Dear Louise,
A note to apologize for my behavior during my last appointment on December 30th. I hope you can forgive my negative attitude. You’re right, cancer has its positive aspect in all the lessons it can teach us about ourselves.
In the past few weeks I’ve reconsidered and have decided to accept the next bout of treatments. It seems I’m to become a grandmother for the first time—and I have a very stubborn friend who insists on staying by my side. With this kind of incentive and support, I feel I must agree to these treatments.
Thank you for your patience with me.
Sincerely,
Jillian Lawton Gordon
March 1, 2002
Jillian,
A note on your pillow to tell you that you’re the bravest person I know.
Lesley
March 2, 2002
Lesley,
A note on your pillow to let you know you’re the craziest, funniest, most wonderful friend anyone has ever had. I can’t believe you shaved your hair off for me so we could be twins! Are you nuts??! Yes—and I love it. Thank you for being my best friend.
Jillian
JILLIAN LAWTON GORDON
331 WEST END AVENUE
APARTMENT 1020
NEW YORK, NY 10023
July 3, 2002
Dearest Lesley,
I have wonderful news! The latest blood work shows that my platelet count is back to normal—and that’s the first time in almost two years. I won’t officially be in remission for a while, but it looks encouraging. Just a few months ago, I was willing to suspend all treatment, and you wouldn’t let me. I literally owe you my life.
I have another bit of news. Gary was by earlier this morning and he surprised me by announcing that he’s purchased a condominium in Boca Raton, Florida. He has family there and plans to move within the next couple of months. He asked me to marry him, which he’s done periodically over the years. He wants to teach me golf and take me sailing. He says the only reason he’s stayed in New York is me and frankly, he’s tired of waiting. It’s now or never.
I already know what you’re going to say. Marry him. I’d be a fool not to. Perhaps you’re right, but I can’t imagine leaving New York after all these years. Especially now, when the city needs support from the people who love it.
Gary loves me, I know he does, and here’s the real surprise. I love him, too. I never thought that what we shared would extend beyond friendship. I was so crazy about Nick and then Monty, I didn’t think it was in me to feel this intensely about another man.
I can already hear your next question. Why am I hesitating? Lesley, I don’t know. Am I so settled in my ways that I can’t deal with change? Am I a complete idiot? I just don’t know. I can’t bear the thought of losing Gary, and at the same time, I’m not sure another marriage is right for me, either.
If you have any pearls of wisdom to share, I’d greatly appreciate hearing them.
Love,
Jillian
Mr. and Mrs. William Chadsworth
112 Waterbury Street
London, England
July 15, 2002
Dearest Mom,
If you don’t marry him, I swear I’ll never speak to you again! All right, I will, but I’d forever think you a fool. Gary is the best thing to happen to you in years.
Enclosed is the latest ultrasound of your grandson. Isn’t he perfect? Will is walking on air. Blue is such a lovely color, isn’t it?
What do you think of the name Charles Leonard Chadsworth? It has a nice sound, don’t you think? I can hardly wait to see you. It shouldn’t be long now.
Love,
Will and Leni Jo
JILLIAN LAWTON GORDON
331 WEST END AVENUE
APARTMENT 1020
NEW YORK, NY 10023
July 29, 2002
Dear Gary,
It hasn’t even been a month but I miss you so much. A dozen times I’ve started to call you—and then remembered you’re not at that number anymore. You no longer live in New York.
I don’t blame you for growing impatient with me. I can be a stubborn fool (as my daughter and my best friend have taken pains to point out). For the first two weeks, I waited for you to come to your senses and realize we belong together. It wasn’t until this morning that I saw I was the one being unreasonable.
All right, Gary, I’ll marry you, but I don’t know if I can live in Boca Raton all year. Can we compromise? Can we divide our time between there and New York?
I feel I should warn you, my love, that there are no guarantees with regard to my cancer. It could return. It already has once, as you’re well aware. But then you’re not looking for guarantees, are you? You want a wife. We’re both young enough to travel and for my part I intend to make frequent trips to London. Charles is going to know his grandma very well indeed.
I love you.
Jillian
Lesley Milton
* * *
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Sent: August 16, 2002
Subject: Cancer Walk
Dearest Lesley,
Now that Gary and I are married, I don’t know why I held out for so long!
We delayed our trip to England until after the Cancer Walk this October; in fact, we’ve arranged our schedule around it. When I wrote you about the Walk, I was hoping you and Steven would be willing to sponsor me. I’m working hard at getting pledges from family and friends. What I didn’t expect was your refusal. I have to tell you that took me aback, I quickly figured out what you’re up to. You’re flying out here and doing the Walk with me, aren’t you? I love it! I couldn’t be more excited or pleased. It’s perfect. I’d never have survived this long journey without your love and friendship, and I’m not just talking about the cancer. You’re the type of friend who divides my grief and doubles my joy. How I treasure you and all the years we’ve shared.
Come anytime—the welcome mat is out. Gary and Steven can play chess in Central Park while you and I join thousands of other women who are cancer survivors.
The fact is, we’ve survived so much more and are the stronger for it. This is the best time of my life. I’m happy, Les, really happy—despite the sorrows I’ve experienced, with Nick’s death and Monty’s, with the devastating attack on New York, with my own illness. Or maybe because of all that. Grief makes us understand what truly matters in life, doesn’t it? Love, friendship, family. Being part of a community—and I’ve come to consider myself a New Yorker through and through. Memories… You and I have so many, and I hope we’ll be granted the time to make lots more.
I can’t wait to see you.
Love,
Jillian
Epilogue
Lesley Milton
* * *
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Sent: July 20, 2010 7:34 a.m.
Subject: Grandma Camp
Lesley,
I can’t believe you talked me into this Grandma Camp idea of yours! I don’t think I’ve slept three hours straight in the past week. These kids hardly seem to need any sleep at all—although after getting Gary and me up at six this morning they did go back to bed. (And so, of course, did Gary.) Not me, though. Which is why I’m at the computer a little earlier than usual.
Charlie, who’s almost nine, is enthralled with American baseball and wants to watch every single game on TSN. He’s declared (rather apologetically, since I’m such a New Yorker) that he’s a Boston Red Sox rather than a Yankees fan. Thankfully Gary loves baseball, too, and has taken my very English grandson to a couple of games at Yankee Stadium. I’ve been with the twins all week and trust me, they’re a handful. I’d forgotten that six-year-old girls could have this much energy—and with two of them the energy quota is doubled. No, more than doubled. Tripled. I’m not complaining, mind you, because we’re having a ridiculous amount of fun (even if I’ve had to sacrifice regular sle
ep). You’re right about this special time with grandchildren. I’m getting to really know them and they’re getting to know me. I want them to understand, to feel, how deeply I love them, how much they mean to me.
I marvel at Charlie with his lovely British accent because he reminds me of Monty. I see my husband’s smile in my grandson’s eyes. At first it stopped me cold, the way he looks and acts so like the grandfather he never knew. I can sense that Monty is watching over his grandchildren with love. He would have treasured them. But Gary’s been marvelous with all three; they call him Grandpa, and it seems completely right and natural. I heard from Leni Jo and Will, and they’re having a marvelous time in New Orleans. Will has always wanted to visit the city. I never expected my British son-in-law to become enamored with Cajun cooking. He’s purchased four cookbooks and picked up numerous bottles of hot sauce and various kinds of spices. Apparently he has every intention of preparing dishes like jambalaya and étouffée once they get back to London.
Leni Jo could hardly wait to talk to me. You’ll never guess who she met on Bourbon Street. Paul. I can’t recall his surname now, but he’s the musician Leni Jo was so crazy about fourteen or fifteen years ago. He’s working in one of the clubs—and not as a musician, either. He was tending bar. Leni Jo introduced him to Will, and Paul gave them a mint julep on the house. Leni Jo, who has such a tender heart, felt bad for him. She says he’s let the music inside him die.
On a more positive note, before the grandchildren arrived in New York, Gary and I had our annual doctors’ visits. We were both given a clean bill of health. Gary’s heart is fine and I’m still cancer-free. I’m so grateful I lived long enough to enjoy my sweet grandchildren!
Speaking of whom…Lesley and Jilly are awake. Lesley likes to cuddle in my lap and Jilly sits beside me while I read them a story. We’re reading a few chapters of Charlotte’s Web every day. They’ll be clamoring for this morning’s installment, so I’d better end this soon.
Really, Lesley—despite what might have sounded like grumbling— I’m glad you suggested Grandma Camp. I’m sure the children will remember these wonderful days we’re spending together. Yes, I know I’m in England almost as much as I am in New York and Florida, but this is different….
Get back to me soon and tell me exactly when you and Steven plan to visit us in Florida next winter. You’ve talked about wintering here so often, I feel compelled to tell you that the condo next to ours is up for sale—and at a good price, too. Gary and I are friends with the Greensteins (we all had drinks with them on the balcony, remember?) and they wanted me to mention this. Think about it. The last time we even lived in the same town was when we were in high school. Wouldn’t it be divine to be neighbors?
Email me soon.
Love,
Jillian
Jillian Gordon
* * *
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Sent: July 22, 2010 8:20 p.m.
Subject: Grandma Camp
Dearest Jillian,
You always could make me laugh! I can just picture you with Charlie and the twins. No doubt they ran you ragged before noon. I, on the other hand, had the advantage of having raised four children, so Grandma Camp was less of a shock to my system. During the early days of motherhood, I was single—as you well remember. Looking back, I wonder how I ever survived those years. I do know that your friendship, love and encouragement went a long way toward helping me do it. The fact that I now have four adult children, each of them established in life and doing well, feels like a miracle. They’ve all had to face their own demons, but that wasn’t unexpected. Their father was an alcoholic and their mother too confused and co-dependent to do anything more than cope. I find my children truly amazing. I’m so proud of each one.
Did I mention that David and Meagan came by for dinner on Sunday? Steven stood guard over the barbecue and did an impressive job with the marinated chicken. (Lindy gave him the recipe.) Davy, who isn’t quite fifteen, is talking about getting his driver’s license. He’s already picked out the type of car he wants. His father reminded him that if he wants to drive, he has to keep up his grades, which shouldn’t be a problem since he’s a smart boy. Hard to believe my oldest grandchild is about to start high school!
Do you remember when Sister Agnes gave you a demerit during our third year at Holy Name Academy? You’d rolled up the waistband of your skirt so it didn’t touch the ground when you knelt down. How scandalous!! Can you imagine what Sister Agnes would think of the way girls dress these days? Times sure have changed.
Lindy and I talk every day. How the two of us ever survived her teenage years is beyond me. She chose well when she married Jordan. He’s been a good husband and father to her and their three children. We’re close, as close as you and Leni Jo, and I’m so grateful for that. I don’t know how she manages with her job at the hospital, her family and everything else—and yet she does.
Oh, Doug phoned early this morning with some great news. Word is that the Navy will probably station him in Bremerton. That’ll be the first time my son and his family will live in the state of Washington since he enlisted back in 1989. I’m over the moon at the thought of having Doug, Julie and their kids, Josie and Paul, close by. They love California, but Seattle will always be their home. It made this mother/grandmother very happy to know I won’t need to book a flight in order to see them or drive to the airport to pick them up. Josie and Paul hardly know their cousins. Other than you, my cousins were my best friends when we were growing up; Josie and Paul have never had the opportunity to spend more than a week or two with theirs. Lindy wants to host a welcome party for them, which is so like her.
I don’t hear from Chris as often as I’d like. He has two years of sobriety and is now doing well. I worry about his finances but he never comes to me for money. I’m grateful he’s taking responsibility for himself. Getting him into rehab was the best thing we could’ve done. He often thanks me for the family intervention we did with him. He hated having to admit he’s an alcoholic but heaven knows he came by it honestly. Seeing my son succeed (so far!) in his struggle with alcohol makes me wonder what might have happened if Buck had been able to get the help he needed. For all his faults, I think Buck wanted to be a good father. He simply didn’t know how. Thankfully Steven gave my children a great example of what a husband and father should be. They all love him. Honestly, Jillian, I don’t know what my life would be like without him. He’s been so good to me and my family. I thank God every day for sending Steven into my life.
My goodness, I have gotten long-winded in my old age, haven’t I? I wanted to let you know I think you’re brave and wonderful for entertaining your grandchildren at your very own Grandma Camp. And I’m so pleased both you and Gary have a clean bill of health.
Mainly I wanted to tell you that Steven and I are seriously interested in the Greensteins’ condo.
Just think—we could be neighbors next winter. Oh, Jillian, we’d have so much fun! Imagine living right next door to my very best friend! As soon as you get more details, send them on.
Love,
Lesley
Lesley Milton
* * *
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Sent: July 23, 2010 3:40 p.m.
Subject: Grandma Camp (and Florida)
Lesley,
Gary and I just got home from taking the grandkids to see the Frick Collection, which is my favorite museum ever. I can hear the girls chattering away in their bedroom, and Charlie’s looking for a ball game on the TV. So I’m taking advantage of this brief period of quiet to email you back.
I’m sending the Realtor’s information in a separate message. Fingers crossed that this works out!
You know, I have a lot to be thankful for—my family, my health, my very comfortable retirement. And my friendship with you. It’s one of the most important things in my life.
&
nbsp; Love,
Jillian
Jillian Gordon
* * *
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Sent: July 23, 2010 7:59 p.m.
Subject: Grandma Camp (and Florida)
Jillian,
Got the real estate info. Thanks!! We’ll get on this right away. Ditto everything you said in your email about reasons for gratitude. You and I—we’re very blessed. As my grandkids say, we’re BFFs. And it really is forever.
Next winter in Florida, on your balcony or ours, we’ll raise a glass to friendship. Can’t wait!
Much love,
Lesley
ISBN: 978-1-4268-8432-0
BETWEEN FRIENDS
Copyright © 2002 by Debbie Macomber
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher, MIRA Books, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario, Canada M3B 3K9.
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Between Friends Page 28
