by Kahlen Aymes
“That’s rubbish, but even if it were true, you didn’t have to meet him for that,” I stated simply. “Especially not at some obscure park in Beverly Hills.”
“I know. He said he’d gotten in a fight with his girlfriend and she kicked him out of the car. He needed a ride.” She shook her head and started to pace again. “I know it’s ridiculous, but I didn’t think much about it. I was out in my car already. I could give him a ride. No big deal.”
My jaw tightened. “You knew he wanted you, and you knew what I said about his reputation on every fucking movie he ever worked on. How could you put yourself in that position?” I demanded. The skin of my face felt hot as it flushed. I hated that bloody bastard more than I’d ever hated anyone and she knew it. I’d always thought he was after her. I could see it in the way he looked at her, but she’d always blown me off like I was insane for even thinking it. Now, she knew I was right.
“I was stupid, Cade. I don’t have another explanation. I had no reason to doubt him. He’d always been nice and respectful.”
“Because he knew I’d beat the hell out of him if he touched you, and for no other reason.”
She was still pacing in front of me. “Maybe.”
I should have, I thought miserably. “Go on.”
“When I got there, he asked me to get out of the car to talk about the movie. It didn’t seem like a big deal. When he came up behind me and pushed me against a tree, then held me there with his body. I didn’t expect it. I got away within seconds. The one picture that looks like I’m holding him was really me pulling his arms away so I could move. It was so uncomfortable and, to be honest, I was stunned. When you look at those fucking pictures, you can see him looking over his shoulder at the photogs. I haven’t figured out why he’d want to set me up like that.”
“Because his career is in the toilet and the world will forget him in a week and a half, while you are a hot commodity right now, Brook!” I spat. “He’ll go down in infamy for breaking us up!”
Her head dropped and she started crying again. “Not if we don’t let him.”
I stared at her and sighed deeply. “What about the kiss?”
“He was sorry, he said. He asked me to drive him home. I didn’t want to hear it, especially, but it made sense. On the way, things got weird. I stopped and told him to get out of the car. He came at me then, Cade…” her voice broke, “if you’ve looked at those pictures you see how I was pulling away from him. He came at me and I tried to back away, but that car was small. I screamed at him at the top of my lungs and slapped him, but, of course, no pictures surfaced of that part of it. I got out of the car because he wouldn’t. He came around, and then I kneed him in the groin and left.” She fell to her knees in front of me sobbing. “I need you to believe me. Cade, please. Those pictures aren’t what they seem.”
I wanted to. Christ did I want to. “Is that all?”
She shook her head. “By then, I knew the paps were on us. They weren’t even trying to hide anymore. I couldn’t just sit there and let them click away! I took off, but that’s not what hit the newsstands.”
Air rushed from my lungs as I looked into Brook’s crying face, the tears welling magnifying the blue color of her eyes as they pleaded with me to believe her. Without makeup, she looked so young, like when we’d first met. My mind flashed to another time when she was on her knees crying in front of me; the morning after the first wrap party when she asked me to kiss her. My heart exploded inside my chest.
Still, I couldn’t reconcile that she hid it all from me. “Why didn’t you tell me the day it happened?” My voice was still hard and I could feel my jaw stiffening of its own accord. “You didn’t trust me enough. I thought we told each other everything!” I practically shouted.
A sob broke from her chest and her hand reached for mine. “I wanted to, but I was scared you’d believe the worst, after what you’d expected of him and I didn’t want to upset you. We had the MTV thing the next day. I just wanted it to go away. I know I should have told you, but that is the only thing I’m guilty of.”
“Then why did you publicly humiliate me with that apology speech?” My fingers held hers back against my will. “You basically admitted an affair.”
“I thought I was only admitting I love you… not that I cheated on you. I needed you to hear me and I didn’t care what it cost. I didn’t know how else to make sure you knew. You were all… are all that matters.”
She wiped at her nose with the wad of Kleenex clutched in her fist. Her shoulders were trembling, her pain as tangible as my own.
“I’m so sorry! I didn’t know what else to do. I just needed to talk to you.” Her fingers tightened on mine, begging me to thread mine through. “I don’t want to lose you.”
"Now that prick is flapping his jaw. Something has to be done to quell the damage.”
“I don’t care what he says,” Brook said, still crying hard. “I only care what you believe.”
What she said made sense and I was a bastard for not listening to her the day I left. I couldn’t fight it anymore. I launched forward onto my knees and pulled her tightly to me. We clung together, falling apart in each other’s arms.
“Please forgive me, Cade. I need you to forgive me. I love you so much!” Her little hands clutched at the flesh of my back so hard it stung through my shirt.
“If I want to make it until tomorrow, I have no choice. I can’t live without you. Even if you had shagged him.”
Her arms tightened and she cried even harder into the curve of my neck. “Buh…buh… but, I didn’t!”
“I know, sweetheart. It’s going to be okay, Brook.” My hands stroked her hair and I kissed the side of her face, the salt of her tears landing on my tongue. I knew her better than I knew myself; there was no way she’d be such a mess if she weren’t telling the truth. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”
I knew we’d have hell to pay, but we would handle it by saying nothing, by going on with life as if that bullshit had never happened and refusing to talk about it with anyone ever again.
She pulled back and I cupped her face, wiping at her tears with both thumbs. “What will we do? What will we tell everyone, I mean?”
“Nothing.” I shrugged. “We’ll just be together. The world can fuck off. We don’t have to justify being together to anyone other than each other. Jeanne and Denise can deal with the press. Joel can file a lawsuit against Richards if he doesn’t stop the lies. ”
Her fingers curled into the front of my shirt and she nodded. “I want to kiss you, but I’m full of snot.”
“Me, too.” It didn’t matter, though. I had every intention of kissing her senseless.
We kissed long and hard, both of us starving for the other and for the first time in weeks I could feel my chest relax and that sick, empty feeling began to ebb. I was overcome with relief. My life had just been given back to me and I was never going to let go of her again.
I finally pulled her with me onto the bed and we clung together like children for what seemed like hours. Part of me wanted to make love, but I just needed to hold her close to me and know that we were fine.
“I love you,” Brook sighed. On the precipice of exhausted sleep, she snuggled closer into my neck, her arm wrapped around my middle. The warmth of her breath against my skin and her body plastered up against mine reassured me that this was real.
“I love you… and I’m sorry I was an idiot and didn’t let you explain before.”
“I’m sorry I was stupid and didn’t tell you the minute it happened.”
My lips lifted in a smirk at how much misery we could have saved if we’d just talked it out. “We’re ridiculous, you know that right?”
She smiled and we both laughed out loud. It was the most beautiful sound I never thought I’d hear again.
"UGHHHH... MISS YOU," I said into the empty hotel room as if she could hear me. I loved this film and the cast was incredible, but I felt hollow. Things were easier now that the world knew
about Brook and me, but the separations still killed us. This film was a period piece split between London and a villa in the South of France. I felt ridiculous in the period costumes.
The time in London wasn't so bad. I had my family and especially my mates to keep my mind off of how much I missed the one person I missed the most.
Brooklyn.
Her name throbbed inside my head and bounced around my chest. It hurt. Everything hurt. Her birthday was coming up and it would be the first time in three years we weren't together for it.
The love scenes for my current film were shot in London and Brook teased me about screwing the bloody minions, but I knew she was covering. I'd be a mess if it were reversed. After the Sheldon scare we were stronger, but some parts of this job never got any easier.
Brook came to London for Fashion Week and then we'd flown back to New York together for a premiere of Only Us and some promotional shit she needed to do for Dystopia. The time in New York was wonderful. My heart was so full having her with me at my premiere. She'd insisted on coming in late, without fanfare, saying that it was Davina's night and she didn’t want to detract from that. It had taken all I had to convince her to show up at all, but having her there with my family had been incredible. We went to the after parties, openly together, and even though we didn’t feel the need to sneak around as much, the paparazzi were still ruthless. We were seen together, we held hands, they saw her coming and going from my house more often, but we hadn’t admitted we were together when asked in interviews. It was a question I was getting good at dodging.
I drew in a deep breath and looked at the clock next to the bed. Ten hours separated us. It was only 6 AM in Los Angeles, and I had some scenes to shoot later so wouldn't be available for a call in the middle of her day. I hated not hearing her voice in the morning.
I pulled out the shirt I kept under my pillow and pressed it to my nose. It was my shirt, but she'd slept in it for two nights in New York before she left to fly back to L.A while I flew back to Europe to resume filming. I inhaled deeply. The scent of Brook’s perfume and the smell of her skin were getting fainter, but still I found it comforting.
I had Denise doing everything she could to get me off this damn set for a few days over Brook’s birthday. Brook had a big push for Dystopia soon and would be busy and unable to come here. I’d seen the rushes and she was amazing in it. My heart swelled with pride. I was upset I couldn't be with her at her premiere like she had been with me mine. Her attitude was somewhat nonchalant, telling me to get over it.
My phone rang. I set the shirt aside and answered.
"Hey, Denise, did you get the schedule fixed?"
"Unfortunately, nothing can be changed, Cade. You know how this crap works. The production crews and locations are scheduled. I'm sorry, honey."
My heart fell to my stomach. "Yeah, I figured as much. Thanks for trying." Disappointment throbbed through me. "It's just... I haven't been away from her for her birthday since we met, and this is her twenty-first."
"What's Brook's schedule like? Can she come to you?"
"I've thought about it, but she has so much going on and her parents might want to celebrate it with her. Outside of her dad coming to Vancouver during Don’t Forget to Remember Me, she hasn't spent her birthday with her family since I’ve known her."
Something rustled on the other end of the phone. "Cade, if Brook had her choice, where would she be?"
I smiled because I couldn't help myself. "I see where you're going, but I'd feel selfish asking her."
"Selfish, smelfish... I’ll call Jeanne."
My phone beeped as another call came in. "I have to go. I'm due on set in thirty minutes, so I'll talk to you later."
"Sure. I'll let you know what I find out. Bye."
"Hello?" I clicked over to the other call.
"There's my British boy." I could hear the sleep in Brook’s voice and instantly pictured her all rolled up in her bed. "Whatcha' doin'?" she asked.
"Missing you."
"Yeah, yeah. Besides that."
"Getting ready to go to set. It's awfully early for you, love."
"I knew I wouldn't get to talk to you if I didn't call early. I just wanted to tell you that I love you and miss you madly."
"Me, too. I wish I had more time to talk." I started out of the room and down to the lobby where Bill and the other bodyguards waited. It was easier outside of the United States, but it was still madness to a degree.
"It's okay. I'll get up and make Lucky breakfast."
I smiled. He was growing up fast and I adored him. He barked in the background as if he knew Brook was speaking to me. “I miss him.”
“He misses you, too. He sleeps on your pillow.”
"What do you want for your birthday?"
"Nothing." I could picture her chewing on her lower lip. "I have you."
"Not when I'm bloody stuck on the other side of the world."
"It's not forever, baby." She said the words, but I wasn't convinced she was as fine as she wanted me to believe. "You’ll be home soon, and we have the promotional tour for A Love Like This. Last one."
I heard the sadness in her voice.
"Yes, but Denise sent me my itinerary and I can't go with you and Noah to Australia, Mexico, Spain... should I keep going?"
"No. I get the point. You better get your sexy ass to work. Call me later. Even if you'll wake me up. Promise?"
"Okay, sure."
"Mmmm... Will you add me to your ravished minions, Gerard?"
She called me by my new character name and I chuckled at her funny French accent. It was horrible.
"Uh... no. I could not ravish you without losing my heart. The others are only a means to an end, while you, my dear, are the end in itself," I said, my own French accent practiced and polished with a voice coach for my role.
"Bleh," she said and then fell into a soft laugh.
"Seriously, Brook. I really miss you, love." My voice was once again my own. "I wish..."
"You wish?"
"Well, I don't want to be away from you on your birthday."
She sighed on the phone. "No biggie. It's just another day, and you know that weekend Dystopia opens nationwide. We'll celebrate soon."
"Not soon enough. I have to go, sweetheart. Tell your family I said hello. Especially your mum."
"Love you, sexy beast. I really love you, Cade."
“Love you, too, Brook. Bye for now, love." My heart thumped as I closed my phone and shoved it back into the pocket of my pants.
I WENT DOWNSTAIRS and flopped on the couch in the den. Nathan was visiting; playing Guitar Hero on Cade’s PlayStation. He glanced in my direction, but didn't stop his attack on the Aerosmith song he was working.
"Hey," he said.
I picked up Lucky and wrapped my arms around him. He nuzzled my chin and licked my cheek. I kissed the top of his furry head. "Hey. Wanna do something today? I'm bored."
"Doesn't Jeanne have you busy promoting the film?" He finished the song, put the game on hold, and then sat down in the big chair opposite me.
I stretched my legs out in front of me and continued to stroke the puppy. "Not today. I'm thinking I'm gonna blow off the London premiere."
Nathan's eyes widened. "What? I thought you'd want to go and hang with Cade's Family."
I shrugged. Cade was leaving for France the next day and would just miss me. "London won't be the same without him. It's bad enough in L.A." He looked at me for a moment, studying my bland expression. I glanced up at him. "What?'
Nate shook his head. "Nothing. I never thought I'd hear you say you wanted to skip something for this film. You were so jacked to get this role."
I shrugged again. "I know. I guess my priorities have changed."
Nate got up and went toward the kitchen. "Want something to drink? I’m thirsty."
"Nah. Thanks, though." I stared at the ceiling and ran a hand through my hair when Lucky hopped off my lap and settled next to me. The wide release of my film was
the same weekend as my birthday, and even though I told Cade it didn’t matter, I was sad we wouldn’t be together. "Nate, does Mom or Dad have anything planned for my birthday?" I called loudly, so he could hear me in the other room. The refrigerator door opened and shut with a bang before he wandered back into the room. With their separation it might be better just to skip any family gatherings for a while.
He was scratching his stomach through the dark red T-shirt he was wearing over his jeans. "Even if I knew, I couldn't tell you, sis. Mom would have my ass."
I turned and lay down on the couch when he returned to the big chair he’d been sitting in. "Please? I really need to know."
My brain was racing, remembering how much fun it had been to surprise Cade on that first Christmas in London, between shooting our first two films. My heart ached and I felt so empty without him. There couldn't be a better birthday present than seeing him.
"Why? You haven't made plans, have you? You said Cade will still be working in France, so...."
"Yeah, exactly." I looked him in the eye and his eyebrows shot up.
"Are you thinking of going to France?"
I bit my lip. "More like just decided. I spoke to him this morning and we're... it's been over a month since we've seen each other. I know, you think I'm sappy, and but I miss him."
"Maybe two years ago I would have considered it sappy, but not after you two got together. How's he doing over there?"
"Okay. I'm sure the film will be brilliant, but he's lonely. I can hear it in his voice. So? Do they have plans for my birthday or what?"
"Yeah. Mom and I were coming to the London premiere."
My heart fell slightly at the possibility of disappointing my mom, but I knew he'd understand if I explained.
“That’s really sweet, but I'm sorry, but I have to do this. I’ll pay him back for the tickets and hotels. Or why don’t you still go? It’s the next best thing to my being there.”
