DIRTY READS

by Scott Hildreth

  In a few moments, the sky illuminated. It was a glorious display of the most magnificent colors I had ever seen. Slowly, the sun lowered itself into the water.

  Together, Navarro and I watched it happen. While we held hands.

  On the beach.

  TWENTY-NINE

  Nick

  “My vote’s for pork. Beef gets all fucking tough and stringy if you don’t do it up right,” Pee Bee said.

  I turned away from the meat case and shot him a look. “If you don’t do it up right?”

  He nodded. “You know, if a fucker don’t know how to cook it.”

  “What can I get for you?” the butcher asked.

  “We’re not sure yet,” I said. “Give us a minute.”

  He wiped his hands against his apron and grinned. “I’ll be back to check on you in a few minutes.”

  I turned toward Pee bee. “You come to last year’s barbeque, Peeb?”

  “You know I did, why?”

  “Year before?”

  “What the fuck you gettin’ at, asshole?”

  “Were you here year before last? At the barbeque?”

  He sighed, and then nodded. “Yep.”

  “Was the barbeque good?”

  “Damn good.”

  “Flavorful?”

  “It was good as fuck, why?”

  “Was any of it stringy or tough?”

  He shook his head. “I just said it was good.”

  “Ryder was in charge of the smoker for the last two years. If you liked it, it’d stand to fuckin’ reason that he’d know how to cook the fuckin’ meat.”

  He shrugged. “Okay.”

  “We’ll get some of each. Fifty-fifty.”

  “Get more pork than beef. Beef ribs are a fuckin’ bitch to get right, Boss.”

  I folded my arms in front of my chest and glared at him. “Didn’t we just settle this? Fifty-fifty?”

  “We didn’t settle it. You did. You don’t ever fuckin’ listen to me. You might ask, but you don’t give a fuck what I say.”

  “Oh, so now you got your fuckin’ feelers hurt huh? Over some beef ribs?”

  “Make a decision yet? The butcher asked.

  We both glared at him.

  “I’ll just…I’ll…I’ll come back in a few minutes,” he said.

  I turned toward Peeb and huffed out a sigh. “You don’t pay attention to the details, asshole. I asked you what you liked, not what you wanted. I was being polite. Courteous.”

  He laughed. “Now you’re a kind-hearted fucker, huh?”

  “Something like that.”

  “So you were just askin’, but not givin’ a fuck what I responded?”

  “Jesus fucking Christ. Not exactly. Are we really standing here in the fucking store arguing about meat? Why does everything have to be so god damned difficult with you?”

  He shook his head. “It ain’t difficult. I ain’t difficult. Beef ribs are a bitch to get right. Get pork. That’s pretty simple. You wanna be a prick and go fifty-fifty, do it.”

  I flexed my biceps. “You calling me a prick?”

  “I just called you one, yeah. You flexin’ on me, Boss?”

  I shook my head. “Just asking a question, you big dumb fuck.”

  “I’ll beat your presidential patch-wearin’ ass, Crip. Don’t call me a dumb fuck.”

  “Dumb pork-eatin’ fuck.”

  He raked his hair from his face and took a step back. “I mean it.”

  “So, did you make a decision?” the butcher asked.

  We both turned toward him.

  His eyes widened. “I’ll be back.”

  “Beef,” Pee Bee snapped.

  “Pork,” I said.

  His eyes darted back and forth, alternating between Peeb and me. “Go with a little of each?”

  “Fifty-fifty,” I said. “We need about 75 pounds of ribs, total. No, make it 80. And 30 pounds of beef brisket.”

  “When would you like it?”

  “Can we pick it up Friday?”

  He nodded. “We’ll need you to pay in advance on that much meat.”

  I reached for my wallet. “Just give me an amount.”

  “So, 40 pounds of beef ribs, 40 pounds of pork ribs, and 30 pounds of beef brisket?”

  I nodded. “Sounds right.”

  He punched his finger against the keyboard on the scale, printed off three stickers, and stuck them to a piece of butcher paper. He handed me the slip of paper. “Just pay at the register. They’ll scan those for you.”

  “Appreciate it.”

  He chuckled. “I thought for a minute you two were going to actually fight over it.”

  “Like a fist fight?” I asked.

  He nodded. “That’s what I was thinking.”

  I wagged my finger between Peeb and me. “Who do you think would win?”

  The look on his face changed to worried. “Oh, I’d hate to guess.”

  “Guess.” I said.

  “I really…”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Guess.”

  He pointed to me.

  “Come on, Peeb,” I said with a laugh.

  “Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?” Pee Bee said, laughing as he spoke. “I’ve got fifty pounds and seven inches on him. You picked him?”

  The butcher shrugged.

  Pee Bee chuckled. “Why?”

  “Why’d I pick him?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Because he looks mean.”

  “He might look mean, but I am mean.”

  “Come on, tough guy,” I said. “Let’s go before you hurt someone.”

  We paid for the meat, and walked out to our bikes.

  “Wanna eat?” I asked.

  “Sooner or later, yeah.”

  I raised my leg over the seat and sat down. After strapping on my helmet, I turned toward Peeb. His helmet still hung from his handlebars. He sat staring blankly out at the street.

  I cleared my throat. “You coming?”

  He nodded. “You bringing her to the barbeque?”

  The annual barbeque was a family event and everyone was welcome. “Was thinking about it.”

  “Funny how things change.”

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  He looked at me. “You ain’t brought anybody to the barbeque since we been havin’ ‘em. Just funny. Not funny haha, but funny weird.”

  I glared back at him in disbelief. “It’s weird that I’m bringing her?”

  “Now you’re bringing her? Not thinking about it?”

  “I’m fuckin’ bringing her. Jesus.” I shifted my eyes to the street. After a short pause, I continued. “She’s a good woman.”

  “No argument here. It’s just weird, that’s all.”

  “Don’t make it into something it isn’t. She’s not my Ol’ Lady.”

  “Ain’t makin’ it into nothin’, Boss. Don’t get me wrong, I like that little bitch. A lot. She’s good people.”

  I nodded in agreement. “Fish tacos?”

  “Sounds good,” he responded. “But changing the subject ain’t gonna make me stop asking questions.”

  He could ask all the questions he wanted, but I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to answer them.

  Because I had no earthly fucking idea where my life with Peyton was headed.

  THIRTY

  Peyton

  The night was almost over. Eating barbeque wasn’t something I had much experience with, but so far I was enjoying it. At least until the argument started. With Navarro on my left, and Pee bee seated across from me, I felt like I was being attacked from two different directions.

  “Just take a bite out of each one and tell us which one’s better,” Navarro said.

  “Hold on a fuckin’ minute. Not which one is better,” Pee Bee said. “Which one feels better in your mouth. You know, texture or whatever.”

  “Overall,” Navarro said.

  “Yeah. What he said. Taste, texture, and if the meat’s all stringy and kinda nasty or tough to eat, don’t b
e afraid to say so.”

  “Just stop,” I shouted. “You two are like a couple of little kids. Hold on.”

  They looked the same to me, and I had no idea why they were having me sample ribs. Eating meat off a bone was pretty gross in my opinion, no matter what it was. For the sake of ending their argument, however, I agreed to give it a try.

  I bit some of the meat off the rib on the left, chewed it, and swallowed it. It was kind of greasy, but it tasted good. The right rib followed, and the meat wasn’t as easy to chew, but it had great flavor.

  I wiped my fingers on the napkin. There was no way to pick. Both were equally gross. I did eeny, meeny, miny, moe and picked up the rib on the right. Pee Bee’s eyes went wide and he smiled from ear to ear.

  It wasn’t what I wanted.

  I waved the rib in the air. “This one sucked ass.”

  Pee Bee’s hand slapped the table. “Fuck!”

  “Told you,” Navarro said. He held out his hand. “Pay up, sucka!”

  Pee Bee dug in his wallet, and then handed him a $20 bill. “Fuck off. She’s not a rib expert.”

  Navarro put the money in his pocket. “She sure picked it.”

  Pee Bee glared at me. “Fuckin’ novice.”

  I shrugged.

  He got up and walked away, leaving Navarro and me sitting alone. Most of the other people were walking around, dancing, or just standing and talking. It was nice to meet more of Navarro’s group. Seeing the men with their girlfriends, wives, or whoever they chose to bring was nice.

  “Here, I’ll toss that in the trash for you.”

  “Thanks,” I said.

  He took my plate and walked toward the trash can, which was up by the building. While he was walking back to the table, two guys stopped him to talk. Five minutes later, when he hadn’t returned, I glanced nervously around the packed parking lot.

  Men in vests were everywhere, but it wasn’t solely FFMC’s men. Various other members of clubs were scattered about, talking to each other or just standing and drinking beers alone. I was seated at a group of picnic style tables, and as most people were walking around drinking, I was left sitting alone.

  I am in control.

  I am safe now.

  I looked toward the building, and saw Navarro trying to make his way back to the table. After waving off a few men who tried to get him to talk, he finally sat down beside me at the table.

  “Tell me the truth?”

  “I’m bound by a promise, remember?”

  He chuckled. “Oh, yeah.”

  “What’s the question?”

  “The rib. The one you picked up. Were you going to say that it was the good one, and then you changed your mind when you saw Peeb celebrating?”

  I nodded. “Yep.”

  “No shit?”

  “No shit.”

  “You didn’t like the other one?”

  “It was kinda weird. They were both gross, but the other one was more gross.”

  He twisted his mouth to the side. “Fuck.”

  “Fuck what?”

  “I’m going to have to give him his money back.”

  I shrugged. “Maybe wait till tomorrow. It’d be more fun.”

  “I’ll probably do that.”

  “Thanks, by the way. I don’t remember if I told you that. But thanks.”

  “For?”

  “Letting me come.”

  “I didn’t let you come,” he said. “I asked you to come. There’s a difference.”

  It seemed like splitting hairs to me. “Thanks for asking me to come.”

  He grinned, but I was left wondering what he meant by what he said. It gnawed on me for a minute, and then I asked.

  “What’s the difference? Between letting me and asking me?”

  “Letting you would be agreeing to allow you to come if you asked if you could. If you said, hey can I come to your barbeque? Asking you to come means I wanted you to come, and I asked you, because I wanted you here.”

  I liked the difference that he explained, but I wanted to know more. There was no way that Navarro and I would ever amount to anything more than elbow-rubbing associates, but it was nice to dream.

  Now that I knew him better, I found him to be so much more than an intriguing biker. He was caring, could be kind, and most of what others saw in him was a hard outer layer that he used to protect his significantly more sensitive inner being.

  Getting through the outer shell wasn’t easy, though.

  “Why’d you ask me? Or why’d you want me?”

  His response was quick and without thought or hesitation.

  “I like you,” he said.

  It wasn’t much.

  In fact, I’d been told a lot more than that from lesser men over the years. But, coming from Navarro, it was pretty fucking significant.

  At least to me.

  The sound of the people, the music, and even what I could see of my surroundings all became insignificant. Elizabeth told me to always be aware of my surroundings, but at that moment I wasn’t.

  And it didn’t matter.

  I had tunnel vision, and all I could see was Navarro.

  I leaned forward. It was a long shot, but it was worth a try.

  He leaned into me, and kissed me lightly on the lips.

  “I’m not broken,” I said. “Really.”

  He wrapped his hand around the back of my neck, pulled me into him, and kissed me like I had never been kissed.

  Ever.

  My mind raced. His beard against my face reminded me that he was a real man, and I liked it.

  Both of my palms went sweaty and I wiped them on my shirt. Passion filled me from head to toe, and a tingling shot through me, shaking me to my core. Our tongues intertwined and we fought to find the perfect spot for our hands to land, but it seemed to never happen.

  While we continued to grope and kiss, Pee Bee’s complaint brought us both back to the reality of the situation.

  “Get a fuckin’ room, Crip!”

  Our mouths parted. I looked at him.

  He looked back at me.

  He stood and reached for my hand.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Come on,” he said.

  The party wasn’t over, and I knew he really didn’t want to go anywhere. I loved kissing him, but making out in the shop on the bench would just ruin it for me.

  “Where are we going?”

  “To my house,” he said. “We need to be laying on something squishy.”

  Something squishy.

  I like that.

  THIRTY-ONE

  Nick

  I had sex for one reason, and one reason only. To blow my load. I had never been concerned with a woman’s desires, needs, or thoughts. Now, Peyton’s desires, needs, and thoughts were all I was concerned with.

  My hands pressed against the soft skin of her breasts. I waited for rejection, but received none. Carefully, I kneaded her flesh, paying special attention not to be too rough. She wiggled and twisted her body, but I could tell by her moans that she was as pleased as I was.

  I lowered my mouth to meet her nipples, kissing them softly with my lips, then following with a few flicks of my tongue. She responded by digging her nails into my back, further proof that so far I had yet to make a mistake.

  Perfection wasn’t my goal, nor was it an expectation. I wanted to please her, and the thought of doing so pleased me. It was a first, that was for sure.

  Before the barbeque, I had an idea of how I felt about Peyton, but I wasn’t certain what I wanted in the end. When we kissed, something either changed, or I came to a realization. As ridiculous as it seemed to admit afterward, kissing her was all the confirmation my mind needed.

  With my body, spirit, and soul released from my mind’s grip, I cautiously worked to satisfy her, hoping to bring her to climax without causing her any mental or physical pain.

  I sucked and kissed her breasts repeatedly, grinding my hips against hers with each touch of my lips to her nipples.

/>   Her moaning continued, and fueled by her expressed pleasure, I continued.

  Several minutes later, the moaning had all but stopped.

  She pressed her elbows into the mattress and lifted her head. “Uhhm. I’m more than a set of nice tits. You know that, right?”

  “Huh?”

  “You’ve been fucking around with my tits since we started,” she complained. “I told you, I’m not broken.”

  Hurting her in any way would crush me. Still harboring the guilt for what happened to her, an extremely cautious advance was all she was going to receive from me. At least for now. “I know,” I said. “But I just don’t want to--”

  She flipped her hair over her shoulder. “Hurt me?”

  I nodded. “Yeah.”

  She sat up completely. “I’m safe with you. That’s one thing I need to always remind myself of, and I do. I’m safe here.”

  I rolled to the side and continued to listen, but paid more attention to admiring her perfect body.

  “You’re not going to hurt me,” she said. “We both know it. Ultimately, I’m in control. Me. Not you. Me.”

  “Okay.”

  “I’m safe, and I’m in control. But guess what?”

  I was lost. Completely. “What?”

  “I want you to fuck me. And I don’t mean I want you to stick your cock in me and gently work your hips back and forth. If we’re going to do this, I want to be fucked.”

  “I just…I don’t want to--”

  “Hurt me? Roll over,” she said. “I fucking swear. If a woman want’s something done right, she’s got to do it herself.”

  THIRTY-TWO

  Peyton

  On his back with his raging cock pointing at the sky, Navarro looked at me with guilt in his eyes. I wrapped my hands around his thick shaft and looked him in the eye. “Watch me. Okay?”

  His Adam’s apple rose and then fell. “Okay.”

  I worked his cock in and out of my mouth until it was deep in my throat. After the tip caused me to gag a few times, I raised my head and met his gaze.

  With wide eyes, he looked back at me.

  I wiped my mouth on the back of my hand. “See, I’m fine.”

  “Uh huh,” he murmured.

  I considered sucking his cock for a few more minutes, but I didn’t ponder it for long. The aching in my pussy was more than I could stand. As a result of him sucking my tits into a frenzy and me gratefully gagging on his thick cock, I was more than ready to feel him deep inside of me.