Conceit & Concealment: A Pride & Prejudice Variation
Page 18
Elizabeth laughed. “I am indeed very selfish! Still, your aunt agreed not to order the evening dresses, so I have no reason to leave. You have nothing to worry about.”
“Nothing at all,” agreed Darcy. His aunt had almost certainly returned to the milliner later with instructions to make the dresses anyway, but he would deal with that problem when it arose. “I will have to suffer my disappointment, consoling myself with the pleasure of admiring you in whatever dress you may choose to wear.”
“And you say your brother does not flirt!” Elizabeth said dryly to Georgiana.
Darcy raised an eyebrow. “As I have said before, I am highly selective about it.”
Elizabeth made a face at him. “Well, Georgiana, if I can manage to tolerate your brother's company, I can certainly deal with your aunt. Shall we let him go, then? I will be able to amuse myself for hours thinking of how much he must be suffering in the company of the odious French.”
“And you will remain here with me and not leave?” asked Georgiana.
“I will stay right here with you.” She rubbed Georgiana’s hand.
Darcy tried not to let his relief show. After having Elizabeth in his house for even a few days, he did not know how he had ever made it through a day without her. Someday he would have to face that dilemma, but it would not be today.
***
There was no escape. Georgiana might have made her promise to stay, but somehow Elizabeth had to find a way to leave. Staying in the same house with Mr. Darcy was tearing her apart.
Whenever she saw him, she felt more drawn to him, and she knew he felt the same. He would walk into a room, an attentive question for Georgiana on his lips, bristling in response to a barb from Kit, or inquiring after his aunt's comfort – but only after his gaze had first settled on Elizabeth. She would look up to find his eyes caressing her silently, his face sporting a slight smile as if at a pleasant memory, or sometimes a twist to his lips that seemed to acknowledge the hopelessness of their situation. Those moments added light to her life, but that made no difference.
She could not stop her agonizing thoughts of him married to Georgiana. Her only consolation was the hope that such a fierce attraction must burn itself out quickly, but each morning the knot of anxiety in her stomach grew larger, and she had to work harder to smile as she forced herself to swallow her breakfast.
Her only relief came at dinnertime. Darcy usually dined with his French officer friends, not returning until after most of the house was asleep. Not Elizabeth, though. She could not force her eyes to close while she imagined what, or who, might be keeping him out so late. French officers were fond of the company of beautiful women, were they not? Even if Darcy did not go of his own desire, any man might enjoy looking at those lovely women.
Who could have guessed a mere glimpse of love could hurt so very much?
After a fortnight, she had to face the truth. Familiarity had not, as she had hoped, lessened her feelings for him. Instead it had only shown her how well-suited Darcy was to her. The final straw had been the easy rhythm they had settled into while calming Georgiana. It felt so natural and so right, but it could not change the fact that he belonged to Georgiana, not to her.
Even as she had reassured Georgiana she would not leave her, Elizabeth knew it could not work, not while the girl lived with Mr. Darcy. But at the same time, how could she break her word to Georgiana? It was an impossible situation.
She had to do something, so the next day she sought out Lady Matlock. “Your ladyship, I have been hoping for an opportunity to speak to you privately. I find myself in need of advice.”
Lady Matlock showed no sign of surprise. “If there is any way in which I can be of assistance to you, I would be happy to do my best.”
“I thank you. You have been very kind to me; in fact, everyone here has been very kind, welcoming me as if I were part of your family. But I am not one of you. I am a stranger whose path crossed with that of Mr. Darcy, and I cannot remain as a hanger-on here forever. The difficulty is Georgiana's fear of separating from me. I hoped you might have some thoughts as to how I could convince her to let me go.”
“You wish to leave, then?” Lady Matlock’s eyes seemed to penetrate into her.
Elizabeth looked down at her hands. “I think I must.”
“Not quite what I asked, but I sympathize. It would be wise for me to leave, but it has been such a pleasure to be with William and Kit, and to know Frederica and Richard are here in the same city, that I keep finding reasons to remain a little longer.” She gave a light sigh. “What do you propose to do when you leave?”
“I thought to ask Frederica if there is any way I could be of use to her cause.”
“And, of course, Frederica will say that the most useful thing you can do is to remain with Georgiana and help her learn to be a lady.”
The problem was that Georgiana was always with Darcy, but Elizabeth could not say that. “She might have some other ideas. Failing that, I suppose Scotland is my best option. I hoped I might ask your ladyship for a letter of introduction to your son who lives there. Perhaps he could assist me in finding a situation as a companion or a governess.”
“He would be happy to help you, of course. Still, it is interesting that you and I have been grappling with similar dilemmas. Mine, though, is how to separate Georgiana from Darcy. I had hoped your presence would ease her way, but that will not work if you are leaving.”
Elizabeth should not care what happened to Darcy and Georgiana after she left, but she could not help herself. “Why would you wish to separate them after all this time?”
“Georgiana has become a young woman. It is not suitable for her to be living with a single gentleman. She needs to learn to be a lady, and that is something he cannot teach her. And, if I dare say it, Darcy has paid a high price for his guardianship. It has weighed him down, and, as a doting aunt, I would like to relieve him of the burden.” Lady Matlock looked as if she were gazing at something in the far distance – or perhaps into the past.
“The war has weighed us all down in one way or another.” How had she found herself attempting to comfort Lady Matlock?
The countess's eyes seem to clear. “Indeed it has. Now, what was I saying? Ah, yes, Georgiana. I had been thinking of taking a small house in the country where you and Georgiana could live with me. It would not be charity, as you would be providing an important service as Georgiana's companion. Equally importantly, she seems more inclined to follow your example than that of a woman old enough to be her grandmother. Is that a situation you would consider?”
Elizabeth bit her lip. It was a tempting offer. The idea of going to live among strangers in Scotland was frightening, and she had grown fond of Lady Matlock. “What of Mr. Darcy? Would he live there?”
Lady Matlock gazed steadily at her. “It is his company you wish to avoid, is it? If he has been attempting to take advantage of you, I hope you will tell me. You are here under my protection, and I will not permit inappropriate behavior towards you.”
Elizabeth recoiled. “Not at all. He has behaved properly towards me.” Apart from that memorable day at Netherfield which felt like several lifetimes ago.
“I am glad of that. He would not live with us, since the point is to avoid having a single man sharing the household with two unmarried girls. I daresay he would be a regular visitor, though. Georgiana would insist on it.”
It would still be hard to see him when he visited, but it would be even harder to say a final goodbye. Perhaps it would be enough. She would not have to worry about encountering him every time she entered a room or wonder where he was each evening. “I would like to consider it, if I may.”
“Of course, my dear. It is all contingent upon obtaining Darcy’s agreement, of course.”
Elizabeth wondered how Darcy would react when he learned of her role in the plan.
***
Darcy eyed his younger brother. Admittedly, the placid life at Darcy House must be tedious for a young man accustomed
to skirting the law and daring escapes, but even so, Kit’s choice to voluntarily remain in the room when Lady Matlock asked to discuss a serious matter was downright reckless. Poor Kit would no doubt end up entangled in some convoluted scheme as a result. Perhaps he did not recall how wily she could be, even if it was usually in a good cause, of course.
Darcy folded his hands. “How may I be of service to you, Madam?”
“I would like to discuss Georgiana's future. When you originally accepted her under your care, we hoped it would be no more than a year or two until the French were defeated. Unfortunately, it did not turn out that way, but Georgiana is no longer a child. It is not suitable for a young lady to be in your sole care.”
Darcy examined her statement for traps before responding. “It has certainly been a more comfortable situation since you and Elizabeth have been with us.”
“You have done an excellent job of educating her for her future responsibilities, but now she needs to learn to be a lady. And, while it is understandable that she has developed an excessive dependence upon you, we must begin to wean her away from her constant need for your presence.”
Was that intended as a rebuke? “Her situation was an unusual one.”
“Indeed. I would like to propose that we set up a separate establishment for Georgiana, much as you would have done had she been an ordinary girl, under my care and with Elizabeth as her companion. It would need to be nearby so Georgiana could have easy access to you, but I believe she could tolerate the separation under those conditions.”
Darcy's hands gripped the arms of his chair, but he kept his voice neutral. “Georgiana's reactions can be difficult to predict. She could interpret this plan as a desire on my part to be free of her, and it could make her even more anxious.” It was a reasonable answer, and he hoped his aunt could not tell that his response was more to the idea of losing Elizabeth than Georgiana.
To his surprise, Kit stepped up to his defense. “I do not think Georgiana is ready to leave William yet. He is her rock. Even Elizabeth is but a recent acquaintance in comparison. Yesterday it took both William and Elizabeth to calm her when she was in distress. Encouraging her independence is an excellent goal, but I believe she would do better remaining here with all of us for now.”
Darcy was sufficiently glad of Kit's support that he did not consider why his brother might make such a strong statement. “A separate household in your care is a good goal, but I agree with Kit that it would be better taken slowly. If we were to attempt it now and Georgiana could not tolerate the separation, she might not agree to try it a second time later on.”
Lady Matlock’s serene expression faltered slightly. “She is almost sixteen. Anyone seeing her behavior towards you would find it odd in a girl her age.”
Darcy could not argue with that, since his knowledge of fifteen-year-old girls was based solely on Georgiana. “That may be true, but it does not follow that an abrupt change will improve matters.” He tried to sound calm, but if his aunt chose to insist on this plan, he would have little choice but to accept it. After all, Georgiana had originally been in Lady Matlock's care, not his. King George would never have approved placing her with a man of Darcy's age.
Lady Matlock pursed her lips. “I confess I had anticipated you would be eager to be relieved of the burden, but perhaps other aspects of the situation outweigh that. Nevertheless, she will not become less dependent on you when she is with you so constantly most days. Perhaps if you were away from the house more, she might learn to tolerate your absence better.”
Other aspects of the situation? Was his aunt taking a shot in the dark or had she guessed his feelings about Elizabeth? “I could arrange to be away more during the day,” he said slowly. He supposed he could go to his club. And he would strangle Kit if he tried to flirt with Elizabeth in his absence.
It was not fair. He finally had his family around him, and now they wanted him to leave.
Chapter 11
“I do wish I could have seen the Rosetta Stone,” Georgiana said wistfully as they crossed the courtyard in front of Montagu House. “But even if the best exhibits have been taken to Paris, I am still glad we saw what is left of the Egyptian exhibit.”
Even though they had visited the museum at an unfashionably early hour and Georgiana was wearing a deep poke bonnet which shadowed her face, Kit walked closer to her side than was proper, almost like a bodyguard.
Elizabeth bumped him with her elbow. “Kit, do stop hovering. It looks odd.”
Kit flushed. An outing to the British Museum had seemed a fine idea when Georgiana had proposed it, but now that they were out among other museum-goers, all he wanted was to bundle her into a carriage and get her out of sight. William, damn him, looked as much at ease as he ever did. Perhaps he was so accustomed to the risk that he no longer noticed it. It had been over a month since Kit first met Georgiana, but he could not forget for a second that the safety of the heir to the throne was in their hands.
“It is most unfashionable of me,” said Elizabeth in a louder voice, “but I have to say I prefer the Greek sculptures to the Egyptian antiquities. Even if the Egyptian exhibit is more exotic, I admire the purity of line of the Greeks. Why, some of those statues were so lifelike I could imagine them stepping down from their pedestals and inquiring about the time of day.”
Georgiana said, “If they did, we would be glad to have William with us, as I am certain none of the rest of us could converse in ancient Greek!”
Still smarting, Kit added, “But then they would be discussing Greek odes for hours while we all fell asleep on our feet.”
Elizabeth intervened before William could do more than glare at him. “I had not known you for a classical scholar, Mr. Darcy. I pestered my father endlessly to teach me Greek, but he did not have the patience for it. Nor, perhaps, did I, since I always preferred to be out of doors whenever I could! But I suppose it was not a practical accomplishment for a lady in any case.”
“As far as I am concerned, it is not a practical skill for anyone,” declared Kit. “What good will it do me to spend years learning to read Herodotus in the original when there are perfectly good translations available?”
William did not rise to the bait. “You never know when knowledge of the classics may turn out to be useful.”
There was clearly no sport to be had in baiting his brother today. William had kept his word to their aunt and had gone out every day, but he had made an exception in joining them for this outing. Most likely he did not trust Kit to manage it himself. Typical William.
Kit kept his eye on the people around them, watching for potential dangers. They had arrived at the museum in a carriage, but with the plan of walking back since it was just over a mile to Darcy House. Again, it had sounded reasonable at the time, but now it seemed to leave Georgiana horribly exposed.
His worries magnified when they reached Oxford Street. A crowd of people stood on the pavement, held back from the street by a line of French soldiers. Kit’s heart began to pound. Should they turn around and take a different route, or perhaps return to the museum and try again later? But they were already in the midst of the crowd, and they could not afford to look as if they were running away. Kit sidled closer to Georgiana. Elizabeth did the same on the girl’s other side.
In his stuffiest voice, William said, “My good man, whatever is happening here?” He seemed to be speaking to a prosperous looking fellow beside him.
The man spat on the pavement. “Prince Jérôme will be coming through shortly.” He sneered as he said the name. “Most likely that is his carriage approaching. Would that it could drive him back to France, or straight to hell!” A murmur of agreement came from around him.
Georgiana rose on her tiptoes, craning her head to see over the people in front of her. Elizabeth clasped her hand and whispered urgently in her ear.
Surreptitiously Kit felt for the knife hidden beneath his waistcoat. There was no escape, but as long as the soldiers took no notice of them, they should
be safe. Dear God, if anything happened...
An open carriage, gilded and drawn by four horses, clattered down the street. Bonaparte’s brother, the so-called Prince Jérôme, held himself proudly, ignoring the sullen crowd watching him. His two children sat beside him.
Georgiana tugged at Elizabeth’s restraining hand. Her voice pitched high, she said, “Let me go! I want to see them.”
Several people turned to stare at her – including two of the soldiers.
Then William pushed his way in front of Georgiana, sending her stumbling back against Kit, and pulled Elizabeth against him. Wrapping one arm around her waist, he said in a slurred voice, “What’s a pretty girl like you doing here all alone? Waiting for me, perhaps? Come, give us a kiss, there’s a good girl.” He bent his head as if trying to kiss her.
Elizabeth struggled in his arms. “Unhand me at once, sir! You are drunk!” she cried loudly, pounding her fists on William’s chest.
Kit grasped Georgiana’s arms. “Swoon!” he hissed at her.
“But I—”
“I said swoon! Now!”
She collapsed against him.
Kit swept her up in his arms and pushed his way back through the crowd. “Pardon me...Sorry...my sister needs some air...” Behind him he could hear Elizabeth, now shrieking as she begged for assistance.
“Just a little kiss!” It was William’s drunken voice.
His brother apparently had hidden acting talents. Kit decided to leave him to it. He carried Georgiana back towards the museum. Had there not been a hackney stand there? This time there would be no walking. Georgiana was going to sit inside a carriage where no one could see her, and that was final.