Shattered

by Kele Moon

  Desmon growled, showing off long teeth.

  “I could be wrong, but I don’t think this is helping his problem,” Jazz said dryly. “He’s not your ex-husband. Desmon has integrity. He would never hurt you. Male wolves go insane when they’re separated from their mates. As you can see, his need for you is unbending, even after all these years. He’s not human. Not even a little.”

  Amber turned back to Jazz and reminded him, “His mother was human.”

  “His mother was a wolf when she had him. Nesso turned her right away when they mated. Desmon’s not just a werewolf, he’s not even an ordinary alpha werewolf. He’s the strongest alpha I know, and I’m telling you that he’s a danger as long as he knows his very vulnerable human mate is unclaimed and unprotected.”

  Amber nodded, knowing he was telling the truth.

  Desmon had just tried to kill his best friend because of her.

  “Can I have a week?” she asked hopefully, part of her still clinging to the dreams of her youth. “My people don’t have instincts like wolves do. We need dates and flowers and long nights snuggled under the covers watching movies together, so we know we’re making the right choice.”

  “The right choice…like you made with your ex-husband?” Jazz asked darkly.

  “Shut up, Jazz,” Desmon growled at his friend. “My father used to buy my mother flowers and go on dates with her. If he could play human for her, I can do the same for Amber.”

  Jazz sighed as he looked at the two of them. Then he wiped at the blood running down his arm again.

  “I’m sorry. It’s a bad time of the month,” Jazz mumbled as he stared at the sticky crimson stain on his open palm. “The fight wasn’t all your fault. I egged you on.”

  “Bad time of the month?” Amber questioned. “Is there wolf PMS I need to know about?”

  “Sort of,” Desmon explained behind her in that growly alpha-wolf voice. “It’s a full moon tonight. We’re susceptible to it. It forces our inner wolves closer to the surface. Makes us more carnal.”

  “I guess that part of the legend is true,” Amber whispered. “How strange.”

  “Not really. Humans are susceptible to the full moon, too. We’re just more in tune with our animal instincts.” Jazz looked at his bloody arm again, sadness suddenly written all over his face. “I’m feeling confrontational, too. It’s hard for me to understand why you won’t claim your mate if you have her in front of you. On a full moon, my wolf gets bitter.”

  “That’s understandable.” Desmon sighed. “You should go to Mike and get that stitched up so it won’t scar before it heals.”

  Jazz shrugged, like he could care less about a scar, but he got to his feet anyway. He walked to the entryway, but looked back at them when he reached the front door. “I’m right about this. You two need to either mate or separate.” Jazz gave Amber a sympathetic look. “Desmon’s wolf has been without his mate for too long.”

  “I just need a week,” Amber promised, hoping it would be enough. “That’s all I’m asking for.”

  Jazz nodded in understanding before he turned the knob and left without arguing.

  8

  Desmon and Amber stood there in silence afterward. She was trying to deal with the turbulent wash of emotions that were probably clouding her good judgment. Desmon was obviously having the same problem.

  He left to go to the bathroom and wash up.

  Desmon finally broke the silence when he came back. “I’m sorry.”

  “I am too.” She turned back to him, seeing nothing but a watery blur when tears threatened without warning. “You should’ve picked one of your own kind instead of me. Everything that’s happened to us is because I’m human. I bet you wish I didn’t find you injured that day.”

  “Hey.” Desmon stepped forward and wrapped his big strong arms around her. “I’ve never once wished that. Not once, Ams. Most days, you were the only thing I had to look forward to when I was a pup. When my dad was killed, you were the one who held me and let me be weak. Who knows what I would’ve turned into if I didn’t have your humanity to soothe me as a child?”

  Amber remembered the day Desmon came to her, sitting in their secret hideout, sobbing on her shoulder after his father was killed. At ten, she hadn’t known how to soothe a loss that horrific, but she’d stroked his hair and let him cry until he’d finally fallen asleep curled on his side, with his head resting on her leg.

  “Mourning your father is not a weakness, Des,” she reminded him softly, her heart hurting at the memory. “I would’ve been worried about you if you didn’t cry.”

  “At that time, in this pack, it was a weakness. You don’t know what we dealt with after Albert took over. I never told you because it was too horrific.” Desmon squeezed her tighter, but he looked away like he couldn’t bare for her to see him when he confessed, “He took my mother after he claimed the pack. He attempted to force a mating, but her wolf would never accept him, no matter how hard he tried.”

  “Did he rape her?” Amber asked in shock.

  “He fed her his blood. She was in bloodlust, but she was also in mourning over my father. Then, when she got pregnant, he was hopeful that at least he would have another son, but Hope was born instead.”

  Amber stared at him in disbelief. “You have a sister?”

  Desmon nodded. “Yes, I do.”

  “Oh my God. She’s Jazz’s sister, too.” Amber was surprised he hadn’t mentioned his sister before now. “Why didn’t I see her at the funeral?”

  “Albert was so disgusted with my mother for having a girl and constantly denying his mating attempts, even in throes of bloodlust, that he gave up and publicly rejected her. After that, you honestly wouldn’t believe how low her pack status was.”

  “How low was it?” Amber asked, eyes wide.

  “He marked her as a pack whore.” Desmon looked away, the pain showing on his face. “That’s how he controlled me afterward. As long as I went along with his will, he wouldn’t let his enforcer’s use her. If I behaved, they left my mother alone. She and my sister were safe, but only if I was loyal. I risked everything when I went after Albert. I was so young, so fucking angry. I didn’t think it through like I should’ve, but I got lucky. What would’ve happened to my mother and Hope if we hadn’t won? I can’t even think about it.”

  “My God, Des.” Amber’s heart hurt for him. So young, and forced to protect his mother from something unimaginable. “I’m so sorry.”

  “After I killed Albert, Jazz and I took the pack. We sent my mother and Hope away. We had to. They were in danger here, especially marked like my mother was.” Desmon shrugged, like he’d long ago accepted the pain. “And my mom had spent most of her time locked up without freedom under that asshole’s rule. She and my sister deserved real lives.

  “We were fortunate to find a modern pack in Arizona, far enough away to keep them safe from wolves hungry for a territory war. More importantly, the Hunter pack doesn’t allow their males to fuck a woman just because of a mark on her body. They’ve taken in a lot of marked refugees. It won them sanctuary pack status, which earns the Hunter pack extra protection from the alpha council. It’s a safe place to be, and my mom and Hope like it there. I visit them, and so does Jazz. Their alpha lost his mate a few years ago, and he and my mother are close.”

  “They’re mated?”

  “It’s very difficult for a wolf to get over the loss of a mate. Usually, it’s only having young pups, like my mother did, that keeps them alive. And if they do survive, it’s almost impossible for them to mate a second time. But they comfort each other.”

  “They’re lovers,” Amber clarified.

  Desmon nodded again. “She lives with him, and he’s a good wolf. He protects Hope like a daughter, which is not easy these days. She’s more than old enough to attract male attention. I won’t lie to you, Amber, pack life isn’t easy on females.”

  “Your pack’s not the same as Albert’s.” Amber knew it was true. “You protect the women. You’ve e
ven been protecting my sisters, and you had no responsibility to them. You tried to make sure Merl didn’t hurt Katie, even if she was making a massively bad life choice by dating that jerk.”

  “I try.” Desmon sighed. “I don’t always succeed, but I do my best. I promise to do everything in my power to keep you safe and happy.”

  “I want to believe that.” Tears rolled down her cheeks. “Jeff promised me that once, too, Des. I need to re-learn how to trust, but I’m trying.”

  “I know.” Desmon brushed the hair off her neck, his fingers trailing down her throat, leaving a tingle of pleasure in their wake. “You need a week.” Desmon’s voice was a little growly, but he surprised her by saying, “That’s more than fair.” He pulled the edge of her dress aside, exposing her shoulder, and then kissing it. “Is fucking included in your week?”

  She snorted in amusement. “Only if you play your cards right.”

  Desmon slid one rough hand up her thigh and nipped at the curve of her neck. Her breath caught as a rush of lust flooded her senses. It should have been impossible, considering the force of her last orgasm, but she was already wet and aching with very little effort on Desmon’s part.

  “Smells like I’m playing my cards right.” Desmon brushed his fingers against the soft cotton between her thighs. “Feels like it, too.”

  She should be embarrassed, because she was so very wet, but she wasn’t. Instead, she had to ask, “Did biting me cause bloodlust again?”

  “No, this is just chemistry.” Desmon nipped at her neck again, his breath warm against her ear. “This is what happens when real mates connect. This’ll never fade away, as it does for most humans. I’ll never stop needing you.” He pushed his hips against the small of her back, letting her feel the hard outline of his cock through his suit. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”

  God, she hoped he was telling the truth, because she felt all her carefully erected walls falling for Desmon. Too much, too soon, but she couldn’t seem to stop it from happening. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to stop it. Not when she felt as alive as she did. The lust was thick in the air around them, so real Amber felt like she could almost touch it.

  The fight with Jazz must’ve left Desmon more primal than he’d been that first night when the bloodlust forced them together. While still kissing her neck, he slipped one hand under her dress. Then he started tugging on her panties impatiently, pulling them down her thighs. He fisted her hair with his other hand, not hard, but firm enough to force her head back, and damned if she didn’t let him.

  “Tell me to stop if it gets too rough.” His voice was a low growl of desire, more wolf than man, but his words sounded like a plea rather than an offer. “I’d never force you. Never. My wolf hears you. Both sides of me respond, I promise.”

  She remembered what he told her about his mother and Albert. She wanted to somehow communicate that it was okay. If she was considering tying herself to an alpha werewolf, she needed to know what it was like to have sex with one when he was more wolf than man. Still supercharged from the fight with Jazz on the day of the full moon, when he was more susceptible to the beast.

  She wanted to see him at his rawest now, rather than find out later she couldn’t handle it.

  So, she reached back and wrapped an arm around Desmon. He leaned into her with a groan, his cock still hard and thick against the small of her back, beneath his suit pants.

  She summed up all her reassurance by whispering breathlessly, “You’re wearing too many clothes, Des.”

  He must’ve understood that it was okay, because his hold on her hair got a little tighter, a little more forceful, as he started kissing and nipping at her neck once more. She let herself feel it rather than think, making herself wholly present with the werewolf she suspected she may still love—even after all these years.

  He broke the skin only once, his teething sinking into the tender flesh at the other side of her neck, like a part of him wanted to leave his mark in both places. The bite wasn’t as deep, but the pleasure rush was still unmistakable, and she cried out from it.

  He stepped back too soon, leaving her feeling empty.

  She turned around at the sound of ripping fabric and watched Desmon pull at his white button-down shirt. His jacket was already on the ground. His eyes were wild and wolf-like, making him look savage. He seemed to flash as she stared at him, the bones in his face changing slightly, and she realized a part of him wanted to shift.

  “Don’t look at me.” Desmon used his wolf voice as he grabbed her and turned her around, holding her from behind.

  Then he was pulling at her dress, the delicate fabric tearing under his alpha-wolf strength. Her bra was tossed aside next, but she still had her sandals on when Desmon pulled her down with him and the two of them fell to their knees.

  He never bothered ridding himself of his pants. There was suddenly no time, just the sound of a zipper being lowered. She heard the rip of a condom being opened, then Desmon was there. Over her. His scent surrounding her. His grip on her hip was harsh. His hold on her hair was unforgiving, but she still moaned from the pure, unfettered pleasure that washed over her when he pushed in.

  She was so wet. He was so hard, and the feel of his thick head pushing in was almost too much. She shuddered, pushing back against him, silently begging for more. Desmon gave in to his wolf and took her completely, this time like a beast, instead of the man who’d made love to her the last time.

  He was fucking her, forcing the sharp gasps of ecstasy out of her with every harsh slap of his hips against hers. His low, masculine, growls only fueled the fire, and it spiraled quickly, consuming both of them. Amber was half out of her mind with the need to come, her entire body tight, shaking.

  From far away, she heard the soft, breathless begging, and realized the voice was hers.

  Please.

  God, Des.

  Right there.

  She gasped and reached back, digging her nails into his thigh, breaking skin when he hit the same spot over and over again, stealing her breath. She didn’t care, because the bliss was like the throb of her heartbeat, harder, louder, faster, until it was suddenly everywhere

  She cried out when she shattered.

  And dragged Desmon down with her.

  His body tensed. He thrust his hips harder, faster against hers, using his hold on her hair to force her head back. Desmon growled, sounding completely inhuman. His breath was warm against the curve of her neck. She could practically feel his teeth against her tender skin, but he turned his face at the last minute and they rode out the storm like that.

  When the pleasure started to fan out, settling down the soft flickers of contentment, Amber felt Desmon’s cheek against the back of her shoulder. The brush of stubble that felt more human than werewolf. Even now, she knew he was fighting his urges—for her.

  “You didn’t bite me,” she whispered, knowing she was saying it more for herself than him.

  “No, I didn’t.” There was still the growl of wolf in his voice. “I promised.” He caressed her hair, brushing it off her sweaty forehead. “And I keep my promises.”

  God, Amber could feel herself falling for this werewolf.

  Too fast.

  Warning bells were going off everywhere, but all she did was sigh. “I know, Des.”

  Hot and cold, the wolf under Desmon’s skin was slowly going insane.

  So fucking pleased to have Amber curled up next to him, her skin still flushed pink from climaxing after Desmon took her to bed and made love to her like a human. And so goddamn miserable, because she still wasn’t his—even after he’d fucked her like a wolf on the floor in the living room.

  He trailed his fingers over the curve of her neck, admiring the tiny marks left from tasting her, and the wolf nearly howled.

  Mine.

  It was a chant in his head that started the moment he saw her in the bar, and it got louder every passing second that he didn’t claim her.

  “You okay?” Amber’s voice was
soft, sleepy with the sated hum of too much sex.

  “I’m great. Why?”

  “You made a sound.”

  “A sound?” he mumbled, and traced the mark on her neck again, not really listening.

  Mine!

  “Like a growl.” Amber looked at him over her bare shoulder, gray eyes heavy lidded, blonde hair tousled as she studied him. “What are you thinking about?”

  “Nothing.” Desmon dropped his hand, realizing he’d been admiring the bite mark, something a human might find a little scary. “Just—looking at you.”

  Amber arched an eyebrow at him. “You’re thinking wolf thoughts, aren’t you?”

  “I’m always thinking wolf thoughts.” He gave her a pointed look, even if he knew he was likely hurting his case. “I’m a wolf.”

  Amber turned back around, and he wasn’t sure if she was hiding from the truth or accepting it. Then she brushed her hair off her neck, exposing the bite mark again, like she knew all along what he was looking at.

  Desmon went back to caressing her neck longingly.

  It will only be a week.

  The wolf under his skin howled.

  MINE!

  “You made the sound again.”

  “Yeah,” he grunted, because he wasn’t sure there was anything to be done for it. “Let’s talk about our week. Can I take you out tomorrow night? Maybe to Vigo’s Steakhouse.”

  “Fancy.” A smile sounded in Amber’s voice. “But I don’t think a fifty-dollar steak is necessary. I’d say that was excessive.”

  He frowned at her, realizing she was serious.

  “Hey.” Desmon caught her shoulder, forcing Amber to roll over and look at him. “You don’t think a steak is necessary? What exactly did you mean, then, when you asked to be courted like a human?”

  “I wasn’t talking about you losing a bunch of money.” She laughed. “We can just spend time together. No sense wasting it on some place like Vigo’s.”