Jaded: The First Cut is the Deepest

by Shawn C. Thompson

  I strutted through the automatic doors and admired the large glass windows and pristine white leather furniture. I took a seat in the large yet inviting lobby and picked up the latest vogue magazine to occupy my time until the appointment.

  “Ivory Carter.” A voice called twenty minutes later.

  I turned my attention to the friendly looking intern who shook my hand the moment I stood up.

  “That’s me.” I said, flashing a quick smile.

  The man placed his hands in the pockets of his maroon scrubs and led me to consultation room.

  “Would you like anything while you wait?”

  “A bottled water would be great.” I responded as he slipped off to fetch my water.

  I hummed to the jazz that played softly in the background and brushed my fingers through my hair.

  A few minutes later, the man returned with a water and two additional men in toe. From the difference in attire, I could tell that the other two were doctors.

  “Hello Mrs. Carter, I’m Dr. Morgan.” the first of the men announced.

  He looked to be about fifty with deep set wrinkles, prominent ears and brown hair that was balding at the top. I met his gaze at the rim of his glasses which were fixated at my breasts.

  “Nice to meet you.” I returned, giving him a closed mouth smile and crossing my arms to cover my chest. “I see you are already sizing up what might need to be done.”

  My comment instantly made him turn red and place his eyes where they were meant to be. The second man chuckled at my sarcasm.

  “Sorry about Dr. Morgan, he has a habit of staring. I’m Dr. Griffin, the two of us will be handling your consultation and surgery if you come to that conclusion.”

  Dr. Griffin was a salt and pepper haired chocolate man who seemed to be the same age as his partner but took better care of himself. When he smiled, I admired his pearly white teeth, even though the bottoms were slightly crowded.

  “It’s okay. I’m sure I’m not the only women whose breasts he's seen being that this is a surgeon's office and all.”

  I chucked to lighten the mood as we all took a seat at the circular shaped table.

  “But, as with most things in life, business before pleasure.” Dr. Morgan chimed in, pulling out a pin and small pad. “So what brings you in today? Your chart said something about a nose job?”

  “Well…” I began, feigning insecurity. “Not necessary a NOSE job, I just wanna shave it down slightly.”

  In all honesty, I would never think about changing my already petite nose but for the sake of the situation at hand, it was the only body part of mine I was willing to show to two old men.

  “I think your nose looks just fine.” Dr. Griffin admitted.

  His colleague nudged his arm in an attempt to stop him from persuading me to do otherwise.

  “But I can see why you might want to have it touched up. Looks like there’s a slight hump on the bridge.”

  Dr. Morgan came over to the opposite end of the table to examine my nose. The unusual amount of closeness made it easy to tell he was a cigarette smoker.

  As he delicately rubbed my nose, I kept my eyes closed to avoid eye contact with his perverted ass.

  “Hmm we can definitely correct this minor imperfection. Reduction rhinoplasty on you would be like transforming a ten to a twenty.”

  I nodded and briefly opened my eyes to see Dr. Griffin taking notes.

  “Now Mrs. Carter, a procedure like this is fairly simple and should cost you about seven thousand but I’ll bump it down to six if you’d allow me to take you out sometime.”

  I looked Dr. Morgan directly in his eyes.

  “I’d rather pay the seven thousand.”

  I could hear his partner snickering as a defeated Dr. Morgan quickly reclaimed his seat.

  “Seven thousand it is.” He spat back. “When were you interested in having the procedure completed? We have an opening from a cancelled appointment that’s in two weeks.”

  I crossed my legs as I pulled out my phone to pretend as if I was checking my schedule. When I did, a text message from Myla’ caught my attention.

  GET EM BITCH! She wrote

  I chucked and placed my phone down.

  “Two weeks is fine. There is one thing I’m a little concerned about.”

  I knew the question I was about to ask was stupid but it was necessary.

  The surgeon's both leaned forward in anticipation.

  “Will I need to be put underneath anesthesia for the rhinoplasty process?”

  “Of course Mrs. Carter.” Dr. Griffin responded “Our reasoning for placing our patients underneath anesthetics ranges from epileptic shock to death.”

  My eyes grew wide.

  “Yes, beauty is pain but in this instance it could be fatal if we didn’t put you under. Why do you ask?” Dr. Morgan questioned, adjusting his glasses.

  I looked down at the floor.

  “I'm afraid of being put underneath anesthesia. The thought of it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. Are you sure you guys just can’t numb me or something? I don’t feel completely safe being put to sleep by someone I don’t know.”

  “No Mrs. Carter, unfortunately it is a necessessity.” Dr. Griffin reasoned “I promise our anesthesiologist is beyond capable of keeping you safe and sound. Maybe meeting him would make it less of an anxiety for you.”

  I fought the sinister smile forming on my face.

  “Why yes, I think that might help.”

  Dr. Griffin and I shot the breeze while the other doctor went to grab the anesthesiologist. When he returned, my eyes were finally able to grace the face of Delano Gathers.

  He was just as enchanting as I had imagined and then some! Although attractive in pictures, they certainly didn’t do his dark, tall, and handsome features justice. When he walked up to greet me, I could tell from the look in his eye that the attraction was mutual.

  “If you'll excuse us, Dr. Morgan and I are needed in the operating room. We'll leave you two to talk.”

  Dr. Griffin grabbed his notes and briskly walked away with his partner in crime.

  “You must be Ivory Carter. I’m Delano Gathers the anesthesiologist.” His baritone voice announced.

  I prayed my knees wouldn’t give out as I stood up to greet him.

  “That’d be me.” I paused to give him a good look. “I was wasn’t aware that you’d be so...”

  “Tall.” He finished. “I get that a lot. Dr. Mason said you were having pre-surgery jitters? That is very normal for a first timer.”

  Our eyes and hands remained locked as we spoke.

  “First timer? Who’s to say I haven’t had work done before?”

  “I can tell you’re all natural, trust me.” He said, winking.

  “Well there’s definitely no fooling you.” I bit my bottom lip and let go of his hand. “I just don’t like the idea of someone else controlling my fate.”

  “God is God and I am not.”

  “But you are certainly built like one.” I returned boldly. “I think I’ll be able to muster up some courage within the next two weeks.”

  “Hopefully so. I’d love to have the honor of putting you to sleep.”

  I could feel the heat in the conversation rising.

  “So what makes you interested in getting rhinoplasty done? You look fine to me.” Delano flirted, using his eyes to roam every inch of my body.

  “Mmm I don’t know, we all have our insecurities.” I said, giving a hardy chuckle.

  “I woman like you insecure? I find that hard to believe.”

  I could tell from his forwardness that this wasn’t his first time flirting with clients on the job.

  “Well believe it. The way the world is today, women are expected to live up to perfection while men are provided the opportunity to be who they are.”

  “And you would want to be a statistic to that?” Delano licked his lips. “Please tell me you aren’t here because a boyfriend told you that you needed some work done.”

/>   Before this moment, I hadn’t thoroughly considered my excuse for surgery so his comment made it easy to accept.

  “Actually, that’s partly the reason. My fiancé left me for a more youthful woman and I felt my looks have been compromised over the years, particularly my nose. Especially after the pregnancy.”

  “Gotcha. I’ve heard stories of women whose noses grew like Pinocchio during pregnancy and never went back to size. But, if your man is truly yours, he’d understand this and accept you regardless of your flaws.”

  “Try telling him that.” I countered.

  “No need. A woman like you doesn’t need a man like that.”

  “I didn’t know matchmaker was apart of your resume.”

  He moved in closer to hand me his card.

  “That amongst other things.”

  A soft buzzing coming from his jacket pocket notified him that he was needed in surgery as well.

  “Thank you for your time. Hopefully you’ll put my card to good use.” He said hurriedly as he dashed out of the entrance.

  I stayed in the consultation room for a few seconds longer, ultimately deciding that I should high-tail it out of there before one of the doctors came back to check on me.

  It wasn’t like I actually planned on having the surgery.

  I grabbed my belongings and put on my Ray Bans to exit the establishment unnoticed. Before I could even get myself situated in the driver’s seat, I received a text from an unfamiliar number.

  Ivory,

  Nice meeting you today. Hopefully we can schedule a meeting off the record if you know what I mean.

  He didn’t even have to leave his name for me to know that it was Delano.

  “It’s like shooting fish in a barrel.” I said to myself.

  CHAPTER 7

  Myla- Somewhere in ATL (Six years earlier)

  “Girl you workin with some ass yeah, you badd yeah. You can ride in the jaggah with DADDYY!”

  The crowd shouted as nineties hits blasted through the surround-sound speakers of the club. The Gold Room off Piedmont Road was poppin as usual with my girls working the stage and me working the floor, flirting with all the fine and not-so-fine brothas to collect the most important thing a money-hungry, twenty-two-year-old sista could want - A FAT ASS CHECK.

  I briefly stopped by one of the many exits of the club and used a gold platform to gaze at my heavenly exterior. There was nothing left to the imagination in my revealing green lace outfit and silver thigh high boots. My hair was styled in blonde finger waves, making sure to stay true to our nineties themed fashion.

  The diamond belly piercing I wore shimmered as I sashayed across the floor and towards the main stage with tequila shots balanced delicately on the platter I was holding.

  “Excuse me baby.” A man called in deep bravado, grabbing me by the hand and stopping me in my tracks. Now usually this aggressive gesture would have landed him a slap in the face but when I turned around I was instantly smitten.

  The man that stood before me was sexy as hell. He was dark-skinned with a bald head, pretty teeth and damn-near flawless, except the scar above his eyebrow.

  I looked him over and clicked my tongue, doing my best to play “hard-to-get”.

  “What do you want?” I shot annoyingly.

  “A drink.” He grinned and took a shot before I could offer. “I’m Roland James the third.”

  “I didn’t ask you that.”

  He frowned which made me second guess if I was playing my role a little too well.

  “I mean, nice to meet you. I’m Myla Reeves.” I corrected.

  “Myla like the singer, such a beautiful name.” Roland complimented, downing the shot and grabbing another.

  “Thanks, those aren’t free by the way. They’re twenty dollars a pop.”

  He almost choked the moment those words came out of my mouth.

  I snickered at my white lie.

  “I’m joking playa; they are only five.”

  Roland wiped his lips and chuckled.

  “I was about to say, y’all can have that shit. My boy and I stay hip on the liquor.”

  “Your boy?” I questioned, shifting my weight from side to side in search of his plus one.

  “Yeah. Yo B, get your ass over here and come meet this lil lady.”

  The guy that approached the conversation was far from the type I thought would hang with Roland. Although he was cute in his own right with green eyes, an aquiline nose, and sandy brown hair, he seemed much too sweet to be in any club.

  “Myla this is Beau Devereux, Beau this is Myla Reeves.”

  We nodded to acknowledge one another.

  “I apologize in advance for my friend’s behavior. Roland can be a bit much at times.” Beau said, handing me the money to cover Roland’s drinks.

  “Thanks, it didn’t take me long to figure that out.” I winked. “What brings you to a place like this? I’d know a regular when I see one.”

  “Roland dragged me out here to have drinks and help him recover from a break-up with his girl Monae.”

  “Well, tell her my life-story why don’t you?” Roland seethed, cutting his eyes at his friend.

  “Look at me like that again and I will.” Beau shot back.

  Amusement was evident on my face as I watched them fight like brothers.

  “How long have you guys known one another?” I asked.

  “A few years. We met in college and played on the same basketball team. Of course I was the better player. In fact, I was the STAR player.” Roland answered proudly.

  He puffed his chest out to show his dominance.

  I could see Beau rolling his eyes from behind.

  “That’s cute. I could certainly see you being a jock back in the day.”

  “And why is that.”

  “You really wanna know?” I challenged, lifting an eyebrow.

  “Yes, please satisfy an inquiring mind.”

  “Because you come off as arrogant and full of yourself.” I admitted.

  Beau laughed and Roland’s face fell flat from embarrassment. I saw one of my girls waving at me to join her near the front of the club.

  “But don’t worry it looks cute on you.” I finished, focusing my eyes to see what was going on “Excuse me, I gotta check on something.”

  I heard Roland calling after me while I weaved through the crowd and over to my homegirl Latasha.

  “Everything good here?” I asked, smiling at the group of gentlemen that surrounded us. I could tell they had major paper because of the Rolex’s that adorned their wrists.

  “Never been better.” Latasha pipped, grabbing the last three glasses on my platter. “These are my new friends. Fellas, this is my girl Myla.”

  They all nodded and smiled, letting me know I was an instant hit.

  I looked at the three men in front of us and maintained a smile. Although none of them were my type, the excitement on Tasha’s face was enough to let me know she wanted me to get in on the fun. One of the men in particular hadn’t taken his eyes off me since I approached, visibly showing his interest.

  “You are one of the baddest women I have ever seen in my life.” The man stated bluntly. When I made eye contact with him, he reached over to return one of the tequila shots.

  “No, I’m good. I don’t drink on the job.” I replied, wincing at the thought.

  “C’mon Myla! Don’t ruin the man’s night!” Latasha encouraged.

  “It’s on me.” The man said, slipping me a bill.

  When he stood up, I immediately realized he was a lot taller than I had originally assumed. He had to be about six foot with light facial hair and a face that resembled Tyler the Creator.

  My eyes grew wide at the enormous tip.

  I tried to hand it back to him and he pushed my hand away.

  “I’m paying you for it. Relax and enjoy yourself, it must be hard being that fine having all these brothas hollering at you.”

  I thought about the consequences of drinking on the job and decided
a quick swig wouldn’t hurt.

  Latasha flirted and continued to entertain the men who kept their eyes on her enormously fake assets.

  As we talked, I learned that the man’s name was Avery Jones and that he was a media director at a place in inner Atlanta called Edmond and Associates. Judging from the pictures he had shown me of his house and car, they were paying him very well.

  “Wanna come see my car real quick, promise I won’t bite.”

  It had been an hour since we had initially met and I was already tipsy. I didn’t drink much so I figured it was the strength of the tequila.

  “Yeah sure, as long as we aren’t gone for too long.” I announced, looking over my shoulder to make sure my boss wasn’t lurking.

  I waved Tasha goodbye and went to follow Avery out to his car. Before I even made it out to the sidewalk, I felt my knees grow weak and my eyesight become blurry.

  My heart began to pace rapidly.

  What was happening to me?

  “I think I need an ambulance.” I slurred, turning around to head back inside.

  Avery grabbed me roughly and forced me into his backseat.

  I tried to fight but was too weak to resist.

  “Stop, help, get off of me!” I wailed.

  Everyone was inside and the club music was too loud for anyone to hear my screams.

  He ripped off what little I had on and hastily shoved his fingers inside of me while I screeched in pain.

  “Shut the fuck up stupid slut.” Avery bellowed, slapping me with his free hand. “You gonna work for this hunnit.”

  I cried as blood trickled from my mouth.

  The two men he came with walked up and I shouted out to them in desperation. Much to my surprise, they looked me directly in the eyes through the car window and laughed.

  “Pierce, Felton! Watch my back.” He demanded as he held me down.

  Without a word, they blocked both sides of the vehicle while he penetrated and abused my body.