Broken and Beautiful

by Ryan, Kendall

  “I read up a little on your company, Mrs. Bishop,” Alexander said, changing the topic quickly.

  “Former company,” Mom said. “Let’s not talk business.”

  “She gets enough of that from Dad,” I explained.

  “That’s true,” she said with a rueful smile. “At least, it used to be.”

  The offhand comment struck me as odd. My mother had always been supportive of Dad’s start-ups and ideas, even though none had proven as successful as the dating site they’d sold during the internet boom. But now the pride that usually accompanied business inquiries was markedly absent, replaced by an indifferent tone that was laced with bitterness. I checked the clocks again, wondering where my dad was this late. Something was going on with my parents. I couldn’t put my finger on what exactly, but things were off.

  Lola leaned forward eagerly, more than willing to fill the awkward silence. “Tell us about growing up in a palace!”

  “Don’t they have books devoted to that?” Alexander asked.

  “They do,” she admitted, “but I hear that the reality is quite different. Although I am a sucker for happily-ever-afters.”

  Her eyes flickered to mine, and I sucked in a steadying breath, keeping my face blank. She had heard Alexander’s and my conversation, and I was going to pay for that later. For now, I tittered with forced laughter.

  “It’s not as exciting as it sounds.” Either he hadn’t picked up on her none-too-subtle hint that she’d been eavesdropping earlier or the man knew how to bluff.

  “Bollocks!” she cried. “I bet you’ve been all over the world and that you grew up riding horses and hunting foxes.”

  Alexander’s mouth curved up, his eyes growing distant with memory. It was obvious that Lola had hit upon something. “I suppose I did. It’s rather boring really. Dinners with foreign dignitaries. Riding lessons. Although I’ve never enjoyed hunting.”

  “I’m a member of PETA,” she informed him. “I don’t approve of hunting.”

  I scowled at this tidbit. Evidently her concern over animal welfare didn’t extend to her leather shoes and handbag.

  “Unfortunately, it’s a tradition in our family. I’m not particularly interested in it either.” He paused, and this time when his eyes glazed with memories, he laughed. “Actually, when I was eight my father told me I was going on the hunt for the first time. I was incredibly excited. I’d had riding lessons before then, but I’d never been allowed to go with the men.”

  It was the first time he’d spoken of his family and childhood with such lightness, and I listened with rapt attention. Alexander’s past was a heavy burden on him, so to see him smile over a memory made my heart burst. I couldn’t help but wonder what might be different if he hadn’t endured so much tragedy and loss early in life.

  “I couldn’t sleep the night before,” he continued, “so I crept to the stables to brush my Arabian in preparation. Anyway, I’m in there with my horse and I see this red fox locked in a cage. I couldn’t believe it. The second I saw him, I remembered all the hunts I’d watched begin at my family estates, and I realized we were going to hunt him.”

  We were all silent, hanging off his every word as he added, “So I did what any eight-year-old kid would do, I hid him.”

  “Oh my god!” Lola exclaimed, fluttering her lashes. “Where did you put him?”

  “I didn’t really think it through,” Alexander explained with an uncharacteristically sheepish smile, “so I took him to my bedroom.”

  “I bet your parents loved that,” my mom said dryly.

  Alexander paused, a pained look flashing over his features. It vanished nearly as quickly as it had appeared. Only one of his parents would have been present for his act of vigilance, and I could imagine his father had found it less than amusing. “My mother,” he said slowly, “would have, I think, but my father did not. In fairness though, I did make one, tiny mistake when I brought him inside.”

  “Which was?” Lola prompted. She was swept up in the story, making her look much younger than her age. Apparently the X effect extended outside the bedroom.

  “My sister let him out of the cage,” Alexander confessed, spreading his hands innocently. “It took the staff two days to trap him, but the hunt was cancelled!”

  “So you were the hero,” I said.

  “That’s one way of looking at it.” He shrugged and sat back in his seat again. “I doubt the staff thought so.”

  We laughed at this, and I drank in Alexander’s full-bodied laughter. It was the first time he’d mentioned his sister Sarah casually, and I wondered if he’d even realized he had done so. He’d made it clear that she was off-limits, implying it would only cause him more pain if I pushed him to speak of her. But was avoiding her memory helping? It seemed a shame for him to forget the happier moments the two shared.

  The arrival of my father delivered Alexander from having to entertain us further, and a glowing warmth settled over me as I watched the two shake hands and exchange introductions. But one glance at my mother’s face immediately dampened the mood.

  “Again, I am sorry,” Dad said, taking a seat beside my mother. “Have you been waiting for me? You should have ordered!”

  “I called you,” she said frostily, not bothering to disguise the recrimination in her voice.

  “I got caught up at the office,” he explained. “We get such terrible mobile service there, but I should have found a phone and called you.”

  My mother didn’t reply, even as her posture stiffened. My stomach flipped over at her obvious resistance to my father’s apologies.

  For once, it didn’t seem like my mother was being delicate. It felt like she was being strong.

  The strange behavior of my parents occupied my thoughts as we rode back to my flat in the Rolls Royce. Dinner had gone off without incident, but her aloof attitude had lingered throughout the evening. Mom had said something offhand about Dad’s work last week on our lunch date, but I’d dismissed it. Now it had reared its vicious teeth again, and I had to figure out what to do about it.

  My father had been obsessed with investing in new start-ups. He had stock in dozens of companies, but nothing had fulfilled his desire to build something of his own. He’d sold partner.com because we needed the money, but also because he expected to build another successful company. Nearly twenty years of investments and ideas later, his only claim to fame was the still popular dating site. Mom had encouraged him, so what had changed? I wasn’t imagining the rift between them.

  “Clara?” Alexander said. His hand slid between my legs as if to coax me from my thoughts.

  Tonight was supposed to be about us—our relationship—and I’d spent the evening analyzing what was going on with my parents. Maybe I was avoiding the obvious. Alexander and I had our own issues to deal with. It was a lot easier to worry about someone else’s marriage.

  “Sorry, X.” Swinging my legs up, I crawled into his lap.

  “Something’s on your mind.” He didn’t ask me to share, and the message was clear: no pressure.

  It was unlikely he could help me figure out what was going on with my parents, but I appreciated that he was here. “I was thinking about my parents. They barely spoke to one another.”

  “And that’s not usually the case?”

  I shook my head. I couldn’t quite articulate what was bugging me. “My mom tends to be a little high maintenance. She was definitely giving my dad the cold shoulder.”

  I shrugged it off and wrapped my arms around Alexander’s neck. I’d been so preoccupied with my parents that I’d almost forgotten that I had him all alone. Shifting, I straddled him, brushing my body across his in invitation. The contact stirred my blood, sending it to pool in my core.

  Alexander traced the line of my décolletage with his index finger, and my breasts swelled under his touch. My nipples tightened to beads, anticipating his attention, and I rocked against him as desire engulfed my senses. He caught the nape of my neck and pulled me forward, his mouth slant
ing over mine as he captured my lips. His breath was hot, laced with a lingering tinge of liquor, and I licked across his teeth, savoring the taste of him.

  “I owe you sexual favors,” I purred, my hands going to his belt buckle to free his thick erection.

  Alexander groaned, his hands sliding to cup my jaw as he held my lips to his in a languid kiss that left me breathless when he broke away.

  “Come to the country with me this weekend,” he breathed.

  Time alone with him, outside London and its shameless paparazzi? “Do you even have to ask?”

  “I’m not asking,” he said, a smile playing at his lips. “I already told them you would be there.”

  I froze. “Them?”

  “My family.”

  “You want me to spend a weekend in the country with your family?” I asked.

  “There will be some friends there as well. Edward has invited a group.”

  If that was meant to reassure me, it failed miserably. “X—” I began.

  “You said anything,” he reminded me. “I said that I wasn’t asking. I expect you to be there with me.”

  “Don’t you want to spend some private time with them?” That was a reach, and I knew it.

  Alexander cocked an eyebrow, aware that I was getting desperate for excuses. “The only person I want private time with is you. Three days apart is too long. I need to know you’re being taken care of.”

  “I can take care of myself,” I reminded him.

  “You can get dressed.” His hands dropped to my hips and skimmed lightly down them. “You can eat and drink and sleep, but you won’t have everything you need.” Alexander rolled his hips against my groin. My sex clenched as his erection ground into me.

  “You raise a good point,” I panted, running my tongue over my lips.

  “Do I?” he asked, his words raspy as he continued to circle under me.

  “Mmhmm,” I moaned, losing myself to the lurid motion of his hips. “You owe me.”

  “I thought you owed me sexual favors,” he said, a devilish smile coming over his face.

  “I promised that before I found out I’d be dealing with your family for a whole weekend. Let’s call it a draw, X, or you’ll be repaying me for a long time.” But as desire pooled between my legs, thrumming through my clit, I knew it was a lost cause.

  “Oh, poppet.” His mouth cruised leisurely across my collarbone as his hands strayed under my skirt. “I am more than happy to be in your debt.”

  He hooked his thumbs over the band of my thong and tore it cleanly from my trembling sex.

  “You know there are finite resources in the world. You might spare a few pairs of panties.”

  Alexander flipped me onto the seat, moving between my spread thighs. “I’d love to hear more about your panties,” he said with a smirk, “later.”

  22

  The country house was actually a sprawling forty-room estate nestled over one hundred acres of private land. I’d been to mansions before, but Norfolk Hall surpassed them. It belonged to an entirely different time and place. Spires stretched to the sky, and the facade had been painstakingly refurbished to approximate the sixteenth century original brick. There was a stable and tennis courts on the grounds. Inside, marble floors, priceless art and polished mahogany bannisters perfected the imposing manner. I felt like I’d been invited to stay in a museum. It was too much to absorb at once, and that wasn’t just due to the estate.

  I’d dreaded the idea of dealing with his father over the weekend. The King hadn’t bothered to hide his feelings regarding our relationship. When we arrived, I discovered it was so much worse than an awkward family gathering. Alexander’s family was here, along with over a dozen of their friends. I’d met a few of them at the ball, and I hadn’t been eager to see them again.

  Particularly Pepper, who watched with distaste as Edward made the introductions to a number of older family members present for tomorrow’s hunt.

  This weekend was turning out to be exactly what I’d hoped to avoid. Stupidly, I’d believed I might get a chance to speak with Alexander’s father in private. I thought maybe if he got to know me, he might reverse his opinion of my relationship with his son. But I couldn’t see how that was going to happen with this many people around.

  We’d arrived so late that dinner had been served already, and by the time I got to my room, my stomach was grumbling. Grabbing a protein bar from my bag, I took a look around. I had to admit, albeit grudgingly, that my room was spectacular. Complete with a four-poster bed and a sweeping vista of the English countryside, the only thing it was missing was Alexander, who had been placed in his own bedroom across the estate.

  A printed schedule of activities rested on my pillow, and I rolled my eyes as I realized someone had planned every moment of my stay here. Right now I was supposed to be in the Billiard Room for cocktails. Tomorrow I had brunch with the Queen Mother.

  “But when will I find time to kill myself?” I asked the empty room.

  Play the game, I ordered myself.

  Ten minutes later, I happened upon Alexander in the hall. He’d changed into a three-piece suit as jet black as his hair. The result seethed with heart-stopping sexiness. I wanted to clench my fingers in that silky hair and feel him through those perfectly tailored slacks.

  “Poppet?” It was more than a question, it was an invitation. A smooth, seductive smile carved across his face as if he had read my mind.

  I sighed with longing and shook my head. It wasn’t fair that he had this effect on me.

  Alexander pressed his index finger to my lips. “Save those for me.”

  “I’m not allowed to sigh?”

  “Oh, I insist that you sigh,” he whispered, leaning in to nuzzle my neck, “and whimper and moan when I’m fucking you. I demand it. I’m a selfish man and those noises belong to me.”

  “I’d be happy to comply,” I purred, running my hand down his chest, catching my fingers on the button of his jacket.

  He drew away and adjusted his cuffs. “Don’t tempt me or we’ll never make it to our scheduled appearance.”

  “So I’m not the only one with a printed itinerary?”

  “Unfortunately not.” He crooked his arm. “To the Billiard Room?”

  “Yes. I was lost,” I admitted as he offered me his arm.

  “I would have found you,” he promised, but the accompanying smile was tight-lipped. He had been on edge when we left London, and I watched as the tension settled back over him.

  The Billiard Room was steeped in the stifling tradition of the past—oak-paneled walls decorated with mounted stag heads and stuffed pheasants. Jonathan occupied the bar, his sleeves rolled up and his attention focused on plying his companions with drinks. The women he was tending to swiveled to watch me. I recognized the redhead from the ball: Amelia. But the other girl was unfamiliar. Both their faces remained impassive, regarding me with cool indifference.

  I’d dressed down for the evening in a sleeveless, navy-blue maxi dress and, upon entering, immediately wished I hadn’t. Alexander stepped through the door without hesitation, grabbing my hand as he passed, and led me into the dimly lit room.

  “An hour,” Alexander promised me. “Do you want a drink?”

  I shook my head. The last thing I needed was to lose my head around this group of friends. My only solace was the absence of Alexander’s father and grandmother. I hadn’t been formally introduced to everyone in the room yet, but as far as I knew, only Pepper truly had it out for me.

  A man dressed in livery appeared at the door, his gaze sweeping across the group before landing on Alexander. He crossed to him, speaking in a low voice that was lost in the clamor of conversations around us.

  Alexander gripped my arm. “I need to attend to something. Edward will look after you.”

  He was gone before I could protest. I stared dumbly around the room, noticing the wicked glances the girls at the bar were sharing at Alexander’s sudden departure.

  “Come over here,”
Amelia called, waving me over. The invitation was coated in sugar, much too friendly to be genuine, but I couldn’t spend the whole weekend hiding from them.

  Jonathan slid an empty tumbler onto the bar. Between the careless wave of his blond hair and his blue pinstriped vest, he looked as if he’d stepped out of an old movie. And when he spoke, his words dripped with the golden boy charisma that ensured him a constant supply of new bedfellows. “What’s your poison?”

  My thoughts flashed to Alexander. He’d asked me the same question at Brimstone, and my answer was still the same.

  “Oh wow, you’ve got it bad,” Amelia said, sneering at my dreamy expression. “Give her a gin and tonic. Clara, allow me to introduce my sister Priscilla.”

  Priscilla flashed me a smile with too much teeth. She had the same red hair as Amelia, but her fair skin was covered in a veil of freckles. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

  She didn’t bother to hide the implication in her voice, but I forced a grim smile. “Don’t believe everything you read.”

  “Oh, I don’t bother with tabloids,” she said, “but Pepper has been talking about you for weeks. Alexander tells her absolutely everything.”

  “I doubt that,” I said serenely. She was trying to bait me, but I wasn’t about to bite.

  Priscilla shrugged her thin shoulders and sipped her drink. “Oh, Jonathan, use diet tonic. Clara watches her weight.”

  I wasn’t certain if there was a punishment for slapping a princess, but I felt like I’d be doing a public service. Someone caught my wrist before I’d even realized I’d raised my hand to actually do it.

  “I’ll take that,” David said, releasing my hand and reaching for my drink. Without a word, he maneuvered me away from the vipers’ nest. “That was a close one.”

  He handed me my cocktail, and I took a deep swig of it, too angry to speak. When I was finally calm enough to regain my faculties, I turned to him. “How did you know I was going to hit her?”