The Inside Man: A Dublin Nights Novel

by Sahin, Brittney

  “You sure you didn’t hear anything? An accent. Something. Anything that might help?” I didn’t want to push, but the quicker we got on top of this, the easier it’d be to find these two animals.

  “I’d rather just forget tonight ever happened.” Her voice was flat, resigned.

  I stood in surprise. “Alessia, two men brutally attacked you while you were walking to the hotel.”

  “And I’m fine.”

  “You’re not fine!” I hadn’t meant to yell but damn it. She could’ve been taken from me again. Taken from this world. And I knew firsthand what a dark place the world was without her in it.

  “Sebastian will handle this.” She slowly faced me, her lips a tight line.

  My voice dropped low as I responded, “It’s my responsibility to handle this.”

  Her lip quivered as she stared at me, her eyes growing watery again. “I asked Sebastian to walk away from this life and look what happened. I know I can’t ask you to do the same, but you have to promise me something.”

  “What?” I sat on the edge of the bed. “Anything.”

  “You have to promise me you’ll never take a life. No matter the circumstances.” She paused. “It will change you. Please.”

  “Alessia,” I began, not sure how to word what needed to be said, “I don’t know if I can make that promise.” Especially after tonight. “I’m a League leader, the role comes with certain . . . expectations. I can’t say what might happen down the road as Sebastian and I work to take down The Alliance. But if we don’t, think of the consequences. And I don’t ever want to break a promise I make to you.”

  “I’m trying to protect you.” Her tone was stronger than her current fragile state.

  Protect me? “You don’t need to worry about me. I’m here to keep you safe.”

  “You don’t understand.” A few more tears slipped free, and she used the backs of her hands to wipe them away.

  “Make me understand, then.” My voice sounded hoarse, emotion a stranglehold on my throat.

  I rose once again and crossed my arms, so I didn’t reach for her like I desperately wanted to do.

  She didn’t give me an answer. Only more silence.

  “Alessia,” I pleaded once more, desperate for anything she would give me.

  The sight of her bruises ratcheted my desire to hit something, but I didn’t want it to be a wall this time. I needed it to be flesh.

  “Can you let me know when Emilia is here?” Her eyes went back to the window, the view of the city hidden by floor-to-ceiling silver drapes.

  Was that my cue to leave? “Yeah, of course. I’ll just be outside talking to your brother.”

  “Okay,” she returned, her voice emotionless.

  I slowly backed away from the bed, hating to leave her, but I needed to respect her wishes. I closed her bedroom door and found Sebastian lowering his mobile from his ear.

  “Something feels off,” I said, keeping my voice low so she didn’t overhear me. “What if it was a targeted hit?”

  “I was thinking the same thing. We need to get all the security footage from the street.”

  “I’m sorry,” I apologized. “Maybe I was the wrong person to take over for you. If they’re not respecting me, attacking our family, then—”

  “I’m pretty sure this has nothing to do with you.” His steely gaze journeyed to mine. “And everything to do with me.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Alessia

  “Emilia.”

  She closed the door behind her and dropped a small suitcase next to my bed. Probably a medical kit. I had no idea what her qualifications were, but I didn’t care. She was the only person I wanted to see right now.

  “Everything good?” I asked softly. Holly had come over and now joined Sebastian in the living room, and I definitely didn’t want them overhearing our conversation.

  Cole had begrudgingly left to follow a few leads.

  I’d planned on hiding what happened tonight, but I knew I’d never be able to explain away the bruises.

  “No. I don’t like this. Lying to Sebastian. To Cole.” She motioned for me to lift my shirt for an examination, but I shook my head, acting like a scared little girl.

  “I’m sorry I asked you for that favor, but I need you to trust me.” I’d called Emilia before Cole and my brother had shown up, and it’d been difficult to ask for help, but what choice did I have?

  “Do you now?” She tilted her head and pinned me with an admonishing look. “Without explaining yourself?”

  I nodded.

  “You need to tell me the truth about what really happened.” Her brows lifted. “And you need to tell them as well.” She pointed to the closed door.

  “I can’t. I’m sorry.” Shaking my head, I shut my eyes. But at the feel of her hand on the hem of my shirt, I flinched and peeled my lids open.

  “How badly did these guys hurt you?” She let go of my shirt and straightened. “And how badly did you hurt them?” Her gaze lasered into me.

  I sat up a little, surprised at her words. “What are you talking about?”

  Emilia folded her arms. “I know what happened with that bastard in the pub last week. I went to find out if you were okay since you’d been gone so long, and I caught him hobbling out of the bathroom and making a beeline for the exit.”

  “You weren’t at the table when I came back. Holly said you were on a call. If you knew what I’d done, why didn’t you come in? Say something?” I was still in shock. The perceptive looks she’d given me at the table, her suggestion I start training . . . she’d known the truth all that time. She was aware I could handle myself.

  “I made sure you looked okay after you left the women’s room, then I followed the guy to the parking lot.” She tipped her head to the side. “I did make a phone call, and it was to an associate of mine. Instructing him to ensure the man knew he was to never touch a woman again. In Dublin or anywhere.” Her words were so calm. So matter of fact. This was her job, though.

  “And why didn’t you say anything?”

  She shrugged and flicked her wrist to lift my shirt again. “You looked fine. You didn’t seem to want to talk about it, so I figured you didn’t want anyone to know you were capable of taking down a man twice your size.”

  “He was drunk, which gave me an advantage.” I couldn’t believe this was happening. My secret—one of them—was out there.

  “Did you learn to fight at the prison?”

  I nodded, not interested in divulging more. But I did grasp the hem of my shirt, realizing I’d have to lift it sooner or later.

  “Tell me you at least got in a few good swings tonight with those men. I’m assuming that’s why you called and asked me to wipe clean the security footage of the attack?” Her dark brown eyes narrowed. “You should tell Sebastian and Cole you know how to fight. You know they’re going to find out sooner or later, and it’d be better coming from you.”

  I let go of a deep breath and lifted my shirt. She came closer to the bed, her eyes moving over my abdomen. “Don’t tell them about this. Promise.” Emilia was The League leader of Italy, and I was asking her to bend the rules for me. “Sebastian and Cole wouldn’t be able to handle the truth of what happened in that prison. Not yet, at least.”

  Her lips rolled inward. “Do I need to kill Luca?”

  She’d do it, too, without blinking an eye. Sadly, that wouldn’t make things better.

  And after tonight, I realized I needed Luca alive if I was ever to get myself out of this mess. For now, at least.

  “Luca didn’t do this to me.”

  Her fingers feathered over the scars, the wounds on my body. “Anywhere else?” Her voice remained matter of fact as she examined me.

  “A few. One on my back. Another on my right thigh.”

  Let me teach you. Let me help you. My stomach squeezed at the memory of those words spoken to me six months ago. No more getting hurt, you hear me?

  Emilia pursed her lips, stepped back, and tossed
her leather jacket on the floor, then pushed her sleeves to her elbows. I thought she was about to examine me, but instead, she lifted her own shirt, revealing toned abs. “See that scar?” A jagged mark at her side. “Guy stabbed me with a corkscrew.” She rolled her eyes as if the entire situation had been annoying rather than painful. “And this beauty,” she began while turning to show me a wicked slash above her bra line, “was from a machete.” She dropped her shirt.

  “Why are you telling me this?” I blinked a few times, a bit stunned at the turn of the conversation.

  “These scars are part of me. They’re memories. Failures.” She grabbed her bag and set it on the bed. “But they’re only the ones people can see.” Her dark eyes collided with mine. “I carry around a lot more that are invisible. Those are the ones that hurt the most.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “Don’t be. I chose this life, but you didn’t.” She pointed a red nail my way. “You don’t deserve those marks. I don’t know what went down in that prison, but eventually, the truth will come out. And you won’t be able to stop your brother from taking revenge on whoever is responsible for those scars.”

  I closed my eyes and lowered my shirt, a brisk chill coating my skin.

  “They don’t need to know,” I insisted.

  “So, you’ll never wear a bikini? Never have sex?” Emilia shot me a sly smile. “With Cole?” She sat next to me and began pressing on my abdomen, checking for tender areas.

  I wasn’t hurt that badly. This wasn’t necessary. But it was nice to have an ally. A friend. Someone who might understand me. She was a strong, battle-hardened woman.

  “He’s The League leader of Ireland. And whether you want Cole to be that man or not, it’s happening. He’s transforming. Becoming the man we’re grooming him to be.”

  Her words had my stomach tightening.

  “It’s best to be upfront and honest. I promise.”

  “I can’t,” I sputtered.

  “You think you’re protecting them, but you’re not.” Her voice remained even toned, her words confident. No sound of a plea. “Secrets and lies only lead to mistakes. Misunderstandings. Bloodshed.”

  Another cold shiver rolled across my skin. “And everyone knows your secrets?”

  “Of course not.” She arched a brow. “But I’m not you. And I’m okay with a little bloodshed.”

  “What makes you think I’m not?” I challenged, my voice weak.

  “You share Sebastian’s blood, but that’s where it ends.”

  “And that means?” I asked as she stood.

  Her hands went to her curvaceous hips. She was stunning. Blunt and a bit brash, but I liked her. And I was pretty sure I was going to need her to help get me through this.

  “You’re not like him, and I don’t think you need to be. Stay true to yourself. Don’t let whatever happened to you in Russia change who you are. Don’t give that place or Luca any control over who you are today.”

  It was too late. The damage was done. There was no turning back.

  “Move on. Become stronger. Better.” She let her hands fall from her hips.

  Now, more than ever, I knew I couldn’t move on. Not until Luca paid for what he did, for what he made me do.

  “I sound callous and horrible, I know. But this is who I am.” Her eyes went to the ceiling for a moment. “Sebastian has to live with the fact he was friends with Luca for years, even while that man had you locked away in a prison. Shitty stuff happens. Then even shittier stuff after that.”

  My body went cold. The Upstate New York kind. But I leaned back against the headboard, forgetting the bruises as I contemplated her words. “Learn from it and move on?”

  “Or take your revenge first, then move on.” She was serious, wasn’t she?

  “But as I told you, you’re not like Sebastian.”

  Maybe she was wrong. Maybe I was more like him than I wanted to admit.

  * * *

  “I think we might need to get you out of Dublin.”

  My eyes widened at my brother’s words. “What?”

  It was one in the morning, only a few hours since I’d been attacked, and my brother refused to leave. Holly was still here, too.

  Cole had yet to return from wherever Sebastian had sent him. Emilia left after she’d given me the all-clear, but her words kept pinging around in my head on repeat.

  “You remember what happened when you sent me to Sicily,” I reminded Sebastian as he paced back and forth in front of the windows in the living room.

  Holly was across from me in one of the yellow armchairs, her lips downturned. Her eyes on the glass of bourbon in her hand.

  As soon as my brother turned to face me, with guilt in his eyes and his shoulders sagging, I wanted to take back my words. I didn’t blame him for what Luca did to me, but I knew he blamed himself, so it was a low blow for me to bring up Sicily.

  “You were trying to keep me safe by sending me away.” I rose on shaky legs and gripped my side to help ease the pain from the punches I’d received there. “But the safest place for me is near you.”

  He huffed out a breath and strode across the room to stand next to Holly. When she reached for his hand, his wedding band caught my eye, and I found myself lost in a daze.

  My brother was married to Cole’s cousin.

  It was still hard for me to believe.

  Sebastian wasn’t generally demonstrative with his emotions. He told me he loved me only after he’d rescued me from the prison and never a day before. He hadn’t been able to get the words out. Falling in love with Holly was the best thing to happen to him.

  Sebastian pulled his hand free from Holly’s to cross his arms. He was delivering his signature pensive stare. One meant to intimidate. “We should move back here and stay in the other room.”

  “No!” I was quick to respond. “Absolutely not. I will not have you uprooting your lives just to babysit me.”

  Sebastian’s lips parted, but before he could speak, Holly said, “You’re important to the both of us. We want to be here for you.”

  “Alessia,” Sebastian hissed.

  And why did everyone say my name like that? Stamped with pity.

  “You’re not moving in with me. That’s non-negotiable.” I’d never get a moment to breathe with my brother in the other room. And I sure as hell didn’t want to cramp their sex life.

  “There’s no one else I trust to live with you except—” Sebastian cut himself off when his lids lifted to reveal stormy dark eyes. “Cole,” he finished.

  Holly stood next to Sebastian and hooked her arm with his, an attempt to be the calm one in the room. Thank God for her. “The other presidential suite on the floor is empty, right? He could stay next door,” she suggested.

  “No, that’s not good enough,” Sebastian replied without taking a second to consider the option.

  “Look, you’re going to add a passcode to access this level by elevator or the stairs. I’m safe in my room.”

  “And I should have done that already.” Sebastian turned his back, and Holly’s arm fell to her side with his absence.

  Before the attack, I would have been fine with Cole moving in. I’d already started to let my walls down, and that kiss between us changed everything, but after what happened tonight—I didn’t know what to think.

  “Emilia, what about her?” I wasn’t sure if I could handle any more of her brutal honesty, but she knew most of my secrets already, so it made the most sense.

  “Emilia will stay with you as planned when Cole and I go to London.” He huffed. “I would cancel the trip if I could, but it’s more important now than ever to ensure The Alliance is sticking to our pact.” He faced me. “Cole stays with you.”

  “But—”

  “This is non-negotiable.” Great, my brother was using my own words against me. “Cole needs to take down these men who attacked you. Make a statement.” His voice was gravelly, the words fierce.

  I took two quick steps his way with a raised palm
. “I don’t want him killing anyone. He can’t become that man.” I was about to fall to my knees and beg if I had to.

  I couldn’t let Cole cross that line. It would forever change him.

  “There are alternatives to death.” Sebastian’s brows drew together. “You know we don’t kill people unless we have no choice.”

  “And you had no choice when it came to the men you believed burned me alive in your home in Paris?” I challenged.

  Sebastian’s eyes darted to his hands as if he were remembering the knife he’d held when he slaughtered the human traffickers and nearly died himself that night.

  I shouldn’t have brought that up, though. He’d also saved people that night—the victims who’d fallen prey to the traffickers. And, even though I didn’t have the courage to tell my brother the whole truth yet, in a strange twist of fate, his actions did save me. “That was different,” Sebastian answered. “And you’re alive, but these men need to pay for their crimes.”

  Holly looked at me, a plea in her eyes to back down. To let her try and lead Sebastian away from the cliff he was standing on. The “devil” fell for an angel, so maybe she could make sure he didn’t lose his new wings.

  Compared to Luca, my brother was, in fact, an angel.

  But that didn’t mean I wouldn’t do my absolute best to prevent Cole from ever killing.

  “Those guys were just looking to steal from me.” I’d lied easily this time, my acting skills improving tonight.

  Sebastian tucked his hands into the pockets of his black jeans, which he’d paired with a plain black sweater and dark boots. Not the lace-up kind, but the expensive leather ones with a side zipper.

  Why the hell was I thinking about shoes right now? Oh yeah, it was preferable to remembering the reality of my situation.

  “I’m sorry. This kind of thing can’t happen without consequences. No woman should be attacked on the street like that. Period. But you’re my sister, and that’s equivalent to a declaration of war.” Sebastian cocked his head, lips drawn together. His eyes went to the door at the sound of a knock. “Should be Cole now.”