My Salvation: A Contemporary Reverse Harem Romance

by Stella Brie

“To finish your tour. So tell me, where haven’t you been?”

  Not sure whether to take him seriously, I give him a list of the places Lev showed me.

  Thinking, he tells me I’ve seen nearly all of the house except for Shaw and Thayer’s quarters and, of course, his rooms. Guiding my back, we cross over to the stairs and head up to the second floor. I might be nervous now. The only thing Lowell and I have done is kiss. Although that tango was damn sexual.

  At the top of the stairs, he motions to the left and tells me those are Thayer’s rooms. Turning right, he strides to the first door and opens it. It’s an office, filled with windows and shelves of books. By the window sits a massive desk, filled with books and papers. I’m almost in shock at the clutter. This doesn’t even feel like Lowell.

  “I know, it’s a mess. For some reason, I can’t work when everything is orderly. It’s like I need a messy environment to see all the different threads to a story.” His cheeks are red as he quickly pulls the door shut.

  Looking up at him, I laugh. “I’m surprised you let me in on your dirty little secret.”

  “The better to prepare you for more surprises.”

  My eyebrows rise as I wonder what else is coming.

  We walk to the next door, and he opens it to a bedroom. Everything is in shades of dark green, with black accents. This room feels like Lowell. It’s super orderly, with a recliner that has a book lying on it. His couch is more formal looking than Lev’s slouchy couch. The bed is intriguing, though, as I didn’t expect Lowell to have a four-poster bed.

  Looking closer, I notice strange black loops hanging from the posts. Walking over, I lay my cardigan on the bed and reach out to grab the loops. They’re made of a soft black cord.

  As Lowell comes to stand close to me, I ask, “What in the world?”

  He reaches out and shows me how the loops slide up and down and lengthen and shorten. Putting my hand in one loop, he also shows me how they tighten. Slowly, I begin to comprehend the purpose of the loops. Flushing, I turn to face him, my one hand in the loop and my other at my side, waiting for him to tell me more.

  Watching my face, he reads the desire to know more and reaches out to grasp my other hand. “Sometimes, it’s better to show than tell.”

  Turning me around, he reaches for my looped hand and pulls it towards the top of the post. Once my arm is stretched out above me, he lifts my other hand over my head and pulls it through a loop beside the first one, then tightens it, too. When he turns me back around to face him, the loops hold my hands above my head, tied to the post. And just like that, the fire Lev started earlier comes roaring back to life.

  Trailing his hands down my body, Lowell leans in and gives me one of his trademark controlled kisses. Brushing my hair back from my face, he suddenly grips it tightly in his hand and pulls my head back to deepen the kiss. He’s so tall, I have to stretch up on my toes to meet his mouth, which brings my stomach into contact with his cock. Moaning, I shift my hips, trying to press up against him. He pulls his body back until I subside, then lightly presses back into me. Rubbing his cock against my stomach, I can feel how hard he is beneath his clothes. I move my body to get closer, and he presses me back against the bedpost.

  “Stay there, and don’t move unless I tell you. If anything gets to be too much, just say, ‘Tango.’”

  He waits until I give him my agreement and, simultaneously, my willingness to let him do whatever he wants. Sighing, as if a huge weight is off his shoulders, he goes back to kissing me. He uses his grip in my hair to maneuver my mouth the way he wants it. Sometimes he pulls it back so he can deepen the kiss. Sometimes he pulls it to the side so he can skim his lips down my neck. As he runs across the hot spot on my neck, I shiver, and he pulls back to watch me as he lightly strokes the spot with his finger. My body pulls away from the post in an involuntary arch. In response, he bites down on my shoulder as punishment for disobeying his orders, just hard enough that an arrow of desire shoots straight down to my clit.

  Fuck me! I’ve never had anyone bite me and didn’t know it would feel so good.

  Soothing the bite with his tongue, he grips my hips and pushes my body back against the post. Raising his hands, he pulls up my tank top and slips it over my head, but he can’t take it off due to the restraints. He leaves it behind my neck, using it as another restraint on my body. His fingers skim over the bullet wounds. He leans down and bites softly around them, turning them from something to hide into pinpoints of desire and need.

  Unclasping my bra, his fingers map my breasts, getting to know their shape before cupping them to feel their weight in his hands. Pinching the nipples, he watches my body move restlessly. I don’t make a sound, though. He takes a firmer grip, twisting and pinching. A moan slips past my lips.

  “Harder, please,” breathlessly, I beg him. He twists harder. It’s not enough. “Harder, Lowell.” My pleas are demanding now.

  Lowell steps away for a second and comes back with gold clamps in his hand. I stare up at him, wondering what he is doing.

  “These are clamps,” he explains as he slides one end on to each nipple. “I’ll tighten them, and you tell me when it’s enough. OK?”

  Oh, shit. Am I ready for this? I don’t know, but I need it.

  “Yes,” I whisper, knowing he needs to hear my words.

  He clamps them on my nipples, pinching them tighter and tighter in the ring. It’s finally enough for me, tight points of pain and pleasure. His hands reach out to move my breasts from side to side. The clamps feel like they are contracting tighter for a second.

  Fuck, yes.

  I inhale sharply. The pain and pleasure drive straight down to my pussy like an arrow.

  Moaning, I beg Lowell, “Please. Please help me come.”

  “Do you want me to use my fingers or my tongue?”

  Staring at him, I’m almost lost at the question. Honestly, I want to say I don’t care, but I’ve been thinking of those long fingers in my pussy ever since I first saw his hands.

  “Fingers.”

  “Really?” He’s surprised by my choice. “Why?”

  Embarrassed, I try to look away, but he reaches out and grabs my chin until I look up at him. “Your fingers are so long. I’ve been wondering what they would feel like curled up inside of me.” My face burns as I blush.

  His hand tightens in my hair, and he reaches down to kiss me hard, a little less controlled than usual, as if admitting my need was what he needed to hear.

  Unbuttoning and unzipping my jeans, he pulls them off. I’m almost entirely naked in front of Lowell now. Kneeling down, he presses his face against my pussy, inhaling deeply, before taking off my underwear.

  Thank God I’ve had a wax recently.

  I look down at him as he stares at my pussy. His hands clench on my thighs as he lightly blows across my clit. My hips thrust towards him, wanting more. Instead, he takes a deep breath, stands up, and trails his fingers down. Sliding through the slit, he groans.

  “You’re already so wet from earlier. Fuck. What I wouldn’t give to taste you. Next time, I won’t ask.” His fingers explore my clit, circling and stroking until I’m begging him to let me come. He stops. “Tell me.”

  What? I need this, and he fucking stops?

  While I need the words and sounds for reassurance, he needs the authority over me. Controlling bastard. Taking a deep breath, I let it go, because I know he will not continue if I don’t ask for it.

  “Fuck me with your fingers, please, Lowell. Stroke my clit, slide them into my pussy, curl them up, and fuck me. In and out.” Holding my breath, I wait for him to move, my body trembling with the need to come.

  After a heartbeat or three hundred, he gives me a wicked smile, plunging his fingers into my pussy. His other hand grips my hair and holds my head back so he can watch me as I come. His green eyes burn as he listens to the sounds coming from my throat.

  Moaning, I tell him, “I’m so close...now, Lowell...please.” His thumb circles my clit, while his ot
her fingers curl up inside me and stroke me. “Fuck, yes.”

  I come hard, jerking up against him, my body clenching his fingers tight. Waves roll over my body, my knees give out, and Lowell reaches out to pull me up and hold me as I ride my orgasm. As my tremors subside, he pulls out his fingers, and I shudder at the loss.

  Breathing heavily, I lean against Lowell. Looking down is a shock. I’m spent and almost entirely naked, and this man is hard as a rock and fully dressed. He stands me up against the post again, brushes the hair out of my eyes, then leans down to give me a hard, almost punishing kiss in its intensity. I can feel his cock against my stomach. Anticipation curls in my stomach at what comes next.

  Of course, the phone buzzes, interrupting the moment.

  “Fuck,” Lowell quietly swears. Breathing heavily, he adjusts his cock and takes a moment to just to hold me. “I guess this will have to wait.”

  Reaching up, he loosens the loops and pulls out my hands. He rubs my wrists and hands, then down my arms, briskly, getting the blood flowing freely again.

  Looking down, he slides off the nipple clamps. As I watch him pull them off, I can’t help gasping as the blood returns to the spot, making my nipples tingle hard as the pain nips at me. My entire body turns red as I think about the clamps and how the pain turned me on. It didn’t seem to faze Lowell, though, as if he knew what I would need the most.

  Lowell drops to his knees again to pull up my undies and jeans. Before he pulls them all the way up, he reaches out to pull me apart so he can see my swollen, wet lips. Stroking lightly across them, he looks at me as he brings his finger up to taste me.

  “Delicious, my dear.” He finishes pulling up my clothes before standing.

  Fuck, this man.

  Shaking my head, I can’t even finish the thought, I’m so turned on by him. I make myself busy looking for my bra. Pulling it on, I reach up to pull my tank top back over my head. Shit, it’s full of wrinkles now. Even though I’m hot, I reach out to grab the cardigan and pull it on, too. I’m sure my hair is a mess, and I need some cool water for my face. Flustered, I look around for the bathroom. Spotting a door in the corner, I move towards it.

  A hand reaches out and grabs my wrist. Startled, I look up into Lowell’s face. He reads the desperation in my face. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

  He releases me and runs his hand through his hair. “Is it me? Or did I push you too hard?” He stares at me, waiting for an answer.

  Swallowing, I close my eyes for a second. “It’s not you. It’s a...lot of things. I’m embarrassed that we haven’t known each other that long, and yet I let you do things to me I’ve never let someone else do. I am dating two men, and I let both of you touch me today. I’ve gone several years without feeling, and now I feel too much.” I stop. Shrugging, I quietly reassure him. “I like you. A lot. I’ve never been with a man as dominating as you. It’s exhilarating. And overwhelming.”

  I shrug and turn around to head to the bathroom. Washing my face and rinsing off a bit, I comb my fingers through my hair. Taking a deep breath, I open the door. Lowell is leaning against the wall in front of me.

  “I like you a lot, too,” he tells me quietly. Holding his hand out, he clasps his hand in mine and pulls me to him. Tucking my hair behind my ear, he strokes along my jaw. “Regarding the dominance, we will just take it slow and figure out what you like and don’t like. You have complete control and the ability to decide how we move forward. I will push you beyond your current limits to find what you really need, but if you ever want to stop, it only takes one word.” Leaning down, he gives me a soft kiss. “Now, let’s go eat.”

  Dinner is delicious. Lev fixed the famous spaghetti, I loved so much. He frowned at the lines around my wrist from the loop but said nothing. He raised an eyebrow towards Lowell, and they apparently worked it out silently.

  Shaw observed everything quietly until the end of the meal, when the talk turned to the horses that were ready for breeding.

  “Your horses are beautiful. How many do you have here?” I ask.

  Shaw answers me quietly, “We have about thirty horses altogether, but most of them are working horses for the ranch. For the breeding program, we have nine horses. Two studs and seven mares. Do you ride?”

  Wistfully, I shake my head. “I never had enough time or opportunity when I was younger. I filled most of my time with all things STEM.”

  He sits quietly for a moment. “If you would like to come out on Sundays, I’d be happy to give you lessons.”

  His offer is sincere, some of his earlier animosity having seemingly dissipated. “I’d love to learn how to ride. Thank you.” I smile at him before looking over to Lev, whose head is tilted as he looks at Shaw.

  Standing, Shaw tells me he will see me next Sunday before he excuses himself.

  Since Lev picked me up, Lowell decides to take me home. Thanking Lev for the dinner, we drive back to the apartment. Lowell gives me one deep kiss, then leaves me alone with my thoughts. I have a lot to think about after this first visit to the ranch.

  CHAPTER 15

  SHAW

  “What the hell was that about?” Lev strides angrily into the room. “First you are an ass to her, and then you are offering to give her riding lessons?”

  Frustrated, I run my hands through my hair to think before I turn to face him. “I’m worried. Both you and Lev seem like you are serious about her, and you just met her. I don’t want this to turn into another situation that blows up in our face. We have enough to handle right now with Thayer out. She is managing his practice and doing well. If something happens, we have to start all over with finding another doctor.”

  “Bullshit. You’re scared to live again. Nessa left us three years ago. She has another life. When she left, every one of us threw ourselves into work, and it’s paid off, we’re all doing great. But I need more than work in my life. Lowell does, too.” He stands, arms crossed, scowling at me.

  “You know she is leaving after this assignment, right? What then?” Turning my back on him, I look out the window. “I understand you need more, but I think her temporary status is exactly the reason we...you...should find someone else. I can’t stand the thought of another woman hurting our entire family.”

  Lev shakes his head in denial. “She’s worth it. There’s something about her I can’t ignore.”

  “I agree,” Lowell adds as he strides into the room, and into the conversation. “She brings something I’ve been missing. Before her, I felt like I was living in a vacuum with few emotions. Now, thoughts of her consume me whenever she is away. When I’m around her, I feel more.”

  Turning back around, I closely assess their determination. The fierce expressions on their faces tells me they are not interested in my opinion. Throwing my hands up in the air, I give in for now.

  “I agreed to give her riding lessons so I could get to know her better,” I explain. “Why don’t we start with friendship and see what happens? It’s all I can do.”

  Lev agrees and walks out to clean the kitchen. Lowell dips his chin and strolls out as well.

  Kate’s a surprise, and Lev’s right, there is something about her that draws you in and makes you want to stand in her space for a while. It has been so long since I felt even a spark for anyone. While Lowell and Lev often date, Thayer and I avoid women like the plague. Neither of us is interested in feeling that pain again.

  Over the last three years, I had spent so many mornings, getting up before the sun, just so I wouldn’t lie in bed and think about Nessa and what could have been. Do I want someone in my life? Sure. Sharing one woman, though? It almost killed all us when Nessa left. To risk another group fall-out? I am not sure we would survive.

  Vanessa - or Nessa, as we called her - was in the Army with us. Although not a part of our elite unit, she managed intelligence for our branch of covert operations, so we were often together. One thing led to another, and we all fell for her. We shared everything together. Work, home, and each other. When we decided
to get out of the Army a few years ago, she took a job in Washington, D.C., instead of coming to Montana with us. It just about killed us all. We offered to follow her to D.C., but she said she wanted to find one man to marry and have kids. It would be more acceptable to her career and future promotions if she had a single husband, not four lovers.

  We had all known she was ambitious, but until then we didn’t realize we were only a temporary situation for her. Given the circumstances, we moved to Montana, and she moved to D.C. We heard last year she had married and had a baby, and while we were happy she found what she needed, it was like sticking a knife in an already festering wound. While most of us threw ourselves into work, Thayer started pushing his physical limits more and more with adrenaline-fueled activities, which is how he landed in the hospital. Falling for another temporary woman would kill our family.

  CHAPTER 16

  KATE

  The next week flew by, filled with patients and a lot of texting with Lev and Lowell, but no dates. They were both busy but would see me on Sunday.

  Saturday night, Sarah dragged me out to a country line dance bar for a girls’ night. It had been a hilarious night filled with some dancing, a whole lot of stumbling, and copious amounts of alcohol. I finally got the hang of a few of the dances, but the more alcohol I drank, the less I remembered.

  Groaning, I tapped the phone to turn off the alarm. Bleary-eyed, I stumbled into the shower to find my humanity. Standing under the hot spray, I contemplated calling off the riding lessons, but I was too damn curious about Shaw to throw away this chance. Who knew if he would even offer again? Nope, I needed to suck it up and pull myself together. Slouching, I let my head fall against the cool tile.

  OK, maybe just ten more minutes, and then I’ll get going.

  About twenty minutes later, I finally make it out of the bathroom. My hair’s dry enough for a ponytail, and that would have to do today. I can’t handle much more. I have no idea what I should wear, so I grab jeans, a long-sleeve T-shirt, and my motorcycle boots. I figure they could at least get me through the muck.