"And then?" He leaned closer, but I lifted a hand to stop him. I wasn't into public displays of affection. We'd been dating a few weeks at most, and he tried every chance he got to show me off. It was like being a trophy wife to someone that didn’t wear your ring yet. I hated it.
"Steak or chicken?" I asked as I clenched my jaw. The man had no modesty, talking about our intimacy in front of a crowd of people.
"I'll make you dinner! And then you can have me for dessert!" A girl yelled from behind me.
"I'm good, Terra. I think the guys are going to grab a beer. I'll see you later." He turned and moved into the crowd of women, the smile on his face telling me that he hoped like hell I knew how easily he could and would leave me.
I turned and walked off the field, my insides hurting a little. I wanted to be promiscuous, to let my guard down and enjoy the carnality of life, but it seemed wrong to do with some jackass that wanted in my panties for a night. All of them were that way.
All but Danny.
"Right," I mumbled to myself and pulled out my keys. "You offered yourself to Danny a million times, and he denied you." I laughed bitterly, thinking back on my high school days. I'd been so deep in love with my brother's best friend that I couldn't have imagined life without Daniel McAdams in it. He was a good boy back then. "Oh, how things have changed."
I got in the car and closed the door before letting out a long sigh. I needed to tell Paul to fuck off. I wasn't going to be in a committed relationship if he wasn't. The guys on the Oakland team didn't just go out for beer and laughs. They went out and got shit-faced drunk and ended up in bed with someone. All of them that weren't wearing a ring, and some that were. Paul would be no different.
It was a wonder that anyone on the team respected me anymore. I needed to fix things, clean up my image. Or maybe I didn't. Maybe I just needed to let go of the hope that my first time would be with Danny and give in to Paul. He was hot as sin, and the times I'd hit my knees for him left me wanting to know how good it would feel to let him deep inside my body.
I let out a soft groan of frustration as I started the car. I was going to lose my mind if I sunk any farther down the dark hole of depravity I was headed toward. Grabbing my phone, I called my best friend, Niki to get my mind off things.
"Hey," she answered on the second ring, her voice filled with sleep.
"Oh, shit." I glanced at the clock. Ten in Cali, but it was one in the morning in New York. "I shouldn't have called this late."
"Ter. You can call at any time. You know that." The sound of her stretching loudly filled up my ear.
I winced. "You sound like a Big Foot when you do that."
"Come capture me and turn me in for a prize. Hopefully, someone big and strong will prod and poke at me."
We shared a giggle. Where I wasn't willing to sleep with anyone, she was the polar opposite. It was important to "take him for a test drive" before going any further. Even as far as a second date. I yearned to be a little more like Niki, but it just wasn't going to happen. Something about wanting Danny to own that first time left me crippled.
"How is Benji? Is he sleeping?"
"Yeah. Here in the bed with me. He'll be eight next month. He's getting too old for this." Her voice softened when she talked about her little man.
"Let him stay there until you finally decide to date someone worth giving a key too." I reached up and turned on the heater, a little chilled. How it was still in the fifties in the month of May was beyond me. Not that my hometown of Seattle was much better.
"Speaking of finding someone who's worthy of my snuggles," she paused, "what's going on with you and that hot pitcher you're dating? You letting him spend the night yet?"
Sex. Men. Money. We always ended up at one of those three things, almost like little old men talked about the weather and little old women talked about little old me.
"No." I reached up and ran my fingers through my hair. "I don't think he's the right guy for me, Niki. He's an asshole, and you know he's getting laid every time he goes to the bar with the guys."
"You're assuming that."
"Am I? Have you seen him?"
"Yeah, and I'm going to keep my thoughts to myself. We're best friends. No need to drool over your guy." She laughed. "When am I going to see you again?"
"I don't know." I pulled onto the freeway, suddenly wishing I hadn't called her. The sound of her voice took me back to a million good memories growing up. We'd all been a bunch of wild-asses back then, but life was free - fun.
"Alright, well, I'm going back to sleep. You're boring as shit right now."
I laughed. "I'll talk to you later. Give Benji a kiss for me?"
"I'll do it now. Night, Ter."
"Night." I dropped the call and tossed the phone into the seat next to me. My thoughts moved back to where they always did. High school. I hated how quickly I raced back there every chance I got. Eight years had passed, and yet somewhere in my mind, the what if's raged hard and heavy.
My breasts ached and nipples were tight, sensitive buds by the time I pulled up to my house on the bay. I'd gone over the night Danny and I'd been in his car, making out like two horny teenagers. It was right after his graduation events.
All I wanted was to fuck him there in that car, to feel him press his thick cock into my sloppy wetness and own me. I wanted to be his that night, and I hadn't shaken the thought since. Too bad we weren't even talking anymore.
"Fuck," I whimpered as I reached up and pressed the button to have the garage door close behind me. I knew better than to start thinking about him, but now that I had... all bets were off.
I reclined my seat a little and slipped my hand into my black slacks. A moan left me as I arched my hips up and pressed my fingers down my slick folds into my body. Everything disappeared and all that was left was him, hovering over the top of me.
"You want me to fuck you good and hard, don't you, baby?" He whispered against my lips as he gripped his cock in his hand, teasing me with the thick head of it.
"Please?" I reached out and grabbed his strong shoulders, pulling him toward me. I prayed he would mark me somehow as his own. I wanted his scent all over me, all over my bed. I wanted something to remember him by when he left again.
"You've always wanted it to be me, Terra." He leaned down and consumed me with a kiss that stole my breath.
"I need you so bad, Danny." I lifted my hips, trying to take control of our passion.
"Then you'll have me." He pressed his hips forward, forcing the thick head of his dick into my tight entrance and lighting me on fire.
I cried out in the silence of the car and bucked against my hand as lust raged through me. I'd never be turned on for Paul or anyone else. Every time I closed my eyes, it was him. Always him.
And it always had been.
Chapter 3
Daniel
I woke the next morning, feeling refreshed. I was glad I hadn't gone out to the bars, but instead picked up Lyndsay from my mom and dad. We'd had a good snuggle and the little turkey fell asleep in the bed next to me. Good damn thing the maid came during the day and washed the sheets. We'd have been camping out on the couch otherwise.
Turning carefully as the sunlight filtered through my bedroom window, I propped up on my elbow and reached out to brush a wayward blond hair behind her ear. My heart ached deep in my chest that she'd grow up without her momma. My sister's little girl was now mine, and she’d be raised as my own as best I could. Being a single father for the last few years had forced me to grow the fuck up in certain areas, at least all areas other than women. It's not like I could imagine a woman coming into my life and helping me raise Lyndsay.
"That tickles!" Her little voice surprised me. Big blue eyes looked up at me with an innocence in them that I knew I'd do anything to protect.
"What tickles?" I lifted an eyebrow and reached over to tickle the side of her neck. "This?" Her giggles filled up the air as I reached for her.
"No, Daddy! No!" She swatted at m
e and rolled off the bed, hitting the floor.
"Hey. You okay?" I moved quickly, ready to scoop her up.
She smiled up at me from the floor. "Yes!" Bounding up, she tickled my neck and ran off toward the living room, her blond curls flying behind her.
"You tricker!" I yelled playfully from the bedroom and got up. I ran my fingers through my hair and walked down the hallway to the kitchen. It was hard to believe Jannie had been gone for five years. Seemed like yesterday she was giving me shit about finding a good woman in my life. Too bad she never found a good man.
"What are you thinking about?" Lyndsay tilted her head to the side as she sat up at the breakfast bar, her little chin propped up in her hands. "You look worried."
"Nope. Just trying to wake up. I went to sleep with a princess next to me and woke up to a frog." I pinched the tip of her nose softly. "What happened?"
"A frog! Not me, Daddy." She pulled back, shaking her head.
"No. You're right. You're much too pretty for that." I walked to the fridge. "What does my girl want for breakfast this morning?"
"Pancakes, and eggs and maybe some bacon. Oh! And some sausage. And that ham we like so much, daddy. The really salty one."
I laughed and glanced over at her. "Cinnamon rolls it is."
She huffed and rolled her eyes. "Fine. I'm going to watch cartoons. Are we going to Mimi's again today?"
"Yeah, baby. You know it's baseball season right now. I have to be there when they tell me to."
"I hate baseball season." She walked toward the living room with her shoulders rolled in. I needed to find a damn day off to spend with her. The cute little thing had no clue that I was her uncle instead of her father. She didn't need to know. That was the decision mom, dad and I made the day we buried my sister. It was better this way, and I was old enough and wealthy enough to take Lyndsay.
"Not that I could do it without you," I mumbled to the empty air around me. My mom and dad had been more than helpful, and between the three of us, Lyndsay was growing up to be a bright, happy, healthy little girl.
"Dad!" she yelled from the living room.
"Yeah?" I pressed the button on the stove and walked to the edge of the kitchen.
"When are you going to bring home someone that can do my hair right?"
I put my hand on my hip and gave her a funny look. "Are you saying I'm not a good beauty shop lady or something?"
She giggle-snorted, the sound of it warming my soul. "Dad. We need a girl around here."
"Well, we have one." I pointed to her. "You!"
"Ugh. Never mind." She turned back to the TV and pulled her legs up to her chest before wrapping her tiny arms around them.
It was a conversation that came up day after day between us, and where I wanted to tell her how hard it was to bring a woman around, it was pointless. She was a little girl, and to her... she needed a mommy, and I needed a wife.
Terra swept across my mind again, but I dismissed the idea of falling in love and living the life of my dreams.
It was a fairy tale, a romance novel, a sitcom for someone else to enjoy.
It had little to nothing to do with me.
"Danny. There you are." Martin glanced up from the table he and Lance sat at as I walked up.
"Sorry, I'm late. Lyndsay wasn't in a giving mood this morning." I pulled out my chair and sat down next to my boss and his son, my best friend.
"She doing okay?" Concern moved across Lance's face.
"Yeah, buddy." I reached out and squeezed his shoulder. "Man. It's good to see you. How's New York treating you?"
"Great." He smiled and glanced over toward his dad. "The old man here is still trying to get me back over here in Washington, but he's going to have to do something more than offering a baseball team."
I chuckled. There was no way in hell Lance would take the baseball team. He hadn't played sports a day in his life that wasn't forced by his old man. His sister, my Terra on the other hand...
"I've been trying for years, Danny, but you know how this pansy ass boy is." Martin winked and picked up his menu. "Naw. I'm proud of him and he knows it. He's been working day and night for his damn medical degree and he's the best Surgeon St. Mark's has ever seen."
"Hey, while we're taking turns kissing each other's asses..." I laughed as they both gave me a look. It was nice to feel like I was part of the family. I'd been haunting their doorstep since Lance and I were in third grade.
"I've actually put in for a transfer." Lance leaned back and gave me a cocky smile. "I want to move into medical research. I have some ideas."
"On what?" I paused as the waitress came over. Her dark red hair reminded me of Terra, but her model thin body shut down my bedroom thoughts almost immediately.
"Hi, guys. What can I get for you?" She kept her eyes on me as a smile played at the side of her mouth.
"Martin. Lance. You guys go ahead." I turned my attention back to my menu, ignoring her. When it was my turn, I ordered breakfast instead of lunch, getting all the things Lyndsay had mentioned earlier that morning. She had me hungry for them since leaving the house. Knowing my mother, Lyndsay would have her making everything she wanted to eat and then some. My mom loved the kitchen.
"So, tell me how things are going." Lance turned his attention to me. "Your shoulder doing okay?"
I rolled my right shoulder and rubbed it. "Yeah. It's much better. I just tweaked something, but I'll be good by the time I get to pitch."
"Well, if you're not, just say something, Danny. I don't want them to put you out there and we accidentally ruin your shoulder." Martin gave me a stern look.
"No, Sir. I'll not let that happen." I reached for my water. Everyone was so damn worried about my joints giving out, but I was good. There were better things to worry about. "So, I heard on the news the other day that you've changed your will to leave the team to Terra. That just bullshit stories the media are having fun with, or-"
"It's all true." Martin leaned back and glanced at Lance. "This guy doesn't want them, and if we're all being honest, Terra is the best pick. She's done an incredible job down in Oakland. It's crazy to think they let a woman take over as GM, but they did."
"And she's rocking it." Lance glanced at me. That familiar feeling deep inside of me woke up. I yearned to see her again, to reach out and touch her soft skin, to hear her say my name. "Oh, Lord. There he goes again, Dad."
"What?" I came to and glanced at Lance and back at Martin. "There he goes what?"
Martin laughed. "Lance was telling me this morning back at the house that you still have a crush on my princess." He tilted his head to the side as his expression tightened.
I felt like I was eighteen again, having to ask Martin if I could take his fifteen-year-old daughter to prom with me. It hadn't gone well back then, and it looked like it wouldn't be much different now.
"I'm thirty years old, guys. That was twelve years ago. Terra is like family to me now." I shrugged and moved back, grateful as fuck that the food had arrived.
"Whatever, Danny. I know you better than that." Lance pulled his napkin into his lap and smiled at me. "She's not got a ring on her finger."
"Shame." I shrugged and picked up my fork. "She should. She's a good woman."
"The best." Her father agreed and took a drink of his coffee. "Have you heard anything about the HGH issues that the Braves are having? There's a big scandal over in Atlanta right now. I think we need to request that the league test more often."
I picked up a piece of bacon, rolled it up and shoved it in my mouth. I was grateful to talk about anything other than Terra. I was a horrible liar and would have buckled in front of them if they kept poking me about her. I wasn't over her. Fuck, I'd never be. She was the one that got away, the one I dreamt about every night and still had some sad inkling of hope over. She was mine in some other place, some other time. The past.
"I think that's a great idea." Lance nodded before taking a big bite of toast. "The last thing you want is the publicity that comes
with the league finding out that you have someone on the team beefing up on steroids."
"So maybe you start doing team tests yourself, Martin." I suggested. "Might be smart to get ahead of the game rather than ask the league to start getting after it. You end up in the same place you started then, with them finding out and you losing players."
"And getting shitty media coverage," Lance offered.
I smiled. "What's your deal with the media? Something happen or is this just one of your well-hidden fears?"
He shook his head. "Neither. I just think they're full of shit."
"Agreed." Martin glanced up. "I like it. I'll talk with Joe and Alan about it and get their thoughts."
"Damn, Dad. You still have Joe coaching? What's he, like, two hundred now?"
"He's my age, you ass." Martin smirked. "So is Alan. I like having my head coach and GM as good friends from my past. It lets me sleep at night knowing my assets are being protected."
I chuckled and took another bite of my sausage as my thoughts moved back to Terra. "Have you talked to Terra about taking over the team, Martin?"
"No." He shook his head and smiled. "Nothing to worry about just yet, Danny. I'm going to outlive you all."
"Truth." Lance glanced my way and lifted his hand for a high-five. I denied him for fun.
We'd been saying his father would be running circles around us when we were old men, and so far, we were right.
Chapter 4
Terra
"You work too hard." One of the coaches for the team in Oakland walked up and sat down in front of my desk.
"Well, I am the GM. It's part of the job." I leaned back and crossed my hands over my stomach as he watched me.
"You think you'll ever get tired of the sexist bullshit you have to put up with?" He crossed his arms over his thick chest.
"No. I think that's also part of the job." I shrugged. "My father taught me to be tough, so, I am."
We Belong Together: A BBW Second Chance Romance Page 2
