Lost Memories (Honky Tonk Hearts)

by Thomas, Sherri

  “If you keep that up, I’m gonna explode.”

  The pressure of his hands on her hips held her in place. His heavy breath caressed her hair as he raised his head and stared.

  Did he feel as crazy as she did? Her fingers traveled his upper body, past his thick collarbone and through his hair. Heat like an inferno absorbed her as she tugged his mouth back to hers.

  His finger traced the V of her tank and drew the material down. “God, you’re sexy.”

  The ache within her built. She thrust her breasts toward him, wanting, searching for more.

  This isn’t a good idea, he’s my boss.

  His thumb grazed her pebbled nipples, and all thoughts of the right thing to do vanished into thin air. As she tasted the salty skin of his neck, she pressed her breasts to his chest.

  He groaned, and his fingers dug into her inner thighs, brushing her most intimate part. How could this be so wrong when it felt so right?

  Chapter Nine

  Pushing her head up and noting the dazed expression, Nick questioned the logic in staying any longer.

  Logic, hell.

  He’d thrown any common sense out the window the minute he picked up her hat and stood on her porch. The image of her lying beneath him refused to leave his mind—the swell of her breast, her long legs, and flat stomach. His fingers flexed and unflexed with the idea of pulling her shirt up to reveal her skin. A need, raw and primitive, raced through his veins.

  Slow down.

  If this thing between them stood any chance, he needed to let the feelings mature. Stood a chance? When had he decided to move forward? The notion bothered and elated him.

  Delicate hands came up to rest on either side of his cheeks and the beautiful gaze searched his features. He only wished he knew what she looked for.

  Bringing her mouth down, she grazed his chin, and he groaned. As much as the idea of ending the make-out scene killed him, he placed a finger over her lips to slow her down.

  She sucked his finger into her mouth; her tongue swirled around the digit.

  It took every ounce of his being not to give in to the urge to lay her back and show her what she did to him. “Darc...”

  Eyes glazed over with passion, her head went back, exposing her flesh.

  His restraint slipped as his finger traveled down her chin to trace the smooth column of her throat. Testosterone guided his moves, making any coherent thought impossible to grasp. He brought her mouth to his and plunged inside, his tongue seeking, exploring, wanting more.

  Delicate fingers bunched his shirt to the center of his torso, the cool air kissing his burning skin.

  Nick propelled her to lie back on the couch and raised the hem of her tank top. Never had he been aware of every nerve ending in his body. Just one more minute of this torturous, glorifying hell before he called a halt.

  Gazing down at her flushed cheeks and red, swollen lips, she made the picture-perfect image of hot sex.

  With one hand he smoothed her hair back while his other caressed her breast, her hip, and moved down her thigh. He placed his lips on her navel and tugged the waistband of her shorts down a fraction. The salt of her exposed flesh lingered on his tongue.

  He tugged her leg up and stopped short at the sight of a large scar on her inner thigh.

  “What happened?”

  She pushed him off and stood in one quick motion, straightening her cloths with jerky movements. “I...I was in a car accident a while ago.”

  “How long ago was your accident? It must have been recent for the mark to still be there.”

  Picking up her empty glass and his bottle, she hurried to the kitchen. “It will always be there.”

  When he imagined what she must have gone through, concern filled him. He followed her to the sink and placed his arms on either side of her. Her head bowed forward.

  “You get hurt anywhere else?” Not able to resist, his lips suckled the back of her neck.

  “It’s over, so let’s just drop it, okay?”

  Feeling somewhat out of balance at the new questions arising, he conceded to her request. “For now, if that’s what you want, but know this”—he shifted her around and motioned a finger between them—“can’t be a one-night fling. It’d make your job here too difficult.” He ran a finger down her soft, silky skin. “We have to be sure we want to take this to the next stage—for both our sakes.”

  “Didn’t we already?”

  He rested his forehead on hers before kissing her brow. Anything more than the brief contact he was sure to take her on the damn floor.

  “I should go. Don’t forget we’re riding in the morning.”

  ****

  Darcy pushed the hair back from her face and repositioned her new hat, images of the previous night never far from her mind. She’d tossed and turned during the night with a yearning Nick fueled and the torment his words brought.

  “You ready?”

  Leading a buckskinned horse, the object of her agony entered the barn. He crossed to T.J.’s stall and put an arm around her waist, pulling her to his chest. The smell of horse and leather, man and spice caused a whimper to escape as his lips brushed hers.

  This is not the time or the place. Not that that stopped her from enjoying the feel of him.

  “Mornin’.” His eyes darkened. “You taste like heaven.”

  “And what does heaven taste like?” She rested one hand on his tanned forearm and stared up into his sexy face. The feelings he aroused were new and frightening. She didn’t want to jeopardize her job or friendships, but to ignore the growing attraction between Nick and herself held the same effect of denying the air she needed to breathe.

  “You.” His smile lit up his eyes as he stepped away to put his horse’s lead rope through a bracket on the wall.

  Instantly, she missed the contact.

  “This is Ben.”

  She stroked the side of the horse’s neck. “Hi, Ben.”

  “Let’s get T.J.’s bridle on and we can ride.”

  A smile touched her lips at the notion of getting back in the saddle—the one familiar place.

  “Here.” He handed her the bridle and stepped forward to inspect the saddle she’d already put on T.J.’s back.

  As he tightened the cinch, she slipped the straps over the horse’s head and buckled the end.

  “Not bad. I’ll help you mount, then I want to show you the trails we’ve made in the woods. Once the guests arrive, we’ll be setting off on a two-night adventure.”

  A hand squeezed her knee, causing a spiral of nerves to giddy up through her. The idea of sleeping with this cowboy under a blanket of stars warmed her cheeks.

  Nick sauntered over to Ben, opened the gate, and led both horses through before mounting his own.

  Darcy glanced at the woods up ahead. Peace and serenity, her mind cleared. She straightened her shoulders, her muscles loosening and moving in rhythm with the horse.

  The muscles in his back moved when he shifted, and she recalled the warmth in those arms when they were wrapped around her, the safe, content feeling that had washed over her when he held her.

  “Wanna trot?” A thick leg brushing hers found her next to the man in question.

  His horse danced at the notion. “He knows I’m restless,” Nick said with a wink.

  She sucked in her bottom lip. “Definitely.”

  “Remember, if you wanna stop, sit back in the saddle and take a deep breath. If he doesn’t respond, pull his head around to your knee with one rein.” He demonstrated with his own mount.

  “I’ll be fine.”

  “Give him a slight squeeze with your legs and cluck once. If he doesn’t move, tap him—”

  “I got it already.” She squeezed and clucked before he finished his instructions.

  T.J. picked up the pace in an instant following the trail ahead of him.

  Joy and excitement filled Darcy as her bottom rocked in the seat with each jolt. She urged him faster. Wind whipped through her hair. Her eyes watered.
Laughter rang in her ears.

  Laughter.

  The spotted horse picked up speed, and she laughed harder as a red barn loomed in front of her.

  “I told you, you could do it, baby girl.” Warm arms hugged her as she hopped down from the saddle. A floral perfume surrounded her.

  “You looked great up there, kiddo.”

  She laughed as an army uniform picked her up and twirled her around.

  Angry eyes of a younger man glared in her direction as the older gentleman set her feet on the ground.

  “Didn’t she do good, Lance?”

  “Yeah, sure. She’s perfect,” the boy snarled. “As always.”

  “Whoa!”

  The loud voice startled Darcy. A hand filled her vision, reaching over to grab her reins. T.J. came to an abrupt stop, and she flew forward into the saddle horn, her chin bouncing off the horse’s neck.

  “Darcy?”

  She blinked until Nick’s concerned features came into view.

  He dismounted and held on to her horse’s reins. “What the hell were you doing?”

  “What? I-I’m...” She took in her surroundings noting the absence of a red barn. A panicky feeling washed over her. Sweat beaded under her shirt. Where was the couple who embraced her?

  Dark eyes glared. “I called to you, but you didn’t answer.”

  “I’m sorry. I got lost in my thoughts.”

  A doubtful look crossed his features, teeth tightly gritted together. “Get down. Now.”

  Oh God. I screwed up. She swung her leg over the horse’s rump and once her feet hit the ground found herself pulled into Nick’s arms. “You veered off the path and came close to going face first into the ravine.”

  He pointed a few feet beyond the trees where the bank dropped off to a bottomless pit surrounded by ridged rocks.

  She swallowed. Her heart hammered in her chest and bile rose in her throat. The memory was so vivid she would’ve sworn it was real.

  “Why’d you go off the path?”

  “I-I don’t know.” She rubbed her temples. More flashes of her past. The gentle man. The reddish-brown haired woman. The angry boy.

  “Darc, what’s going on?” He grasped her shoulders, his eyes penetrating hers.

  Hands forced her shoulders down, holding her trapped as he tried to kiss her. She screamed and kicked as a door crashed open.

  “Get off...”

  Darcy yanked away from the hands. Not able to decipher her vision from the present, she lowered her head and stared at ground. How did she explain her glimpses of the past?

  “Look at me, damn it.”

  Slowly she raised her head.

  Concern and anger shown in Nick’s features. The tight clench of his jaw and cold stare made her step back.

  “This stops here and now. Something’s been wrong since the day you came here. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.”

  Jordan’s words came back at her. “You have to tell him. What if something happens?”

  “I want to know now.”

  “I had a flashback,” she blurted out.

  “A flashback?” Brown eyes narrowed. “Can you elaborate please?”

  She snared several deep breaths before answering. “Remember the car accident I mentioned? Well, since the eighteen-wheeler smashed into my car, I haven’t been able to remember anything of my past.” She glanced at the ground then at his handsome face.

  Disbelief and confusion registered in his eyes. Arms folded across his chest. “You have amnesia?”

  “Yes.”

  A long moment passed as he studied her. The urge to squirm under his intense glare escalated.

  “My God. You’re serious.”

  “Yes.”

  “Does anyone on the ranch know?”

  She kicked at a stone with the toe of her boot. “N-no.”

  “Did the idea ever occur to you to tell one of us? What if something serious happened? Hell, Darcy, you could have killed yourself just now.” His arms flailed out in exasperation.

  “I know.” She rubbed her temples again. “I’m sorry.”

  “Do you remember anything? Your family?”

  “I don’t even know if I have one.”

  “What about Jordan? Does she know?”

  “Yes. We became friends when she was my nurse. She let me stay with her until my memory came back...but it never did so...”

  “You moved in with a stranger.” His eyes widened then narrowed, and he shook his head. “You accepted this job without saying a word.”

  “Everyone’s a stranger to me, Nick. And would you have hired me if you knew?”

  The answer lay in his frown.

  “No one else did either. I needed this job. I wanted a life.” Frustrated tears ran down her face, but she refused to acknowledge the weakness. “Tell me how you’d feel—I had no family, no job, no friends, and no idea where I’m from. I don’t even know what my favorite food is.”

  “Strawberry jelly.”

  “What?”

  His lips gave a little quirk. “Your favorite food. You put strawberry jelly on everything; your toast, your pancakes, your crackers. I’ve even seen you put it on meatloaf.

  He’s right. How did he...

  Her head pounded and knees threatened to give out. “Can we go back, please?”

  Nick crossed to his horse, extracted a rope out of his saddlebag, clipped it onto her horse’s bridle and secured the line to Ben. “Mount up.”

  Longing to curl up on her bed and sleep the rest of the day away, she pulled tight, heavy muscles into the saddle.

  Nick slid a glance to the woman beside him. He didn’t have a clue as to what went through Darcy’s mind when she’d raced past him with the most beautiful, carefree smile plastered on her lips. At first, he believed her having fun—only to have his stomach lurch to his throat when she led her horse toward the ravine.

  Now her face was pale and pinched and she sat ramrod straight.

  “I’m sorry.”

  He strained to hear her words and surveyed the vacant look in her eyes. “Darc?”

  A hand swiped at her nose as her sniffle caused an ache in his chest.

  He sighed in anger and frustration warred with compassion and the need to comfort her. His concern for her safety scared him spitless. And now he questioned her sanity.

  See what happens when I let my guard down. Was there other side effects to the brain injury and memory loss? Did she pose a threat to herself? To his family? Deep down, he believed her not capable of hurting a fly. But...

  “We need to figure out what happens from here. The guests are scheduled to arrive tomorrow.” He lifted his hat and ran a hand through his sweaty hair. “I’m not comfortable letting you ride. I can’t take the risk of you having another flashback and hurting one of the guests, or yourself.”

  She swiped at her cheek. “I’ll pack my bags as soon as we get back to the barn.”

  The opening to the barn came into view and he stopped the equine, unhooked the line, and angled Ben in order for him to see her face. He reached over, lifted her chin, and scanned her haunted eyes.

  Damn. How did she get under his skin in the span of weeks? Words refused to form on his tongue. He wanted to wrap her in his arms and soothe her until she grew strong again, but the ranch and the safety of everyone came before his own desires.

  His thumb swiped away a tear from her cheek, and she pulled back.

  Nick let his hand fall to his side, offering her a tight smile while his gaze bore into hers. “It’s evident you love to ride. Your face lit up like I’ve never seen.”

  The woman next to him frowned and nodded as she reached down to pat T.J. on the side of his neck. When she straightened, he tugged on her reins and nudged his mount to a walk. Together, the horses strolled to the barn.

  “Go back to the cabin and take a long bath,” he instructed as he helped her dismount.

  Nick watched her defeated form as she wondered off. One step forward, three steps back. Wh
en the guests arrived, her responsibilities would increase. He needed her capable of handling the added pressure. Her job required her to see to the guests’ comfort, to be attentive, and to accompany him on the two-night retreat. He needed to be able to trust her...and he wasn’t sure he could.

  Where was his head? He couldn’t keep her on at the ranch.

  Yet, the idea of letting her go cut straight to his heart. Who’d help her through this?

  With a shake of his head, he removed the tack from each horse, placed the bridles on the hook, lugged the saddles off the equines’ backs, and released them into the pasture before heading to the main house.

  The notion of encountering any of his brothers made him hurry to the den. Sam sat at the big mahogany desk, the ranch expense books open in front of him. Unfortunately, his brother looked up as he stepped back.

  “Wait, just the person I wanted to talk to.”

  “What about?” Nick crossed the threshold and shut the door.

  “You tell me first?” His muscle-bound brother closed the ledger and scowled. “You look like hell.”

  “It’s Darcy.” Nick sat, then stood, then paced the length of the beige room. “Do you have her physical form?”

  Shuffling through the papers on the desk, Sam said, “Trent probably put it with her employee file.” He crossed to the wooden cabinet and rummaged through the content. “Here you go.”

  Nick scanned the pages and hit the table. Nowhere did it say anything about amnesia.

  The incident bugged him, and as hard as he tried to convince himself, not because she was an employee, but because he cared for her more with each passing day.

  Did these flashes happen often? He needed to talk to her, to see her, and reassure himself she was okay. First, he wanted to talk with someone who could give him more information. He noticed the signature and number on the bottom of the page. “I need to get a hold of her doctor.” For everyone’s safety...and my sanity.

  “What’s this about?”

  “I took her out on T.J. to show her the trails. We weren’t halfway to the camping area when she shot past me. I called to her, but she kept going.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. “God, Sam she came within five feet of going over the ravine before I stopped that horse.”