Baby for the Beast
Page 20
Knowing Jayce has been there and made it through what I have draws me to him more powerfully than any sexual attraction ever could--even if that part of my attraction to him is distractingly strong. I’d never admit as much to him, but submitting to Jayce was the most sublime, sensual experience of my life. Hardly an hour has gone by that I don’t think back to a few nights ago and the way he claimed me in that cold, blue room while people watched.
A knock at the door startles me from my thoughts. I do a quick check of my hair in the hallway mirror and make sure my clothes and makeup still look okay before opening the door.
Jayce waits for me in a dark suit that manages to make his already broad shoulders look even more masculine. His hair is combed back in a way that somehow looks messy but neat and clean. It only takes one look in his eyes to know that his surprise date isn’t going to be to a golf range.
“Evening,” he says with a smoldering grin.
God. It’s like I can forget how much of a presence he has in the time we’re apart. A few minutes or a few hours and I start convincing myself he’s not actually as consuming as I remember him being. I tell myself next time I’ll be more composed around him, or that I’ll have more self-control.
But whether he’s letting his guard down and telling me about his past or commanding me to obey his every sexual desire, Jayce has a hold on me. I can’t put my finger on why, but I feel it as surely as if there was a collar around my neck and a leash clutched firmly in his hand. Every moment I spend with him brings me closer to him--takes the slack out of the leash another few inches until I’m drawn so close I can feel the heat that practically burns from the surface of his skin.
Inch by inch, he’s making me his, and every hour that goes by chips away at my desire to stop him.
“Hi,” I say, my voice feeling thick and awkward.
He smoothly takes my arm and leads me into the hall, where he closes my door and waits for me to lock it. “I see they fixed it,” he says, nodding to the door he smashed down when he burst into stop Cade.
“Yeah,” I say. “Thank you, by the way. I would’ve gotten it handled if you hadn’t sent over that repair guy.”
“You break it, you buy it,” he says with a casual wave of his hand. “Besides, I liked having an excuse to do something nice for you. I think most women would’ve already dropped about two thousand hints for me to buy them something ridiculously expensive. You hardly seem to care.“
“We never had much,” I say as we wait for the elevator. “Growing up, I mean. My dad worked a factory job trying to make enough to support us on his own, but he probably spent half of it on booze, so… our Christmas tree and our pantry were always pretty barren.”
The elevator dings. Jayce guides me inside by the small of my back. Something in his touch is so reassuring. It’s protective--possessive, even--but it doesn’t make me feel claustrophobic like my brother’s over-protectiveness. It makes me feel safe and secure. Happy.
“I’d think that would make you even more interested in money,” he says.
“I guess it could’ve. But if I had learned to rely on money for happiness, I would’ve had a really hard time ever being happy. So maybe I just forced myself to stop thinking about it.”
“Have you been happy?” he asks. The tone of his voice is so gentle that his question touches me in a way I wouldn’t think just a few words could.
I feel my throat get tight and tears sting at my eyes, but I master my emotions with a brief struggle and force out the words. “Sometimes. Maybe.” It’s the truth. I could’ve said yes. I could’ve lied to him, but there was so much compassion in the way he asked, that I couldn’t bring myself to lie to him.
“That’s going to change,” he says firmly. “When you’re mine.”
His words send a trickle of heat through my body that pools in my stomach and makes my breath feel short. “You mean as a submissive?” I ask.
“I mean mine,” he says.
I wait for him to elaborate, but he apparently thinks he’s made his point and stands quietly until the elevator reaches the ground floor.
Jayce parks his car outside his club, looking over to me in a very serious--very sexy--way. “You had your turn taking me on the date you wanted. I played along nicely, didn’t I?”
“Yes…” I say slowly, not liking where this is going.
“Now it’s your turn to play nicely for me. Though I hope you’ll end up doing more than just playing,” he adds with a hint of a smirk. “I want you to be my submissive for the night. Not just in private. Not in some dark room where no one can see you. I want to show you off.”
I swallow. “In there?” I ask.
He nods. “And I want you to wear these while I do,” he says, his smirk widening as he lifts a pair of black panties from within the center console.
I frown at them, even though the idea of wearing the panties he wants me to wear already has heat building between my legs. “Why those?” I ask.
He waggles a finger at me. “No more questions, princess. If you’re going to learn how to truly please me as a submissive, it’s time you start learning how to properly behave. So you will put these panties on, and you’ll let me watch.”
“What?” I ask.
His expression darkens.
It only takes a look to make it perfectly clear to me that I’m not supposed to be asking questions or trying to get any kind of explanation. I’m just supposed to obey. There’s a freedom in the realization, a kind of reckless abandon in what he’s promising, and despite all my reservations, doubts, and fears from the past, I know I want to say yes.
I watch him with a defiant look as I shimmy out of my panties, careful to keep my dress from riding up and giving him too good of a view as I do. To my surprise, he holds out his hands like he expects me to hand him the panties. I do as he wants, which makes another rush of excited heat flood my body. God. He’s so confident. There’s not a hint of shame or embarrassment over wanting to take my used panties, and while the kinky request might creep me out coming from anyone else, the unapologetic confidence Jayce has makes it far from creepy. Somehow he makes it sexy, even.
I take the black panties and slide into them, noticing that Jayce doesn’t even try to hide the fact that he’s watching my every move.
“Perfect,” he says once I’ve got them on. “Now we can begin.”
He gets out of the car, opens my door, and helps me up. “There are a few rules you will need to follow, or you’ll find out why you’re wearing those panties.”
I frown in confusion, but he continues on, ignoring my unasked question.
“First, you will not make eye contact with another man so long as we are in the club. Second, you will not speak unless spoken to. Third, you will obey me without question, no matter what my request. Lastly, you give me the respect I deserve as your Dom and refer to me as Sir. Do you have any questions?”
Only a few thousand. “No. Sir,” I say, nearly forgetting to call him Sir already.
The club bustles with activity, as usual, but for the first time I feel like one of the sexy women I watch slink around with handsome men, watching from my side of the bar longingly at something I could never have. It feels good to be possessed by Jayce. He makes it painfully clear to anyone who looks our way that I’m his by holding his hand in the center of my back and subtly guiding me as he moves, making sure I stay perfectly in step with him.
I scan the crowd for Cade because his threatening text is still fresh in my mind. I don’t know if I ever really got to know the real Cade during the unfortunate time I spent dating him, but I do know that men like him don’t just walk away. Especially, not after what happened with Jayce in my apartment. Still, standing beside Jayce, I know I’m safe. At least from other men. I guess the jury is still out on whether I’m safe from him.
I have to do a very un-ladylike step as I try to discreetly spread my legs a little to adjust the panties Jayce has me wearing. They feel slightly odd near the front, like th
e material is thicker or they are heavier than usual, but my subtle move seems to relieve the discomfort.
It seems like Jayce knows every single person in the club. I lose track of how many people he introduces me to, and each time he specifically explains that I’m his submissive. I can’t say why, but no matter how many couples he tells I’m his submissive, I feel proud every time. Maybe it’s just the simple fact that Jayce is jaw-droppingly gorgeous, and I’d have to be out of my mind not to be proud to have him walking around practically bragging about having me.
As far as I can tell, I obey all of Jayce’s rules, until a man and two women stop us just as Jayce seems to be leading us to one of the back areas of the club.
“Jayce Carlyle in the flesh!” says the man in a booming voice.
I carefully avoid looking up to see his face. Even though Jayce doesn’t seem to be looking my way as he greets the trio, I feel like he’ll know if I break his rule somehow. All I can see is that the man is barrel-chested and almost bursts out of the expensive suit he wears. The women at his side are full of thick, beautiful curves, but just to be on the cautious side, I don’t look up and meet their eyes, either.
“Barry,” says Jayce in a neutral tone that tells me he isn’t a particularly big fan of this man. “It’s good to see you and your new…”
“These two are just run-of-the-mill submissives,” explains Barry, who gives both women a generous squeeze on their asses as if punctuating his point. “No slaves for me this season. Too complicated. Too many rules and too much commitment. Am I right?”
“I wouldn’t know,” Jayce says dryly.
Barry’s feet shift, and though I’m staring down at his shoes, I can tell he’s facing me now. “And who is this lovely minx at your side?”
“This is Miley, my submissive.”
“Ahhh, is she now? Does she speak?” he asks with a falsely playful tone.
“Not to you,” Jayce says. His tone has gone from neutral to cold.
Barry snaps his fingers, which draws my eyes instinctively up--where I accidentally look straight into his eyes. He has thick eyebrows and mediterranean features, but there’s something cocky and dirty in his expression I don’t like at all.
I look immediately back to the ground, but I see Jayce reach a hand into his pocket and I nearly gasp out loud when my pussy starts to vibrate. My eyes go wide and I move my hands half-way toward my crotch to suppress the vibrations before I realize how crazy I would look. I’m forced to keep my hands at my side and close my eyes, slowly piecing together what’s going on.
The panties…
He made me wear some kind of panties with a remote-controlled vibrator, and he must have the remote in his pocket. So my punishment is to have to endure the maddeningly good sensation in public--just a few inches away from people.. I put a hand to my mouth as carefully as I can, acting like I’m coughing to disguise the hitching of breath that drew their eyes.
I see Jayce grinning when no one else is looking, and I tell myself I need to find a way to pay him back for this particular cruel creativity if I ever get the chance.
“Are you alright, dear?” asks Barry, who steps forward and starts to reach for me.
Jayce steps between us, knocking Barry’s hand away so quickly I barely see it happen. “You’ll keep your eyes and your hands off my submissive if you want to remain welcome in my club. Am I making myself clear?”
Barry stutters out an apology, laughing awkwardly as he does. “Of course, of course, Mr. Carlyle. I was only trying to help, I do hope you’ll find it in your heart to…” he says, trailing off when Jayce leads me away from the man before he’s even finished apologizing.
It’s only once we start walking that Jayce finally turns off the vibrations. He leads me into one of the back rooms, pausing to look at me before we move in. “Each time you break one of my rules, I’ll leave it on longer. And don’t think I won’t make you cum in public, princess, because I’m just waiting for you to give me an excuse.”
I frown. “He wasn’t supposed to even look at me, but you’re okay with me cumming in front of strangers?”
Jayce pulls a small black object out of his pants and presses the button, setting the vibrations off. I clutch the hem of my dress from the intensity of the vibrations, which seem even more powerful than the first time.
The sensation takes the breath from my lungs, and Jayce moves me until my back is against the door frame and his body is inches from mine. “I’m answering you only because I choose to, princess. But you will pay the consequences for questioning me each and every time you dare to.”
I nod my head and close my eyes. My body is already shaking from the tremors of pleasure running through me like tendrils of flame. It’s not just the vibrations. It’s the exposure, the strangeness of being in plain sight of anyone who cared enough to look. All the elements blend together into a wonderful mix of euphoria tinged with the fear that I will start moaning and making a scene by having an orgasm in the middle of the crowded club for seemingly no reason.
“I can’t tolerate a man like him touching you or even thinking of you. But with a certain level of anonymity and detachment, I would enjoy taking you in public.”
I want to tell him how confusing that is and how little sense it makes, but if I’m being honest with myself I can understand to a certain degree. There is a strong vibe of creepiness coming from Barry. So I understand how him looking at me sexually or trying to touch me would seem more personal and intimate, even if it was only one-sided. But being taken by Jayce in front of others, like that first night in the room with the glass window… that felt different. It was just something thrilling and exciting in the background.He clicks the button, stopping the vibrations, but not immediately stepping away from me. “The intensity will keep going up,” he says. “So if you think you’ll be able to keep avoiding a scene when you misbehave, you may want to reconsider.”
He takes me by the small of my back again, finally leading me through the doorway into one of the areas set off from the main lobby. I still haven’t been inside any of these areas except the room with the stage I saw that first night Jayce took me, and the blue room.
I’m completely shocked when I realize we’re in a restaurant. I thought I had smelled food a couple of times before when I was behind the bar, but I always thought I imagined it because the smell was so faint. The idea that an entire kitchen and wait staff works here and I had no idea is more than a little surprising. Booths and tables are arranged much like they would be at a dinner show, except the show on the stage is seven bare-chested men and one completely naked woman.
I stop, looking toward the scene in a mixture of horror and fascination. She’s bound by ropes that suspend her from the ceiling and blindfolded. The skin of her breasts and ass is pink, and my guess it’s from the paddles some of the men are holding. “Jayce!” I whisper in alarm. “Is she okay?”
“I’m going to forgive the fact that you spoke out of turn, because your concern here is reasonable. But yes, she’s probably having the most sensually enlightening moment of her life right now. She volunteered for this, after all. In fact, the waitlist to be featured like this is so long she likely had to wait several weeks for her turn.”
“She wanted this?” I ask incredulously.
“This lifestyle has many, many things to offer for many different appetites, princess.”
“Does that kind of thing turn you on?” I ask, feeling a little nervous for the answer. I’m not about to judge him for his sexual fantasies, but at the same time, I’m desperately hoping he wouldn’t ever want me to do something like that, because I know I couldn’t. I wouldn’t want him to be okay with sharing me with that many men, either--or any men, for that matter.
“Personally? No,” he says. “I’ve never been particularly drawn to the extremes of BDSM. It has never been about extremes for me. Think of it like this: everyone has a line. For some, the line is drawn before their clothes even come off. For others, the line is sex wit
h a stranger,, or with ten strangers. The most important thing is to find your line and bring yourself to the absolute edge of it. You’ll never feel greater pleasure than when you’re straddling the line between too much and not enough. Go over the line, and your discomfort will taint your pleasure. Stay too far away from it and you’re cheating the experience.”
“Where’s your line?” I ask.
“That’s the thing,” he says with a grin. “One of the reasons I know you’re meant to be my submissive is that I feel something I’ve never felt before when I’m with you. I feel like my line is irrelevant now. My line is wherever yours is. Your limit is my own, and nothing will bring me greater pleasure than to help you find that edge again and again, because it will continually move as we explore.I want to be there with you as it does so we can find it together.”
I laugh a little awkwardly, not quite knowing what to say. “I’ve only known you a few days,” I say. “You’re talking like we’re going to be together forever.”
Even as I say them, my words sound harsh and colder than I intended. I know it’s a defense mechanism--a wall I’m putting up because I’m still afraid he’s going to hurt me if I let him in too close. I hate myself for it. Jayce has been nothing but good to me, and he’s the first guy who is actually making an effort to get to know the real me, yet I can’t seem to stop subconsciously pushing him away.
Somehow, Jayce manages to take my words in stride. He doesn’t even seem annoyed when he answers. “What would be the point of dating you if I didn’t plan on forever?”
I open my mouth to respond, but close it again before I say something stupid.
He puts both hands to my cheeks, rubbing my lips with his thumb in a longing sort of way that makes me tingle all over. “I know you have been through a lot, and I won’t even try to pretend I can understand what it was like. But I can promise you this much. Let me, and I’ll take care of you. I’ll treat you the way you deserve to be treated. I’ll care about you more than you ever imagined someone could. I swear it.”