The Riot Act

by Sebastian Sim

  Big still at work. You can call me.

  “My blog article is not getting new hits. I need to improve the photo. Can you help me?”

  Hashwini could hear Euu Ki emit an exaggerated sigh. An image of him delicately touching his forehead with the back of his hand popped into her mind when she heard him say, “Sweetie, I don’t know how to tell you this but…this is as good as it will get. You’ve maxed out your viewership.”

  “But you’ve read my article, right? It’s an excellent piece and it drives me crazy that only 51 people have read it!”

  “Sweetie, you know I love your writing. But you’re clueless about blogging. When you post on social media, your piece has got to scream like a drag queen on Ecstasy. Unless you learn to strut your stuff on the catwalk, no one is going to pay any attention even if you have boobs and buns to rival Kim Kardashian. And believe me, that catwalk is crowded.”

  “Then help me.”

  “I don’t know… Is it really worth the effort?” There was no attempt to hide the boredom in his voice.

  “Okay, I am going to wave the magic eyeliner brush.”

  “Already?” There was a dramatic gasp of astonishment. “You only get to wave it three times, you know?”

  That was the agreement. Euu Ki had granted Hashwini three waves of the magic eyeliner brush. Each wave removed Euu Ki’s right to decline a request coming from her. And Hashwini had won the privilege of the three waves when she stepped in to save his ass during his life-changing crisis of 2011.

  Hashwini was familiar with Euu Ki’s story. Growing up, Euu Ki had had to struggle with a perpetual disconnect between how he looked on the exterior and how he felt on the inside. At the age of 16, he looked into the mirror and told himself in no certain terms that the gangly teenager with a bad case of acne was not the real him. There was an incredibly beautiful and talented phoenix trapped within. He decided he would make it his one true challenge in life to set the imprisoned creature free. So he took a deep breath and came out to his parents over dinner. In response to his courageous confession, his mother swept the bowl of egg drop soup into his lap and his father threw him out of the house.

  That was Euu Ki’s life-changing crisis of 2004.

  Those crises continued to roll in like waves against the breakwater. When Euu Ki served his national service as an infantry medic, he fell head over heels with the strapping platoon sergeant. He made the mistake of texting the latter a confession of love, which led to the decision by the platoon sergeant and his gang to roughhouse him. They blindfolded him and forced a dildo down his throat. A video clip of the caper was maliciously circulated online. Euu Ki came close to slitting his own wrists.

  That was his life-changing crisis of 2008.

  Two years later, Euu Ki thought he had found true love when a businessman he had hooked up with through Grindr started to pamper him with gifts and lavish dinners. It was not till a friend tracked down the man’s undisclosed Facebook account that Euu Ki found out he was married and had two young children. Euu Ki was heartbroken.

  His life-changing crisis of 2010 hardened him. He decided he had been wrong to seek external affirmation. The phoenix within was already imbued with myriad hues of the rainbow. He needed only to tap into his inner strength to take to the sky.

  When Hashwini first met Euu Ki in 2011, they were both in training to become casino croupiers with Resorts World Sentosa. She was slightly put off by his campiness and thought him arrogant and affected. She kept her distance and never sought him out as a practice buddy when they trained for the range of table games. Yet one Friday night, out of the blue, he called her on her mobile phone.

  “Do you have any plans tomorrow night?”

  “No.” It was a drawl tinged with uncertainty. She could not for the life of her imagine what he wanted.

  “Good. Do you know how to get to Taboo at Tanjong Pagar?”

  Taboo was a long-standing gay dance club. Even Hashwini knew about it. “And why would I need to know?”

  “Because I need you to be there at 9pm. I need you to save my ass.”

  It turned out that Euu Ki had entered a cross-dressing contest at Taboo, but he discovered that his best friend, who was doubling up as his make-up artist, had overcharged him for the range of cosmetic products the latter acquired at wholesale prices. The two had a colossal argument. Now Euu Ki was sans make-up artist.

  “And among my friends, no one comes close to you when it comes to make-up. You have the magic touch,” Euu Ki added.

  Hashwini wondered when he had decided she was his “friend”. But she was curious about Taboo and so said yes.

  It was an eye-opener for Hashwini. There was such a blatant display of pulchritude and lust. Throughout the night the dance floor was jam-packed with a gyrating mass of wriggling limbs and bouncing torsos. When the contestants sashayed down the runway, the hoots and catcalls threatened to bring down the roof. Eventually, the emcee reappeared with the contest result slip to make the announcement. Hashwini screamed herself hoarse when Euu Ki was pronounced winner. And not only did he win the title, he bagged the award for best make-up. Euu Ki was so ecstatic he almost crushed Hashwini hugging her. That was the moment he decided to grant her three waves of the magic eyeliner brush.

  The two became fast friends back in the casino. They teamed up for practice sessions dealing blackjack, baccarat and Caribbean stud poker, and constructed skyscrapers out of roulette betting chips to challenge one another on calculations. They shared their sandwiches at lunch breaks and drooled over magazine spreads of scantily-clad fitness models. Hashwini was there to lend him moral support during his life-changing crisis of 2012. It was an HIV scare that turned out to be a false alarm.

  “It’s my rest day tomorrow. Can you please come over to help me out with the photo editing?” Hashwini needed to nail down the date. She knew how fickle Euu Ki could be.

  “Of course, darling. I’ll be over at 7pm,” Euu Ki said.

  Going by past experience, Hashwini knew she would be lucky if he turned up by 9pm. “Alright then. I’ve got to go. I’m working the midnight shift today.”

  “I know. Steady yourself for a nice little surprise coming your way at the casino.” Euu Ki threw her a teaser right before he disconnected.

  The surprise presented itself when Hashwini reached the casino and swiped in her punch card. It had finally happened! She was assigned to the VIP lounge for table game duty!

  All newly-trained croupiers were automatically assigned to the mass gaming area to deal for punters betting with chips as low as $20. Only the best among them would be selected to deal at the VIP lounge for high rollers who bet by the thousands. That was the official policy. But Hashwini had witnessed croupiers who did not match her proficiency being selected for VIP lounge duty. They were either very pretty or had hooked up with one of the casino pit managers—or possibly both. Take Euu Ki for instance. One week after he landed Mr Big, he disappeared from the Mass Gaming Area.

  Every croupier dreamt of dealing table games at the VIP lounge. It was the only way they could escape the madness of the Mass Gaming Area. For some pretty girls, it was also the opportunity to deal for high rollers. A lucky few could well meet someone who could rescue them from the torture of eight-hour shifts dealing roulette while on their feet, and grant them the lifestyle of eight-hour shopping sprees on Orchard Road instead.

  Hashwini took the staff elevator to the twentieth storey where the VIP lounge was located. She was assigned to the Emerald Room, one of 18 private rooms. The pit supervisor indicated with a tilt of the head that she should occupy the second blackjack table. The first was manned by a very pretty croupier from China, Gao Jingxuan. Hashwini had worked with her in the same pit before but had never had the chance to chat. The China croupiers had a tendency to stick to their own clique.

  The pit supervisor was new to her and she was seated too far to read her nametag. Hashwini decided to be humble and kick off a conversation. “This is my first time here. Can you give m
e some pointers?”

  The pit supervisor raised her brows in surprise. “First time? Who bumped you up here?”

  Hashwini wore a look of innocence and shrugged. She was not inclined to reveal that she had begged Euu Ki to get Mr Big to bump her up. It had cost her one wave of the magic eyeliner brush.

  “Alright, it’s good that you alerted me,” the pit supervisor said. “Down at the MGA, the pit supervisors are there to enforce rules and regulations. No smoking in the smoke-free zones. No use of mobile phones. No photo taking. Blah, blah, blah... But here in the VIP lounge, you can throw all these rules out the window. Anything goes for these high rollers. If they use foul language to insult your mother, pretend you hear nothing and keep smiling. If they crumple the card, spit into it, then throw it at you, you will quietly pick it up, smooth it out and deposit it into the card collector. Never ever show displeasure on your face. You will only get yourself in trouble.”

  “But she is lucky,” Jingxuan chipped in. “Her first time here and she gets Teddy Toy Boy.”

  “Teddy Toy Boy?” Hashwini adjusted her tone an octave higher to match that of Gao Jingxuan’s in the typically gossipy manner. She raised her palm to screen her lips like she always saw the pretty girls do and giggled, “What kind of a name is that?”

  “That’s what we call him,” Jingxuan said. “He must have been really handsome when he was younger. But now he’s put on a little weight. Still good-looking, but a little too chubby for my taste.”

  “He’s one of the most pleasant high rollers to deal for. You’ll like him. He only plays blackjack, which is why we don’t bother to have standby croupiers for the other two tables,” the pit supervisor explained, gesturing at the idle baccarat and roulette tables in the Emerald Room.

  Hashwini was about to say something when the door opened and a hostess wearing a cheongsam with dangerously high slits ushered a man into the room. Jingxuan was right. The man was extraordinarily handsome, albeit on the chubby side. He flashed a dazzling smile at the hostess as the latter backed out of the room. When he swivelled around and spotted Hashwini, he beamed at her and said, “I haven’t seen you before. What’s your name?”

  Hashwini told him her name. She also told herself she liked Teddy. The man was a natural charmer.

  “Hashwini, please be kind to me. I was slaughtered like the 300 Spartans last week. There was so much blood!” Teddy laughed as he sat himself down at Hashwini’s blackjack table.

  “I don’t remember that you came last week, Mr Quee,” the pit supervisor interjected.

  “Oh yes, you’re right. Something cropped up last week and I missed my blackjack therapy session.” Teddy tapped on his temple with a finger and raised an eyebrow. “I must be getting senile.”

  Hashwini could not help noticing that Teddy had amazingly neat eyebrows. They looked like they had been pencilled in by a professional make-up artist. She wondered if she could risk a dose of humour.

  “So you went missing last week. Hmm…” Hashwini decided to risk it. “I heard the police are still looking for the ones who set their patrol cars on fire in Little India. Shouldn’t you be in hiding, Mr Quee?”

  Teddy quickly recovered from his initial surprise and chortled. “That was a shocker, wasn’t it? I wouldn’t want to be caught in the middle of that riot.”

  “Well, it so happened that I was there. And I saw them overturn the first vehicle and set it on fire.” Hashwini did not attempt to hide the hint of pride in her voice, although she was not entirely sure what she was proud about.

  “You’re kidding!” Teddy put on a look of mock disbelief.

  “No, I am not. I actually wrote about it in my blog.”

  Hashwini was half-hoping that Teddy would ask her about her blog. But the man merely grinned and indicated that he would like to start the game of blackjack. She suppressed her disappointment and removed the glass cover over her chip tray. When she looked up, Teddy had whipped out his mobile phone and was punching the keyboard with his thumb. She recalled what the pit supervisor had said and kept her mouth shut. The use of mobile phones would never be tolerated in the Mass Gaming Area.

  What happened next left Hashwini stunned. As she dealt the cards, Teddy communicated over the phone the hand on display, then waited for instructions before he made his move. This was in blatant contempt of the casino rules and regulations! But the pit supervisor watched nonchalantly from the side. Hashwini had to bite her tongue and suppress her curiosity until Teddy left the blackjack table to use the toilet one hour into the game.

  “Are you serious?” Hashwini hissed at the pit supervisor. “Can we actually allow that?”

  “Like I said, rules do not apply to the high rollers,” the pit supervisor whispered back. “They bring in more casino revenue in a week than what the average customer at the MGA does in a year.”

  “I wouldn’t call him a high roller, though.” Gao Jingxuan decided to join in the gossip. “He is just a toy boy. It’s his sugar mommy on the other end of the line who is really playing the game.”

  “Why doesn’t she come down and play herself?” Hashwini wondered aloud in a low voice.

  “She could be a public figure. Or her husband could be,” the pit supervisor conjectured.

  “Or she could be old and ugly,” Jingxuan guessed viciously. “She may feel awkward gambling at the casino with a toy boy half her age hovering at her side.”

  The trio halted their gossip the moment Teddy Toy Boy re-entered the Emerald Room. As the game progressed, Hashwini found herself conjuring a mental image of the sugar mommy at the other end of the line. She pictured someone elegant, with Botoxed and moisturised skin that hid the aged veins running underneath. Her hair could be dyed black or styled pearly white. The woman would wear expensive jewellery and tailored attire cut from choice fabric, a reflection of her exquisite taste for the finer things in life. Teddy was such a delightful man that Hashwini could not bear to ascribe him a fat and ugly sugar mommy in her mind.

  Hashwini could tell that the relationship the two enjoyed was sweet and intimate. Teddy would yelp whenever he was surprised by a card she dealt, whine like a little boy into the mobile phone and spout a smile as he received the mollification he sought. He would at times gently protest against the incoming instruction, ask if she was sure she wanted another card, and break out in chortles and tease her when the next card bust the hand. Hashwini began to like the invisible woman too. It was obvious that she made him happy.

  When the swing croupier arrived to release Hashwini for her break, Teddy cajoled, “Please don’t go! You mustn’t desert me! You’re my only hope to regain my losses from last month.”

  Despite her bloated bladder, Hashwini hated to disappoint him. She turned to the pit supervisor and asked, “Can Jingxuan take the first break? I can continue dealing till she comes back.”

  For a moment, both the pit supervisor and Teddy looked astonished. Then Hashwini heard the latter burst out laughing. “I was only teasing. I would never deprive you of your break!”

  That made Hashwini like the man even more. As she sat in the staff cafeteria slurping on her bowl of assam laksa, Hashwini wished Euu Ki was around for her to gossip with. She looked around the cafeteria but could not locate anyone she knew. Although the casino employed more than 1,500 croupiers, Hashwini was close friends with only a mere handful from her cohort. The erratic shift patterns meant that she could go an entire week without bumping into any of them. It was a lonely job dealing table games at one of the biggest casinos in Asia.

  By the time Hashwini returned to the Emerald Room, Teddy Toy Boy had left. There was no booking for the rest of the night, so the pit supervisor instructed them to tabulate the chips in the tray and do a table closing. While the pit supervisor was verifying the chip count at Gao Jingxuan’s table, Hashwini pinched the tracking card from atop the shuffle machine to steal a look.

  Teddy Toy Boy’s real name was Quee Yu Chin.

  It was way past 9pm when Euu Ki finally showed up at
her flat. Rodrigo Santoro immediately sprang forth, purred amorously and begged for some canoodling. Euu Ki picked the Bengal cat up and whispered into his ear, “No male can resist me, not even you.”

  Hashwini dragged him into the bedroom and closed the door. She knew her grandmother would disapprove but she didn’t care.

  “Guess who I dealt for on my first day at the VIP lounge?”

  “Teddy Toy Boy?”

  “How did you know?” Hashwini exclaimed with incredulity.

  “Girl, you’re so transparent.” Euu Ki clicked his tongue. “You were on Sunday midnight shift. You’re excited and you’re grinning so you must have dealt for someone handsome or hunky, and nice. Among the regulars who come in Sundays late at night, Teddy Toy Boy is the only one who elicits that kind of response. Easy peasy.”

  “Is it true that he’s a toy boy?”

  Euu Ki shrugged and remarked with a tinge of boredom. “He’s a natural charmer. I wouldn’t be surprised if he turned out to be one.”

  “Don’t you find him attractive?”

  “He’s good-looking, but there’s no roar in him. I need my man to be fierce. Only a man who looks like he can tear me apart turns me on.”

  Hashwini couldn’t help grinning when she recalled Euu Ki’s account of the first time he had gone on a cruise with Mr Big. They made such a ruckus in bed that the occupant in the adjacent cabin called the front desk to complain.

  “Let’s get on with the blog surgery. I am on the 3pm shift tomorrow so I need my beauty sleep.”

  Hashwini logged in and allowed Euu Ki time to browse through her blog. He worked the mouse furiously, skimming through her collection of past entries and making sucking noises with his lips pursed in a disparaging manner. He finally came to a conclusion. “This blog is beyond help. Close it down.”

  “What do you mean?” Hashwini became defensive. “I write well. You said so yourself.”