Dark Goddess

by Amalie Howard

  Her smile felt wobbly. “Is it you?”

  “Of course it is. Who else would it be?”

  “Why was Azrath here before?”

  Nate’s green eyes widened. “No way! Uncle Az? As in Dad’s psychopath brother?”

  Sera almost laughed at his incredulous tone, and she nodded. “One and the same. Trust me, I’m as surprised as you are.” Her eyes narrowed. “It is really you, isn’t it, Nate?”

  He shrugged. “A version of me, I guess.”

  “Who were the girls from before?”

  “Versions of you, maybe?”

  She sucked in a gasp and frowned, recalling their odd coloring. It made sense, she supposed, one for each side of her—the light and the dark. Nate plopped to the ground and Sera followed him, sitting cross-legged and facing him.

  “You really got worked, didn’t you?” he commented.

  “What do you mean?” she asked, and he nodded to her torso. Her eyes fell on the gaping wound in the center of her ribcage that discolored her clothing with crusted blood. She hadn’t even realized it was there. She touched the ragged edges gingerly and winced at the soreness. “Still hurts.”

  “Not surprised,” he said with an empathetic shrug. “That Kira, wow, she’s like those girls from MMA. I’m surprised you lasted as long as you did.”

  Sera shot him a dark look. “Hey! I can hold my own.”

  “Yeah, but she’s Kali. As in the totally renegade warrior goddess who’ll bring the rain on all the baddies.”

  Sera snorted beneath her breath. “She’s not all that. And I stopped her, didn’t I?”

  “You kind of died,” he said with a pointed stare to the hole in her chest.

  “But I’m not really dead, am I?”

  Nate pursed his lips. “That depends.”

  “On what?” she asked.

  “On whether you want to return to me, or to the realms. The choice is in your hands. You are, after all, at the crossroads. You can return as you are, or you can be reborn anew.”

  Something occurred to her after a moment, as she stared at her brother’s eyes. It felt like Nate, but she knew it wasn’t really him. Too much age-old wisdom swirled in those bright-green, all-seeing eyes. No, this wasn’t Nate. It was something far bigger—something that could only take shape within her own meager capacity for understanding.

  It made a bizarre sort of sense. She had seen her uncle because he had died at her hands, and a part of her thought she deserved death for that. But now she was seeing Nate because she wanted to live. And Nate’s was a form that made her feel safe.

  “What will happen if I choose to go back?” she asked.

  “A part of you has died, and you will have to live with that.”

  She frowned at his cryptic words. “A part of me,” she echoed, fear curdling in her chest. Had the good part of her died? Would she be forced to remain in Xibalba for the rest of her days? Away from her family and everyone she loved? She’d rather be dead. Or wander the glade forever, like Azrath.

  “Which part?” she asked hoarsely.

  “The part that was destroyed by a weapon of Illysia.”

  He reached for her right hand, and Sera gasped at the rawness of the connection between them. Sudden awareness flooded her mind as her consciousness jolted awake. Her life appeared in a series of flashes—her loved ones, her actions, her hopes and dreams—and she felt herself intertwined with the very fabric of the universe. Nate’s thumb stroked over the fleshy part beneath her thumb and the skin there tingled. She glanced down, her mouth parting in surprise.

  The rune that had always been there—the rune of Xibalba—had disappeared.

  “So I’m no longer tied to the Dark Realms?” she asked slowly, blessed relief flooding her.

  “No.”

  She couldn’t contain her delight. “That’s good, right?”

  “It is how you want to see it,” he replied, waving a hand. “You will no longer be able to go there, or to control the demands of Xibalba, or to see into the hearts of those that rule in the Dark Realms. You will become a true goddess of Illysia.”

  “Is it selfish to want that?” she asked in a small voice.

  “No,” he said, taking her other hand and stroking the rune that lay there. Dev’s rune. Her heart trembled at the thought of him, and Nate smiled. “You are so young, with so much ahead of you. I couldn’t ask you to give that up. Not when you have already sacrificed so much.”

  He rose, and she stood with him. “What about the Demon Lords and the KaliYuga?”

  “Darkness will always plot to defeat the light, my child. As a goddess of Illysia, you will only have to become more vigilant.”

  Sera squeezed his hand. “You’re Brahman, aren’t you?”

  “I am your brother,” he replied with a crooked smile that made her long to see her family. “And your mother. I am your father, your friends, your love, your life. I am you.” He bowed and pressed the tips of his palms together at his brow. “Let us see you home, Serjana.”

  After all the silence of the glade, the noise seemed thunderous. Voices buzzed around her. Motion caught her eyes behind her closed eyelids. Her heart thumped painfully in her chest and wheezing breaths filled her lungs.

  She was alive.

  It hurt like hell.

  Even with her eyes shut, everything was so bright that Sera could hardly focus. Her body felt warm, and she could feel small, gentle hands pressing against her chest. The heat she felt was coming from those hands. Soothing the broken parts of her. Healing her.

  “Stand back,” her mother’s voice said. “Something’s happening.”

  Sera’s eyelids flipped open. She was no longer floating in a lake filled with petals. Dully, she took in the rose-colored walls and the familiar smell of lavender that made her old, tired heart take comfort. She was lying on a bed in a room, one that looked like the bedroom in a house she remembered somewhere deep in her memories. It was her bedroom, she realized, as the furnishings took shape.

  Sera felt like a newborn, seeing things with fresh eyes and feeling things for the first time. Blinking away her bewilderment, she focused on the faces swimming in her vision. Faces of those she knew and loved, watching her—her mother, her brother leaning over her, her father. Kyle, standing off to the side, hand in hand with Kira, unabashed tears leaking down his face.

  And Dev. Her love. Her heart.

  His golden eyes held hers, so much wisdom and love eddying in them. His fingers grazed the backs of hers, the touch igniting a slew of memories to burst like fireworks in her brain.

  “Hey,” he said, his hand rising to caress her cheek.

  She leaned into it, her eyes feathering shut for a moment. “Hi.”

  “How are you feeling?”

  A rueful smile shaped her lips. “Like I died.”

  Laughter filtered through the room as Dev’s hand resumed its possessive grip on hers, caressing it gently. “You almost did. Nate saved you.”

  Sera’s stare fell to her brother, Nate, whose palms still rested on her chest. A faint glow surrounded them where they touched her skin. His bright, tearful, green eyes met hers. “Hey, buddy. Thanks for not letting me go.”

  He threw himself down over her with a sob. “Don’t ever do that again, okay?”

  “You got it.” She laughed through her own tears. “After all, who else is going to keep your head from getting swollen when you hit it big in Hollywood?”

  Nate giggled, his eyes meeting hers as he straightened. She smiled, seeing the one who had sent her back in their brilliant, childlike depths.

  Brahman.

  The one imbued in all things.

  She drew a slow breath, feeling her chest rise as the air filled her lungs. Mesmerized, she did it again. It was amazing how one single thing could make her feel so achingly alive when she had been so near death before. When she’d been impaled by a weapon not of this earth.

  Her gaze slid to where Nate’s fingers had been. There was no gaping wound, but tha
t wasn’t what shocked the breath out of her. It was her deifyre, flaring to life and flickering like a glittering shroud. It was no longer red, but an iridescent, silvery gold. Like her mother’s. Like Dev’s. She had thought it had been a dream. Or wishful thinking.

  “Mom,” she croaked.

  “I’m here, honey,” Sophia said, her damp eyes crinkling at the corners. “You had us worried for a while. Are you okay?”

  Sera nodded, her consciousness starting to resettle into itself. “I went for a walk. Spoke to Brahman.”

  Her mother’s eyes went wide as she gasped. “Brahman?”

  “At least, I think it was him. But he looked a lot like Nate.” She paused, a sigh escaping her lips. “And Uncle Azrath.”

  “Azrath?” This time the gasp was from her father.

  “It wasn’t bad,” Sera said, throwing him a reassuring look. “It was brief. I don’t even know that it was really him. I think it was my subconscious dealing with my part in his death, and understanding my own, and the part karma plays in our evolution. He was my greatest sin. I took a life, even if it was for the greater good. But then I saw Nate.” Her gaze flicked to her brother who still stood at her side. “And he told me that I had a choice.”

  “I did?” Nate asked, wide-eyed.

  “Well, not you, but the you in my head,” she said with a smile. “You told me I could return or be reborn.” She took in each of the faces she loved in turn. “And I wasn’t ready to leave any of you just yet.”

  “Oh, honey.” Her mother leaned down to kiss her forehead. “I was so worried you’d been taken somewhere else. And after what Nate had seen, I was terrified that it would come true.” Fear flicked across her face, and Sera understood exactly where it was Sophia had thought she had gone.

  “Turns out Nate was right,” she said. “A part of me did die. Kira’s weapon killed the part of me that was linked to the Dark Realms.”

  “Sorry about that,” Kira interjected with a wry grin. “I was kind of out of it.”

  “No apology needed. It was because of you that we were able to defeat Aranyasura,” Sera said gently before turning back to her mother. “And I wasn’t sent to Xibalba. I was at some kind of crossroads.” She inhaled deeply, recalling the surreal feel of the realm. “They called it the glade.”

  “I have heard of such a place,” a male voice said. “It is the space between the bones of creation and destruction. A realm beyond realms.”

  A boy with dark hair piled on his head and a blue-inked neck stood at the far end of the room near the doorway. Taran. Or Shiva. Sera frowned as she recalled Kyle and Kira’s linked hands, but Taran didn’t look concerned. Amusement filled her as she wondered whether he’d been secretly relieved that he hadn’t had to stop her rampage a second time. His eyes met hers, as if he knew exactly what she was thinking, and he winked.

  Sera felt relieved. She wouldn’t want Kyle to be hurt, especially now that he had declared himself. Finally.

  Dev squeezed her fingers. “Go on. What happened in this realm beyond realms?”

  “I saw myself there,” Sera explained, lifting her right hand to display the unblemished skin. “The two halves of me. I could have kept them together, but I chose to let one go.”

  Sophia frowned. “So you’re not tied to Xibalba?”

  “Not anymore.”

  Sophia gasped. “What does that mean? For you? For everyone?”

  “It means I can no longer go to Xibalba.” She met her best friend’s eyes and she grinned. “As much as I’ll miss our adventures, I’m definitely not going to miss the smell. Or the demons.”

  “Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but don’t think you’re getting away so easily,” Kyle said. “Demons are still running rampant in the Mortal Realm.”

  “I think I can handle that.”

  “But what does this mean for you as the conduit?” Sophia pushed.

  Sera knew what her mother was getting at. She wanted to know whether her changed status as a goddess of all three realms would mean that the Demon Lords would run unchallenged. “I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “Brahman said we would have to be extra vigilant.”

  “And we will,” her father said with a determined smile. “Together.”

  Nate’s palm slipped into her free hand, his right hand joining their mother’s, who reached for Sera’s father’s. The linking of their palms went on, joining Kyle’s, Kira’s, Taran’s, and back to Dev, who hadn’t let go of hers since she had awakened. Sera’s heart was so full she could barely breathe.

  “Together,” she agreed.

  EPILOGUE

  “I swear, my arteries are bursting just looking at these hash browns,” Kira muttered, her fork sifting through the pile of food on her plate.

  “You know, you’re immortal. You probably don’t have to worry about cholesterol,” Kyle commented drily, reaching over to shove a forkful of her greasy potatoes into his mouth.

  “You’re such a glutton.”

  “Azura Lord,” he said, beating his chest and smacking his lips before stealing another heaping portion.

  She arched an eyebrow. “A little glutton lord.”

  “Good thing you like me,” he said, leaning in to kiss her with a mouthful of potato as she fought him off with a disgusted laugh.

  Sera stared at her two friends, in their usual booth at Sal’s diner, trying to suppress her own grin. “The grease is what makes it so good,” she affirmed. “Don’t knock it till you try it.”

  “Years and years of stuck-on grease,” Kyle said and drummed his fingers on the tabletop. “I don’t think Big Jim ever cleans that grill.”

  Kira grimaced. “Ew, gross.”

  “You know, for such a bad-to-the-bone berserker goddess, you’re kind of squeamish.” Kyle leaned back, patting his stomach contentedly.

  “Darika has a far stronger constitution than me.” She eyed him with an arch look. “Maybe you picked the wrong sister.”

  “Not a chance.” He reached for her again, and this time Sera had to avert her eyes at the overt PDA. She cleared her throat.

  “Sorry,” Kira said, though she was clearly unrepentant. “So what are your plans later? You want to come hang out with us? A little demon hunting in the woods? Kyle said the Ne’feri found some kind of nest. Might be Temlucus back to his old tricks.”

  Sera shook her head. “I have plans.”

  “If you say studying,” Kyle said with a groan, “I’m going to puke.”

  Sera grinned. “We have finals next week, in case you forgot.”

  “Yeah, in a busted-up school.”

  “It’s fine. Knightsbrook Academy is lending us their auditorium,” she reminded him.

  The destruction at Silver Lake High had been blamed on a senior prank—something involving fireworks—gone horribly wrong. As far as excuses went, it wasn’t the worst. Repairs to the gymnasium were still ongoing, but that didn’t mean that school would stop. That saying about death and taxes being the only certain things in life needed to be amended to include school. If high school didn’t grind to a halt in the wake of a cosmic war between gods and demons, Sera didn’t know what would ever stop it.

  He rolled his eyes. “Let me guess. Dev had something to do with offering up his old alma mater? Not that he has to go back to school,” Kyle grumbled, banging on his chest. “Seriously. Azura Lord. Why do I need high school?”

  “Because you promised Carla.”

  He sunk down into the booth, dejected. “Right.”

  “Stop being such a baby,” Kira teased him, earning herself a disgruntled look. “And there’s a silver lining. I can help you study. With incentives.”

  Kyle’s eyes brightened at the offer. “Have I told you lately how into you I am?”

  Laughing, she fended off his advances and stood, tossing several bills on the table. Shrugging into her coat, she turned back to Sera. “So, you were saying something about plans? And seriously, Kyle’s right. If it’s studying, I’m nixing that right now. You need to
come with and let some steam out.”

  “Yeah,” Kyle agreed. “What she said.”

  Sera drew a breath as they exited the diner, waving to Big Jim, who scowled at her. Some things, like Big Jim’s humor, would never change—even though so much else had—and she was grateful for that. It made her feel grounded.

  Normal.

  She smiled. As normal as her world could ever be.

  Kira nodded to the surly owner as she walked past and, surprise of surprises, his lips stretched into something that almost looked like a smile. Sera and Kyle gaped.

  “What?” Kira asked, her brow vaulting at their twin expressions of astonishment. “Big Jim? He’s Sanrak.”

  “He’s what?” Kyle spluttered.

  “How do you think we kept track of you two for so long?” Kira said with a grin. “We had an inside man. And don’t mind him. He’s all teeth and no bite. A big softie, really—kind of like my boyfriend here,” she teased.

  Kyle gave a playful growl. “I’ll show you some bite.”

  Laughing, Sera shook her head in disbelief. She never would have pegged Big Jim as a warrior deity, but well, guardians came in all forms and sizes. She glanced at him over her shoulder and met his eyes, the hint of a smile still lurking in them. He bowed his head in the barest of acknowledgments, and Sera nodded back.

  Wonders would never cease.

  Outside, the sun was warm and she lifted her eyes upward, watching the clouds drift across a perfect blue sky.

  “Dev’s meeting me in a minute,” she said. “He’s taking me to Illysia.”

  The residual humor disappeared from Kyle’s face as he met her eyes. He nodded, as if he could read every emotion in her heart.

  “So, are you okay with that?” he asked quietly.

  “I think so.”

  It had been weeks, and even though Dev had offered to take her before, she’d been resistant. Nervous. Afraid, even. But now, it was time.

  “Well, see you on the flip side,” Kyle said before pulling her into a bear hug.

  Kira shot them a dry look as she climbed into Kyle’s car. “Trust me, Illysia is not all it’s cracked up to be. They take sin really seriously. Like one time, I used Darika’s boots, and they called it stealing.” She rolled her eyes, a wicked glint in them. “I did put them back a year later. So technically it was only borrowing.” She threw her hands into the air, warming to her subject. “And if we’re really getting technical, we’re the same person, so I was stealing from myself.”