Break Away (The Baltimore Banners Book 5)

by Lisa B. Kamps

  Monica pulled her shoulders closer together and looked down, her body stiff, her posture both defeated and defensive. Anger rushed through Emily as she recognized the body language. Anger, disbelief...and disappointment. "Monica. Tell me you didn't."

  Her sister was quiet for several minutes. Too quiet. Emily sighed, not bothering to hide her frustration. It was the wrong thing to do. Monica's head flew up, her dark brows lowered over eyes, her anger clear.

  "Don't you dare judge me!"

  "Monica, I'm not—"

  "You don't know what it's like, you don't know what I go through. Always making excuses to Taylor, dying inside because her father doesn't care. Do you have any idea—"

  "Monica. Stop. I do know. I understand, okay?" Emily kept her voice quiet, soothing, doing her best to calm Monica's emotions. Her sister sat across from her, her chest heaving with each angry breath, and Emily waited. Would she calm down? Or would she lose herself in one of her many rants over the worthlessness of her ex?

  Monica's body finally sagged, the expression of defeat in her posture and on her face striking something deep inside Emily. No matter what her sister thought, Emily did understand. All too well.

  "I'm sorry. I just...I really thought he was going to come through this weekend, or else I would have never told Taylor. He actually sounded excited. Said he was looking forward to her spending the weekend with him, looking forward to her tournament."

  Emily closed her eyes, keen disappointment sweeping through her. Not just the disappointment coming from Monica, but her own as well, a deep disappointment for how Taylor would take the news. To be let down by her father. Again.

  Emily took a deep breath and tried to force a smile she didn't feel to her face. "Then we'll just have to go overboard for Thanksgiving dinner, won't we? And cheer really loud for Taylor when she's playing."

  It was a ridiculous thing to say. Emily knew that before the words even left her mouth, but she still had to try. For her niece. But Monica's face paled again and she looked away, chewing her lower lip so hard Emily was surprised she didn't draw blood. Foreboding swept through her, hard and fast as she watched her sister.

  "What? What is it Monica?"

  "I'm working the entire weekend. I picked up some overtime and switched shifts with one of the girls. I thought..." Monica's voice drifted off on a heavy sigh. She shrugged and kept her face turned away as she continued. "I figured I may as well get some extra money since Taylor wouldn't be here."

  "What? Monica, why? Can't you change the shifts back? Cancel the overtime or work something out?"

  "No, I can't. It's too late for that."

  Emily bit back a curse. Why would Monica do something like that when she knew Jon would cancel? He always did. Always. But for whatever reason, Monica hadn't considered what would happen, what always happened. Which meant Emily would be left patching up Taylor's disappointment.

  Monica smoothed back her hair then stood, not even looking at her. "I need to go."

  And before Emily could say anything, Monica was gone, the sound of her steps hurried as she made her way upstairs. Emily cursed beneath her breath, her mind already formulating excuses to give to Taylor.

  It didn't matter what excuse she gave her niece. Taylor was going to be disappointed. And hurt. By both her parents.

  Emily fisted one hand and slammed the top of her desk, wishing with all her heart she could do something to take away the pain her niece would no doubt feel at the news.

  Chapter Thirteen

  "Right there. That's what I'm talking about."

  "Oh yeah, someone's going to be scoring tonight."

  "Definitely. Who do you think it's going to be?"

  "Who else? Look, she's heading this way."

  An elbow jammed into JP's side, jerking him from his deep contemplation of the beer in front of him. Pale liquid sloshed over the rim of the chilled glass, spilling on his hand. He tossed Mat an impatient look then reached across the bar for some napkins. He finished wiping the spill then tossed the ball of wet napkins across the bar, hitting Randy square in the chest before a hand closed over his arm.

  He jumped at the touch then looked down, only a little surprised to see the feminine hand wrapped around his bare forearm. The fingers were long and tapered, tipped by long lacquered nails in a brightly painted design. The hand was pale against the darker skin of his arm, the skin smooth and soft. His eyes traveled across the hand, to the sparkling diamond bracelet wrapped around a delicate wrist, up a bare arm, finally stopping at the owner's face.

  She was a beautiful woman, with finely sculpted cheekbones and a full pouty mouth. Brown eyes gazed at him from beneath long dark lashes, her interest clear as she sidled even closer, the lush fullness of her soft breasts pushing against his arm.

  She smiled and tilted her head to the side, her thick auburn hair falling across her shoulder with the move. Her smile widened as heat flashed in her eyes and she leaned even closer.

  "I was wondering if I could buy you a drink." It was a statement, not a question. Bold and forward, leaving no room for doubt. Just the way JP liked it.

  Usually. Tonight, it did nothing more than annoy him.

  "Score!" Mat's voice was pitched low enough so that only JP and his teammates could hear it. Or maybe not, if the woman's growing smile was any indication. JP swung out with his left foot, connecting with Mat's shin with perfect aim. He ignored his friend's small grunt and turned back to the woman with a soft smile.

  "Thank you but non. I already have one."

  The woman's smile faltered for a brief second before returning. A little brighter, a little more forced. She squeezed his arm, the tips of her nails digging into his flesh for a brief second before letting go. Her eyes drifted past him, raking over the trio beside him, then she finally shrugged and walked away.

  JP followed her with his eyes, his gaze dropping to the shapely ass beneath the tight skirt, to the long legs made even longer by the ridiculously high heels on her small feet. He shook his head and turned back to the bar, once more focusing on the beer in front of him.

  There was no shortage of women here tonight, just like every night. The Maypole, a refined sports bar and restaurant geared towards women, had been hugely successful since it opened over a year ago. Owned by a group of women that included both Randy Michaels' sister and girlfriend, the place had quickly become a hangout for quite a few of the single players on the team.

  And it wasn't just because the food was great.

  "What the fuck is wrong with you, Larocque?"

  "Seriously. Dude. You so could have had that."

  "Fuck that, my turn." Justin Tome turned to Randy. "Get me one of whatever she's drinking. I'm going to go introduce myself."

  JP watched as Randy stepped back, his dark gaze darting over the wide collection of bottles behind the bar. Randy shrugged then threw his hands in the air. "I don't know what she's drinking."

  "How can you not know what she's drinking?"

  "Because I'm not the fucking bartender, that's why."

  "Then why are you even back there?"

  JP watched the verbal volley, a small smile tilting the corner of his mouth as Randy shrugged again, his expression betraying how lost he was back there.

  "I'm back here because Darren took a quick break and couldn't leave the bar alone."

  "Whatever. Pour me a glass of white wine, then. Women always drink white wine."

  "No they don't."

  "Yeah they do. Look around, man. Are you blind?"

  JP took a long swallow of beer to hide his smile, then tuned out his teammates’ bickering as Randy fumbled with a glass and a bottle of wine. He turned on the stool, caught Mat's questioning gaze, then quickly looked away. But not quick enough, because Mat stepped a little closer, leaning in on the pretense of reaching for his own beer.

  "You going to tell me what's going on?"

  "Nothing is going on."

  "Really? Because a month ago you would have been all over that." Mat
nodded his head in the direction at something just over JP's right shoulder. He didn't have to turn around to know he was looking at the woman who had just walked away. Just like he didn't have to turn around to know that Justin was now heading over there, a glass of white wine in his hand as an offering.

  JP shrugged and took a sip of beer. "Wasn't interested."

  "You? Not interested? Since when aren't you interested? If it's breathing and has tits, you're usually interested."

  Heat crept up his face and he shifted on the stool, suddenly uncomfortable. Because Mat only spoke the truth. Or at least, the truth as he saw it. And he was partially right. Not too long ago, JP would have gladly accepted the woman's offer of a drink. And so much more.

  But not now. Not for eight months. No, longer than that. Only his teammates were just now realizing it, just now starting to comment on it. JP had no intention of explaining anything to his friends, no matter what they thought.

  He certainly had no attention of explaining about Emily. How could he explain something he didn't fully understand himself?

  There was only one woman he was interested in right now.

  A woman who apparently wanted nothing to do with him.

  Because I didn't think I'd still want to. Not with you.

  Emily's words from the other day came back to him, just as fresh and biting as when she had first said them. And just what the hell was that supposed to mean anyway?

  He had been torturing himself with that same question over and over again, and he still had no answer. He wasn't sure he wanted one.

  Mat muttered something under his breath, his tone impatient. Then he grabbed his beer and shoved away from the bar, heading over to the table where the other guys had disappeared to. JP looked over his shoulder, saw the women greet his teammates with bright smiles and eager faces. He shook his head and turned back to his beer, draining what was left of it in one long swallow.

  "Sucks, doesn't it?"

  JP looked up, surprised to see Randy leaning on one elbow, studying him. "What sucks?"

  "When you realize you've been running in the wrong direction all this time."

  "No idea what you're talking about, mon ami."

  Randy's gaze held his, dark, intense. Seeing too much. "Really?"

  "Really." JP grabbed his wallet from his back pocket and pulled out several bills, tossing them on the bar.

  "You never know until you try."

  JP laughed, the sound too short, too brittle. "I did. Too much history."

  "History isn't always bad."

  JP laughed again and shook his head. That was easy for Randy to say. He was head over heels in love, certain of his commitment, certain of his relationship. JP didn't have that, doubted if he ever would.

  What would Randy say if JP told him? About Emily. About their daughter. And how JP had abandoned her, had just walked away when Emily needed him most.

  No. He didn't want to share that, not with anyone. Not when just thinking about what he had done caused his chest to tighten and his lungs to burn.

  Not when the need to see Emily still burned deep inside him. Why? Closure? Guilt? Something else? He didn't know, was afraid to question the need too closely. Afraid he'd act on it.

  No. He knew he'd act on it. In fact, he was going to do just that right now. The thought had been with him for the last several hours. All day, in fact, since he had spied the youth hockey schedule posted in the lobby of the practice rink after this morning's skate.

  He glanced at his watch. Practice started fifteen minutes ago. The timing was perfect.

  "Going somewhere?" Randy asked when he jumped off the stool. JP glanced at him then shrugged, trying to act nonchalant. He had the feeling that Randy didn't buy the act for a minute.

  "Yeah. I have something to do." He tossed a wave over his shoulder then threaded his way through the crowded restaurant, ignoring the calls of his teammates as he left.

  He didn't want anyone to know where he was going, didn't want anyone to know about his sudden weakness.

  Chapter Fourteen

  The rink was chilly, colder than he expected. It didn't help that the lights were too dim. JP glanced up at the ceiling, the bare metal beams nothing more than dark shadows overhead. No wonder it was dim: half the lights were off.

  He pulled the leather jacket closer around him and briefly considered going back out to the car for his sweatshirt. No, this would do for now. Now that was he actually here, he didn't want to waste time doing what it was he wanted to do.

  Even though he still wasn't sure exactly what that was.

  He moved deeper into the rink, his eyes scanning the thin crowd as shouts and laughter rang around him from the ice. The sounds were hollow, flying up into the metal rafters before falling back down with a tinny sound.

  Amazing, how different things could seem after the distance of a few hours. He never realized how sound carried on this side of the ice. Probably because he was never on this side of the ice.

  He jammed his hands into the jacket pockets and moved closer to the bleachers, his eyes scanning the metal benches. There was barely more than a handful of people here, it shouldn't be that hard to find Emily.

  What if she wasn't here? What if someone else brought Taylor to practice? He'd be standing here all night, looking for someone who wasn't even here. And wouldn't that just be perfect?

  But no, there she was. Up near the top and off to the side. She was bundled in a heavy jacket, a small blanket tucked around her legs. You'd think they were in the middle of the frozen tundra as bundled as she was.

  She looked up from the book she was reading and pushed a hunk of hair behind her ear, her gaze moving to the ice. He watched as she searched out her niece, felt something twist and roll in his gut when a smile spread across her face. JP closed his eyes, remembering a time when she used to smile at him like that. A long time ago.

  Too long.

  He shrugged off the memory and called himself a fool. A fool for remembering, a fool for coming here. What did he think he was doing? Did he really think coming here was going to accomplish anything?

  Especially when he didn't even know what it was he hoped to accomplish.

  He opened his eyes and looked back at Emily, thinking he should turn around and leave. But he didn't want to. Not when he saw some guy working his way up the bleachers, heading for Emily. JP squinted, taking in the man's features, finally recognizing him as the same man Emily had been talking to a few weeks ago at the concession stand.

  JP didn't want to know why he recognized the man. And he sure as hell didn't want to examine the blast of emotion that ripped through him when Emily smiled at the guy. Dammit. She shouldn't be smiling at men that way. Didn't she know what her smile could do to a man?

  He clenched his jaw and strode forward, his legs tearing up the distance between them, his steps loud as he climbed the metal stairs leading up to Emily. Less than a few feet separated them when she finally noticed him advancing on her. She straightened, her back rigid, her smile faltering before fading completely.

  JP paused and asked himself again what he was doing. Why was here, when it was so clear Emily wanted him gone?

  He pushed the questions and the doubt from his mind and closed the distance between them, not stopping until he stood next to Emily. He looked down and offered her a smile, hoping it didn't look as stiff as it felt.

  The man who had been talking to her watched him. JP could feel his stare. But he waited before turning his head and acknowledging him with a slight nod, his expression less than welcoming. The man took a hesitant step back then looked down at Emily, no doubt waiting for an introduction.

  Or maybe a sign that Emily didn't want him there. That would suit JP just fine. Let the fils de pute try something and he would see exactly how fast JP could be.

  Emily sighed, the sound barely more than a whisper. She shifted on the bench and held the book more tightly between her clasped hands. "Karl, this is JP. JP, this is Karl."

  Tha
t was it. Nothing more, just the briefest introduction, letting neither of them know where the other stood. It didn't matter to JP, not when he intended taking matters into his own hands.

  He offered the man another short nod then sat down next to Emily, close enough that his left side pressed flush against her right. She stiffened, just enough so JP could feel the tremor running through her body. Before she could slide away—JP had no doubt that was what she was planning—he draped his left arm around her and pulled her more tightly against his side, offering her a small grin.

  "Emily, ma douce, you're shivering."

  "No, really, I'm—"

  JP tightened his arm and pulled her even closer, fixing her with a meaningful stare. She rolled her eyes but didn't say anything. And she didn't try to move away again. JP considered that a small win.

  "I'll leave you two alone. Emily, don't forget about this weekend. The invitation is open."

  "I'll think about it. Thanks."

  The man stood there a few seconds longer, his cool gaze fixed on JP, then he smiled at Emily once more and turned to leave. JP watched him descend the steps, his gaze narrowed on the man's back as he left. "Who is that branleur?"

  "Nobody to you." Emily grabbed JP's arm and moved it from around her shoulders then slid away before he could ask if the man was somebody to her. But he didn't, couldn't bring himself to ask the question, not when the answer frightened him.

  She leaned down and tucked the book into a tote bag by her feet, then readjusted the blanket around her legs. Finally settled, she focused her attention straight ahead on the ice in front of them.

  It was a ruse, nothing more. A move designed to let him know she was ignoring him, especially since there was absolutely nothing going on right now. The kids were huddled near the bench, listening to something the coach was saying, too far away for anyone to make out the words.

  "Why are you here?"

  "What's this weekend?" JP ignored her question and asked one of his own, curiosity over the man's invitation burning deep in his gut. Emily tossed him an exasperated look, her lips thinning as she pressed them together.