Until Harry

by L. A. Casey

  “Fine,” I bit out, and shoved my duvet covers from my body.

  Lavender made a show of covering her eyes. “I’m your best friend and room-mate, but I don’t need to see that bloody much of you.”

  I looked down and saw that my bedtime crop top revealed one of my boobs, and my underwear had given me a wedgie. I adjusted my top and underwear, then laughed as I got to my feet. I got clean underwear from my chest of drawers, a pair of comfortable trousers and a plain bra and black tank top. I went into the bathroom and had a quick cloth wash before putting the fresh clothes on.

  I washed my face clear of last night’s make-up, tied my hair up in a loose bun on top of my head and put my glasses on. I walked downstairs, letting Lavender lead the way.

  “Did you wake her, Lavender?” Layton’s voice called out as she walked into the kitchen.

  “Barely,” Lavender snorted. “I think she’s still drunk.”

  “Great,” Lochlan grumbled, making me grin.

  I walked into the kitchen and cleared my throat.

  “There she is,” Kale announced, beaming as he stood up from his chair.

  I groaned and placed a hand on my head.

  “Not so loud,” I moaned.

  He grinned as he approached me.

  “Sorry,” he whispered before folding his arms around me, pulling me tightly against his warm body.

  I missed hugging him, and I hated that.

  “’S’okay,” I murmured.

  Kale released me and returned to his seat while my mother gave me her usual morning hug and kiss on the cheek. She did this often when I was younger, but now that I was away at college, she made sure to do it every time I was home and came down for breakfast.

  “I heard you getting sick this morning,” she said, frowning. “How much did you drink last night?”

  Uh.

  “Yeah, little sister,” Lochlan asked, “how much did you drink last night?”

  I looked over at his grinning face and glared before I turned back to our mother.

  “Not much. I just did too much dancing, I guess, and it made me sick.”

  Lavender snorted, and my palm itched to smack her.

  “What time did you get in?” my mother asked as I moved to the kitchen table and sat on the only seat available, between Lavender and Kale. “I didn’t look at the clock when I heard you in the bathroom.”

  I blinked when I drew a blank at her question, then looked to Lavender, who laughed.

  “I dropped her out of the taxi at half seven,” she said, shaking her head.

  That late? I cringed.

  No wonder I had such a headache. I was nursing a hangover as well as running on next-to-zero sleep.

  “Your brothers never came in that late,” my mother commented.

  I rolled my eyes. “My brothers were never as cool as me.”

  Said brothers snorted.

  I grimaced as my mother set a plate of food in front of me. I touched my stomach and decided to wait a few minutes before I tried to eat anything; I didn’t trust that I wouldn’t get sick again.

  “What did you do last night?” Kale asked, happily eating the breakfast that my mother made.

  “Who did she do last night is more like it,” Lavender mumbled as she reached for her orange juice.

  It was loud enough for Kale and my bloody brothers to hear. Naturally, all three of their heads snapped in my direction, a scowl perfectly in place on all of their faces, which caused me to laugh.

  “She’s joking,” I said, and kicked Lavender under the table.

  Three pairs of eyes landed on Lavender, who winced in pain from my kick but forced an innocent, and convincing, smile. “Of course I’m joking.”

  My brothers stared at her for a few more seconds before they were appeased enough to go back to eating their breakfast. I blew out a relieved breath, then looked to Lavender and glared at her.

  “Sorry,” she mouthed, but she had a grin on her face.

  The evil twit.

  I looked away from her and flinched when I looked at Kale and found his eyes on me. He’d watched my interaction with Lavender, and I could see that he thought her smile and defence were pure bullshit. He looked a little mad, but he had no right to be. He wasn’t my boyfriend, and over the past two years, he’d barely been my friend, so he shouldn’t care who I had sex with.

  I hardly ever saw him anymore, and we only texted and spoke over the phone every so often. I knew that was to be expected with him living in London, but deep down I knew that we had drifted apart because we’d had sex, and he was still either ashamed or embarrassed about that, or probably both.

  “Whatever,” I mumbled and looked down to my untouched plate of food.

  I pushed it away, sighing.

  “Not hungry?” Lavender asked as she dug into the food before her.

  I shook my head. “My stomach is still unsettled.”

  “I told you not to shoot sambuca,” she said, clucking her tongue.

  I growled. “I’m aware you told me not to, thanks.”

  Lavender smirked, clearly enjoying her sick form of torturing me.

  “I’m just glad you didn’t shoot Jack Daniel’s when it was offered to you,” she mused. “I’d probably have to carry you home every time we go out, otherwise.”

  I swallowed. “I’ll never drink Jack Daniel’s.”

  “Why not?” Layton asked. “It’s not that bad. It’s Kale’s favourite drink.”

  “Exactly,” I mumbled.

  The smell and taste of Jack Daniel’s reminded me all too much of my night with Kale, and Kale in general, so I steered well clear of it.

  I was glad when Lavender’s phone rang, putting the focus on her. She fumbled with the phone as she pulled it from her pocket.

  “I’m sorry – I thought it was on silent. Uh, Lane, you’re calling me?”

  My eyebrows rose in surprise. “I’m not. My phone is in my bag upstairs.”

  Lavender turned her phone to face me, and I saw my name flashing across the screen. Without thinking, I took Lavender’s phone, answered it and put it to my ear.

  “Hello?” I asked.

  “Lavender?” a male voice asked.

  “No,” I said. “This is Lane. Who are you, and how did you get my phone?”

  The voice chuckled. “You left it in my apartment last night.”

  I drew a blank.

  “Your apartment?” I questioned. “I wasn’t in any apartment last night—”

  “Yes,” Lavender whispered. “You were.”

  I frowned at her. “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah,” she murmured. “Me, you, Daven and the hot lad you pulled went back to his place after the club closed for more drinks.”

  I thought back to last night and began to remember what Lavender was talking about.

  “Shit,” I mumbled, and moved the phone away from my mouth. “What was his name again?”

  Lavender glanced in Kale’s direction and said, “Jensen.”

  I could practically feel the glares of the males around the table, and I sensed the disappointment radiate from my mother in waves. I ignored them all and focused on my conversation with the lad on the phone.

  “Can I have my phone back, Jensen?” I asked, politely.

  He chuckled, again. “Of course, I was calling Lavender from your phone, because I didn’t have her number, so I could return it to you.”

  That was . . . nice of him.

  “What’s your address and I’ll—”

  “Just text your info to Lavender’s phone, and I’ll get it later.”

  When I feel human again.

  “Okay, babe,” Jensen chirped.

  I cringed. “Okay, bye.”

  “Bye.”

  I hung up and handed Lavender back her phone. She was looking at everyone in the room, and then looked at me like she thought they would kill me, which made me laugh.

  “You think this is funny?” Lochlan growled. “You were with a lad last night, drunk off
your head, you don’t remember it and now you’re laughing?”

  I closed my mouth and just shrugged because I didn’t know what else to do.

  “Those are the actions of a dirty tramp,” he scowled. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

  “Mate,” Kale glared. “Don’t fucking talk to her like that!”

  I shared a surprised look with Lavender because Kale looked like he was ready to jump my brother for saying what he did to me, but my attention was forced away when Layton bellowed, “Lochlan!”

  Lochlan looked at our brother. “You condone this shit?”

  “No,” Layton growled, “but I’m not about to call her out in front of company. Don’t be an arsehole, and keep your comments to yourself. She isn’t a damn kid anymore.”

  Regret washed over Lochlan’s features when Layton, as usual, got through to him. He was too stubborn to apologise to me, though, and while I appreciated my brother’s support, I was still humiliated. I excused myself from the table and hurried up to my room. I tried to close the door behind me, but Lavender was quick to follow and stopped me from doing so.

  “I’m okay,” I whispered.

  She didn’t say a word, only hugged me as my tears fell.

  “He didn’t mean it,” she said, and squeezed me tightly. “That was just not something a brother would ever want to know. He was angry, that’s all.”

  I nodded. I didn’t blame Lochlan for saying horrible things about me. I thought them about myself too.

  “It’s not like he’s lying, though,” I murmured.

  Lavender pulled back and scowled at me. “You aren’t dirty, and you aren’t a bloody tramp. Do you understand me?”

  “But—”

  “No ‘buts’,” she said, cutting me off, her tone harsh. “No one is perfect. You’ve made some mistakes, but that doesn’t make you a bad person.”

  I swallowed. “Thanks, Lav.”

  “I’m serious,” she pressed. “Hear me clearly.”

  I sighed. “I do, but the mistakes you mentioned, I don’t want to make them anymore.”

  “Then we’ll cut off the source to those mistakes,” she said with a firm nod.

  I raised my brows. “And what is the source?”

  “Alcohol,” she said.

  I blinked. “Yeah, nothing good has ever come from me drinking.”

  “You use it to drown your sorrows, but we’ll find a new way for you to do that.” Lavender kissed my cheek and gave me another hug. “We’ll figure this out together. I’m right here with you; I’ll help you up if you fall.”

  “I love you, Lav,” I said, and held her tightly.

  Lavender gave me a squeeze in return. “I love you too, even if you are a pain in my arse.”

  I laughed, and just like that, she eased the tension out of the room. She was right: I’d eventually find a new way to deal with getting over Kale, and this time it wouldn’t be something to just help the pain for a few hours.

  “Do you want me to come with you?” Lavender asked as she dropped me outside of the apartment complex that I vaguely remembered being in last night.

  I shook my head. “I’m just getting my phone and then going home. I’m not sticking around to chat. I’m too hung over for speaking at any volume.”

  Lavender snorted. “Okay, I’ll call you after I get off work.”

  We both worked part-time at my nanny’s café to help us avoid dipping into our student loans until absolutely necessary. We already owed our lives to debt, and we didn’t need our casual spending to be a problem for us, so we got jobs to give us some extra cash.

  “Love you,” she shouted.

  I winced at the volume of her shout and mumbled, “I love you too.”

  I closed the door to Lavender’s car and waved as she drove off. When she was out of sight, I turned to face the apartment complex, and without a second thought, I walked up the steps and searched the names next to the apartment numbers. When I spotted Jensen’s, I pressed the button next to his name. A few seconds passed before a tired voice spoke through the intercom.

  “Hello?” the voice grumbled.

  I cleared my throat. “Hi, it’s, uh, Lane Edwards. I’m here to pick up my phone from Jensen.”

  “Yeah, I’m Jensen – come on up.” The voice had suddenly perked up. “I’m on the third floor in apartment three-zero-three.”

  I had a bad feeling as soon as the door to the apartment building opened, but I shook it off and walked inside. I had to get my phone, and that meant I had to go inside to do that.

  Suck it up, I told myself.

  I took the stairs to the third floor instead of taking the elevator; it was really small and made a weird noise when the doors opened. I envisioned getting stuck in it, and that thought alone had me walking up the stairs of the building not five seconds later.

  When I reached the third floor and found apartment three-zero-three, I knocked on the door and waited. The door opened pretty fast, and the lad to open it smiled at me like he was very happy to see me. I inwardly cringed because I knew why.

  I had flashes of my body rolling around with his during the early hours of the morning, and it made me feel sick with myself.

  “Hey,” I said, forcing a smile. “Can I get my phone from you real quick? I’m late for work.”

  I wasn’t on shift today, but Jensen didn’t need to know that.

  He nodded and gestured me into the apartment.

  “Yeah, of course,” he smiled. “Come on in. I’ll go get it for you.”

  I hesitated for a second or two, but against my better judgement, I stepped into Jensen’s apartment and allowed him to close his apartment door behind me.

  “Do you want a cup of tea?” he asked as he walked down a hallway that I knew led to his bedroom.

  I shuddered. “No, thank you.”

  I just want my phone so I can leave.

  “Here we are,” Jensen announced a minute or two later.

  I looked in his direction and exhaled a relieved breath when I saw he did in fact have my phone in his hand. I reached for it when he neared me, but I frowned when he held it up in the air, out of my reach.

  “I have to get to work, Jensen – give me my phone,” I said flatly.

  “Can you not give work a miss?” he asked, sounding hopeful.

  Was he joking?

  I snorted. “No, I can’t, sorry.”

  His brows furrowed. “But you had fun last night.”

  I was sure I did, but it didn’t mean I was sticking around for round two.

  I felt my cheeks flush. “I can only remember bits of last night. I was pretty wasted.”

  He stepped towards me, a grin playing on his lips. “I’ll happily remind you of what you can’t remember.”

  Alarm bells began to sound in my head.

  “No, thank you,” I said, and looked towards the front door.

  Jensen laughed at me like we were playing a game of cat and mouse, and I’d definitely got stuck with being the mouse.

  “Come on,” he teased. “I want to hear you cry out when I make you come again.”

  I swallowed bile, not liking hearing someone I barely knew talk about me in such a way.

  “I’m leaving,” I said firmly.

  He moved fast, and before I could get to the door, he blocked it with his body.

  “Jensen,” I said in a warning tone, even though fear was seeping into my pores. “I would like to leave, please.”

  He raised an eyebrow and said, “Why are you being so shy? You weren’t last night when my cock was in your mouth.” He winked then. “Best head I’ve ever gotten, by the way.”

  My stomach lurched as I tried to push by him.

  “Keep the fucking phone,” I spat. “I’m leaving.”

  I ran for the front door, but Jensen roughly pushed me back by the shoulders. I fell backwards and landed on the floor with a loud thud. I yelped in pain, but fear drove my body to instantly put itself back up into a standing position. Jensen was on me before I
got fully upright, though, and he brought me back down to the floor like a pile of tumbling bricks.

  “Get off me!” I bellowed, and swung my hand, connecting my fist with his face.

  Jensen’s face jerked to the right, and it caused him to curse out loud.

  “Fucking bitch!” he shouted, and fisted his hand in my hair, forcing my mouth to his. “Just give me one kiss,” he growled, and pressed his lips to mine. “Just like last night.”

  I reacted with my teeth and bit him, causing him to tear his mouth from me and roar, “You fucking cunt!”

  I saw the movement of his hand too late but felt the moment it connected with my face. I cried out, and white dots spotted my vision as pain erupted. I lifted my hands to protect my face because biting Jensen sent him into a frenzy of throwing punch after punch at me.

  I tried to defend myself, but he landed every hit he threw.

  The tang of metal attacked my taste buds, and blood filled my mouth.

  I tried to scream, but all that sounded was a disgusting gurgle as blood gushed from my nose and ran down my throat. I noticed then that Jensen had stopped hitting me, but it was only because I heard him telling me to do something.

  “Open your legs or I’ll cut you,” he growled.

  Cut me?

  I felt light-headed, and his voice sounded like it was coming from all directions. I looked up at him, and I could see him as plain as day, hovering over me, his breathing rapid as the sweat beaded his forehead. It confused me, because my face, arms and chest were throbbing like he was still hitting me.

  The pain was immense.

  “Please,” I spluttered. “Please . . . don’t.”

  He shook his head. “It’s too fucking late for that now. All you had to do was kiss me! You made me hit you, you made me!”

  I watched as he began to unbutton his jeans, and I saw he had an erection. It scared me enough to scream bloody murder.

  “Help me!” I screamed as loud as I could and fought against Jensen when he tried to cover my mouth with his hands.

  I heard a female voice shout outside of the apartment, and hope filled me.

  “Help me!” I cried out once more. “Help!”

  “Shut the fuck up!” Jensen bellowed, but he jolted with fright when a large bang sounded on the front door. Once, twice, then on the third bang a crunching noise filled the apartment as the door was kicked open.