Shrouded Destiny

by Richard William Bates

  Susan looked around the temple. No one was there. “Father Angelino?"

  "Yes, Susan. It's me."

  "Where are you?"

  "I'm right here.” Angelino materialized at the opposite side of the large circle, facing her. As in her dream, he was enveloped in a golden aura that shimmered brightly in the dimly lit room. He smiled.

  Susan regarded him warily.

  "Is this another dream?” she said.

  "No, Susan. This time it's not a dream."

  Susan furrowed her brow quizzically. “How come I didn't see these stones before? They are amazing."

  "Susan, you did not see them because you were not ready to see them. Now, it is time."

  "Time for what?"

  "To fulfill your destiny."

  Susan considered for a moment before responding. “Since the first day I met you, Father Angelino, you have told me I have a destiny to fulfill."

  "Yes, Susan, I have ... and you do."

  "I've thought much about it since the first time you said that to me. I've thought of little else, actually,” she smiled wryly. “For so long, I struggled and struggled with it. What could my destiny be? How many times did I furrow my brow in frustration, wondering what that destiny might be, and wondering what I needed to do to fulfill it? Many nights, it kept me lying awake at night. Other times, I was paralyzed with fear that my next words or my next actions would somehow divert me from that destiny, should they not be the ‘correct’ words or actions to take me toward it. It was a shrouded destiny ... a destiny always within reach, yet at the same time, veiled from me, flittering at the edges of my awareness, but always shrouded by the unknown and the unknowable.

  "It was so easy to succumb to the illusion I was being swept along by my destiny, as if riding a wave from which I might easily be thrown. I began to feel imprisoned by that destiny, and then grew to resent it. What was the point of life if I was just a mere pawn on a chessboard, marching toward a fate not of my own choosing?

  "Yet, I was finally confronted with the realization I had done nothing but make choices all my life. Like so many others, I had found it more reassuring to pretend I did not make the choices I had made. It wasn't my choice to cheat on that exam in fourth grade and that I had to take an ‘F’ for my math course that year. Jimmy Hansen made me do it. He dared me to. What choice did I have? I actually made myself believe that my entire life. It wasn't my choice I faked the pit bull fight footage four years ago. I had no choice. We needed the ratings and, after all, didn't everybody fudge their stories a bit?

  "It was a bitter pill to swallow when I finally had to admit to myself that even when I was a very young child, I was aware I acted of my own free will ... by choice. We do our children a grave disservice when we make the excuse for them, ‘they didn't know any better.’ They did know better. It is the parents’ job to constantly remind them they do.

  "I always resented it when people curtailed my choices ... having to sit quietly in class when I would rather have been chattering away with Barbara Hancock about our Barbie collections, being told how to hold the pen and paper in my hands when learning to write, being told to sit up straight at the dinner table. When I was assigned to the Vatican beat at NBS I resented how that limited my choices in my chosen profession. All my life I was angry at those who did not allow me the free exercise of my choices and at the same time, I denied that any consequences which befell me were precisely because of my free choices. How silly I was.

  "Then you threw that ‘destiny’ thing at me. Once more, here I was, told I had no choice in the matter of shaping my own future ... or at least that was what I thought I heard. Yet, there I was, making choice after choice. I was not coerced to go on tour with Armand Mathias and Jesus ... I chose to. I was not coerced into accepting a meaningless token appointment in the Crowley administration ... I chose to. I was not compelled to return with you to Indore to be taught by Raji ... I chose to. I look back on the series of events which end with me standing here talking to you and I see a pattern of inevitability, one act leading inexorably to the next, and so on and so on. I can extend that pattern all the way back to my earliest memories and see that the tapestry of my entire life has been woven by the choices I have made, and just as importantly, by the choices I did not make.

  "When I look back upon my life from the pinnacle of the present, I see a pattern to my choices. There were some choices which I always made the same, in similar situations ... for example, cheating on my math test and faking the videos ... other choices I always declined to make, such as getting caught up in social distractions in college, declining invitations to social gatherings at the stations I worked at, and so on. If I were to die this moment, it would be said of me ‘Susan's destiny was...’ and they would fill in that statement with a recitation of the path my life took.

  "So what, then, is destiny, I have been asking myself. Is it choice? Or is it compulsion? Any number of choices I made could have been made differently and my life would have veered in a totally different direction. Yet, I did not make other choices. Did I really choose, or were those choices already imbedded within me at birth merely to be activated at each decision point in my life?"

  "Have you found a satisfactory answer to that question, Susan?” Angelino's face did not betray any expected answer.

  "Yes, Father Angelino, I have. Destiny is that name which we give to the pattern formed by the choices we have made. We all have a destiny. No,” she corrected herself, “we all create a destiny. My mistake was in misunderstanding you to think mine was somehow more lofty or noble than anyone else's. That was my own conceit. My other mistake was in thinking there was a possible right or wrong destiny for me. My destiny is what it is ... what it has always been—the sum total of the choices I have made and will continue to make, as a free agent who has been granted the God-given freedom to decide.

  "When we understand, as Jesus—the true Jesus—did, that we have the freedom to walk away, only then does our decision to remain take on meaning. When we understand that only when we are confronted with the opportunity and the means to commit murder, but decline, does our choice to honor life become noble. Only if a potential choice to do good is counter-balanced by an equal potential choice to do evil, does the choice to do good become significant. When Jesus was confronted with his temptation in the garden at Gesthemane, he could have, at that moment, walked away from it all. He had that choice. But his greatness came in his choice to follow through with what he knew he must do. Had he walked away, we would never know his name today. Even the Son of God, Himself, lived within a reality in which choice could not be evaded.

  "That is the lesson which mankind needs to learn now. Not that he is free to make choices, but that he can never avoid them. He cannot manipulate his way out of the path of the consequences of his choices, however it may appear he has gotten away with so doing. Always, the choices he makes bear consequences. He can never escape them. Indeed, this is the One Truth in which all other truths are encapsulated. The new commandment of the age is, ‘Thou shalt not evade thy choices.’”

  The aura surrounding Angelino seemed to brighten as Susan grew silent. “Your lesson has been learned, Susan,” he said strongly. “Another choice confronts you now. Stay, and take the path which will place you at the center of the new age, or go, and leave the work we have all sacrificed for go unfinished."

  Susan smiled. “Gee, Angelino, do you think you could load that choice a little more?"

  Angelino smiled. They both knew her choice had been made.

  Raji then materialized at the altar and the remaining Knights appeared one by one, each standing on one of the white squares around the perimeter of the circle. Angelino stepped on to the twelfth square.

  Raji announced in a ceremonial tone, “Vessel of the New Christ, take your place at the center of the Circle of the Ascension."

  Susan looked about with hesitation and then finally understood Raji had been referring to her. She moved uncertainly to the center slab.
The Twelve Knights all faced her, spread equidistance from each other around the perimeter of the circle.

  Raji continued what Susan realized was a ceremony for which she was the central focus.

  "The Christ, the Divine Essence of God in man, was given to mankind two thousand years ago. The Spirit of Christ dwelt within Yoshua ben Yoseff—Jesus, son of Joseph—of the village of Nazareth. Through Jesus, The Christ taught all who chose to hear the message that God dwells eternally within the heart of Man. He demonstrated to us that like the Father, Himself, we are each Divine and Holy in our true state. He repeatedly told us ‘I am the Way and the Light.’ He lived his life as a blueprint for all of us to follow. He was, in every sense, the Wayshower.

  "Yoshua took into his circle twelve men, twelve disciples who we have come to know as the Apostles. To each of them, he imparted a portion of the essence that makes up the Spirit of the Christ. The Christ knew his teachings would become distorted over time, that wicked men would pervert his messages; of Love, the Overcoming of Death, and of God dwelling within each of us, in order to enrich and empower themselves. He knew, too, the anti-Christ would someday come and use the distortion of his teachings to destroy all The Christ had imparted to Mankind. And so, The Christ gave, to each of the Twelve, one Key of the whole essence of The Christ, with the command they preserve the portion which had been entrusted to him and that it be passed down from generation to generation, until the day when the twelve descendants of the teaching, the Twelve Knights of the Ascension, would once again gather as one.

  "That day is now upon us. As the anti-Christ cuts a path of destruction across the earth, the seed of Christ is once again fertile. The great Gathering is about to be realized, as the body of Christ, disassembled so that it might survive, is reconstituted within the womb of the Vessel of The Christ, who has been made ready through trials of hardship and acts of love and kindness.

  "Vessel of Christ, prepare to accept His Essence!"

  Each of the twelve began to glow a bright gold. A strand of gold shot first from Nicole, striking Susan in her heart with almost physical force. She gasped aloud as Raji proclaimed, “From Nicole Chambleau, the Knight of Decision, hereby receive the essence of choice. Before anything can be conceived or created, the decision to create it must be made. The foundation of all that is, is the power to choose and decide."

  As Raji spoke, the golden beam glowed brighter and brighter, filling Susan with a breathless joy.

  Next, a beam shot forth from Raul Cassidy, joining with the beam from Nicole, causing Susan to gasp joyfully again.

  "From Monsignor Raul Cassidy, the Knight of Thought,” Raji said ceremoniously, “hereby receive the essence of thought. Thought is the first building block of creation. Once the decision to create has been made, the thought of what is to be must follow. At the creation, when God said, ‘Let there be light!’ only then was there light. Even in the mind of God, Himself, first came the thought of light before the actual light itself."

  Next, was Eli, one of the sons of Raji. A beam of golden light from him was added to the others.

  "From Eli, the Knight of Imagination, hereby receive the essence of imagination. Joined with the power of thought, imagination defines the limits of Man. Only to the degree Man limits himself through his imagination, is he truly limited. When he understand this, it is through his imagination that he removes the shackles which bind him to this plane and is free to become anything he wishes to be, go anywhere he wishes to go, do anything he wishes to do."

  A golden beam from the Aztec priest, Imahoptec, shot from him to Susan. She was quivering with ecstatic joy now, her breath shallow and fast. A sublime smile covered her face as she surrendered to the powers flowing to her from the others.

  "From Imahoptec, the Knight of Joyfulness, hereby receive the essence of joy. Only the joyful heart can truly know God. When one surrenders to their inner joy, the doorway opens so God might enter and dwell within the heart of the one who so surrenders himself."

  Malla Kumbata, the Zulu priestess, was next.

  "From Malla Kumbata, the Knight of Power, hereby receive the essence of power. Power is the ability to do with effectiveness. When one combines the forces of decision, thought, and imagination, with a joyful spirit, they manifest power. They get things done with efficient effectiveness. Power is that which takes the creative forces and give them force and movement."

  Next, was the essences offered by Raji's other son, Bartholomew. Once again, a beam of gold light was added to the others as he offered his essence to her.

  "From Bartholomew, the Knight of Forgiveness, hereby receive the essence of forgiveness. The one who learns forgiveness understands a mystical truth. When one forgives another, it his himself who he releases from the bonds of hatred. The soul that practices forgiveness will find true peace.

  "From Yuri Andreyovic Popovich, the Knight of Persistence, hereby receive the essence of persistence. Only the man who gives up is ever truly defeated. Failure comes not from not succeeding but from not persisting past the appearance of failure. One is never beaten until they say they are."

  Another beam of golden light from Billy Red Deer wrapped around the others. Susan was lost in the experience with an abandon that bordered on sexual.

  "From Billy Red Deer, the Knight of Physical Strength, hereby accept the essence of endurance. Endurance is that which allows one to persist. A person of strength treats his physical body as a temple. As such, he takes care of what he eats and does not allow himself to pollute the temple with impurities. He cherishes God's gift of the form with which he faces the plane of physical existence.

  "From Rabbi Samuel Goldstein, the Knight of Faith, hereby accept the essence of faith. Faith is knowing. Faith is the state of mind which doubt cannot penetrate. Indeed, doubt dissolves into nothingness when confronted with faith. Faith knows no boundaries. All things are possible for the man of faith."

  "From Quon Lee, the Knight of Emotion, hereby accept the essence of emotions. When imagination and thought are charged with the magic of emotions, manifestation occurs. This is the secret of creation."

  The eleventh beam of gold shot from Yokamoto Naiguma.

  "From Yokamato Naiguma, the Knight of Passion, hereby receive the essence of passion. Passion ignites the soul with the fire of desire. When a man lives his life with passion, he lives it with devotion and commitment. All that he does he does with zeal and enthusiasm."

  The final golden beam emanated from Angelino. Susan gasped, letting out a deep moan of ecstasy. Her eyes rolled back in her head and her breathing grew more rapid and shallow. All twelve beams glowed brightly as they penetrated her heart.

  "From Antonio Angelino Sabbatini, the Knight of Love, hereby receive the essence of love. Love is the greatest of all powers. When a man harnesses the power of love, he taps into the very heart of God Himself. Love makes all it touches holy. Love makes visible the luster of the sunset. It gives melody to the songbird. It puts the joy into the laughter of the child. Love permeates all things. It is in every flower, in every tree, in every sunrise, in every child's eyes. Of all God's gifts to his creation, it is only love that is to be found in all things, from the tiniest subatomic particle to the majestic mountains of the Alps. Love is God and God is love."

  Raji grew silent and closed his eyes. Each of the priests stood in place with their eyes closed as well, as the golden beams of essence continued to flow with ever-increasing intensity into Susan's soul. Susan felt as if every molecule within her body was being transformed by the pure essence of the aspects of The Christ, which pulsed through her.

  At the point at which the beams struck her body, a large golden ball of energy began to form. At first it was like a small pebble. But gradually, it grew until it was as large as Susan herself. It enveloped her as it grew. Susan felt her very consciousness expand rapidly in an explosive eruption. She felt herself to be nowhere and everywhere simultaneously. Thought dissolved away until she was pure essence. Her physical body seemed to me
lt away into the totality of Oneness she was becoming. At a place where words did not exist and where thoughts and emotions met the very point of their origins, Susan saw God. Pure love and nameless joy flowed through her in a complex matrix of energy. Her consciousness existed simultaneously in all things, in all places. All duality disappeared and the true Oneness of Being engulfed her consciousness.

  It might have been a moment, it might have been eternity. To Susan, it was all the same. Gradually, the energy subsided and the bands of golden energy slowly faded from each of the Twelve Knights of the Ascension. Susan stood at the center of the circle, breathing heavily, her eyes still closed. Her body shuddered a few times and she moaned again.

  Slowly she opened her eyes. The twelve were still standing around her, each smiling at her. In unison, they each bowed to her and said, “Long live the Vessel of The Christ."

  Susan felt as if she were awakening from a dream as her awareness returned to the temple chamber. She blinked a few times as the heaviness of her physical form seemed to pull her toward the floor. She struggled to remain on her feet. Wooziness clouded her thinking for a few moments. She lifted the back of her hand to her forehead as she finally regained her equilibrium. Then, she smiled a smile of sublime peacefulness ... the smile of one who has answers to questions that others hadn't even thought to ask. Her eyes met those of Angelino, who beamed broadly back at her. She scanned the faces of the Twelve. All of them had expressions on their faces that were a mixture of bliss and relief. They had accomplished their purpose, at last.

  Angelino finally spoke. “Although he does not know it, the anti-Christ has been defeated here today. His apparent hold on the world is illusory. By manipulating the bombing of Israel, Jesus unknowingly transmuted us into the form in which our power is at its greatest. In this form, we are not limited by the laws of physical existence. We dwell now in the spiritual plane, the plane that is the source of all power. We exist in our true essence. Even these forms you see are mere representations of what we are. Of course, the physical forms we held before we passed over were representations, as well, but these forms are entirely the product of our conscious will.