Knight Angels: Book of Love (Book One)
Page 26
Max shrugged, telling me with his eyes that it was something Wes and he had already discussed. “We are given wings so that when we do decide to finally pass, we can fly away.”
Max’s words chilled me. “Why didn’t you fly away?”
“Because, I was waiting for something—unfinished business.” He smiled, and Wes moaned. Max ignored him. The way his finger traced my cheek told me that the something he was waiting for was me. “I wasn’t sure just what I was waiting for, but now I know beyond every doubt.”
I felt uncomfortable by his forward comments, but I tried to press it away. I leaned into Max’s touch. “And Greg? Why doesn’t he fly away?”
“Greg won’t leave without me, and even if he could, I doubt he would at this point. He’s in love with power now. He’ll want to stay and build his legion—his unfinished business is destroying the world.”
Wes cleared his throat, interrupting us the same way he had all day. “When will he be back?” Wes asked. “Not to act like the only one that really cares, I just thought that focusing on saving Emily was rather important.”
Max dropped his hand from my face and put the car in reverse. “I’m not sure,” he said coldly.
I sat up. “So, are we just going to leave? We came all this way for nothing?” My face was twisted. I agreed with Wes; I wanted my sister back.
“No.” He backed down the drive, and then into a nook under a tree. “We’re going to wait for him. But if he comes back and the car is right there—clear as day in front of the house—then he’ll just run, and who knows how long it will be until we find him and your sister again.”
Max kept backing the car into the woods, and with how thick the trees and foliage were, I could no longer see the house. He stopped the engine and got out. Wes and I followed suit. Wes stretched as his feet hit the ground, as though the car were too small for him—which it was.
Wes yawned dramatically. “Let’s get this show on the road!”
I snorted, thinking his new state of being seemed rather urgent and yet slow at the same time.
It was cold, so I grabbed my leather coat off the seat and put it over my shoulders. I shut the door, looking at the house with both fear and excitement. I understood now, but still, I didn’t know where I fit in. Was my destiny truly with Max? Or was our destiny and connection meant for something else?
I needed answers…
Max:
The air around me was thick with memories; the house they saw run down and tired, now a place of evil. But no matter what had happened here, that was just one part of my life. The house I saw was something else—something of love.
I saw my mother on the front porch, my brother Erik and I playing baseball in the yard. I saw Greg, sitting on the steps, watching us with that same glare in his eyes. I saw my father coming home on horseback, the stables still standing behind the house. I saw the way the alchemist taught me new tricks, my father’s gaze knowing, but not willing to care.
This home had so much history, far more than any other.
Jane approached me, owning a look of curiosity.
“Max? Tell me about your life. I feel like you know so much about mine—a friend of my father’s and all. I want to know you.”
I’d heard the question in Jane’s head long before she said it, her mind weighing the gravity of such a question, hesitating slightly, only to wash the hesitation away.
I took her hand, squeezing it in a way that told her it was alright to ask. For all I knew about her, it was only fair. “Before the murders, my world had been far different—far more straight-forward. College was a prospect, and then, a respectable job that would make my father proud. My mother wanted me to marry, but I hadn’t yet found a suitable spouse, and…” I wanted to say it was because a part of me knew I’d find her one day, but it wasn’t time.
I moved on. “Magick was something that was whispered about town. There were a few kids in my circle that had it, but kept it hidden from most of the adults.”
I looked at Wes, his golden eyes like a tickle in my memory. I’d thought it for a while now, wondered if Wes, this abandoned shifter, was indeed theirs. Charlotte was a good friend of mine, and when she’d found Mark, it was like seeing what I’m sure I saw with Jane now—love. Charlotte and Mark were the same. Both had the ability to shift, finding in each other a rare confidant.
Jane cleared her throat. I looked at her, realizing I’d let my thoughts wander.
“Sorry,” I smiled. “Soon, the magickal adults in town noticed that things within their world were changing, especially within their powerful youth. It was growing, and those with magick were falling in love with humans,” I winked at her. “Because of this, a rift formed within in the magickal world, a rift that is now gaping. The two sides separated—those that wished to overtake the humans, and those that wished to preserve them, like your father. Purists within the magickal world who were on the side of overtaking the humans felt threatened by the dilution of genes the human and magickal union would create. What those beings didn’t understand, though, was the fact that love was blind. Many amongst those that saw the unions as blasphemy were hypocrites, often cavorting with human women and men, not bothering to acknowledge their accidental magickal offspring. Most human never knew, and still don’t know of this rift, and we hope to keep it that way. Even your mother doesn’t know about us.”
“But I know,” Jane smiled.
I tilted my head, touching her chin. “You’re different. You’re a Sheol.”
She giggled. “Go on.”
“My mother and father loved each other, but my mother’s love wasn’t as strong as my father’s. Like I’ve mentioned, she fell in love with the clear-blue eyes of the alchemist across town, and though my father knew, he denied it. He loved her too much to let the affair ruin them, and so he let it continue—let her think that he didn’t know. The alchemist was a doctor, but also a natural sorcerer, mixing potions no human could. Not long before our death, the affair was exposed, marking the beginning of the official war when Greg killed the whole family, placing Greg and I in a position of blame after our death.”
“That hardly seems fair. You were so young, and you had no idea!” Jane’s head was full of compassion, a thing I loved about her.
I took her hand as we walked toward the house, Wes wandering ahead. “After that, there’s no real record of exactly what happened because it was pure chaos. It had split the two worlds forever, sending a ripple throughout the magickal world. Still though, a small group of magickal beings remained in Glenwood Springs, receding into the caves of the mountains where they formed the Priory. We were left to protect the humans.”
“So, are they still there?”
I shrugged. It’d been a long while since I’d been back. I’d previously severed my ties with the Priory, no longer able to handle the duty and guilt it entailed.
Jane let go of my hand, satisfied with the story I’d told her. She wandered into the yard. I stopped, gazing back at the house, though my peripherals never left Jane.
When I’d found Jane, long ago, I knew I’d found what it was my mother had with the alchemist. Until that point, I’d always been confused by my mother’s dangerous game, but it was then that I understood. The boundaries of magick did not stop love—love really was universal.
I looked up, seeing Jane had stopped in front of a stone. I walked up beside her. She was reading the words carved into the stone—the names of my mother and father.
“Is this…” Her voice was soft, allowing her mind to finish the question.
“Yes.” I pushed my hands in my pockets. I felt my parents’ presence among us, wrapping me in a cloud of comfort. They were here with me, but I couldn’t see them because they’d crossed to a place I hadn’t. There was no denying that being here was hard for me.
She continued to stare at the stone, her breathing shallow. She felt surprisingly calm despite the circumstances, but it was the death inside her that kept her that way. She had seen death, felt it creep
upon her. It was something that fascinated her. It was what fascinated me about her.
“Max? Do you ever get past it? The death, I mean. Does it get easier to deal with?” Only her lips moved.
I heard my mother breathe in my ear, trying to whisper to me, but I couldn’t make out the words. “It does get easier, but it’s also what makes you so unique.” I sensed a sudden apprehension from Jane as she stared at my parent’s names. They had been laid to rest beside each other, though their falsified love did not extend to the afterlife.
“Why did you want to save me again?” she said bluntly.
I could sense her backtracking. Though I had told her about her father’s wishes, and my connection, I knew it still hadn’t been enough to justify her current situation. I thought for a moment.
“Jane, I’ve told you this…” I’d tortured Wes enough already, and I sensed his tension. He didn’t need to feel more pain.
Jane didn’t seem satisfied with my response as she kicked at the dirt on the ground. “I don’t like that answer. I want a real reason. It doesn’t seem to warrant why you risked so much to save me.” She frowned. “I know what my father asked of you, but you would have saved me anyway.”
She was right. I would have. I took my hands out of my pockets, looking into my palms. They were so pale, and yet they were the only thing I knew better than Jane’s face. “There was something about you, like I said.” Wes was climbing up the steps of the house. I watched him from the corner of my eye.
“But what? What was so different for you? It’s more than just a crush, isn’t it?” She was being difficult. She wanted an even better answer—a personal answer. “You don’t risk as much as you did over a hunch.”
I’d hoped the kiss was enough to explain it, enough so that she could see and feel what I’d meant by connection. I knew she wasn’t ready to hear what I had to say, but the want in her eyes was so great, I didn’t want to resist her wish.
“Jane, I just—”
Her eyes narrowed, the want now becoming a demand.
I swallowed. “Love, Jane. Because I loved you.” The words were thick, and they choked in my throat. I’d used the term fate, and connection, but not yet love. “The mad, deep, and forever kind of love rushed over me in that instant, Jane.” I was making it worse for myself, but the truth was all I could say. “When I saw you, I saw what my mother had in the alchemist. I couldn’t let that go. Even though you were so young at the time, I knew the day would come.” I had let it pour.
She stood for a few more moments, perfectly still. Her heart had not changed but her mind felt confused. “Oh.”
I blinked rapidly, desperately wanting to hear her thoughts, but they were suddenly shut away. I hadn’t necessarily expected that type of response, though I feared it. I’d expressed my intentions to her all day, but not like that. I’d foolishly let myself be exposed. I was suddenly so confused. All this was still so abrupt, and here I was, forcing love upon her when she wasn’t ready. I should have waited to say that phrase. I was such an idiot.
I heard my parents leave me then, the warmth they’d surrounded me with now filling the air with chill. Jane shivered slightly, feeling what I had. I took my attention off Wes, now seeing Jane move her hand and lift it before her. Her fingers toyed with the ring on her hand. She turned and walked away from me, leaving the sound of crunching leaves drumming in my head.
My eyes traced the names of my parents on the stone, and then I shut them. I drew in a heavy breath, my mind racing. I tried hard to read Jane’s thoughts one more time, but they were still clouded.
I was a selfish fool for doing what I did, and I was an idiot for saying that I loved her.
Jane:
I needed my space. What was happening?
Love—it felt like a word I’d seldom thought of, but why was that feeling so strong inside myself? I had been comfortable with the idea of a crush, but hearing him say those words had sent a spark of electricity through me. Was that a good thing, or Bad? What made it happen? Was it the story of Max’s mother and the alchemist? Or was it the fact that I longed to have someone to share my every secret, someone who could protect me the way Max could? I felt like I didn’t have a choice, but did I need one?
I walked toward the house, not knowing where else to go and drawn by the murderous aura that surrounded it. Wes turned on the porch, watching me approach with a smile on his face—a smile I’d come to find as comfort, especially in a time like this. I refused to look him in the eye, instead looking at the ring. I twisted it over and over, until my finger burned from its heat.
Was I afraid to love?
I’d loved my father, and I’d lost him. It was the same feeling I felt around Max, but I barely knew him the way I’d known my father. What if Max died? What would I do then? What if he decided that he needed to fly away? I would never hold him back; I couldn’t. He belonged with his family, but had stayed behind for what?
For me? For love? For my father’s dying wish?
And what will happen when I turn eighteen, nineteen, and even twenty? I couldn’t help but compare it to the teen vampire books that Emily had grown obsessed with. Eternal love—it was so clichéd! But here I was, face to face with some helpless heroine’s same dilemma.
Would he promise me eternal love?
Would I jump in head first before I’d even known him longer than a few weeks?
I shook my head. Perhaps I had it all wrong. Perhaps he had no plan at all. I wasn’t prepared to live forever, not with death so close at mind, tickling me to come join in. Max believed there was a destiny for me in this life, and so did my father, but what?
I reached the porch, placing my foot on the first step and hoisting myself up with a heavy mind.
Wes smiled. “Hey, Kid.”
I smiled back. His words were full of reassurance, as though he knew the exact frustration I felt.
“Hey,” I murmured, in no mood to be cheery.
It’d felt like decades since I’d talked to Wes this way—like friends. Even after what had happened this summer, I knew the friendship we once had was never going to be the same. I hoped we could get past that, especially now.
Wes wrapped an arm around my shoulder in a platonic way—or at least that’s what I tried to assume. “Pretty wild, huh?” He was looking at the house.
I nodded, distracted by my thoughts. “Wes, why didn’t you tell me you were… you know…” I referenced his body and the fact that he could be any animal he wanted.
He smirked. “I didn’t think you cared.”
I gave him a playful punch in the stomach. He pretended it hurt, though it seemed it hurt me more. “You know you can tell me anything, Wes.” I rubbed my hand. “You’re… my best friend.” I was afraid to say it, but that’s what he was to me.
Wes was acting bashful now. “I know.” He reached for my hand, trying to hold it.
I snorted, ducking out from under his large arm and avoiding his grasp. “Something still tells me you don’t.” I walked up to the front door, placing my hand on the old handle and tracing it. “Wes, you understand how I feel, right? When I say friends, I really mean friends.”
He nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets, which meant he was shutting down on me.
I looked at him and smiled wearily, dropping the subject. I looked back at the old door, dotted with bits of iron. “Suppose I should just go in?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Don’t see why not.”
I looked back at Max. He was walking toward us with his head down. He looked so hurt, but I had to be selfish. I had to take the time I needed.
I twisted the handle, pressing my weight against the door as it gave slightly. The sound of small fluttering wings echoed behind the door. There was a slight breeze that blew across my face through the crack in the jam. I heard Max trot up the steps, approaching fast as he pushed against the door and it swung open and out of my hand. The door thumped against the interior wall. Clearly there was no need to be careful.
Wes shrugged. “Shall we?”
I peeked my head around the door, watching as Max walked leisurely down the hall toward the back of the house. Birds flew out from around him, fluttering upward as my gaze followed them. I saw Max shudder, the birds triggering some sort of emotion. There was a large stone staircase that spiraled to the second floor. I stepped in, and Wes followed in my footsteps.
“Max?” He’d disappeared into the house.
A moment passed.
“Yeah?” I saw his head look around the corner at the end of the long hall. “Come on,” he urged. “There’s nothing to be scared of.”
“I was just trying to be polite,” I whispered under my breath.
Wes chuckled, and I couldn’t resist a chuckle myself.
I walked into the front hall, my eyes sweeping the room. It was just like my dream, but far more real. The colors were grey, leaves piled into the corners as light flooded from the vaulted ceiling above where the roof had caved. There were paintings on the walls that depicted scenes of a world I didn’t recognize—a world that no longer existed in the present tense.
I made my way toward the back of the house where the whole room opened up. Pillars lined the back wall, large glass doors between each, though most were broken. I envisioned what it must have once been like—the grand view of the yard beyond and lavish aristocratic parties where Max’s mother would be found flirting with the magickal alchemist, just under the nose of his knowing father.
I approached the back doors. The stone floor flooded out onto a large patio that bled down into the forest. There was a large circular fountain in the middle of the yard, and stone figurines—each staring blankly ahead, frozen beautifully in time. At the end of the yard sat a grand barn, drooping with age yet still intact.