A Beautiful Disaster

by Marguerite Labbe

  Doug smiled faintly. “Not a problem, Brenden.”

  “Is the costume parade still on?” Corinne asked.

  Brenden had not been sold on that plan, but Felipe had sweet-talked him into letting it stay. It would be a fun kickoff for the con if anyone attended. Brenden cut off that thought. A chance for cosplayers to show off their skill and creativity? Yeah, people would show.

  “It is. Hopefully it’ll keep attendees in line outside entertained.” If it ended up being worth the hassle for the permits, he would have to give Felipe all the kudos. The man could give him and Dakota some serious competition if he ever decided to run a convention of his own. He was tireless and inventive. And luckily too impatient for the headaches all this involved. Still, Brenden didn’t regret giving him more exposure and responsibility.

  Brenden checked other items off his list as he continued to assign positions and juggle preferences. Then he went over the additional tasks and points on his agenda with his crew and made sure they all had a chance to ask the questions they wanted.

  He slumped in his chair after the last staff member left and rubbed his aching temples. An online meeting would’ve been better, but at least this way they got to get a feel for the space. These people were his core team. People he trusted or in some cases recommended by people he trusted. Meeting with them and getting the chance to look in their eyes as he talked to them eased some of his inner anxiety, even if it was an extra step that took time out of their already hectic schedules.

  He sensed Dakota’s step behind him, and then his strong hands were working out the knots in Brenden’s neck. He leaned back against Dakota with a soft sigh. “That went well, don’t you think?” Brenden asked, striving for an optimistic tone.

  “Yeah.” Dakota kissed the top of his head. “Let’s face it, no matter how well we plan, there is always going to be a huge element of winging it.”

  “I hate winging it,” Brenden complained, even though he knew Dakota was right.

  “But you do it so well.” Dakota found the extra-hard knot of tension and pressed against the center. Brenden groaned as his muscles relaxed under Dakota’s ministrations. “And you always give yourself the expectation that it’ll be a disaster so you can plan for every scenario. We’re good.”

  “Are you all set for the after-party?” Brenden asked, hoping Dakota would keep up the attention while he talked.

  “Yep. I finalized those plans weeks ago.” Dakota’s strong fingers worked down his shoulders. “It’s going to be a lot of fun.”

  Dakota knew what he was talking about, and Brenden was learning to let go and allow him to take care of things. Brenden caught his hand and kissed his knuckles. He couldn’t imagine his life without Dakota, how empty it would be. Dakota was so many things to him, each one vital, and Brenden couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have won his heart.

  “Feeling sentimental on me, Bren?” Dakota asked, his voice warm.

  “How is it you always know what I need?” Brenden asked, tipping his head back to meet his gaze.

  “The same way you always know those things about me.” Dakota slid his arms around Brenden in a loving embrace. “I was thinking, even though things are crazy, we should tell Aunt Evelyn and Uncle Trev before the show. It would be sort of like a symbolic announcement of our forever commitment.”

  All the tension came flooding back as Brenden stiffened. He had not been prepared for the change of subject, and it didn’t help that deep down, he knew Dakota was right. The sooner they told them the better. Then it wouldn’t be like they had been keeping secrets, which would upset them more. But Brenden didn’t want to think of the extra stress.

  “I already know what you’re thinking.” Much to Brenden’s dismay, Dakota let go of him and leaned against the table to face him. “It would be a load off of you if we just went for it.”

  Brenden couldn’t pick a fight with him when Dakota was so damned reasonable. When the fuck had he decided not to be confrontational? Brenden could deal with that head on.

  He scrubbed his hand over his face. “Dakota, I’ll be honest with you, I cannot handle thinking about that right now.”

  “You already are,” Dakota argued. “And don’t try telling me you’re not. It’s simmering in the back of your mind and weighing you down.”

  Brenden grimaced. Sometimes having a significant other who knew him so well was a serious pain in the ass. “Fine, how about this? Today with my headache I don’t want to think about it. I want to relax on the drive back home so that when I walk through the door, I’ll be ready to face the next challenge on our agenda. Okay?”

  “Okay,” Dakota said mildly, and Brenden narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Dakota didn’t do mild. “Don’t look at me like that.”

  “I don’t trust you.” Brenden poked Dakota’s shoulder. “You’re up to something. Please don’t talk to them behind my back.”

  Insult swept across Dakota’s face, and Brenden felt a pang of regret. Even if he still thought Dakota was perfectly capable of doing it if he believed it would spare Brenden some angst. “I’m not questioning your loyalty,” Brenden said before Dakota could snap at him. “If you did it, you’d think you were helping me, and I’m telling you now, it would make me feel worse.”

  Dakota’s mouth settled in a grim line. “Whatever you say. Just don’t you go talking to them alone either, thinking you’re going to martyr yourself or something. We’ll do it together like we have everything else.”

  Satisfied he’d diverted Dakota from pursuing this tactic and the timing of going to Trev and Evelyn, Brenden rose and kissed Dakota’s temple. “I love you, you big jerk.”

  “Yeah, I love you too, you anal-retentive twerp.” Dakota wrapped his arms around him in a rough hug. “Now, let’s go conquer the world.”

  Chapter Thirty

  DAKOTA LEFT the DJ’s stand, pocketing the woman’s card. She was good, kept the energy going, had a sick playlist, and maintained her poise the entire night despite the conflicting and constant requests coming her way. She acted as if she could go for several more hours, along with most of the guest list. Dakota was always searching for names to add to his call list for after-parties.

  He searched the crowded reception hall for Brenden. They’d done their duty as friends. They’d attended Felipe and Trask’s wedding, brought a gift, ate the food, and even socialized with Felipe’s sprawling family and Trask’s closest friends. The only thing that made the affair bearable was that Brenden had not bitched once about being brought out onto the dance floor. Not even for the silly line dances all weddings had to have and Felipe’s family adored. Dakota had to give it to Brenden, and he’d like to say he’d been as gracious, but his patience was fading.

  Brenden was nowhere in sight. Felipe danced with his sister as Trask sipped from a mug and talked with some people at his table. Dakota was certain the man hadn’t moved since he’d planted himself there. Theo was at the coffee bar, toasting another drink with Morris. Daphne and Brett’s son had managed to lose his jacket, tie, and vest before parking himself next to the cake. Lucky twerp. But Dakota’s plus-one was missing in action.

  Dakota scowled. He’d better not be hiding on him. Not after he’d gone out of his way to request a special song for them. He hoped it put Brenden in enough of a sweet mood that he’d want to slip away. They’d done their duty as friends even by Brenden standards of etiquette.

  He paused by their table and searched the room again. There he was, half-hidden in the shrubbery screening the bathrooms, and from the way his head was angled, Dakota would bet all the money in his wallet Brenden was going through emails and texts on his phone. That was another reason why they shouldn’t have come to the wedding; they had too much to do. Felipe would’ve understood. Okay, maybe not, but Trask would’ve.

  Dakota tugged at the neck of the suit. It choked him, and he longed to ditch the tie. Another glance at Morris soured his mood even more. He would expect Dakota to be in on the grand send-off for Felipe and Trask s
ince he’d arranged the idea of a Supernatural getaway for Morris and Theo’s wedding. But he planned on being long gone before Morris and Mariana tried to wrangle everybody together for the sky lantern spectacle. His only wish was to get out of there.

  Brenden glanced up and flinched in guilt as Dakota stalked over to him. “I just went to the bathroom and stopped to check for anything new. I wasn’t hiding from you.” He slipped the phone in his pocket and straightened.

  “You wouldn’t have mentioned hiding if you weren’t thinking about it.” Dakota grabbed his hand and marched toward the dance floor. He wanted to make sure they were in place before the song came on. In the meantime, he would enjoy watching Brenden’s convoluted wiggling. Eventually he would stop overthinking it, just relax, and realize his body knew what it was doing.

  “Aren’t your feet hurting?” Brenden asked as he followed. It was the closest thing to a complaint Dakota had heard out of him yet.

  “Nope, but I’m about to strangle somebody with this tie.” Morris got to wear a frigging kilt. Dakota couldn’t see why he couldn’t have gotten away with khakis and a nice shirt.

  Brenden dug in his heels as they reached the last of the tables. “Hold on.”

  “What?” Dakota glanced at the DJ, then back at Brenden with a frown. “You promised.”

  Brenden made an exasperated sound and tugged at Dakota’s tie. “I didn’t say I wouldn’t dance.” He undid the tie with deft fingers, unbuttoned the top two buttons of Dakota’s shirt, and slid his jacket off him. “Better? Nobody said you had to keep all this on all night.”

  “If you wanted to undress me, we could always go home,” Dakota offered as Brenden tucked the tie into the coat pocket and hung it from the back of the chair.

  “You wanted to dance, let’s dance.” Brenden gestured toward the packed floor. “This is our last chance for fun until the con is over. I am making the most of the celebration. For once I’m partying with you and not hiding in my room.”

  Dakota swung Brenden out onto the floor and bit back the snarling reply he wanted to make. Brenden was being more than accommodating, and that was part of the problem. It was hard to pick a fight with him when Brenden was going out of his way not to. The only damned reason Brenden would be doing that was because he sympathized with Dakota’s aversion to weddings, but he sure as fuck didn’t sympathize enough to let him off the hook.

  The fact that he’d been considering Brenden and marriage for the last couple of weeks was not helping his mood. He wanted it, fears aside, but he had no idea how Brenden would take the suggestion. Especially considering certain people would have to know beforehand. It didn’t help that once Dakota decided on something he was impatient for it now, not in some nebulous future. Being at a wedding and all the memories it brought up increased his testiness. He just wanted the two of them together, no fuss.

  By the time the opening chords to Journey’s song came on, Dakota had worked off most of that bout of deep-set annoyance. How many opportunities would he have like this, to get Brenden out on the dance floor and make sure everyone knew the man was his?

  Brenden looked at him, his gaze going soft as he recognized the song, and Dakota’s heart thumped with a tender ache. Nobody else got to see Brenden the way he did. He tugged Brenden closer to him, and for the first time that night, Brenden didn’t hesitate as he slid into Dakota’s embrace. Dakota closed his eyes to block out all the wedding craziness and concentrated on Brenden in his arms.

  “So you don’t think going home and having crazy sex would be fun? That would be making the most of the celebration,” he murmured.

  “Of course it would be. But this way we can do both.” Brenden laid his cheek on Dakota’s shoulder and let him lead through the swaying steps. Maybe that was the sign he was relaxing and ready to ignore the whispers and comments from their friends and acquaintances. At some point they would get used to seeing them as a couple and move on to more interesting gossip, because Dakota had no intention of ever letting Brenden go.

  “I’ve never had a song with anybody before.” Dakota had always thought the notion was silly, but now he’d never be able to hear “Open Arms” and not have it fill him with a warm buzz of happiness.

  “Watch yourself, Dakota,” Brenden said in a teasing voice. “Keep this up and you might find yourself engaging in all kinds of couple rituals.”

  “Don’t even joke.” Even as Dakota said it, he asked himself if it would be so bad. Dancing with Brenden to this song didn’t make him feel like an oversentimental sap. At the same time, it scared the hell out of him. He remembered how his momma would sing a song over and over because she equated it with the current man in her life. She’d be so full of happiness. Then there would be the time when the songs were silent as the fights built up to a shattering point. When the song started up again, it was followed with her locking herself in her room and crying.

  Dakota never wanted to give anyone that kind of power over him. All unaware, he’d given that power to Brenden. Sometimes he had to remind himself he had that same hold on Brenden, and if there was anybody he was safe with, it was this crazy, sometimes too uptight man that he loved to distraction.

  Brenden slowly pulled back and studied Dakota with a brooding gaze. “When are you going to stop sneering at stuff like that?”

  “Probably never,” Dakota admitted. He never would’ve thought that under Brenden’s cool exterior he had a soft inner sap when it came to things like that. When they made this thing between them permanent, Brenden would probably want all the damn trappings that came with it. Dakota couldn’t understand why anyone would want to put themselves through that. Couldn’t they just announce to the world the fact that they loved each other and were happy without hauling in a ton of people to witness it?

  “You’re scowling,” Brenden said with an exasperated huff and slowed his steps so they were moving out of sync.

  “You’re bringing me around to weddings when you know I hate them.” Dakota came to a halt, but he didn’t let go of Brenden. A nagging voice told him to drop the whole damned argument. As much as they liked to bicker, he didn’t think this fight would be one that would let off harmless steam. He had to stop letting his past tangle him up or he would trip on it. His fears were irrationally based, though it didn’t make them any less potent.

  Brenden’s eyes went cool, always a danger sign. “But I’m not fucking pressuring you to marry me, am I?”

  Again, Dakota wondered if that would be such a bad thing. The thought of being married to Brenden gave him a terrified thrill. And he swallowed back his initial thought that he would screw it all up. “Come here,” he murmured, tugging Brenden close to him and moving with the music again. “We might as well already be married, Bren. Because you’re stuck with me for life.”

  Brenden relaxed against him. “I wouldn’t make you. Not if it makes you uncomfortable. I’m happy just having you.”

  But how long would Brenden be happy with no more promises? They both had to face their damn fears or they’d continue to be stuck in a rut, sniping at each other. They had to tell Evelyn and Trev and the rest of the family. Otherwise they were in limbo.

  Dakota’s gaze drifted toward Morris and Theo, who were snuggled on the bench in the bower and taking advantage of a quiet moment. Their heads were close together as they whispered, and it was a sweet image. One he wanted to last because Morris was a buddy he didn’t want hurt. Same for Felipe and Trask. Felipe had sought out his other half and was trying to pull a laughing Trask out of his chair. The cynic in him said neither couple would last. They were too different. But this newer voice reminded him how well he clicked with Brenden, and they were as different as two people could be.

  Dakota longed to open up to him, to tell him all the fears that continued to keep him feeling trapped. Brenden knew most of them, probably guessed the rest, but not talking about it was poisoning Dakota from the inside out. He couldn’t do it here, though. Not in public. He always did better when he had those crazy c
onversations after midnight when it was just the two of them.

  They came to a stop after the song ended and switched to some high-energy dance number. Brenden stayed right where he was, holding on to Dakota. He grabbed a hold of his nerves. It was past time for a real conversation, even if it would probably end up with both of them yelling at each other. Yelling was better than not talking at all. Coasting along wouldn’t do them any good. “Come away with me,” Dakota whispered in Brenden’s ear.

  Brenden pulled back and gave him a searching look, and then he nodded with a small smile. “Grab our coats, and I’ll tell Felipe and Trask goodbye.”

  Relief swept through Dakota. The wedding was over, and they’d have a chance to talk it all out before having to turn their attention back to work. Brenden mostly stuck to his schedule, and Dakota knew he had the whole evening blocked out for them. So he’d have time to form his arguments. As he retrieved his suit coat, Felipe cornered him.

  “Where do you think you and Wade are going?” Felipe demanded. “Kissy face with your brother on your own time.”

  Dakota stifled a groan and was grateful Brenden was not around to hear that remark. It would make it harder to convince him that now was the time to talk with Trev and Evelyn. “Felipe, please stop referring to him as my brother. He’s got enough issues with that.”

  “I know.” For a moment, pure wicked glee shone in Felipe’s eyes, and then his expression softened. “I can be a petty bastard, and I’m having so much fun making him squirm, but I’ll stop.”

  “Thank you.” Dakota crumpled his coat in his fist. “I’m leaving all further wedding celebrations in your capable hands.”

  “Come on.” Felipe flung out his arms. “We are partying until dawn.”