and grips the doorframe. His reaction makes me feel a hundred feet tall. “Baby, you’re so fucking beautiful.” His voice is deep, almost hoarse, and his eyes are moving all over my body.

  “You look very handsome.” I eye him in his suit; he looks more than handsome. If I weren’t sort of used to him by now, I would be on my ass, staring up at him with drool falling out of my mouth.

  He just continues staring at me.

  “I think you broke him.” Bailey laughs and I join her. I step closer to him, kissing him on the cheek. “Thank you for the amazing birthday.”

  His hand slides down my back and rests on my ass, of course. “It’s just getting started, my girl.”

  I smile and reach back, taking the hand on my ass and twining our fingers together. Bailey walks out of the bathroom, pulling her suitcase.

  “I will text you later, okay?” I tell her.

  Smiley hands her a stack of bills. She looks hesitant, but she takes it anyway. “Thank you.” She walks to the door.

  “I really liked her,” I tell him as the door shuts. “She is wanting to move to Texas. Is it possible for her to ride back on the plane with us? She wants to start over, her and her daughter.”

  He tilts his head, thinking. “Nah baby, I don’t care one bit. Is something happening in her life that I need to know about?”

  “All I know is the ex was a one-night stand, he signed over his rights, and she wants to start over, but she wants to be close to someone she sort of knows.”

  He smiles. “You’re a mom, through and through.” He leads me through the house, my heels clacking against the hardwood flooring.

  “I can’t help it, I love my babies.”

  Around ten minutes later the driver pulls up in front of a very nice restaurant. Smiley climbs out first and helps me out. Hand-in-hand we walk into the restaurant, and the hostess immediately waves for us to follow her. Weird, she never even asked for our names.

  We follow her to the back of the restaurant, and I notice a set of double doors. I guess we are eating in private? The hostess opens the doors.

  “SURPRISE!!!”

  All of the Devil Souls MC members are standing in the middle of the room. I look at Smiley in disbelief. He smiles.

  “Gigi!” My babies yell and they all run for me. I bend down and hug all of them at once. I laugh as they kiss my cheeks, hugging any body part they can get.

  “I missed my babies so much.”

  “I wissed you, GIGI.” Butcher’s daughter, Tiana, tells me and my heart melts. I really have missed them so much.

  I stand up, but they don’t let me go. They’re holding on to the edge of my dress and hanging off my hands and forearms. I look back at Smiley, grinning because these babies are my life. He gives me such a tender look.

  Alisha diverts my attention. “Happy birthday, Mom!” She hugs me gently; then I am swarmed by the rest of the MC.

  Trey comes over last, and I fuss over him. “How are you feeling? Still sick? You did take your antibiotics, right?” He got sick a few days before we left on vacation, and I took him to the doctor.

  He blushes, looking around at all of the guys surrounding him. Aw, I guess I am embarrassing him.

  “Don’t feel bad, I have taken almost every club member to the doctor.” I pat his chest and he smiles.

  Smiley has his hand on the small of my back. He has not left my side, and I love the solid comfort he is bringing me. We all sit down at the huge table stretching across the room. Smiley sits at my side, Alisha and Techy are in front of us, and we are surrounded by the babies. “I didn’t know you guys were here,” I tell Alisha, feeling kind of bad that I didn’t know where she was going on vacation.

  “Smiley didn’t want you to know, he wanted to surprise you.” Alisha gives Smiley an approving look.

  I tilt my head back, kissing him on the lips, and I can feel everyone’s eyes on me. When I look up, I see all of the women giving me sly grins and the guys staring Smiley down.

  Oh jeez.

  The guys will get over it. I have a huge habit of babying every one of the guys. I’ve driven to their houses in the middle of the night to take care of them when they were sick. I love taking care of people; it is my favorite thing to do. I like being needed. It makes me feel like I am a part of something. That I am wanted and needed and they want me around. It took a long time for me to find my place. “Tomorrow do you guys want to come over and I can play with the babies at the beach?” I ask Alisha and the girls.

  “That sounds amazing. Actually, I was going to suggest something like that,” Chrystal says. She is the president of the Devil Souls’ woman. “Mia and JJ missed you. You’re all they have talked about.”

  “Awww.” They are both sitting in the chair next to me. I lean over and kiss the tops of their heads. They giggle and beam at me. “I missed all of them so much.” I run my hands over all six kids’ heads. I am usually with them every single day.

  Throughout dinner, I realize I feel more free and open now. I was a bit withdrawn; I was afraid that people wouldn’t accept who I was. Smiley has helped me feel more secure and happy with myself. Under the table, I reach over and he squeezes my hand.

  I think I love him. Is it strange that I could feel that
this soon? But I felt something in my soul the moment I met him. I never hesitated to date him or be with him. It was like he fitted a part of me in a way that I never knew I was searching for.

  At this realization, I lean over and rest my head on his shoulder, looking around at my family. I feel complete and so content right now.

  “Happy birthday, baby,” he whispers in my ear.

  Happy birthday to me. I blink away the tears that threaten to fall way too often, but this has been such an emotional time.

  Adeline

  A couple of hours later, we finally make it home after spending time with my family at the restaurant. “My feet are killing me.” I stumble up to the house.

  “Here, baby.” He bends down and sweeps me up in his arms, carrying me inside the house, bridal style. He kicks the door shut, and I twist the lock for him. He carries me upstairs into our bedroom.

  My mind is heavy with my thoughts. Am I ready for sex? I know I want to take this step with him, and I trust Smiley with every part of me.

  He sets me on the edge of the bed, bends down, and takes off my shoes. “Do you want to borrow one of my shirts, baby?” he asks, walking toward the suitcase.

  “I don’t want anything.”

  He turns around, looking at me, confused. “Want one of your things?”

  I smile, shaking my head. I stand up, lifting my dress over my head, leaving me in my bra and panties.

  His smiles slyly. “My girl need me?”

  “I want you.”

  His smile drops as he gets my meaning. “What are you saying?”

  “I want to take this step, I want to try with you. I trust you, baby.”

  So many different emotions cross his face. I can tell that he is uncertain, and that is why I want to do this. I split the distance between us, and I reach up and touch his face. “I want this, Smiley. Do you?”

  He grins. “If you only fucking knew, baby.”

  I take his hands and slowly pull him toward the bed, my nerves on edge. I am scared; I don’t know what to expect because this is different from anything I have ever experienced.

  He unsnaps my bra, and he winks as his fingers wrap around the waistband of my panties, tearing them off my body.

  Damn.

  My heart is pounding out of my chest; I can feel it up in my throat. My hands are shaking slightly. As I climb into bed, Smiley keeps his eyes on me, and he slowly starts taking off his clothes.

  Oh my goodness. He pulls his shirt off; then his hands go to the waistband of his pants. Yeah, this is really happening.

  I nod, and he pulls his pants and underwear off in one swoop, leaving himself completely naked in front of me for the first time. Holy shit, he is big. I knew he wouldn’t be a small guy, but he is huge, and he is already hard.

  He climbs onto the bed, crawling up my body, his eyes looking into mine. “You sure about this, my girl?” He gently strokes my jaw, and I shiver at the light touch.

  “I am sure. In a way, this will be my first,” I confess. He closes his eyes and his forehead rests against mine.

  “You mean so fucking much to me.”

  Whatever little piece of myself I was holding back is gone in that split second. I am such a goner for him. I will never be the same after this.

  “Make love to me, Smiley,” I whisper.

  He shakes his head, smiling at me like he can’t believe this is happening. He lowers his head and kisses me on the mouth. He is propping himself up on one arm, and the other hand is sliding down my body. I open my legs wider for him instinctually. His fingers gently stroke me and I moan in his mouth. He tears his mouth from mine, sliding all the way down my body.

  I am shaking from my head to my toes in anticipation of what is about to happen and because of my need for him.

  Does sex even feel good? How pathetic am I to even ask that? I clear these thoughts from my head, just as I feel Smiley’s tongue.

  “God, Smiley.” I moan. He tosses my legs over his shoulders, and I brace myself, as much as I can, with the sheets. He chuckles before he goes back to driving me completely insane.

  Between his tongue and his fingers, which are curling inside me—I have no clue what he is actually doing—it only takes a minute before I fall over the edge. He is that in tune with my body. Last night he drew it out for a good thirty minutes, and I felt like I was going to die, but it was empowering at the same time.

  Smiley moves to his knees. I lick my dry lips. “Condom?”

  I shrug. “It’s whatever you prefer. I am clean and I can’t have kids.” He moves up my body, settling between my legs.

  He looks me straight in the eye. “Are you one hundred percent sure?”

  “I want this with you, Smiley.” His hands take mine, twining our fingers together, his forehead lying against mine. We stare at each other, and I am sure he can feel my heart; it’s beating that hard and fast. His hand snakes between our bodies, and I feel him at my entrance. He holds my hand again., “Ready?”

  I love that he is so concerned. I am nervous, not knowing what to expect, but I want to see if I can do this. I want to get over this hurdle and not be so scared all the time.

  “Ready,” I say softly, and he kisses my temple and slowly starts to slide inside me. I clench my eyes closed, waiting for the pain.

  “Adeline.” He stops moving. I open my eyes, and his face is almost white with panic. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Eyes on me, okay? Tell me the second you’ve had enough.”

  “I will, honey.”

  He kisses my neck, causing me to shiver. I relax my body, letting out a deep breath, and I just feel.

  He starts moving again, slowly and so gently. There is a slight burn, but not the pain that I was so accustomed to. Before I know it, he is fully inside of me. He pulls back out and slides back in with his hips tilted slightly, and he hits something inside me. I tighten my grip on his hand, and I jolt at the sudden rush of pleasure. I catch his cocky smile, and his lips trail down my neck.

  I brace the back of his thigh with my leg. He takes that cue to move a little faster, and that’s when the pleasure hits me full force.

  “Oh god.” I bite my lip, my whole body tense, because this is different than I expected. I feel so full, and the feel of him moving inside of me is so erotic.

  One thing that never wavers is the way he is staring down at me, and it’s something that will be seared into me. I know that look because it’s the same way I look at him. It’s one of love. The words may not have been spoken between us, but I know.

  I just know.

  “My beautiful girl.” He settles his head into my neck, and I wrap my arms around his neck. I try not to cry because of the powerful emotions I am feeling right now. This pleasure is a huge milestone for me, and I just realized that I love him. It’s a lot all at once, but I wouldn’t change a thing.

  A few minutes later, his hand snakes between our bodies, and his thumb presses against my clit. I dig my nails into his back, my body stiff, ready to come. “Come for me, my girl.” That does it. “AH!” I scream, my whole body shaking from the powerful orgasm.

  He grunts and comes right along with me. I fall back onto the pillow, trying to calm down my breathing, which is erratic from holding it so long.

  Smiley slowly slips out of me, and he pulls me into his side. His hands are running down my back. “You okay?”

  “More than okay.”

  He laughs, and we sit in silence together. I try to wrap my head around everything.

  “Come on, baby, let’s go shower.” He picks me up and carries me to the bathroom, bridal style once again. He sets me down in the shower and turns on the water. There are multiple shower-heads, so no matter where we stand we’re under the spray. I close my eyes, enjoying being near him.

  I hear a bottle lid open. I open my eyes and see my facial cleanser in his hand. “Close your eyes, baby.” I close them and he washes my f
ace for me. When you think someone couldn’t possibly get any better, but you’re proven wrong again and again.

  He turns me around to face the shower-head as I’m rinsing off my face. Wiping my eyes clean, I look over my shoulder at him. He is staring at my scars. He catches me looking and takes his eyes away. “I hate that you had to suffer, it fucking kills me. I want to fucking kill every single person that ever hurt you, I want them to suffer the exact fucking way.”

  Smiley

  I wait for a reaction to my words. It’s the truth—that’s exactly what is going to happen. I am going to hurt and kill every single one of them.

  Her eyes are wide, but filled with happiness. I will never forget the look on her face when she was under me, never. Or the amount of trust she has in me, to let me be the one to take that step with her. I was fucking terrified.

  This small woman has brought me to my knees, and I am fine with fucking staying there.

  “I want them dead, to know that they can’t be around me or touch me again. I wouldn’t feel like I was being constantly watched.”

  That’s all I fucking needed, and I am going to be honest with her. I am who I am, and nothing can change that.

  “The fucker who broke into your apartment is already dead.”

  Adeline

  It takes a minute to digest what he just said.

  How do I feel about that? The only thing I am feeling is relief. “Good,” I say.

  He laughs. “You’re fucking meant to be an ole lady to the MC.”

  I smile. “Well I am one, aren’t I?”

  “Damn fucking right, baby.” He smacks my ass and pulls me into his arms, kissing me hard on the mouth like he is sealing the deal.

  “Tomorrow, before everyone comes over, do you mind if we go into town so I can get some toys for the babies?”

  “Of course not.”

  Adeline