Loving Mercy

by Dena Christy

“Nope. Logan closed the bar today because of the snow. So you’ll have me all to yourself.” He grinned at her and she swallowed and her eyes darted down to his lips for the second time that morning. His grip on his coffee cup tightened for a moment before he forced himself to relax. This game he was playing with her was a double-edge sword because while he was trying to build the desire for him inside her, it meant that his own need for her was growing.

  A break to go out and take care of some snow was just what he needed. The cold air would cool him off a little and would lessen the urge to stand up, pull her into his arms and take her to his bed, right this second. He wanted her to come to him with her need for him so great that it would overwhelm all her doubts about herself and about him.

  The first time they’d slept together had been for the wrong reasons, so it was doubly important that the next time they made love, and they would, was because they couldn’t stand to be apart from each other for one more second.

  And if he had to stick his head in the snow to accomplish that, he would.

  Mercy watched Alex walk out the door in his heavy coat, and she frowned as the door closed behind him. What was going on?

  She reached up to touch her lips and wondered for a second if she’d just imagined the kiss he’d given her. It felt real, and she wasn’t prone to delusions, but did it really happen? He was acting like nothing out of the ordinary had passed between them while they’d stood in the middle of his living room. But that kiss had awakened a fire inside her and planted the notion of sleeping with him in her brain. Surely he’d felt it too?

  She made a noise of disgust as she turned away. It was just a kiss, why was she making such a big deal about it. It wasn’t like he’d never kissed her before, not like he hadn’t done a lot of other things to her before too. But something had changed between them. There had been a look in his eyes when he’d looked at her that told her that his desire for her was just as strong as hers for him. So why had he pulled away and acted as if nothing had happened?

  If he’d been any of the other men she’d been with, a kiss like that would have led straight to bed. When he’d first pulled away from her, she’d been a little nervous about the kisses’ inevitable conclusion. Was she ready to dive deeper into a relationship with him, because she knew that sleeping with him again would make what was between them more than the casual fling that their sleeping together the first time had been?

  She’d braced herself, had readied herself to put up walls against him if he pushed her. But he didn’t. He moved away from her, told her that he’d brought her crackers and had gone to the kitchen for coffee. And his nonchalance over the kissed had made it so she couldn’t stop thinking about it. Why hadn’t he pushed for more? It wasn’t because he didn’t want her, she could see the desire for her in his eyes, so why hadn’t he pushed? Any of the other men she’d been with would have.

  Maybe that was the point. Maybe she needed to stop analyzing everything he did through the lens of her experience. Alex wasn’t like the other men who’d come and gone from her life and perhaps she needed to remember that.

  It was a scary prospect, not knowing what was coming. But it was exciting at the same time. She had no idea what was going to happen with him next, and with a shake of her head, she put it from her mind.

  She went to the guest room, got dressed and retrieved her laptop case and took it into the living room. Work was what she needed to take her mind off him. Her writing had been the one thing that had gotten her through the difficulties in her life, and it would provide her with a distraction now.

  She opened the laptop and went to the article she was working on for a client. She had her outline all ready, and it should have been easy to pick up where she left off and let the words flow. But the sound of a shovel scraping the driveway outside reminded her that he was there, only a short distance away. The kiss kept coming back, no matter how much she tried to push it to the back of her mind and get back to her work.

  After trying for ten minutes to focus, she knew that it would not happen today. She closed the laptop and slipped it into the case. Why should she sit in here alone, working, when she could keep him company? There would be plenty of time for her to work when he was at the bar. Today she was going to take the day off and go out and enjoy the snow with him.

  She went to the vestibule and put on her coat. She pulled her wool hat on her head and pulled it down over her ears. Gloves and her heavy boots came next and she was ready to face the winter that had hit them overnight.

  She walked out of the house, and he stopped what he was doing to look up at her. It hit her then, with the force of a hammer, that she wanted him. He was gorgeous, with a few snowflakes clinging to his midnight colored hair, the smile in his deep blue eyes and the easy grin on his face. The wall she’d built inside her, the one she had put there to keep herself at a distance from him, crumbled away.

  She smiled hesitantly as she came out onto the porch.

  “Do you want any help?”

  “The snow’s heavy and I don’t want you to hurt yourself trying to shovel it, but if you want to work on clearing the porch there is another shovel in the vestibule along with a corn broom that I use to sweep it.”

  She went back inside to get the shovel and broom, and when she came back out, he was back to work on the driveway. She stood there for quite a while, watching him work. The snow was the wet, dense kind that made great snowballs and snowmen but was a bitch to shovel. That he moved it with ease told her just how strong he was.

  With a shake of her head, she set the broom against the wall and shoved the snow on the porch off it with the shovel. Keeping busy was what she needed to stop thinking about what it had felt like to have his strong male body hold her. Memories of the night they spent together came back to her, and she bit her lip as her desire for him came flaring back to life.

  He’d been tender and gentle that night when she’d needed it, but as their passion had reached its peak he’d let go of the tight rein he had on himself and his lovemaking had turned ferocious with his passion. And she’d loved every second.

  And as she stopped pushing the snow off the porch and watched him bend to the task of clearing the driveway, she knew that there were better things they could do than stand out here in the cold. He’d planted a seed with that kiss earlier, and it had taken root inside her. She knew without a doubt that the longing she had inside her was not because sleeping with him would blot out fear or pain like it had the first time they'd been together.

  She wanted him because he was unlike any man she’d ever met. And he was the father of her baby, and he did little things, considerate things that showed her he cared.

  A smile pulled across her lips, and a small imp prodded her to put the shovel aside. If she was going to sleep with him, she was going to need to get him on the same page. She needed to make it so that he wouldn't pull away from her and pretend that nothing was going on as he had in the living room. And to do that, she needed to sneak up on him, to pretend that she just wanted to play.

  The shovel in his hand scraped out a steady rhythm as she slowly stepped off the porch, bending to scoop some snow out of the pile he’d made when he’d scraped that part of the driveway. The snow might take a lot of work to remove, but it was perfect for what she had in mind. She formed a perfect snowball, took aim at where he was working a short distance away and threw it.

  It missed.

  “Shit.” She scooped up more snow as he laughed as he stopped shoveling and looked at the hole in the snow where her snowball had landed.

  “Nice try.” He turned his body around to face her as he leaned against his shovel.

  Splat.

  Snow sprayed across his chest as her snowball hit its mark this time. It was her turn to laugh as he looked down at his chest in surprise. Excitement surged through her as he looked up at her with the promise of revenge in his eyes.

  With deliberate movements he set the shovel aside and scooped up some snow. With a sque
al, she darted back up the stairs of the porch and ducked behind the wooden pillar that framed the stairs just as his snowball came flying at her. It glanced off her shoulder, sending a bit of snow in her face.

  She wiped her face off quickly and scooped up some snow that was thinly layered on the porch, quickly forming it into a ball. She turned to fire it at him and let out a cry of surprise when she saw he was standing behind her, looming over her with a grin on his face.

  The snowball she’d tossed had done its job, which was to lure him in close to her. Did she have the courage to go further?

  Her eyes went down to his mouth, and in an unconscious move, she licked her lips. The smile on his face fell away, to be replaced with a serious expression as the desire in his blue eyes flared to life. He wanted her too, there was no doubt at all in her mind, given the look in his eyes. But he was holding himself back, and she thought perhaps she knew why.

  Alex was different. He wouldn’t push her into sleeping with him. If she wanted to make love with him, she had to give him a clear signal that it was what she wanted. And as she stood there on his front porch, looking up at him with only a short distance between them, she knew without a doubt she was ready to take this thing between them to the next level.

  And she also knew that she was going to have to show him that this was what she wanted, that she was going into this with her eyes open and that she would not run from him after it was over like she had the last time they’d slept together.

  She reached out with her gloved hands and gripped the front of his coat. With a jerk of her hands, she pulled him to her, and a rumbled came from his chest as a fire lit in his eyes. She stood on her tiptoes, but she was still not tall enough to reach his lips on her own. Fortunately for her, he was eager to accommodate the differences in their height and he bent his head toward her.

  When his lips fused with hers, she let go of his coat to put her arms around his neck. His arms came around her and he pulled her tight against him. She moved her mouth under his and with a tentative movement, she slipped her tongue in his mouth. He growled in response as he deepened the kiss.

  His mouth was firm on hers as he kissed her with a passion that held nothing back. He smelled like cold and snow, along with the scent that was uniquely Alex. The scent of him called to her, as the wolf inside her recognized it as that of her man.

  She wanted him, and he wanted her, and standing here with him on his front porch was not where she wanted to be. The thickness of their coats was a frustrating barrier between them and she wanted nothing to be between them but skin.

  She sank back on her heels and pulled her mouth away from his. He looked down at her, and she could see his longing for her but she knew that he was waiting for some signal from her that she wanted to take this farther than kisses shared between them out here in the cold.

  “I want you. Let’s go inside.” She took his hand and led him inside the house.

  9

  As Mercy stepped inside the vestibule, with Alex’s hand in hers, she hesitated for one very brief second. She did a quick inventory of her feelings, just to be sure that by sleeping with him she would not be making the same mistake that she’d made the first time with him. There was nothing in her feelings at this moment, except the desire for him and a need to be close to him. There was nothing that she wanted to bury or blot out.

  She turned to him with a smile on her face, and he searched her eyes for a second before he returned that smile.

  She stripped off her gloves and hat and tossed them aside. The zipper for her coat came next, and he slipped his hands inside, putting them around her waist and pulling her to him.

  “I need to kiss you again.” His voice was a rough growl as he lowered his head to hers. She put her arms around him, raised herself up on her tiptoes and offered her mouth up to him.

  He fused his lips to hers and a feeling of rightness settled inside her. It was like his lips were made for her and hers for him. And as her desire for him increased, there was no sign inside her that this was something she was doing to bury negative feelings. This would not be like the first time they’d slept together.

  As he kissed her in the vestibule, she was feeling like Alex’s woman. A small part of her hesitated over that, but why shouldn’t she feel like that. She wanted him, he wanted her, they were living together and they were having a baby. It was the most natural thing in the world for her to think that they belonged to each other.

  And that sense of togetherness needed expression beyond kissing in the vestibule. She needed this to go further, to go all the way to his bedroom where they could bring pleasure to each other.

  She sank back down until her feet were flat on the floor and eased her mouth away from his.

  “Think we’d be a lot more comfortable in your bedroom, don’t you?”

  A grin pulled up the corner of his mouth. “Absolutely.”

  She shrugged out of her coat and hung it on the hook as a giddy feeling came close to erupting inside her. It made her realize how much she’d wanted to do this and now that she wasn’t being held back by her doubts, the only feelings left inside her were desire and excitement. She was going to sleep with Alex, and with the deep snow on the ground, they had nowhere they needed to be. They had all the time in the world to devote to each other.

  It took only moments for them to divest themselves of their outerwear and they moved silently to Alex’s bedroom on quick feet. When they got there, he looked at the messy bed and then at her.

  “I was in such a rush to help you with your morning sickness that I didn’t make it.”

  She walked up to him, slid her arms up his chest and cupped her hands at the back of his neck. “It doesn’t matter since we’ll only mess it up again.”

  He gave a little laugh as he pulled her to him. It felt so good, having his hard, masculine body pressed against hers. The contrast of the muscular planes of his body with the soft curves of her own felt delicious, and she wanted to remove all barriers between them so that all that was left was what truly mattered.

  He dipped his head to kiss her, but he didn’t linger over it. It was like he knew as well as she did that they had other things to do besides stand here kissing. And those things would be better done naked.

  They quickly undressed, and although she’d seen him naked before, this time felt so different that it was almost like she’d was experiencing being with him for the first time. His body was strong, and she knew from first-hand experience just how strong he was, and it showed in the sculpted muscles of his body. He wasn’t overly developed like a man who devoted every waking moment to going to the gym. His shoulders were broad, the muscles of his chest well developed and the ridges of his abdomen were well defined. Her eyes darted down, and she licked her lips in an unconscious move when she saw the hardened jut of his cock. She knew well how much pleasure that part of his body could give her.

  She moved her eyes back up to his, and the desire in them was clear as he looked at her with the same thoroughness that she’d given him.

  “You’re beautiful.” His words sent a pleased smile spreading across her face.

  “So are you.” She reached out a hand and he took it. Together they climbed on the bed and settled in.

  Now that they were here together, with nothing but skin between them, it seemed like they could slow down, there was no rush to bring this encounter to its most pleasurable conclusion.

  She stretched out on the bed and he lay propped on his elbow beside her. He caressed her body with his eyes first, taking in the sight of her as desire darkened the blue of his eyes. His hand came to rest on her belly, and he moved it in slow circles as he leaned down.

  He fused his mouth with hers in a slow, tender kiss as his hand moved up her belly toward her breasts. She offered herself up to him, trusting him with her body and her feelings. Alex was the kind of man who would cherish both.

  She ran her hands up over his shoulders, up his neck until she could spear her fingers in his
short, soft hair. She used her lips to communicate her desire for him and responded by deepening the kiss as his hand cupped her breast.

  She offered her flesh up to him as her nipple hardened, and she shivered as the electric desire that went through her at his touch. He pulled his mouth away from hers and she looked into the dark depths of his blue eyes. He smiled down at her as he caressed her breast and she arched her back slightly to encourage him to continue. His touch felt so good on her flesh that she didn’t want him to stop.

  He lowered his head again, but instead of kissing her lips he pressed his mouth against her neck and slowly moved his lips down the skin of her throat. He was in no rush, and goosebumps rose up all over her skin as her body tightened with the delight his caressing hand and soft lips sent through her.

  With an agonizing slowness that felt delicious, his mouth finally caught up with his hand. His tongue moved in slow, wet circles as he moved toward her aching nipple. She groaned, thinking he would never get there.

  “Please.” Her voice came out in a whisper, and she didn’t need to say anymore to communicate to him what she wanted. He laughed softly against her flesh, and the vibration sent a little thrill through her. She pushed up against him, and he gave her what she wanted, taking her nipple in the warm recesses of his mouth.

  He sucked on her flesh, and the feeling was delicious. It was like she remembered from the last time and yet so different too. Could it be because she was making love with him now because he was the man she desired above all others and not because the pleasure he was giving her was a blocker for the turmoil she’d been feeling that first time? Whatever the cause, soon she couldn’t think, could only feel as he moved his mouth to her other breast to devote his entire focus to it.

  She moved restlessly on the bed, needing more from him as he built the fire of her need inside her. His mouth moved away from her breasts, down the smooth skin of her upper torso down toward her belly button. Once he got to it, he dragged his tongue around it and pleasure shot through her toes and up through the rest of her body.