West of Want (Hearts of the Anemoi)

by Laura Kaye

  “Because I am falling for you, Ella, and I’d like nothing more than to make you fall for me in return.”

  Oh, God, she’d needed his words like water, like oxygen. She turned her face against his, the short-trimmed whiskers on his jaw rubbing her cheekbone, and met his gaze. “Is that true, Zeph? I know you’re a god, and I’m just a human. But please don’t toy with me.”

  “Ella, you’re not just anything. And I promise you the respect of my honesty, in all things.”

  Relief rushed through her veins in a torrent and she turned within his arms. Their lips met in a kiss that was full of affection and forgiveness.

  Between them, her stomach growled obnoxiously. Zeph pulled away from the kiss with a smile. Ella’s face went hot. “I’ve got great timing.”

  Zeph cupped her cheeks. “Are we okay?”

  Expression earnest, eyes pleading, there was only one answer she could give. “Yes. We’re okay.”

  Relief and happiness colored his expression. “Thank you.”

  Ella raised on tiptoes to kiss his lips, her heart sprinting as words formed in her mind. She took a deep breath. “And Zeph? I’m glad for why you stayed. And what you hoped to do…it’s already working.”

  One side of his mouth lifted higher in a smile that was both happy and sexy. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, I like the sound of that.”

  She nodded. “So, can I make you something for breakfast, er, I guess lunch, now?”

  “That’d be great.” With one last squeeze, Zeph released her from his embrace.

  “Honestly, I’m not sure what I have. I haven’t been to the store in a while.” She turned to the fridge and opened the door. Slim pickings. “I have some leftover pizza. And I have eggs, so I could make omelets or pancakes. Or I could order something. What’s your pleasure?” When he didn’t answer, she glanced over her shoulder.

  Zeph’s eyes flashed at her. She arched an eyebrow, and he grinned. She chuckled. “Food first. Now, what do you want?” His eyebrows flew up, his whole face amused now. “You’re incorrigible. To eat. What do you want to eat?”

  “Pancakes?”

  “Sure, but I really can order some food. Or we could go out.”

  “No, pancakes, please,” he said with more certainty. “I’ve just never had them.”

  Ella halted and looked at him. “Really? Well, then, pancakes it will be.” She moved around, pulling out utensils and ingredients. Zeph settled his butt against the counter and crossed his arms. His eyes alighted on her movements like a physical caress. It was nice, this sense of companionship.

  An idea came to her and she grinned. “Do you like chocolate?”

  “Yeah.”

  She reached up into her junk food stash and grabbed the bag of plain M&Ms. “How about some M&M pancakes?” She hadn’t made them in forever, but Marcus had always loved them.

  “I’ve never had them.”

  “M&Ms?”

  “No.”

  Ella froze. “So, wait, you’ve never had pancakes or M&Ms? What do they feed you guys up there, or…you know, wherever?”

  He shrugged. “Food is bountiful where I live.”

  “Maybe, but no M&Ms is a huge oversight.” She crossed the room to him and fished two out of the bag. Green ones, naturally. “You need to file a complaint with the management. Open.”

  That odd but utterly sexy light flared up behind his eyes. She grinned when his lips parted. She placed them on his tongue, purposely letting her fingers brush his bottom lip when she pulled away.

  He chewed and his eyes went wide.

  “More?”

  He nodded.

  She grabbed a few more and held them out to him. He opened his mouth. Her heart kicked up as she fed him again. “Good, right?”

  “They’re crunchy, and then they’re soft.”

  “Yeah. Exactly.”

  He dug his big hand into the bag, then his heated gaze cut to her. “Open.”

  Ella licked her lips and opened them. He brought the candy to her mouth and she wrapped her lips around his fingers, totally relishing the desire that colored his face.

  He pulled his fingers away. She’d barely swallowed before he was on her, his lips pressed against hers, his tongue begging for entrance. She opened and welcomed him in. Oh. God. He tasted of chocolate and spice. The combination pulled the rug out from under her and she had to grip onto his biceps to counter the spinning of the room.

  After long moments, he pulled away. “I like M&Ms.”

  She chuckled. Joy and humor bloomed in her chest, and her eyes watered. She wiped the tears away and grinned at Zeph, whose face was bright and happy now. “I’m glad,” she managed, chuckles still bubbling up. “So, I take it M&M pancakes sound good?”

  He nodded and rubbed his hands together. And as it turned out, pancake making had never been more fun. It was sort of a one-M&M-for-Zeph, one-M&M-for-the-pancakes kinda process. But she wouldn’t have had it any other way. She glanced up at him as she flipped a cake. “You know, I must really like you to share my M&Ms. I’m kinda addicted.”

  He leaned down and nuzzled her throat. “Is that so?”

  She nodded and tilted her head away, opening her neck to his exploration. “Pancake,” she whispered after a moment. Zeph pulled away, a smile on his lips. She scooped it off the griddle and placed it on the growing stack.

  A couple more poured, flipped, and stacked, and they settled at the table together and dug in. “Now, since you’re a novice here, I’m advising you to just go with a bit of butter and skip the syrup. Let the chocolate do its thing all on its own. But, that’s totally up to you.” She pointed at the bottle of syrup and shrugged.

  Zeph picked up his fork and his eyes darted to the bottle, but he sliced into the sweet breading sans syrup, just like she suggested. He blew on the forkful a few times and then his eyes went wide as he chewed. “It’s melty.”

  Ella had smiled so much this morning, her cheeks ached, but it was wonderful and so needed. “I know,” she said. “That’s the beauty of it.”

  They occasionally made small talk as they ate, but even the silence was companionable and pleasant.

  It’s gonna hurt when he’s gone.

  The thought broadsided her. Damn. Why couldn’t she just trust in what he’d said? She thought she did. She wanted to. But clearly a part of her was hanging on to the worst-case scenario. He deserved better than that. He’d been completely honest with her, and hadn’t given her a single reason to question him or his motives. She released a deep breath and pushed her empty plate away.

  Zeph leaned back and rubbed his stomach over the gray shirt.

  She let herself soak in his satisfaction, the way he was looking at her with such appreciation. She had to give herself a break. Craig’s damage ran deep, so she was going to get tripped up, but Zeph wasn’t Craig.

  “Thank you, Ella. I really enjoyed that. And it’s been eons since another prepared me a good meal with such care.”

  His words chased away most of her angst. She ducked her head. “I’m glad.”

  Fingers tugged at her chin. “Don’t hide from me.”

  Ella felt the heat roar up her face. “I…uh…” She shook her head. “I don’t mean to. I’m just out of practice with compliments.” She rolled the edge of the napkin to distract herself from the intensity of his gaze.

  “Well, we’ll have to work on that, because when I look at you, I see quite a bit to praise.”

  She smiled and fought the urge to squirm. “Okay.” Pressing a kiss into his palm, Ella breathed him in, then scooped the plates from the table and rose. As she settled them into the sink, arms surrounded her.

  “I’m serious, Ella.” He kissed her neck. “No one’s treated me like you do for a very long time.”

  She twisted to face him, and his arms braced against the sink on either side of her. “Why, Zeph? What happened?” Her hands fell against the warmth of his broad chest.

  His eyes searched her fa
ce. “It’s a very long story.”

  “Will you tell it to me sometime?” Ella’s stomach squeezed. Would they have the time to learn all those stories of personal history that couples learned through weeks and months of dating?

  “If you want to hear it, yes,” he said, his face resuming the pensive, troubled expression he often wore.

  “I’m interested in hearing everything about you. And like you said last night, not just the good stuff.”

  He closed his eyes for a brief second, then leaned in to kiss her. It was soft and chaste, and just a prelude to a hug that was full of the need for comfort. Ella gladly gave it, her throat now tight at the emotion silently pouring out of him.

  She hated whatever it was that weighed so heavily upon him, and wondered what she could do to lift his spirits. When it came, the idea was perfect—providing the friend who owed her a favor was game to help out.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Zephyros couldn’t remember the last time someone had attempted to surprise him. That is, surprise him with something good, with a gift, with kindness. He’d many times been caught off-guard by betrayal and hurt. You’d think his godhood would protect him against those moments, but instead, his nature seemed to make him a ripe target.

  As Ella bounded down the stairs, she was nearly vibrating with energy. Zephyros was delighted to see her so alive, the flush of enthusiasm and happiness coloring her face.

  “You ready?” she asked.

  He chuckled. “I don’t know. Am I?”

  She smoothed her hands over his T-shirt. “You are. Trust me. This is going to be great. But are you sure you don’t want a jacket? I’ve got lots of Marcus’s things still around.”

  But Zeph’s mind strayed on Trust me. The words put his body at odds—his stomach braced at the idea of fully trusting, while his heart chided the reaction and insisted Ella was trustworthy, perhaps more so than anyone he’d ever known. Unlike the gods and goddesses he knew, she had no motivation to manipulate and deceive. Or so he hoped.

  “No, this is my weather. I’ll be fine,” he said with a shaky smile. “Now, you lead. I’ll follow.”

  “Ooh, I like the sound of that. Come on.”

  Soaking in some of that odd, peaceful influence she radiated, he met her smiling eyes and felt his shoulders relax. Having been around her consistently, it didn’t impact him as forcefully as it first had, but it was still there. Still powerful. Still something he could dip into when he needed, like ladling a refreshing drink from a cool spring brook. If it hadn’t felt so nice, he’d probably have been wary. What was it about her? He was the god and she the human, yet she very clearly affected him physically and psychically.

  He followed her out the front door and waited while she locked up, then squeezed himself into the passenger seat of her small car. His knees nearly hit the dashboard, even with the seat pushed back.

  She laughed as she started the engine. “Sorry it’s such a tight fit. I love my Prius, though. And it was a great car for living in the city.” She patted his knee and backed out of her driveway. “Don’t worry. It’s a short trip.”

  He grabbed her hand and held it against his leg. “I don’t mind.” His gaze landed on another vehicle under a tarp at the top of the driveway next to the house. “But I have to ask. What’s under there?” He pointed at the covering.

  “Oh. It was my brother’s car. A Solstice. He left it to me.” She shrugged and looked away. “Along with the house and stuff.”

  Zeph turned his head to her. “You own a car called a Solstice?” Along with the equinoxes, the solstices were two of the most powerful days of the year, when the veil between the human and divine realms was thinnest. The make of car was just a coincidence, surely, but where Ella was concerned, those seemed to be piling up: her powerful aura, her praise of March—the month for which he was surnamed, and now a car named after the day that marked the passing of seasons…

  “Yeah,” she said, her words pulling him from his thoughts. “It’s really fast, too. We can take it out sometime if you like.”

  He gripped her hand and cursed himself for seeing intrigue where there was none. “Anything, with you.”

  Her cheeks went pink, and it was lovely. “Glad to hear that. Because I’m hoping you’ll like what I’ve got planned.” She pulled onto her street and navigated between the parked cars on both sides, chattering about the neighborhood and pointing out landmarks as they drove. Cool sunshine filtered down through the tree-covered street.

  A sign out the passenger side caught Zeph’s eye. He froze. “Ella?”

  “And over here is my marina. Horn Point. I love that it’s walking distance to the boat. That was actually why Marcus bought the house here.”

  “Ella?”

  She turned to him. “Yeah?”

  “Please tell me I’m reading the street signs wrong.” And that this one is just a coincidence.

  She craned around to see what he was talking about. “What do you mean?” The car slowed as it approached a stop sign at the end of the next block. The crisscrossed green street signs read “2nd Street / Eastern Avenue.”

  “You live on Eastern Avenue?”

  “Yeah.”

  “In the neighborhood of Eastport.” He studied her face as she turned onto 2nd, thinking out loud now. “On the east side of this town.”

  She frowned and shrugged. “Yeah. Why?”

  He shook his head as unease snaked into his gut. Just another coincidence. Had to be. A totally not-meaningful coincidence that the woman he was falling for had this strange, wonderful power over how he felt and had all these associations with the East and turned out to be infertile just as Eurus was trying to force him into making an heir. Damn, if that didn’t have his brother’s twisted sense of humor all over it.

  A pit of suspicion rooted in his mind. He hated it, but it wouldn’t be beyond Eurus. Maybe the whole warning drama had been for show, meant to push Zeph toward what Eurus wanted by telling him to stay away. And then he followed up with this ridiculous ticking-clock ultimatum involving a woman he knew couldn’t conceive. If Zeph’s fears were true, either way Eurus had boxed him in—to giving up the woman he loved on the one hand, or giving up an heir on the other.

  Thunder rumbled low and long in the distance.

  “Geez, I hope it doesn’t storm again.” Ella glanced out window. “Oh, and that is one of my favorite restaurants,” she said, continuing the tour without realizing the turmoil roiling within Zeph. “Maybe we can go there.” Short minutes later she pulled into a parking lot and announced with a big smile, “We’re here.”

  “Okay,” he said, peering out the windshield.

  She hopped out of the car, still full of that energy he’d earlier found so remarkable. He got out of the car and surveyed his surroundings, though nothing setting off a particular warning.

  She grabbed his hand and tugged. “This way. Come on.”

  Zeph followed, less enthusiastic than before. He had to be wrong, had to be overreacting. Give her the benefit of the doubt. He just wasn’t sure how much more of that he had left in him.

  They rounded a brick wall and crossed a circular drive leading to a hotel lobby.

  “It’s just through here,” she said.

  Zeph’s eyes scanned the milling people in the lobby and the old photographs of seamen and sailors. Ella kept them moving forward until they left the building again and stepped out into a gusting spring breeze over the water. The bay lapped against the pilings and rocked the hull of a huge sailboat docked there.

  “Surprise!” she called, holding her free hand out toward the boat.

  Zeph looked from her to the sailboat and back. “We’re going sailing?”

  She hopped once, her smile brilliant, even brighter than the sun falling on her face.

  “Yes. Just because my boat’s out of commission doesn’t mean I can’t take you out. Plus, if I’m not the one sailing, I get to just relax and be with you. So it’s win-win! What d’ya think?”

&nbs
p; He felt the smile on his lips despite the unwanted doubt in the back of his mind. Here she was sharing a part of herself with him, and all he could do was look for the other shoe to drop. He cleared his throat. “I love this, Ella. Thank you.”

  She squeezed his hand. “Oh, good. I was hoping you would say that. Come on.” Tugging him to the roped gangway, Ella waved to a man on board. “Kyle!”

  A thin man in a baseball hat turned and smiled. “Ella, welcome.” He unclasped the ropes on both ends of the boarding plank. “Come aboard. Come aboard.”

  Ella released Zeph’s hand and made her way across, then shook the man’s hand. “What luck that you were going out today. Thanks for letting us tag along.”

  “Well, it was an easy favor to grant. Besides, I can always use an extra set of skilled hands.”

  “Kyle, I want you to meet my friend, Zeph.” She turned her smile on Zeph. “Zeph, this is Captain Kyle. He owns the Woodwind. Well, both of them. This is actually the Woodwind II. He agreed to take us out on his safety-check run. His season doesn’t start for about two weeks, so we got really lucky.”

  Kyle extended a hand and a kind, open countenance. “Nice to meet you. Welcome aboard.”

  Zeph nodded. “Likewise. Beautiful boat.” Zeph followed Ella and Kyle back toward the boat’s cockpit, where a huge silver captain’s wheel shined in the cool sunlight. A light crew moved around the deck, and Ella pitched in whenever Kyle asked her to do something. Zeph watched her work, watched her strong body stretch and lift. Her competence was a total turn-on. And before long, they were underway.

  “Let’s sit here,” she said to him after a few moments, a happy flush coloring her cheeks. “I met Kyle through Marcus. The sailing community in Annapolis is both big and way too small.” She laughed. “Everyone seems to know each other.” Grabbing Zeph’s hand again, she asked, “Are you sure you’re warm enough? It’s still pretty chilly.”