Sweet Spot

by Susan Mallery

  When he couldn’t find an answer, he left the car and walked up to the front door. Nicole opened before he could knock.

  She looked tired and apprehensive. Despite the raging emotions inside of him, he found himself wanting to pull her close and hold her. He wasn’t sure if the action was supposed to make her feel better or him.

  “I figured you’d drop by,” she said, stepping back to let him in. “You missed the big excitement. Sheila had her puppies.”

  “How many?”

  “Three. Two girls and a boy.”

  He nodded, then glanced toward the stairs. “I want to talk to Brittany.”

  “I figured. Are you going to yell at her?”

  “Probably.”

  Nicole sighed. “Not a great way to start the conversation. You might try listening.”

  “She has nothing to say that I want to hear.”

  “Then why talk at all?”

  He didn’t have an answer for that. Nicole shrugged, then headed upstairs. A few minutes later, she returned, without Brittany.

  “She’s refusing to come out.”

  “What did you tell her?” he demanded.

  Nicole’s expression hardened. “Absolutely nothing, but please, feel free not to believe me. Go up and yell through the door. She’ll tell you herself.”

  She turned away, then faced him again. “I swear, if I thought I was strong enough, I’d shake you. You do know that I’m on your side, right? Does it occur to you that I understand a little of what you’re feeling? I’m not the enemy here. I am not in favor of them getting married. They’re both too young and unprepared. I don’t even know if they should keep the baby. But hey, go ahead. Yell at me. I’m an easy target.”

  He felt stupid and ineffectual. It wasn’t a comfortable combination. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I didn’t expect any of this. She told me she and Raoul weren’t having sex.”

  “And you believed her?”

  He nodded. “She’s never lied to be before. I thought she’d tell me.”

  “Not a smart assumption.”

  “I know.”

  She sighed. “So you’re done yelling at me?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good.”

  She still looked annoyed, but he had a feeling they were going to be okay.

  She was nothing like Serena, who had always deferred to him. Nicole did things her way and didn’t take any crap from anyone. He kind of liked that.

  She led the way into the living room and pointed at the sectional. “Have a seat. This is going to take a while.”

  He shook his head and paced to the window. “At least I’m done having kids. I always told myself I was glad I’d had my family early and this only reinforces my opinion.”

  Nicole smiled a wicked smile that had him bracing himself. “What?” he asked.

  “You’re going to have to learn to like kids a little.” She paused. “You’re going to be a grandfather.”

  He swore under his breath, walked to the sofa and sat down. He could feel his hair turning white as he considered what her words meant. “My baby is having a baby. How is that possible?”

  “Your mom didn’t have that talk with you?”

  “This is not funny.”

  “You’re going to be a grandfather, Hawk. It’s a little funny.”

  He ignored that. Brittany pregnant? He’d heard the words before, but this was the first time he understood what they meant. She would be a mother. She would have responsibilities for the rest of her life. Everything had changed.

  “I can’t do this,” he muttered.

  “You don’t have a choice.”

  Simple words that reminded him of another time and another conversation much like this one. Only he had been the optimistic, slightly defiant, terrified teenager.

  “My dad died when I was pretty young,” he said. “I don’t remember much about him except he always made my mother cry and she was a strong woman. She raised me herself, teaching me that I had to work for what I wanted and how important it was to dream big. She was always proud of me. The only time I disappointed her was when I told her Serena was pregnant.”

  He still remembered the way she’d looked so sad, as if all her hopes and expectations had been crushed. He’d been determined to prove to her that he hadn’t screwed up entirely.

  “We made it without asking her for anything,” he said quietly. “I wanted that more than anything.” Proving himself to her had meant a lot. Did his opinion matter as much to Brittany?

  “Where did I go wrong?” he asked.

  Nicole sighed. “I don’t have an answer. I want to say you trusted her too much, but maybe it would have happened no matter what. It’s what teenagers do. At least some of them. Jesse discovered boys when she was about fifteen. I was horrified, but short of chaining her up in her room, I couldn’t stop her. I tried curfews, grounding her, phoning the parents of all of her friends to find out if she was really where she said. But she found a way.”

  She leaned back on the cushion. “I can’t tell you the exact moment things went wrong and believe me, I’ve tried to look. I wanted her to have everything she wanted but our definitions of that were different.”

  “My mom would be really disappointed by this,” he said. “I don’t know what would hurt her more. That Brittany screwed up or that I didn’t stop her.”

  “Were you listening?” Nicole asked. “How were you supposed to stop her? You had no reason not to trust her.”

  “I should have known.”

  “Beating yourself up doesn’t solve the problem.”

  “Meaning don’t make it about me.”

  “Something like that.”

  He barely knew the questions, which meant he wasn’t going to find answers anytime soon.

  “You’re probably going to tell me not to go up there and break in her bedroom door so she has to talk to me.”

  “Yes.”

  He looked at the ceiling. He’d never not been able to talk to Brittany. They’d always been able to work out their problems. Why did this have to be different?

  “I’m still pissed as hell at Raoul,” he muttered, “but I’m losing energy for killing him.”

  “I’m sure he’ll be excited to know that.”

  He leaned forward and rested his forearms on his thighs. “I don’t know what to do.”

  “You don’t have to do anything right now. Give it a little more time.”

  Walking away went against everything he believed, but short of physically dragging Brittany home, did he have a choice?

  “I’ll give her another day,” he said. “Then she’s going to have to face me.”

  “That seems fair.”

  He stood and walked to the door. “You doing okay?”

  “No, but I’ll survive. Sheila’s puppies are a good distraction.”

  “More babies.”

  She nodded. “Just to be clear. As soon as she’s done nursing, I’m getting her fixed.”

  NICOLE HAD BEEN DEALING with a headache on and off since Brittany had walked out with the stick that told the world she was having a baby. Now she popped a couple more ibuprofen with a big glass of water, all the while wondering if chocolate or ice cream would make the better chaser.

  “I need a vacation,” she muttered, thinking that doing her quarterly taxes for the bakery had never looked so good. Math might not be her thing, but she understood it and it never talked back, slammed doors or glared at her.

  She went upstairs and knocked on Brittany’s door. “He’s gone,” she called. “You can come out now.”

  Brittany pulled her door open. Tears streaked her face. “He left? He didn’t try to talk to me?”

  “You said you weren’t going to speak to him. He believed you. Kind of the way he did when you told him you weren’t sleeping with Raoul.”

  Brittany folded her arms across her chest. “You can’t talk to me like that.”

  “It’s my house, honey. I can talk to you any way I want. I’m cut
ting you some slack because this all just happened, but the next time your father comes over, you will speak to him.”

  “Not if I don’t want to.”

  Raoul stepped into the hallway. At least he was following the rules and staying out of Brittany’s room…as far as she knew. Nicole wasn’t sure she trusted either of them right now.

  “Brittany,” he said gently. “Nicole is helping us.”

  Brittany didn’t look convinced. “You’re telling me what to do.”

  “Yes. Mostly because you’re a minor and hey, this is still my house.”

  “I don’t like all these rules.”

  “You’re free to go home.”

  Tears spilled down Brittany’s cheeks. “I thought you liked me.”

  “Liking you has nothing to do with this situation. You’re pregnant. That means it’s time to grow up and part of that is having a rational adultlike conversation with your father.”

  “He’s going to yell at me.”

  “Something you deserve.”

  Brittany turned to Raoul. “Make her stop being mean.”

  Raoul looked helpless.

  Nicole felt sorry for him. If they went through with the marriage, he was going to have a tough road dealing with Daddy’s little girl. Would having a child help Brittany grow up or would she be one of the drama-queen mothers, insisting on always being the center of the universe? If only they didn’t have to find out.

  HAWK WAS WAITING in the backyard of his house, with the barbecue going and a bottle of white wine chilling on ice. Nicole pushed the gate open.

  “Is it safe to enter?” she asked, crossing toward him.

  “I invited you.”

  “I thought maybe it was a trap.”

  He’d called about an hour ago and asked if she wanted to join him for dinner. She’d been surprised, but had accepted. If nothing else, they had a few things to talk about.

  “No trap,” he said as he pulled her against him and kissed her.

  Despite everything, she melted into his embrace, getting lost in the feel of his mouth against hers. Lips pressed as heat built. Passion ignited, making her both weak and impossibly strong. The fire between them promised to heal or at least allow them to forget for the moment.

  It had never been like this for her before. The speed with which he turned her on. How much she wanted him, wanted them together.

  She buried her fingers in his hair and let herself lean on him. His muscles were hard, as was his erection. He dropped his hands to her rear and squeezed.

  Wanting escalated into something alive and undeniable. She forgot whatever she’d been planning to say and instead slipped her hands under his polo shirt so she could touch bare skin. He was strong and tempting and everything she’d ever wanted. Their breath mingled as his tongue stroked hers, arousing with every touch.

  He released her long enough to turn off the barbecue, then nudge her toward the back door of the house. When they were inside, he grabbed the hem of her T-shirt and pulled it over her head. Even as they kissed and she sucked his lower lip, he unfastened her bra and tossed it away. Then he touched her curves and she was lost.

  His hands were everywhere. On her breasts, her sides, her back. He shoved her jeans down and pushed his fingers between her legs. She was already hot and wet and surged against his touch.

  He found her center immediately and began to rub it. Tension pulled at her muscles. They kissed over and over while he circled and brushed, then plunged his fingers inside of her. It wasn’t enough. It would never be enough, she thought frantically. She needed all of him.

  Even as she pulsed her hips and felt herself getting closer, she reached between them and unfastened his jeans. He moved them both backward until she felt the back of the kitchen table against her thighs. He eased her onto the hard surface. She pushed off the rest of her clothes, slid back and parted her legs.

  Hawk pushed down his jeans and briefs and thrust into her. She arched back, bracing herself with her arms. Her eyes fluttered closed.

  He moved in and out of her, taking her higher and higher. One of his hands still rubbed her center, while the other played with her breasts. The room was silent except for the sound of their breathing and her gasps as she got closer and closer to her orgasm.

  “Hawk,” she breathed and wrapped her legs around his hips. “Harder.”

  She meant all of it. His touch, the way he filled her over and over again. Harder and faster, taking her until she had no choice but to get lost in a convulsion of pleasure and liquid release.

  He followed immediately, groaning her name and shuddering. Then they were still.

  After a couple of steadying breaths, she began to be aware of the fact that she was naked…on his kitchen table. She opened her eyes and found him watching her.

  “You eat breakfast here,” she said.

  He smiled. “I know.”

  “You might want to clean it before tomorrow morning.”

  He laughed and kissed her. “You’re amazing.”

  “So I’ve heard. It’s been in all the papers. I’m thinking of getting cards printed up.”

  He brushed her hair off her face. “Thank you.”

  “For?”

  “Everything.”

  She sighed and knew she could do this with him forever. Not just the sex, but all of it. Looking into his eyes, being close, sharing. Her stomach growled.

  He grinned. “Not eating much these days?”

  “It’s been a little stressful.”

  “How about salmon?”

  “Sounds good.”

  He stepped back and she slid to the floor. He helped her find her clothes, then opened the wine while she dressed. All he’d had to do was refasten his jeans and pull up the zipper. Men had it so easy. Not that she was complaining.

  AFTER DINNER, Nicole curled up next to Hawk on the sofa.

  “We should probably fight now,” she told him.

  “Is that next on our list?”

  “We have a lot to talk about.”

  “Brittany.”

  “Mostly.” She put her hand on his thigh. “Your daughter is spoiled and a little immature.”

  “I know.”

  That surprised her. “I thought you’d deny it.”

  “I want to, but I can’t. I didn’t set out for her to be that way. Serena did a better job with balance than I did. Once she was gone, it was just Brittany and me. Sometimes I did what was easy rather than what was right.”

  His admission was unexpected. “So you’re saying it’s all your fault?”

  “Part of it is my fault. She’s not a bad kid.”

  “I agree, but she’s used to getting her way and Raoul loves her enough to go along with what she says.” She risked the good mood and said, “I don’t think they should get married.”

  “I agree, but once she turns eighteen, I can’t stop her from doing anything.”

  Nicole wasn’t so sure. If Hawk got serious about being honest with Brittany, that might change things. Threatening Raoul wouldn’t work—he was too honorable.

  “This is all a mess,” she said. “You’re going to have to take one of the puppies to help make up for putting me through this.”

  “I’ll take the boy.”

  “Of course. I’m not even surprised.”

  She sat up and reached for the bottle of wine. As she moved, she caught sight of the porcelain rabbits on the coffee table and the aging silk flower arrangement. This was still Serena’s house and no amount of sex on the kitchen table was going to change that. Her ghost was a tangible presence everywhere. Was that on purpose?

  “Have you brought a lot of women here?” she asked.

  Hawk frowned. “What?”

  “Other women. You’ve had a couple of serious relationships since you lost Serena. Did you bring any of your lady friends here?”

  “First, I don’t call them my lady friends. Second, I’ve been careful about who I introduce to Brittany. But yes, one or two have been over. Why?”
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  “I just wondered.”

  She wasn’t comfortable simply asking her questions. Like did he keep this house this way because he was a guy and it never occurred to him to paint and box up some of the memories, or was he trying to warn off all who entered? Did he like this still being Serena’s house?

  Under other circumstances, she wouldn’t much care about the answers, but she was in love with Hawk so they mattered a lot. Had she fallen for a wonderful man only to lose him to a ghost, or was there a chance?

  “I told Brittany she doesn’t get to pout much longer,” Nicole said, choosing safety over knowledge and changing the subject. “She’s going to have to talk to you the next time you come over.”

  He leaned back and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “When did everything change? She used to be my little girl. I used to be her world. That’s all gone.”

  “She’s growing up.”

  “I don’t want to lose her.”

  “She’s not lost. It’s just different.”

  “I don’t like different.”

  “You don’t get to pick.”

  “What am I supposed to say to her?” he asked.

  “That you love her and you’ll work it out.”

  “I want to beat the crap out of Raoul.”

  “Sorry, no. It took both of them to do this.”

  “She’s my daughter.”

  Which said everything, Nicole thought. Brittany was family and she mattered more than anything.

  She was surprised at the ache in her chest, then realized the cause. She wanted someone to feel that way about her. She wanted to be loved. And not just by anyone, but by Hawk.

  An impossible situation, she thought. Was that just like her or what?

  “I should be getting back,” she said. “I don’t want to leave them alone late at night.”

  “The damage has been done.”

  “I know, but I’m responsible. I can’t help myself. It’s like a disease. One day I’m going to learn to embrace my inner control freak.”

  “I like your inner control freak.”

  He walked her to her car and kissed her. The familiar need rose up inside but she ignored it. As much as she would like nothing more than intimate time with Hawk, she really did want to get home.

  “Rain check?” she asked.