Courting Crazy: the Green Lord, Book 2

by JG Jerome

  He responds, “I will, my Lord.”

  I continue, “My blood for your blood. My service for your service. Welcome to my family, Cholley.”

  He responds, “My blood for your blood. My service for your service. It is my honor to join your family, my Lord.”

  Then I heal our hands before saying with a big grin, “Most of the ladies in the family have had wet kisses, sex, and have given me a bite of flesh instead of the blood oath, but I just couldn’t go that way with you, Cholley. I hope you don’t mind.”

  He busts out a dry croaking laugh. “All good by me, my Lord.”

  As our laughter fades, I put Eventide away and look up to see a familiar Rottweiler trotting my direction. A couple of minutes later, the Rottweiler sits panting at my feet.

  “Hello, Good Boy. Who’s my favorite Rottie? Hmm?” He licks my face. I sense Wolf laughing at that.

  “I’m very happy to see you. I’m very impressed with how the two of you have been taking care of each other.” I get another kiss for that. “Well my friends, I have some business to discuss with Wolf’s family. Let’s go inside and get you some water. Then we can have a chat, okay?”

  The big dog chuffs with what I take as agreement.

  Cholley and I lead the way with Rottie following.

  Kellianne follows with a bowl of water. She sets it down, and Rottie drinks his fill.

  Then I tell the dog, “Rottie, I need to talk to Wolf. Please be patient with us.” I take a breath and say, “Wolf, the man walking up behind me is Carl Mansfield, the Alpha of all the Wolf Shifters in the Americas. He would like to make you an offer.”

  The Wolf chuffs, and Carl squats down in front of the big dog.

  Carl says, “Brother Wolf, I was greatly saddened when I heard of the sickness you were exposed to with Ronald. I understand from Ronald that you fought him when he was lost in his insanity. I was further saddened when I learned that you were lost to our family and that you had no choice but to run with your Dog Brother.”

  Wolf chuffs again and licks his face. Carl continues, “The young man with the glasses behind me is my nephew, Michael.” Carl beckons Michael to him.

  As Michael kneels next to his uncle, Carl continues talking to the wolf, “Michael is born to our people, and both his parents are partnered with wolf spirits. However, Michael was born without a wolf spirit. I would like to offer for you to return to the pack by joining with Michael.”

  Michael adds softly, “Brother Wolf, I feel empty inside. I can only imagine that you don’t feel right either despite the efforts of your Dog Brother to take care of you. If we join, I am sure we can both be complete. I would be honored to be paired with you.”

  I tell Wolf, “If you want this, I will try to make it happen in much the same way I removed you from Ronald. What do you want to do?”

  The wolf looks at me through Rottie’s eyes, and I feel his yearning to join Michael. I tell him, “When you are ready.” Then I close my eyes and reach inside Rottie to grab Wolf in preparation to extract him from Rottie. When I’m sure I have him, I open my eyes and nod to the wolf. He steps forward and licks Michaels face as I pull him out of Rottie and push him into Michael.

  Rottie falls down, and looks at me with sad eyes. I reach out and scratch behind his ears.

  Carl tells Michael, “Strip and change. Let your wolf brother out. I suspect he would like to say goodbye to his friend.“ Michael nods, stands, and quickly strips off. He gets down on his knees as hair starts to emerge from his skin, his face elongates, his legs shrink and his heel becomes a knee. His arms transform into canine forelegs. His ears move up and point as they follow his transforming skull. Finally, there is a huge wolf sitting on the other side of Carl.

  The Michael Wolf whimpers and licks Rottie’s snout. Rottie returns the affection. Carl turns to one of his entourage. “Markus, grab Michael’s clothing and take him out into the wilds. The place we picked earlier. Take a couple wolves with you to guard in human form to ensure nothing happens with the locals. Let Michael Wolf run.”

  One of the men jumps forward on hearing his name and follows Carl’s instructions. He calls, “George. Kevin. With me.” Then looking down at the wolf he says, “Are you ready, Brother Wolf?” Michael heads towards the front door, turns around and looks at the trio of apparent humans with an expression that conveys ‘what are you waiting for?’ The guys chuckle and head out.

  I look down at the bereft dog and say, “Rottie, I know you’re going to miss your friend. Maybe instead of being alone, you would like to come with me. What do you think?”

  The big dog stands and licks my face enthusiastically. I laugh, “I’ll take that as ‘yes.’ Okay, Rottie. We’re going to eat some lunch here while I talk with Carl. Let me ask Kellianne if she has something you can eat without giving you the shits.”

  Daphne calls out, “I’ll check for you, Master.” Then she bounces down the hall to the service counter.

  Carl stands and says, “I could definitely eat. Let’s sit down. Hey Jeremy, bring some menus for everyone.”

  Jeremy replies, “You bet, boss.” Daphne passes him at the entrance carrying a handful of menus with Kellianne and Johnny in tow as Carl and I take a seat.

  Trina sits on my left and Daphne seats herself next to me on the right as she hands the menus around. Charli sits next to her and Cholley sits on the other side of Trina. Two wolves join us across from Daphne and Charli.

  Kellianne sets an Americano in front of me and a latte in front of Trina as she tells me, “I recommend a mixed meat plate for your dog, Jack. Is that okay?”

  I nod, “Sure, Kellianne.”

  Johnny says, “Mr. Mansfield, I can just start cranking out platters of our Cuban sandwiches. By making a bunch of the same thing, I can crank them out pretty quickly and serve them up family style with chips, salad, and cookies. You can just tell me to stop when you think you have enough. We’ve got enough ingredients for about 200 sandwiches. Honestly, I over-ordered, so we could even give you a 5% discount for helping us use them. It will add up quickly. A 5% discount could save you about $100 depending on how much you order.”

  Carl looks around at his crew and nods. “Sounds good. Let’s go with that. I’m sure we’ll make things difficult enough for you with the drinks.”

  Johnny grins as he backs toward the hallway, “Not me,” he says as he caresses Kellianne’s shoulder. “That will be Kellianne’s problem!”

  She turns and sticks her tongue out at him before asking, “Drink orders?”

  I ask her, “You don’t normally do table service, do you?”

  She shakes her head and responds, “No, Jack. But if we’re at the table and you ask, we’ll do it. Plus since we’re running a tab, it’s no big deal.”

  I shrug, “I’d have a big glass of water with no ice please, Sweetie.”

  Carl orders a coffee from Kellianne and then turns to me. “Well Jack, you’ve helped me clean up a huge mess and a troublesome family issue. I owe you big time. I’m not sure I could ever pay you back for the help.”

  I shrug, “Honestly I was mildly concerned that you might be upset about me jumping into the Rotten Ronnie problem. I’m glad you’re not, because I don’t need any more groups of people coming after me and mine right now.”

  Carl nods, “I understand. No one needs that kind of hassle. I don’t like to have outstanding debts. I think it’s just bad business. I owe you at least two huge favors if not more.”

  I look down at the table for a moment, and then I decide to open the kimono a little more. “Daphne, please go tell Kellianne and Johnny that there will be really dense shadows at the end of the hallway. Let them know they can walk through it with no harm.” Daphne dashes down the hall.

  “Charli, would you please put up a Shadow Veil around this room - inside the walls and hallway.”

  Charli responds, “It would be my honor to do that for you, my Lord.” The wolves look around nervously as the shadows coalesce and begin to swirl.

 
I address Carl and his men. “This will ensure no one outside this room can hear us. You can walk through the shadows without any ill effect if you need to leave and return.”

  “Hold one minute, Master,” Trina says. She gets up and drops an elf-tech device on a cord. She starts swinging it around over her head as she walks three circuits around the room. “All clear, Master.”

  I direct my gaze to Carl, “Before we discuss favors, you need to know what I’m in the middle of. I am the Green Lord. I don’t know if you know what that means.”

  Carl shakes his head, “I remember hearing stories about a Green Lord in ancient times. I don’t remember details. It didn’t seem important. The Summer Court has a Green Knight, too. Any relation to you?”

  I shake my head, “That role was a bastardization of those same ancient stories. These are the important things for you to know. First of all, I use love to leverage powers of life and creation. You just witnessed some of that with Wolf, Rottie, and Michael. I’m still figuring out how those all work. Unfortunately, the last Green Lord died roughly 4,000 years ago, so I’m having difficulty finding a mentor. Secondly, I am married to the Myra Nessus. Do you know that name?”

  Carl looks at me warily and nods his head. I continue, “When the Green Lord marries the Lady of one of the Sidhe Courts, she immediately becomes the Queen of all Faerie. That’s my wife. Thirdly, I have taken many of her guards as concubines in the Sidhe and Elven tradition. Fourthly, the Summer Court is using mind magic to influence the queen of the Winter Court. It’s causing her to follow her eldest daughter into insanity. Fifthly, I’m not sure that’s even a word. Regardless, fifthly, there is a being like myself which uses hatred and fear as his super powers. He is called the Dread Lord. I need to find and defeat him soon. Most importantly, last night my family was threatened by the Summer Court and attacked by the Winter Court. My wife and several beloved concubines have been abducted back to the Winter Sith.”

  Carl shakes his head slowly, “Damn, Jack! You don’t go by half measures. You want me to bring the pack to the party?”

  I nod, “Carl, I would like to have that option. What I don’t like about that is it makes your people seem like resources. Like they are expendable. I don’t like that perspective at all.” Carl nods his head in agreement. “I may need your help, but I need to figure out how to retrieve my family and stop the current Sidhe insanity with as little risk to all the people involved.”

  Carl says, “That’s quite a mess, Jack. What intel do you have?”

  I answer, “Sadly, very little. I know they were all taken back to the Springfield sith. I know that their queen was personally involved. I know my wife and the captain of her guard detail are both being tortured. That’s about it. I’ve started to come up with a plan for how to do this, but I’m still noodling it around. It’s a bit out there. I think where you could help is by providing an appropriately timed diversion. Something like ‘rush the gates of the fortress.’ What do you think about that?”

  Carl shrugs, “It doesn’t quite work that way with a sith. I would need someone to walk me in.”

  Cholley leans forward to look at me around Trina, “I could do that, Lord. I’m the least likely of your court to be known missing as the Sidhe generally just look at my people as part of the scenery. I should be able to get them in the entrance to create a diversion, bring them all the way to the throne room if needed, and still get them back out safely.”

  I purse my lips for a minute as I think through it. “Didn’t Dick-boy report you?”

  Cholley shrugs, “He probably reported ‘a Goblin attacked me.’ Maybe ‘an old Goblin.’ I doubt he knows my name.”

  Trina shakes her head, “Lorn was quite proud of being in charge of the parking lot. He’s a worthless bucket of chum on legs, but I’m pretty sure he knows your name because you’re in the motor pool and you care for my Yukon.” She turns to me, “Regardless, Cholley or one of the Ravens can do the job, my Lord. It’s not without risk, but it’s not terribly risky. Cholley is a bad-ass, and you know the girls are wickedly tough.”

  I nod a couple of times, then I turn back to Carl. “So, Carl. The favor is to assist in Springfield by creating a diversion at a time yet to be agreed. Other than that, I would prefer to talk about alliances. I don’t have a very big court. I don’t have armies at my command. I don’t have a shortage of threats. I do have a shortage of friends. I’d like to formalize an alliance with you. I’m thinking an ability to call for assistance from either side when in need. That means anything from standing beside you at a meeting to battling at your side. We would have regular check-ins, meet at least annually face-to-face, and send representatives to each other’s councils or courts. What do you think about that?”

  Carl offers his hand. “Done.”

  Trina and the gentleman to Carl’s immediate left say in unison, “Witnessed.”

  Carl smiles, “It’s official Jack.”

  I smile with relief. “Excellent, Carl. Excellent.”

  I hand Carl my phone, “Text yourself, Carl. I’ll text you my contact info, and you can send me yours however you are comfortable doing it.”

  Carl types his number into my phone and sends the text. I tell Charli to drop the Shadow Veil right before I hear Carl’s phone ping.

  The veil drops as Kellianne walks in with a handful of platters and bowls. She pulls plates and flatware from the sideboard and sets them out on the tables before everyone.

  She smiles at me and then heads back to the front of the house.

  I grab a sandwich and put some salad and chips on my plate. I’m about to dig in when I hear Kellianne scream. I look over my shoulder and blink to the entry of the hallway. I hear a roar and crashing. I blink to the other end of the hallway and pull Eventide.

  Chapter 21 - Wrecking Crew

  At that point, I see two large goblins trashing furniture and throwing patrons around the room. The biggest one stands only a couple inches shorter than the tall door - at least 7’ tall. The other is about a ½-foot shorter. Both are very broad and heavily muscled. They are obvious monsters with bleeding red hats, grey skin, and long tusks. I blink in front of the biggest one and cut his left quad muscle before turning the blade and cutting his right hamstring.

  I see two things at that point. The big guy is simultaneously trying to hammer me while falling on me, and ‘Shorty’ has my favorite old biddy by the throat. I barely have time to notice she is whipping his face with her purse before I have to blink out from under the big one. I appear behind Shorty and immediately cut both his popliteal tendons. I punch behind both knees and he drops down to his knees. As he lands, I reach around his neck and slice it open from ear to ear.

  Then I blink to the back of the big guy. I find Rottie chewing his ear while the big goblin screams. I place a hand on the back of the goblins head and tell him to sleep. I monitor for a moment before grabbing Rottie’s scruff and blinking to the counter just in time to avoid getting brained by a table wielded by Shorty. I turn to see him spraying his comrade with the remnants of his life.

  I look him in the eye and ask, “Do you want to live?” He gives me a bewildered look. I tell him, “I am the Green Lord. You can keep fighting and die, or you can stop and live. Choose.”

  Shorty quietly gasps out, “Live.” I walk over to him and take one of his big hands in my own. I plant a kiss in the middle of his scrunched brow before reaching out with my will. I fill him with the love of his family, his people, strangers around him, and children he may or may not have. Then I will the flesh in his throat to knit back together. The carotid arteries, jugular veins and all the lesser vessels find their severed parts and reconnect. The flesh closes and returns to its normal, healthy grey color.

  I tell him. “Give it a minute before you try to talk.” He nods.

  I extend my will to his destroyed legs and heal the tendons, muscles, and skin.

  Looking down into his eyes, I tell him, “You have to make this right. You don’t get to walk in here and
rampage without repercussions. There will be a high price for this. Am I clear?”

  Shorty rasps, “Yes, Lord.”

  “Slowly get to your feet. Then set as much of the furniture up to serve customers as is still functional. Then you go up and contritely ask the pretty young lady behind the counter where you should take the wreckage. She’s a good friend, and you scared the shit out of her. If you want to make points with me, convince her to forgive you. You need to drink a shit-ton of water, too. Your body is building blood cells as fast as it can, but you need the fluids.”

  Then I walk over to my favorite old biddy. “Ma’am, are you okay?”

  She shakes her head, “Well, I’ve never seen such a thing! Huge grey men with tusks wreaking havoc in a perfectly lovely little restaurant.”

  I nod, “Yeah, but you sure did show him you’re no victim, didn’t you?”

  She looks at me a moment with a bewildered look, and then she slowly releases a brilliant smile. “I sure did, didn’t I.”

  I turn to the smaller goblin, “Hey Shorty, please bring this fine lady a clean, wet wash cloth and a couple of dry towels.”

  He gives me with a wounded look, “How did you know he calls me that?”

  I shrug, “Deductive reasoning.” I look back to the elderly woman. “Please be patient, he has a lot to do in a very short amount of time.” I start to turn away from her, but stop and tell her, “Don’t pay too much attention to what I’m doing, Ma’am. It will just scramble your brain.”

  She nods at me seriously, “I bet.”

  I walk over to the big guy. I look down at him and wonder how best to send a message to King Saureg. I consider a number of options before deciding on one that might shake the King more than threats.

  I call out, “Shorty, do you have a name.”

  He answers “Maddock Dwarfsbane, Lord.”