Death March to the Parallel World Rhapsody, Vol. 1 (light novel)

by Hiro Ainana

  The officials didn’t raise as much of a fuss about Tama; her status was just as impressive, but seeing something surprising for the third time in the row tends to take the shock out of it. Tama looked a little disappointed.

  “It must have been tough to raise demi-human slaves to be this strong, right?”

  “No, not at all. They’re very talented.”

  It was true that we’d gone through tough times, but the girls were talented, too. I probably wouldn’t have died without them, but I definitely would’ve fallen into traps and suffered much more than I had.

  A soldier guided the four of us onto a carriage. There were a few people aboard who had already gotten through inspection, too. There was a canopy over the cart, and armed guards stood at both exits.

  We didn’t know anybody aboard, so we rode in relative silence.

  A few of our fellow passengers seemed to dislike beastfolk, too, so I warned Pochi and Tama to behave themselves. Fear brings out an aggressive side of people.

  Finally, after a long ride in an oppressive atmosphere, we arrived at the count’s castle. There was a cloth over both openings blocking our view, so I didn’t even get to enjoy the scenery.

  When we got out of the carriage, more soldiers surrounded us and began to escort us somewhere.

  “Wh-where are you taking us?!”

  “Yeah! We went through hell to get out of that labyrinth!”

  A delinquent-looking boy and a middle-aged man with a scary face flared up at the soldiers. They’ve got some guts to do that with so many armed guards surrounding us.

  “We’re going to have you lot stay in the dungeon for a few days. Orders from the count himself. Those who refuse to cooperate will be found guilty of treason. Now be quiet and follow orders! This is a matter of public security.”

  Whoa, I thought we would just get house arrest or something! I must have underestimated the power of the aristocracy. I guess now I’m going to experience firsthand being in jail.

  I had just saved Seiryuu City from the clutches of a greater hell demon, and this was the thanks I got: a personal invitation to the dungeon. Bummer. But if I wanted to keep my identity a secret, I’d have to go along without complaining.

  The threat of being charged with treason must have worked, because from that point on, everyone followed along with the soldiers in silence. I found out later that if you’re convicted of treason, your family members are considered guilty as well.

  The dungeon was dark and a little cold. The cells didn’t even have beds, so it looked like we’d have to sleep directly on the stone floor. We were told that we’d each be given a single cloth blanket, so the nights would probably be freezing. To make matters worse, the only toilet was a pot with nothing screening it whatsoever.

  I wish they’d worry a little more about privacy around here.

  Overall, it seemed pretty miserable, but in the end, we didn’t have to spend a single night there.

  “Oi, which one of you is Satou?”

  “That’s me.”

  “Come with me. You’re in a different area.”

  A prim civil official who seemed sorely out of place in the dungeon came to summon me.

  Whoa, you want me to leave the girls in a place like this? Let’s see what my “Negotiation” skill has to say about that.

  “These three kids are my slaves. If I’m being moved elsewhere, I’d like to bring them as well, please.”

  “Hmm. I was ordered to come and get just you. I wasn’t told anything about slaves.”

  Is this the part where I offer him a little something to sweeten the deal?

  A gold coin would probably be too much, so I slipped a silver coin into the official’s hand. “Is there anything we can do about that?”

  > Skill Acquired: “Bribery”

  > Skill Acquired: “Persuasion”

  The silver seemed effective: The man’s attitude abruptly shifted.

  “…But I wasn’t told not to bring them, either. Very well, they can come along for now. Don’t blame me if they’re turned away, though.”

  “That’s fine with me.”

  I can probably just persuade the person who asked for me, too. My new skills looked like they’d help with that, so I assigned skill points to each of them. Although if I overused them, I got the feeling I’d raise an event flag to turn into a crooked trader.

  The person we were guided to was an elderly man I’d never seen before.

  “A pleasure to meet you, Sir Satou. I am Deschamps, the humble butler of the house of Belton.”

  …Aww, his name’s not Sebastian? Or Jeeves?

  “Nice to meet you, Sir Deschamps.”

  “Sir Satou, I implore you to simply call me Deschamps.”

  Calling such a fine-looking old gentleman by his name like that would be a pretty tough hurdle.

  “I am so terribly sorry about the delay in our arrangements. Imagine forcing the savior of the viscount to stay in a dungeon! Please accept our humblest apologies.”

  “Not at all. I’m grateful enough to you that I won’t have to spend a night down there. It’s fairly difficult to see, anyway.”

  Apologizing profusely all the while, Mr. Deschamps led me to one of the guesthouses. Man, this castle is huge. It’s at least as big as my old college’s campus.

  “Please avail yourself of this room. There should be a maid assigned here as well.”

  Mr. Deschamps rang a bell on a table near the door, and woman in her late twenties appeared from an adjoining room.

  Despite being a maid, she wasn’t wearing the kind of uniform you’d see in Akiba or classic Victorian England. Instead, she was wearing an ordinary dress befitting a lady-in-waiting.

  So they don’t have aprons or lace headpieces here yet, huh? I’d think a Japanese person should introduce that before miso or soy sauce. Okay, maybe not, but still. How disappointing.

  “I’ll be taking my leave here, by your pardon, but if there’s anything you need, please don’t hesitate to ask the attending maid. This is only a trifling little thing, but it’s a token of appreciation from our master.”

  Mr. Deschamps handed me a small pouch. There wasn’t money inside but some small pebble-like objects. Probably precious stones. Although if it was candy, that’d be pretty funny.

  It would be rude to refuse, so I accepted it while giving my thanks to be relayed to the viscount. I would’ve preferred to thank him in person, but since he was sending his butler to give me this, he must be too busy to meet me. I think a viscount is one step down from a count, after all.

  Still, if memory served me correctly, a ranked noble living in a different noble’s territory seemed pretty unusual. I guess even if the titles were similar, I shouldn’t just carelessly assume the system was exactly the same as in medieval Europe.

  Leaving the rest to the maid, Mr. Deschamps left.

  “Please, allow me to show you to your room.”

  “Yes, please do.”

  I followed behind the maid, listening to her explanation.

  Pochi and Tama were under strict orders from Liza to stay quiet; she was carrying them in her arms like stuffed animals. With both their hands pressed over their mouths, their pose was pretty adorable.

  The butler and the maid had both referred to this as a “room,” but the entrance hall alone was at least 130 square feet; the whole guesthouse was probably about 7,000 square feet of floor space. If this was a hotel suite, a single night’s stay would probably cost several months’ salary.

  The floor of the living room was carpeted with something like felt and contained several comfy-looking leather sofas. There were cloth-covered pillows on the furniture, too; it looked like the kind of place where I could really veg out.

  This room was about five hundred square feet, with what looked like a chimneyless fireplace against the far wall. My interest must have shown on my face, because the maid supplied an explanation.

  “This is a magic tool that utilizes fire stones. One need only touch th
is sheet copper and let magic flow into it, and the stones inside the hearth will produce heat. If you wish to adjust the temperature, simply ring the bell, and I will come right away, so please don’t hesitate to call me at any time.”

  Ooh! How very fantasy-esque.

  The chandelier on the ceiling didn’t seem to have any candles, either, so it must be another magic tool. An AR pop-up identified it as a Light Shower Chandelier. I’m looking forward to nighttime, then.

  Next we were guided to a 350-square-foot parlor.

  The furniture here was just as high-class as in the previous room, but maybe because these objects had sharper angles, they seemed more formal.

  Next was a dining room with a huge table that could probably seat a lot of people. It was made of a dark stone, possibly granite, which was smooth to the touch.

  She didn’t show them to us, but the maid briefly mentioned there was also a linen room, the maid’s waiting room, and a kitchenette attached to the parlor.

  Up the stairs by the entrance was the main bedroom, which was just as large as the living room. I practically heard trumpet fanfare as I laid eyes on the canopied king-size bed in the center. It looked like the softest thing ever.

  Pochi and Tama immediately moved to leap onto it, but fortunately, Liza had a firm hold on both of them, so the maid was unperturbed. Nice one, Liza.

  Apparently, the small room attached to this one was for servants and guards. It was really plain, with a hard-looking bed and a simple wooden chair. What an extreme contrast.

  There were restrooms on each floor, but they were pit toilets like the one at the Gatefront Inn. The toilet-paper substitute was straw paper instead of a straw bundle, so I guess that was an improvement.

  Unfortunately, it didn’t look like there was a bath.

  “Is something the matter?”

  “No, I was just thinking that I haven’t seen a bath anywhere…,” I said with the faintest hope that I might be corrected.

  “Ah, would you like to bathe? In that case, we can have the manservants bring up a tub. I’ll have everything arranged by this evening.”

  Bring up a bathtub?! Those manservants must be ripped.

  “I’m sorry to ask for something so difficult.”

  “Not at all! If you have any other requests, don’t hesitate to ask.”

  I didn’t really have anything, but I heard a small growl from someone’s stomach behind me. I wasn’t sure whether it was Pochi or Tama, but it was probably about time to eat.

  “Well then, I will go and make preparations for lunch. Is there any food that I ought to avoid? I’m happy to accommodate your tastes.”

  “No, don’t worry. I’m not too picky.”

  The maid bowed and left the room.

  Pochi and Tama had fallen asleep in Liza’s arms. So…it was Liza’s stomach that growled before? Her face was a little red, so I pretended not to have noticed anything.

  When I saw the food lined up on the table, I tilted my head in puzzlement.

  There were seven plates of various sizes, all under silver lids to keep them from cooling. But why was there only enough for one person? Was this another instance of discrimination against demi-humans?

  “Excuse me, but isn’t there any food for these children?”

  “The food for your servants has been prepared in a separate room.”

  “Would it be possible to have their portion brought here as well? Eating meals together is one of my house’s customs.”

  What I couldn’t say, of course, was that I didn’t want to eat all by myself.

  Fast food was one thing, but a feast like this should be a lively affair with as many people as possible, I think.

  The beastfolk girls were given tureens of stew with rye bread. At my request, the maid brought us extra plates so that I could share my food with the other three.

  “Mm! Food in a castle is just as delicious as I’d expect.”

  “Yummy, yummy!”

  “The meat in the stew is so big and tasty, sir!”

  “Indeed… It truly melts in the mouth, doesn’t it?”

  Uh…there’s no meat like that on my plate. Unlike my dishes, their stew had some kind of blackish chunks.

  Checking the AR screen, I saw that the meat on my plate was lamb, while theirs was wyvern. So this is what Pochi was talking about when we left the labyrinth. The three of them seem to be enjoying it, so I won’t make a fuss.

  After thanking the maid for a delicious meal, I politely requested that all four of us be given the same food for dinner, even if it meant lowering the overall quality of the spread.

  It’d be a pain to split it all up from my plates every time, after all.

  My long-awaited bath came in the form of a marble bathtub big enough for one person, carried in by four manservants.

  On top of that, several more manservants, or maybe slaves, carried in water that had been heated elsewhere, each making multiple round-trips to deliver it. This is a pretty big process. I’d been sure that they’d just have someone use Everyday Magic to fill it up in a flash.

  After more than an hour of preparation, the bath was finally ready.

  I felt kind of bad for the people who’d had to go to all the trouble to set this up, but there was no use in holding back now. I’ll tip them later.

  “Do you two want to take a bath, too?”

  “Yeah!”

  “Yes, sir!”

  Pochi and Tama were staring at the tub with great interest, so I invited them to join me. They’re only elementary-school age, so I don’t think it’s a problem if I let them take a bath with me.

  Apparently, they did have some short robes for bathing, but it didn’t make sense to soak with clothes on.

  “First, before we sit in the bath, we have to clean ourselves off.”

  I taught the kids how to use soap, which they responded to enthusiastically.

  “Waaah! It’s making white bubbly stuff!”

  “It’s slippery, sir!”

  “But it seems to be removing the dirt effectively… Is something wrong, master?”

  At some point, Liza had naturally joined in with Pochi and Tama. Her key areas were well hidden with soapsuds, but it still felt a little weird, since she was around high school age. Her chest was just as flat as the kids’, but I still couldn’t help noting the curve of her back.

  “The water’s hot, sir!”

  “It’s…weird? But it feels good!”

  “How strange to use water to wash one’s body! It’s terribly luxurious, but it feels wonderful.”

  Before we had even gotten into the tub, bath time was already a big hit. Liza looked particularly happy.

  Possibly because of all the years they’d spent as slaves, it took a while to get all the grime off them. As a result, the bathwater had cooled. I asked the maid if she could bring more warm water.

  “… Heat Kanetsu!”

  After the maid brought some water to fill the tub again, she used Everyday Magic to heat it up for us.

  So heating up a bath is cause for magic, but…?

  Well, I guess it was probably more efficient than replacing all the water…

  Wait, that’s not what’s important here.

  What I really want to know is, why does she need to wear that to do magic? She wasn’t completely naked, but in the tiny robe she was wearing, she was at least halfway there. She had a great figure, and if that robe got wet, things would definitely show through that probably shouldn’t. Things could get steamy here in more ways than one.

  Thanking her for warming the bath, I asked her about her outfit in the most roundabout way possible.

  “Ah, yes. In order to be prepared to meet your needs at any moment, I have been waiting on standby in this.”

  Ah…I see.

  With no small reluctance, I politely declined her services.

  Yeesh, that was close. If the beastfolk kids hadn’t been here, I might’ve gone down a road that would earn this game an adults-only rating.
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br />   The tub wasn’t big enough for all of us to use at once, so we went in to bathe and warm up one at a time.

  Liza seemed to have taken a liking to the bath, because she meekly asked if she could soak in it again for a while longer, so I took Pochi and Tama to dry off first.

  I wiped each of them dry with a soft towel. Now in her dress again, the maid offered to wipe me down, too, but again I politely refused.

  I didn’t know how comfortable I was with that kind of service.

  That evening, our dinner included such extravagant dishes as a huge roasted bird. It looked similar to a roast chicken to me, but apparently, it was a bird called a Shiga wiretail.

  Cutting the whole roast seemed like it’d be pretty difficult, so instead of putting on airs and insisting on doing it myself, I asked the maid for help; she cut it with truly impressive skill.

  The beastfolk kids were especially fond of the parts that were on a bone.

  Belatedly, I felt a wave of gratitude toward the viscount. This kind of treatment was worlds away from what we would’ve faced in the dungeon.

  Come to think of it, I wonder if Nidoren and his friends are down there? I couldn’t really get them out, but maybe I could see to it that they had a better time of it, at least?

  I asked the maid about it after dinner; she said they should be able to get them better food and blankets, but she didn’t have the authority to send down things like furniture. That would require a budget from the viscount.

  Is it just a matter of money? Because I can get that out of Storage.

  “How much do you think they would need?”

  “For just one person, one silver coin would be fine. However, since it’s apparently at least ten people, we would need two gold coins.”

  What, is that all? I took the money out of my pocket and gave it to the maid, requesting that she see that the conditions were improved for the people in the dungeon.

  “Yaaay!”

  “It’s so fluffy, sir!”

  Pochi and Tama jumped around on the bed.

  I guess all kids see is a trampoline when they look at a bed this big.

  Liza, too, sat down on the edge, enjoying its bounciness in her reserved way.