“Colin, I cannot allow any sense of debt you feel to push you into coming with me,” she protested. “And in the matter of who is in debt to whom, you are the one who saved my life by bringing me—”
“Tess, please, let it go.” He cupped her chin and looked closely into her beautiful dark eyes. “Let me put it this way, I cannot let you leave Benmore without me. I want to come. I have to come.”
They gazed into each other’s eyes for a long moment, and then Tess simply nodded.
He was grateful that she didn’t press him further about his motives for coming. How could he explain something that he couldn’t understand himself? Colin walked to the stables to check on the horses that were being readied. He’d had a lengthy talk about Ravenie Castle and the Lindsays with his father last night. He wanted to be ready for what they were going to face—whatever it was. He wanted to be ready for the Lindsay clan’s reaction to Tess’s appearance.
All Lord Alec had been able to tell Colin about Ravenie itself was that the place had never been repaired after the fire. Evelyn, claiming that there was no proof yet that Tess, the only heir, was truly dead, had left a steward there to oversee the holding and collect the rents in her daughter’s name. As far as Colin’s father had known, there had been no fighting by the Lindsay clan, no appeals to the king. From a distance it appeared that the people’s heart had died with their chieftain.
“We shall never get there moving at the pace you’re setting this morning.”
Colin turned to the shadow of his brother approaching from the house. “What do you mean we?”
“I mean we as in I’m riding along.” James stretched and gave a great yawn. “I’ve been down that way a few times of late, and I know the lay of the land. Why, there’s a fine tavern just south of there on the Inverness road with the prettiest lasses this side of…”
“We’re going directly to Ravenie Castle and back.”
“I know that, you fool.” James grinned and clapped his brother on the shoulder. “Our parents decided last night that it might be advantageous for Tess to make her first appearance among her people with several of the Macpherson brothers standing at her shoulder. They wanted Alexander to go, as well. But you know how attached the old goat is to his sleep. I, for one, was not about to have my throat cut by the beast for waking him up at this hour.”
Colin certainly saw logic in his parent’s thinking. No one knew what to expect when they arrived at Ravenie. And it would certainly help to have the Lindsays see another Highland clan as powerful as the Macphersons backing Tess.
“And don’t worry. You have no need to lecture or threaten me about keeping my distance from Tess.” James led his own horse from its stall.
“Is that so?”
The older brother smiled. “Actually, I’ve taken a liking to having Tess around. I was telling Alexander last night that, since her arrival, you’ve managed to somehow grow up. You are not quite so annoying to have around.”
“You mean I haven’t bothered you two since coming home about chasing every skirt from Elgin to Edinburgh.”
“Aye, and that’s a definite improvement.” James pointed a finger at Colin’s chest. “Keep it up, lad, and we might actually let you live.”
CHAPTER 12
The sun was almost directly overhead. Riding side by side at the head of the group of warriors, they crossed over a green ridge and started down into the valley that Tess was told marked the beginning of Lindsay lands. Her anxiousness sat like a rock in the pit of her stomach. She glanced at Colin riding comfortably beside her. He had such confidence. She turned in her saddle and saw James riding and talking amiably to one of the older Macpherson warriors, halfway down the line of men. Everyone seemed so self-assured—everyone but her.
She turned to Colin. “Do you think the Lindsays already know that I am alive?”
“The way I understand it, they never gave up hope.”
The closer they came to Ravenie, the more nervous she was becoming. “But do you think that they’ve heard that I am in the Highlands?”
“Despite the ruggedness of the land, news travels fast here. I would guess that as soon as we anchored and came ashore, someone was heading this way with every last bit of information they could collect about you.”
They rode in silence for a few minutes.
“I don’t know any of them,” she finally whispered worriedly. “I cannot recall any names or faces.
“That worries you?” he asked.
“Aye. It troubles me greatly.”
Colin nudged his horse closer to her side. His boot brushed against her leg, and his warm hand reached over and took her freezing one. “You are returning to them, Tess. This is more than anyone has done for them in eleven years.”
Tess wished she could consider this a consolation, but she didn’t. As short a time as she had been at Benmore Castle, she had seen in Lord Alec and Lady Fiona what a leader should be to their people. She did not remember her father to be able to guess what kind of laird he had been—or how well he had been respected by his clan.
Her mother, however, had left and never gone back to Ravenie. How could anyone care for their people by staying away for so many years?
The track they were following crossed another path ahead, and the two reined their horses to a halt. Colin let go of her hand and turned to James as he approached.
“Turning to the right here will take us directly to Ravenie Castle,” the older brother told Tess. “The path bends around that forest grove and climbs to higher ground behind it. The path we’re on goes straight over that brae through the farms and to the old village and tower where the clan chief originally lived…before the king gave permission for Ravenie Castle to be built. So if you’d like to go to the Castle…”
“I wish to go straight.”
“We shall go wherever you wish to go.” Colin replied with a nod, motioning the group to that direction.
She had lived a nearly solitary life for so many years on the Isle of May. Now she realized that place had very little significance. It was people that mattered.
The trail they took wound up a rocky brae toward an azure sky. With each passing moment, Tess’s anticipation grew. At the crest of the hill, she brought her horse to an abrupt stop as she stared at the squalor that lay before her in the valley.
There were old huts made of stone and timber and sod in various stages of disrepair beside a grove of tall trees. Even from here, she could tell from collapsed thatched roofs that many were deserted. Though some fields had been planted, more lay fallow. She urged her horse down the slope behind Colin’s steed. The land looked to be good for grazing, though there were few sheep and even fewer of the red, shaggy cattle she seen so many of around Benmore Castle. A wide stream snaked through the countryside.
In a few moments, they’d drawn near the first of cottages nestled into the side of the brae.
“Where do you think these people have gone?” Tess asked, eyeing the burned hut. A flap of stiff, blackened leather hung by a single strand in the doorway of the abandoned cottage.
“Crofters won’t stay where they are unprotected.” Colin waited as she rode closer to the buildings. “These folks might have moved down into the village.”
Protection. These people had no protection. Tess felt the knot tighten in her stomach. She followed Colin as he continued on down the path. James pushed ahead of the others to ride beside them.
“Beyond that glen just ahead, the village lies. Would you like me to send a couple of men before us?” he asked Tess. “I shall go myself to tell the village folk that you are coming.”
She shook her head adamantly. “I don’t want a prepared welcome.”
“I shouldn’t worry much about that.” Colin said. “But without giving them any warning, there is no telling how they’ll…”
“Please don’t,” she interrupted gently. “I appreciate your offer, though. But I cannot ask for their acceptance. I have to earn it.”
Tess pushed pa
st the two brothers and slowly continued toward the village. She had thought the greatest test of her courage would be facing her mother. But this was much harder.
She took one last look at the abandoned farm. Suddenly, there seemed to be so much more at stake.
A moment later, she heard the hooves of the Macpherson horses behind her. She turned in her saddle and found Colin and James riding right behind her. Tess took strength from Colin’s reassuring nod.
At the crest of a hill beyond the glen, she reined her mare again to a halt. At the bottom of a long gentle slope, beside a broad creek, lay a partially ruined tower house. Stretching out from what had once been a stone curtain wall, a cluster of fifty or so cottages formed a village on both sides of the water. On this side of the brook, at some distance from the outer line of huts, an orchard of fruit trees ran in neat rows up the hillside, and a small herd of the shaggy, red cattle grazed in open pastureland. On the other side of the valley, she could see good-sized flocks of sheep and newborn lambs.
“That is Ravenie to your right.”
At James’s announcement, Tess looked past the village. There, Ravenie Castle loomed proudly on the high ground overlooking the countryside. From this distance, she could see no sign of the fire, no indication that there ever was any damage.
Tess looked back at the fields and at the briskly running stream and, finally, at the village. “You say the Lindsay chieftain once lived at the tower house?”
“Aye. They call it the Tower. The castle itself is only as old as your father would have been. I believe your grandfather built it.”
The happy shrieks of children drew Tess’s gaze back to the huts, and the edges of her mouth turned up in a smile as she watched a dozen, small, barefooted urchins running in playful pursuit of a dog. She wondered if in her own childhood, she had been allowed to come and play in the village.
Tess’s attention turned to the groups of men and women who seemed to have stopped the planting they were doing. They were all staring up the hill in their direction.
“They won’t be afraid of Macpherson men, will they?” she asked James, suddenly concerned.
“Macphersons have never raided these lands before. And in times of hardship, many Lindsay crofters have traveled west and taken shelter among our people. There is no reason for them to be fearful now.”
But some of the Lindsays seemed definitely agitated, Tess thought. She watched as a number of them started quickly down toward the village.
She led her horse through the groves of fruit trees that lined the steep hillside. The rest of the group followed behind her. Breaking out of the trees into one of the upper pastures, Tess reined in her mount and called a greeting to half a dozen workers who were watching the riders approach.
None raised a hand in welcome. None called a greeting. And the Macphersons were not the object of these people’s hard stares. Tess was.
She swallowed the painful knot of disappointment that was threatening to choke her and rode slowly past the silent throng.
“Perhaps we should go to the castle first,” James suggested.
“She has to face this. ‘Tis best that she do it now,” Colin said in answer to his brother. But Tess could have spoke them, as well. She was glad that he understood.
As they approached the village, she could see more people coming down from the fields to the edge of the path. Regardless of whether they were man or women or a child, their expressions were the same…and they were far from friendly. An arrowshot from the edge of the stream, as dozens of onlookers watched, Tess climbed down from her horse.
Colin and James reined their steeds in beside her. She handed the reins to James. The rest of the Macphersons were lined up behind their leaders.
“I would like to walk from here alone.”
Colin instantly opened his mouth to object, but then closed it without a word.
“I just ask for a little time,” she said softly, reaching up and taking his hand. “This is all part of what I have to face…alone.”
He nodded, but his fingers held on to hers for an extended moment before he finally let her go.
Tess turned to face her destiny.
Straight ahead, she could see that the narrow road that led to the ruined tower house was crowded with people. Tess took a deep breath and stepped toward the eerily silent assembly.
The same children that had been running happily before now moved to stand beside their elders. Tess looked down at the bare feet and dirty faces, at the rags that they wore as clothes. This close, she saw other things, as well. The look of hunger was pronounced in some faces. There was illness in others. There was also curiosity and caution and even despair.
She looked hard at the poor condition of the cottages…and she knew. What she saw here was so different from what she’d seen at Benmore Castle. These people had clearly been ignored and neglected by those who had promised to protect them. For too long the people themselves had been abandoned.
As Tess approached the first line of cottages, a scrawny dog of black and tan approached, hackles up and growling in obvious nervousness. Without retreating a step, Tess held out her hand, palm flat, welcoming the animal and his scrutiny. After a moment of sniffing, the dog wagged his tail and retired to his owner with the air of a victorious warrior.
With her head held high and her back straight, Tess walked farther down the road. With every step, she met people’s gazes, and they made way for her. Almost to the tower house, she came upon a market cross. She stopped and turned around as the crowd closed in behind her. She turned completely around and looked into the circle of faces.
“I am Tess,” she said gently and yet loudly enough for everyone to hear. “Most of you do not know me. Or if you do, you may only remember me as a child.” She took a deep breath and tried to will away the doubts that were chilling her bones.
“I left here…” She shook her head. “I left there.” She pointed to the castle on the ridge. “I left there eleven years ago…the same night that my father was killed.”
Tess cleared her throat and struggled to organize her thoughts and her words. But everything had become a jumble of emotion within her.
“I don’t know if ’twas the tragedy that I witnessed here or what happened during a terrible sea storm after, but when I washed ashore on the Isle of May, I had no memory of who I was or where I had come from.” She looked into somber faces. “I was found by an old couple that were the keepers of St. Adrian’s shrine. They were the folk I stayed with for all these years.”
An old man leaning on a crutch nodded instantly at the mention of the shrine.
“While there, I thought ’twas my fate to remain forever on that island, taking care of a handful of sheep and a weary pilgrim or two every summer. I thought that was the life I was destined to live. And I would have done exactly that if it had not been that the youngest son of the Macpherson laird had one day washed ashore, as well.” Tess glanced in the direction of Colin. He was sitting on his horse, eyeing the crowd warily. James and the other Macpherson men sat behind him
“’Twas he who identified the Lindsay brooch I had. ’Twas he who made me realize my nightmares of fire and horror were really a part of my past.” Tess looked at Colin again, and her voice softened. “And ’twas he who told me that all of you were still here.”
She looked at the faces again, held their gazes, sought their response. “I was made to realize that I was not alone, as I thought. That perhaps if I were to seek the people of the Lindsay clan, that if I were to explain to you that I was no different than you, that I too had been displaced and abandoned for the past eleven years…then perhaps you would take me back. Perhaps I would be given the opportunity of finally knowing my own people.”
Silence once again threw its heavy wing over the crowd. Tess managed to hold back the tears despite the desperation that twisted her insides. The group continued to stare.
Then, a shuffling sound came from her left. She turned and saw an older man pushing throu
gh.
“My name’s Robbie. I was the cook up at the castle when ye were a wee lass. I remember ye clutching at the skirts o’ yer nursemaid, Elsie, and following her everywhere about the place.” The man leaned his weight heavily on a stick that he was using for walking.
The memory was vague, like a scene she had perhaps imagined, but Tess voiced it. “I remember falling over a bucket of water and oats and nearly putting out the kitchen fire.”
“Ye didn’t fall, lassie. Ye jumped.”
A rumble of laughter rolled across the crowd.
“Ye were always sure to be into a bit of mischief when ye were a wee thing.” A middle-aged woman announced with a smile from the opposite side of the gathering. “I was one of the serving lasses that would come up daily from the village. I remember the day ye were trying to climb down the wall of the castle from yer room. Ye were caught on a ledge halfway down and didn’t know to go up or down…and at the same time ye were refusing to cry for help.”
Tess had never been afraid of climbing the cliffs on the May, and now she knew that her adventurous spirit had its origins here. “I wish I could remember your name.”
“Lil.” The woman smiled affably. “I fetched one of the grooms. ‘Twas Rory. The two of us helped you down.”
“I was the one she fetched.” A man standing next to her said. “Ye were worried about some birds that were nesting on the ledge outside your window, lassie. D’ye remember?”
Tess took a step closer to the couple. She looked closely into the man’s face. There was a flicker of recollection. “Horses. Somehow I see you where there are horses.”
“Aye, mistress. ’Twas I that taught you to ride.”
Someone else called out another story from the crowd. Another spoke out. Tess started to remember a sound, a name, a face. More than ever before, something sweetly familiar wrapped a blanket of warmth around her. The coldness that she had sensed before among these people dissipated like a morning mist.
She felt a tug at her skirt and looked down into the dirty face of a little girl beaming up at her. Tess opened her hand, and the child took it, nestling against her legs.
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