Typical Powerful Choleric words can be spotted here: swiftly, control, commander, self-assurance, iron will, dominate, take-charge determination, consigned, reorganization, decision-making machinery, supreme, directive, power, faster, complete.
As you begin to understand the temperaments and apply them in your everyday life, even reading Time magazine will be more fun, and your ability to understand other people and predict their responses will increase rapidly.
An article about Margaret Thatcher, former Prime Minister of England, also used many Powerful Choleric terms: excelled, dominated, talented, capable, queenly, decisively, intensely competitive, tougher, more direct, challenged, aggressive tactics, deadly, resents suggestions. From pulling these words out, it is easy to see that she is a Powerful Choleric leader. She is said to “dress severely in strong colors and speak with persuasion.” Here is a dynamic woman, exuding confidence and control.
Born Leader
Powerful Cholerics will exhibit a take-charge attitude very early in life. They are born leaders and will look out through the bars of their cribs and plan how soon they will take over from Mother. With them, it is not a question of will they take control, but when. They will let their parents know what they expect out of life, they will be demanding of their rights very early, and they will use a loud voice or temper tantrums to solidify control.
Often when I talk with mothers who don’t understand the personalities, they tell me of these strong-willed children who won’t do anything they are told; who make decisions for the whole family; and who, at an early age, are firmly in charge of the household.
Our daughter Lauren is a Powerful Choleric. From the time she could first walk, she was mature and able to manage the household. When Marita was born, Lauren, who was four, became a competent second mother. She could be trusted to heat the bottle correctly, and she trained the baby-sitters. When she was in nursery school, the teacher told me, “I never worry about being absent, because I know Lauren could run the whole class with no outside help.” And she was right. Lauren was a leader all through school, and got her B.A. degree in psychology and business.
I recently visited in a home where eight-year-old Jenny was resident queen. She had four older brothers and sisters who moved when she said so. Her Powerful Choleric mother ran the family business, but when she came home she was submissive to Jenny. “It’s easier than fighting her,” she claimed.
At six o’clock one night the mother announced, “We are taking Mrs. Littauer out to the steak house for dinner.”
Jenny stated clearly, “I want pizza!”
Right then Jenny and I knew we were going out for pizza, but the mother had to look strong in front of me, so she repeated, while squeezing Jenny’s arm for emphasis, “We are going out for steak.”
Jenny pulled away with, “Don’t pinch me. I want pizza.” Her eyes shot daggers at her mother and the ultimate victory was clear.
Jenny threw herself on the floor and began to cry. The brothers and sisters ran in and asked, “Why is Jenny crying?”
“Because she wants to go out for pizza.”
“Then why don’t we go and keep her happy?”
“Well, all right. We’ll go out for pizza.”
At this point, Jenny jumped up quickly, winked at me in victory, and we all went out for pizza.
The next day I asked her mother, “When did Jenny first take control of the family?” The mother sighed, “When she was about three months old, I guess. She learned early that when she screamed, we all ran, and she’s been bossing us around ever since.”
On a trip home from Canada, Marita, who combines much Powerful Choleric with her Popular Sanguine temperament, had to fly into Spokane to transfer to Seattle, and then on to Los Angeles. When her plane landed in Spokane, she was told the flight to Seattle was unavailable (with no explanation). She walked to the proposed gate anyway, and found a group of agitated passengers and no airline personnel. She went to the next gate and got as much information as possible from the clerk. When she returned, she sat up on the high ticket counter and began doling out her limited knowledge to whoever asked. Soon people were looking to her for leadership on several subjects, including directions to the men’s room.
As it became apparent the flight was going to be hours late, and there was mutiny brewing in her flock, Marita went to the Hertz counter and checked on the cost of renting cars to drive to Seattle. With all the facts in hand, she went back to her perch above the crowd and called for their attention. Everyone listened as she explained Plan B. She asked those who wanted to let Hertz put them in the driver’s seat to raise their hands. She then divided them into groups of six, appointed a captain for each group to drive, and a treasurer to collect the money. As she led them off happily to Hertz, one woman said, “It’s so nice of the airlines to hire a lovely girl to take care of us.”
In times of crisis Powerful Choleric takes control.
Compulsive Need for Change
Powerful Cholerics are compulsive and they must change whatever they see out of place and correct whatever wrongs are being put upon the helpless. Powerful Cholerics rise quickly to causes and campaigns for the right. They are never indifferent or apathetic but concerned and confident.
Powerful Cholerics straighten pictures in other people’s houses and polish the silver in restaurants. One day, when I was at a Popular Sanguine friend’s home, helping her with the dishes, I noticed her silver drawer was full of crumbs and the silver was all mixed up. Without thinking of what I was doing, I dumped out all the silver, cleaned the divided tray, and sorted the pieces all out into the proper compartments. When she viewed all the forks in one section and the spoons neatly in another, she blinked and said, “Now I see why those trays have all those little sections. I never understood before.”
At a Personality Plus seminar in Phoenix, my Powerful Choleric friend Marilyn and I were in the midst of an intense conversation, when her sister Mary Sue came up between us. Neither one of us missed a beat, but I noticed Mary Sue’s collar was tucked under, and I automatically reached up to fix it. As I had my hand on her shoulder, I noticed Marilyn’s hand on the other shoulder, brushing some lint off her jacket. Without even knowing what we were doing, we two Powerful Cholerics were compulsively correcting some little wrong.
Strong-Willed and Decisive
All organizations, businesses, and families need the strength of will and ability to make decisions that come pre-packaged in Powerful Choleric. Where others can’t make up their minds, Powerful Choleric will decide instantly. They solve problems and save time, although not everyone appreciates their decisiveness.
Helen came up to me after a seminar and said, “Now I know what happened on my trip to Europe. I didn’t know the temperaments then, but I obviously went on a tour with three Peaceful Phlegmatic friends.” She then told me how indecisive they were, and how she had to take charge. “Each night I’d tell them what time to meet in the hotel lobby and what to wear. ‘Be downstairs at 7:30 A.M. sharp, and be sure to have on your walking shoes because we’ll be touring Windsor Castle.’ They didn’t get excited over anything, and I had to pull them off buses to get them to see the sights. One refused to go into Notre Dame because she felt all cathedrals look alike. Each afternoon when we returned, they’d want to take a nap and I’d have to remind them, ‘Don’t sleep too long or you’ll miss the night tour.’ If it hadn’t been for me, they’d be standing in Piccadilly Square today! The hardest thing to take is the fact that not one of them has called me since our return.”
Powerful Cholerics have a difficult role in life. They have the answers; they know what to do; they can make quick decisions; they bail others out—but they are rarely popular because their assurance and assertiveness make others feel insecure, and their ability to lead can easily make them appear bossy. By understanding the temperaments, Powerful Choleric should try to moderate their actions, so that others will rejoice in the Powerful Choleric’s obvious abilities and not be offended by
them.
Can Run Anything
Powerful Cholerics can run anything, whether or not they have any knowledge of the bylaws. In fact, I’ve never joined anything where I couldn’t see the possibility of becoming president within the year. I once became president of the Connecticut Speech and Drama Association at the first meeting I went to—before I even joined. Powerful Choleric has the innate ability to rise to the top and take over.
One of the hardest disciplines I’ve had to put upon myself is to keep from straightening out everyone else’s problems. This sounds easy to all of you, except Powerful Cholerics, who instantly run everything whether or not they’ve ever been to it before. Our mayor’s Powerful Choleric wife and I went to a luncheon for five hundred women. They had placed the long buffet tables in a V with women coming from each end and meeting in the middle with sometimes disastrous results. Several bumped plates, spilling their food, and some dropped their dishes, which shattered on the tile floor. The line moved very slowly, and they ran out of food before our section even got into line. As I sat there, I did a Powerful Choleric appraisal of the situation and noticed Penny was deep in thought also. I asked her what she was plotting, and she came up with the exact plan I had. We both could see that the tables should have been set in an X, which would have allowed four lines to function simultaneously, and no one would come face to face with an opposing force.
We both laughed as we realized how our Powerful Choleric minds were busy straightening out the errors of others, even when the whole procedure was totally out of our hands. Powerful Cholerics naturally see the practical answers to life’s problems and can’t imagine why no one else has come up with the right idea.
Goal Oriented
Powerful Choleric is always more interested in achieving goals than pleasing people. This is both a positive and negative, in that they tend to end up on top alone. One Junior Women’s Club president I know set unbelievable goals for what her chapter was going to achieve in her year. She motivated the troops and kept on everyone’s back to make sure they were marching in step. At the end of her term, her club won more District Awards than any other, but she confessed, “I don’t have a friend left in the group.”
When I was president of the Women’s Club of San Bernardino, I asked one Powerful Choleric lady to be a committee chairwoman, and she replied, “I’d be glad to be chairwoman if I don’t have to have a committee. Those women get in the way.”
Powerful Cholerics can always do the work better if they can keep the people out of the way. They frequently become loners, not by intent, but because no one can keep up with them, and they let others know that they are a hindrance to progress.
Organizes Well
Since I have the opportunity to visit in many homes, I observe how mothers of different temperaments raise their children. My friend Connie in Phoenix is a perfect Powerful Choleric who has her home running smoothly and efficiently, because of her ability to organize and her willingness to follow up on her instructions. Her two young sons, Andy, a Powerful Choleric, and Jay, a Peaceful Phlegmatic, have been so well trained that they can keep the home together, even when she is away. One evening, Marita and I arrived much later than expected, and Connie had left for a meeting. Andy met us at the door and said, “Mother had to go out, but Jay and I will get your dinner.” As we watched them go about the preparations, I noticed a card on the counter with these simple instructions:
Within minutes they had each fulfilled their assignments, and we enjoyed a lovely meal together. Very few boys ten and twelve could have performed so efficiently, but they had been trained by an organized and consistent mother.
As I looked around I saw that Connie had placed simple reminders to the boys in strategic spots. On the TV was a neatly printed sign, ONE HOUR OF TV ON WEEKNIGHTS, IF YOU’VE FINISHED YOUR SCHEDULE. TV ON WEEKENDS BY PERMISSION.
On the piano a three-by-five-inch card said, COUNT OUT LOUD. In the bathroom, taped to the mirror, KEEP SINK AND MIRRORS CLEAN, and in the kitchen, 25¢ IF DISHES NOT TAKEN TO SINK.
Mothers of other temperaments see this organization as too much work, but I know from experience it makes for a happy and efficient home. From the time my children were little, I trained them to help and put up a Work Chart for them to check off as they achieved their goals. I believe that when Mother stands, we all stand. When Mother works, we all work.
Because I organized and trained them well, they have grown up to be disciplined workers, even though their temperaments all differ. In any business or home situation, organization is a necessity to achieve goals. The person who doesn’t know where he’s going, doesn’t get there. Powerful Choleric is a master at quick, practical organization.
Delegates Work
Powerful Choleric’s greatest asset is his ability to accomplish more than anyone else, aided by his gift for organization. When he looks at any task, he sees instantly how it should be handled, and he divides the project into mental chunks of work. He knows what assistance he has available, and he quickly portions out the chores among the group. He is not above giving responsibilities to idle bystanders (as he assumes anyone would rather work than sit around).
As our children were growing up, Fred and I, both being part Powerful Choleric, made up Work Charts, on which we listed each child’s duties for the day. When they came home from school, they checked the chart and did what was expected of them before going out to play. If any guest child stayed in our home longer than three days, I put him on the chart and assigned work. I overheard one boy say to young Fred, “Your mother must like me. She put my name on the Work Chart.”
I feel so many mothers ignore the potential labor force they have free in their home, because it’s too much work to set up a simple system to delegate responsibilities.
Some Powerful Cholerics are so anxious to keep tight control that they only delegate the menial tasks—the “dummy work”—and save the grand plan for themselves. Carried to extremes, this protection of control keeps them from achieving as much as they could have done had they learned to deal with people and delegate more wisely.
Thrives on Opposition
Powerful Cholerics not only like to achieve goals, but they thrive on opposition. If Popular Sanguines set out to accomplish a task, and someone says it can’t be done, they thank the person profusely—and quit. Perfect Melancholies regret the time they’ve spent in planning and analyzing the situation, and Peaceful Phlegmatics are grateful it can’t be done, because it sounded too much like work in the first place. But tell Powerful Cholerics it’s impossible, and it just whets their appetite.
Lorna told me when her husband ignored a certain household task, she could get him to do it by saying, “Your mother was over today, and I told her you were going to hang these drapes and she said, ‘Why Joe doesn’t have any idea how to hang drapes!’” He would rise from the couch and promptly nail them to the wall.
One of the reasons so many Powerful Cholerics become professional athletes is they love the challenge of doing in the opposition. While other temperaments might be fainthearted when faced with eleven huge men on a football field, Powerful Choleric gets excited in the heat of battle. Whether male or female, Powerful Choleric has the killer instinct, the desire to beat the odds, that catapults him or her to the top in the business world today. They are not discouraged by criticism or daunted by the disinterested. They put their eye on the goal and thrive on opposition.
Has Little Need for Friends
While Popular Sanguine needs friends for an audience, and Perfect Melancholy needs friends for support, Powerful Choleric doesn’t need anyone around. He has his projects, and he considers socializing a waste of time because it is not accomplishing anything. Powerful Choleric will work for group activity when it has a purpose and will be glad to jump in and organize your fund drive, but he has no need to spend time in idle chatter.
Is Usually Right
Powerful Choleric has a built-in antenna for sensing situations, and he will make a pronounc
ement only if he knows he’s right. While this trait is a great asset, others who deal with Powerful Choleric don’t always appreciate his track record. Missy once told me her Powerful Choleric husband never made a mistake, and this fact really irked her. She kept hoping he’d trip and fall to show he was human. One day the thought came to her: If she were going to hire a business manager to run her family, she would want one who didn’t make any mistakes. She already had one at no charge, and from then on she looked at him in a new positive light.
Excels in Emergencies
The Powerful Choleric in me loves emergencies. One day, when I was about to speak to a Santa Rosa club, all the lights in that end of the city abruptly went out. Women shrieked and gasped as they tried to find their water glasses in a dark restaurant. Any speaker but a Powerful Choleric would have voted to close up and go home, but my mind immediately went into high gear as I planned a new approach to speaking in the dark. Lines came to me such as:
Personality Plus: How to Understand Others by Understanding Yourself Page 6
