Time For Love Box Set

by Karen Deen

  This woman sitting in front of me is amazing. I’m the woman putting her son through hell, yet she holds my hand and comforts me. I want to ask why but I think I get it. I’m Sophia thirty-odd years ago. She sees her life being playing out again and wants to give me guidance. What a special person she is.

  “Before I go, I just want to say this. Do not stop or ever give up that dream. It will kill you on the inside and kill any relationship you and Grant may have. He’s made the decision to walk away and let you grow. So, do it. Fly high and then come home to my patient boy when you’re done. He will keep the fire burning for you. Don’t ever doubt for one moment how he feels about you. More importantly, he should know how you feel about him. If he doesn’t believe you love him, then he wouldn’t be doing this. He would never wait.”

  “Go and smash that audition because I’m going to be one of the first people to buy tickets to your show and I will be sitting front row with two very cocky, hot Stevenson men. Okay?”

  The tears are no longer silent. They’re big and loud. It all comes out. Sophia pulls me in for a mom hug and I cry on her shoulder. It’s a gesture to say she knows what I’m going through and is here to help. I just have to keep focus and keep believing my life will turn out the way it’s supposed to, just like hers did.

  “What’s going on over here?” Mitch’s deep voice breaks the silence. “Geesus, woman, I leave you alone for five minutes and look what you’ve done. Do I need to punish her, Zara?”

  “No!” I try not to choke on my words.

  “Yes!” Sophia yells at the same time.

  Fuck, I hope I can get through this. By the grace of God, if I’m with Grant, I’d hope he’d still punishing me at this age. Again, that’s a vision I don’t need.

  “Sophia, behave. Poor Zara.”

  “She’s with Grant, don’t give me poor Zara.” She winks at me. “She’ll be getting her punishment for making him wait when all this is over.”

  Mitch leans down and kisses her hard, then turns and smiles at me. “In the car now, woman. We’re leaving.”

  Sophia hugs me and whispers in my ear. “Never be afraid to push his buttons. It’s worth it, trust me, sweetie. Never stop standing up to him. Best sex ever.”

  “Fuck,” I mumble as she pulls away, laughing. I know way too much information about this couple. Part of me tries to erase my memory. But the dirty side of me is cheering them on. Married life can be long. You need to keep your love alive. There’s no doubt they are doing that. Good on them.

  I need a minute to get my thoughts under control before I re-join the party. I thought I was confused and messed up before. Now my head’s spinning crazy thoughts. Time to leave. I need to get out of here. It’s getting late, but I need to dance to soothe my soul.

  Everyone starts to make their way out. Well, all the adults with responsibility. Xavier’s ready to start partying on with a bar crawl. He’s trying to convince Lilly and Alesha to join them. I definitely need to get out of here. I’m not hanging around to babysit his sorry ass all night. It’s no fun if you’re the only one sober.

  Standing on the sidewalk in the dark, I unlock the studio door. I hear Grant in my head. ‘Lock that fucking door, Zara. So, help me, I will punish you’. I miss that arrogant ass.

  Time to cry some more now I’m alone.

  Time to focus.

  Time to dance.

  Then, time to move forward.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Grant

  Sleep has never been an issue for me. Until Zara. Every time I put my head on the pillow, it’s like a movie, with sound.

  I see her.

  I hear her.

  I taste her.

  I smell her.

  I feel her.

  Every single night.

  My morning runs are getting earlier and earlier. They are also getting longer, and I know I’m just trying to run her out of my system. Fuck, this is getting harder every day.

  Last night, I thought I was going to lose it. She was so close, I just wanted to claim her. Stop all this bullshit. Pick her up, throw her over my shoulder, and walk out.

  That would piss her right off which would be even better. Her smart mouth has my body humming.

  Today is the last day before she flies to New York. Work is going to be a bastard. Branch Street is still one of the worst projects we ever took on. Everything seems to be happening to make life hard. Normally, I wouldn’t care too much but in this very moment, I’m ready to rip off the heads of all my supervisors and builders.

  If they could just do their jobs, then I wouldn’t have to be putting out fires every damn day. I don’t have time to be short-staffed with Zach away and I don’t want to let on to the others that I’m struggling, so instead, they just have to put up with my moods. I’m worse than my usual grumpy asshole self. Luke has no problem telling me I am on a regular basis.

  “Coffee,” I growl at my assistant as I stride into my office. She jumps and runs down the hall to the lunch room.

  I have no patience for anyone today. They need to know that up front.

  My emails are already exploding on the screen when I hear the faint knock on my door.

  “Yes,” I growl, expecting it to be my coffee.

  “Grant, sorry to bother you this morning.” Zoe enters tentatively and stands in front of my desk.

  “Sit, what is it?”

  “I’ll make it quick. I need to take some leave, please. I thought tomorrow would be the perfect time with Zach away. He won’t be back for another ten days and I can be here for his first day back. I will have my phone and laptop if there’s anything urgent.” She’s talking so fast, it takes me a while to comprehend.

  “Why?”

  “Pardon?”

  “Why do you need leave?”

  “That’s none of your business. I have plenty of annual leave accrued. I just need to get away for a few days. Don’t be a jerk.”

  “Sorry, Zoe. I’m just not myself today.”

  “No shit, just today?” she mumbles.

  “I suppose that will work, but if I need you, I’ll be in contact. Email everyone to let them know what’s going on. Wherever you’re going, enjoy.” I turn back to my emails, that lets her know she’s dismissed.

  “I intend to, don’t worry.” She walks out, and the door closes with a bang behind her. Women. Why can’t they close a fucking door instead of slamming it?

  To be honest, Zoe being away means one less person here to piss me off. She’s used to working with Zach and is spending way too much time with Luke. His bad habits are rubbing off on her.

  After my coffee, I settle in to make phone calls, schedule meetings and all that needs to be done to keep the Branch Street project moving forward. My secretary has booked up the afternoon full of on-site appointments, which I’m actually thankful for. Being busy today is a bonus.

  No time to think.

  No time to do something stupid.

  Briefcase, laptop, phone in hand, I’m heading to the elevators when Luke catches up to me.

  “What do you need, Luke? I’m on my way out for meetings all afternoon.”

  “Yeah, I know. I won’t keep you long. Just letting you know, I will be away for a few days. I have a buddy on the coast who needs help in his boatyard. It’s urgent, otherwise I wouldn’t leave, but he needs me.”

  Now my head is about to explode.

  “What the fuck, Luke? We’re short with Zach away. Branch Street is taking all my time and the other projects are falling behind. We fucking need you.”

  “I know, man, I am sorry. I just have to do this. Get the girls to help. They are capable, you know. I won’t be gone for too long and Zach already said he would come in if you need him.”

  “Fuck, Luke. Fuck you. Why did you contact Zach? Leave him to be with his family. Just fucking go! Don’t worry, I will carry your sorry ass, too. It’s not like I have a life, anyway. I’m late, I need to go.”

  I push the door-close button on the elevator
. As it starts to move, I punch the wall.

  For fuck’s sake!

  Am I the only one who cares about this company enough to keep it running and make money, so we can all live? I’ve given up most of my life to this business and family, and this is how they repay me? I thought they were supposed to help when it’s needed. They should know I fucking need them.

  I’m losing it and I don’t know how to stop.

  Meeting after meeting, I walk in and simply go through the motions. If there’s one thing I have learned over the years, it’s to turn off my personal life as I walk into a meeting room.

  Deals are done, problems are solved, and finally, I’m riding the elevator up to my apartment.

  Dropping my briefcase, laptop, and papers on my table, I take a minute and try to breathe.

  My head tells me one thing, but my heart tells me another. They’re at war and I don’t have the energy to be the referee.

  Fuck. I can’t do this.

  Zara

  Today has been so long. Being exhausted isn’t what I need.

  I taught my Tiny Dancers class this morning. They did manage to make me smile which hasn’t happened much over the last couple of weeks. This is the reason I still teach. The joy on their faces and their love of dancing makes it all worthwhile. They don’t want anything from me. They just want to dance. Simple.

  Then I had a visit from a woman who said her daughter was best friends with little Sophia. She was desperate to get her daughter into the same class. I had never heard Soph mention the girl’s name before. But, the woman insisted she knew Sophia’s uncle who’d recommended my dance school. Apparently, she was told to enroll here so they could see each other more often.

  She better be talking about Luke or I will scratch out her eyes. The way I feel today, I’m not even joking.

  I don’t have time to sort it out before tomorrow, so she will just have to wait. That is, if I want her at the studio. She was pushy and already started to throw her weight around. A high-maintenance dance mom, would be my guess. I already have enough of those who think they know more than me. That’s next week’s problem.

  Luckily, I’d packed my bag days ago including my interview dress, audition outfit and a few clothes to get me through. I don’t plan on going anywhere while I am there, so I just need clothes to travel and spend the night.

  More than anything, I just need sleep. That and to be able to relax.

  My dancing is so much better when I relax. The body is fluid and able to move with the music. Stress gives you jerky, rigid movements, which is not good. You need to be one with the music.

  This will be my last rehearsal before the audition. It’s time to nail this.

  My heart has been racing all day. Standing in the center of the studio facing the mirrors, I wonder how I got here. Stop thinking, Zara! Just dance.

  The more I move, the more rigid I feel. I can’t relax enough to really let go. Time after time, I stop the music and start again, only to become more frustrated.

  So much tension. My body aches. I can’t do this tomorrow. I’ll fail before I even begin.

  “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck you. Fuck you, Grant! I pushed the man I love away, all to live this dream and now I won’t even reach it.

  “You, idiot. You’ve lost them both.”

  The tears run as I start to slide to the floor and curl into the fetal position.

  The hairs on body start to tingle. I know before he’s even touched me that Grant is here.

  My body knows.

  My heart knows, but most of all my soul feels him touching it from afar.

  Strong arms pick me up, cradle, and stroke.

  His touch, his smell.

  This is home. This is my place of calm.

  “Baby, I’m here. Shh. It will be okay. I’m here.”

  “Grant.”

  “Yeah, baby. I’m here. I told you, if you needed me I will always come. No matter what.”

  My body trembles in his arms.

  “But I didn’t call you, how did you know?”

  “Because you are my girl. I will always know.”

  “I can’t sleep…I can’t relax…I can’t dance…I can’t function… and I can’t breathe without you.”

  “I know, baby. Let me help. Let me make it better. Just for one night. Let me take you home. You need me to get you through this.”

  His pause makes me shiver.

  “Zara, I fucking need you too.”

  “Just one night? No regrets?”

  “No, baby, no regrets.”

  “I just need to sleep in your arms. You calm me. You calm my soul.”

  “Trust me, Zara, I will take care of you. You are mine. I will never let you down. I will always be here when you need me.”

  He stalks towards my bag and keys. I grab them with my free hand, the other wrapped into his shirt, hanging on and not letting you.

  Grant lets me go only when we reach the car and he tucks me safely into the passenger seat. I know this is only going to make this harder in the long run, but I don’t care anymore. I need this. I need him.

  The car ride is silent, the air electric and full of anticipation, and confusion. What am I doing? Tomorrow is the biggest day of my life and here I am, with the man who has me twisted in knots. It’s like I’m living a dream.

  I’ve spent every night trying to get him out of my head so I can focus. Now, the night before my audition, I’m hanging on to him like my world won’t exist without him. Part of me doesn’t exist without him. That part is getting bigger and bigger every day we are apart.

  I don’t even notice we’ve parked in an unfamiliar garage of a building which must be Grant’s.

  “Why are we here? I thought you were taking me home.”

  “I did. Let me take care of you tonight. Come on. Let’s get you upstairs so I can feed you and run you a relaxing bath. Just stop thinking, baby. It’s making it worse. Just go with it. It will be okay, I promise.” He stands next me at the car door, hand outstretched. I have to make a decision.

  I should ask him to take me home to my flat. I am in control of what will happen. I am not even sure what we are doing here.

  If I get out of the car, there’s no going back. If I take his hand, then he takes control. Grant takes me to his apartment and I stop having to think. He wants to make me happy and look after me. I certainly don’t deserve anything from him, but I want it all. I’m such a selfish bitch.

  “I’m scared, Grant. I shouldn’t be here. I can’t do this to you.”

  Taking my hand, he pulls me into his arms. “Tonight, you don’t get to make the decisions, Zara. You don’t get to think. Just take everything that’s given. Tomorrow you will thank me. Now, move your feet.” His voice is low and controlling, but not forceful. Although he’s taking control, he’s still giving me that small window to back out.

  Fuck it. I need to let go. I just can’t do this anymore.

  “Okay,” I whisper. “I can’t make you any promises past tomorrow.”

  “Nothing has changed. No pressure.”

  The lift doors slide closed. I feel my chest tightening and my hand tingles from his tight grasp. Both of us are breathing heavy, the anticipation real.

  His thumb strokes my hand. “Grant,” I murmur, looking into his eyes.

  That’s the final straw. He snaps.

  His hard body pins me against the wall of the mirrors. Our mouths slam together and are devouring each other. I can’t stop. I want every part of him. No barriers. Raw and exposed.

  My feet leave the floor as he grabs my ass and wraps my legs around him. I feel his cock, hard as a rock, pushing into my center with every kiss, feeling him right where I need him. He has me struggling to hold in my moans of pleasure. The lift slows but I don’t want him to stop. I want this and more. I want every part of Grant, not just his body. Tonight, I want his heart and soul. He already has mine.

  “Don’t fucking stop,” he growls as he carries me into his apartment. I feel my ass hit
the bench as he lays me out.

  “The most beautiful feast I’ve ever spread out in my kitchen. One I intend to devour, over and over again.” Running his hands up the inside of my legs, he finds my pussy already wet for him has soaked through my pants. “Last chance, baby. I plan on feasting on you and then fucking you until you can’t keep your eyes open one second longer. If you can’t do this, tell me. I can’t have you here, in my home without fucking you.”

  “I can’t… I can’t walk away from you. You know that. I need this, Grant. I need you. All of you. Don’t stop. Please, don’t stop. Take it all away, the hurt, the noise, the heartache. Fuck it away, please.”

  “I’ve told you before, you will never have to beg. Lay back, baby. Close your eyes and breathe.”

  There’s one thing I know for certain. He won’t be gentle, and I can’t wait.

  My pants are ripped and fall to the floor. Grant’s big, strong hands pry my legs apart. My feet are on the bench, knees bent. I’m splayed open for him. With my eyes closed, it makes it so much more sensual. I can’t see where he is, but I can feel him.

  His hands grip my thighs as he slides me to the edge of the bench, my ass just balancing on the edge. His breath blows on my pussy.

  I moan.

  He growls.

  “Fuuuck!” is all I hear moments before his tongue is on me. He licks with force through my folds and makes me writhe against his face. I’m so strung out it feels like I’m hanging on by a thread. He knows it isn’t going to take much for my orgasm to shatter me.

  “Don’t hold back. I want every drop of you, all over my face, right now. Every fucking drop, baby.”

  Oh. My. God

  My shirt feels too restrictive. Struggling, I pull it and my sports bra over my head. I’m not dressed in anything sexy, but I’m positive he hasn’t even noticed.

  His tongue drags my juices up all over my clit, sucking it into his mouth like he’s never been fed. My head thrashes back and forth with the intense feelings that build through my body.