Lawlessly in Love

by Mercy B

  “Do they have anything that can stick?”

  “They can make some shit stick, Law. If they don’t have anything, it isn’t shit for it to be planted.” He was correct. They wanted me worse than they wanted their next promotion.

  “How long?”

  “Seventy-two hours top.”

  “I need more time.” Seventy-two hours wasn’t shit. I still had work that needed to be done.

  “That’s all the time you have.”

  “Good news?” Shit, I’d heard enough bad shit for a lifetime.

  “I finally got something on the lead detective in your case.”

  “Oh yeah?” That was surprising.

  “Yeah, she’s not so clean after all. She has some skeletons in her closet as well.”

  “Good looking.”

  “Check the toilet liner box in the second stall, and the file you need will be there.”

  “Aight. ‘Preciate you.” There was nothing left to be said.

  “No problem. And Law?”

  “Yeah?” I asked before standing.

  “I suggest you run, man. Detective Shaw has it bad for you. She won’t stop until she’s taken you down.”

  “‘Preciate that.”

  I planned to do just that. If they wanted me, they’d have to catch me. For the last two weeks, I’d been making plays and preparing my operation for my departure. Gauge had been forced to stay home for the past week because I needed a level head when securing my freedom and hers as well.

  In these types of situations, you just never knew. I’d seen girls—Brielle being one of them—taken down even when they didn’t have a clue about their man’s dealings. I refused to let that shit go down with G. She was coming with me. Shit, we were both going to be on the run.

  By the time I reached the city’s limit, Gauge had called me three times. If I had to take a wild guess, she was calling to complain about the lack of time we’d been spending. It had been the same song all week, but I had shit to do. With everything I had going on, I needed her as far away from me as I could get her.

  “What’s good, G?”

  “Don’t what’s good me, Sos. I’m coming over tonight, so get ready to open the door. I gave you a week. Whatever you don’t have done will have to get done with me there.”

  She’d just turned my house into hers. I was scared to tell her ass to chill because I knew she’d come ASAP if I did. Gauge was turning me into a pile of fluff, and it bothered me on the daily. She was the only tender spot I’d ever possessed other than my mother.

  “Who you talking to, G?”

  “You!”

  Of course she was. “Tone that shit down, or I’ll make it another week. Don’t sound like you miss a nigga anyway with all of that wolfing you’re doing.”

  “Well, I do. Plus, I’m about to give this pussy to the next fine ass man I see. It can be the mailman for all I care. I’m horny.”

  “You ever had your neck broken?” I questioned.

  “I wouldn’t have lived to tell you if I had, Sosa.”

  “Exactly. Keep playing, and you won’t live to tell the next motherfucker either.”

  “Where are you?” She softened.

  “Handling business. I need you to chill, G. A lot is going on right now. I ain’t dodging you; I’m just working.”

  “I know. I just miss you. I’m coming over tonight, and I’m not taking no for an answer. I need some sex and some of your time.”

  “And you can have both, baby girl. Just let me finish what I’m doing, and I’ll see you tonight. I’ll be home around eight.”

  “I’ll be there a minute after—8:01.”

  “I believe you too.”

  “Because you know I’m not lying.”

  “Catch you later, G.”

  I had to be the one to end the call. If she could, Gauge would hold the phone all damn day. She was spoiled rotten, and I was regretting making her that way. Now, the distance I needed to secure our future was causing a ruckus. She wasn’t having that shit, really. In a way, it made me proud. I’d never had anyone as eager to simply be in my presence before. Not because of the money, status, or for gain; Gauge just wanted me. I could remove the millions of hats I wore each day, and that in itself was addictive.

  True to my word, I made it to the house a little after seven. Knowing that Gauge was waiting to see me, I texted her to let her know that I had made it. I could imagine how fast she ran out of the house after receiving it.

  She came bearing food, which made me a happy man. To my surprise, she’d cooked baked chicken, green beans, and mac and cheese. For desert, Gauge had baked a chocolate cake. Baby girl was definitely bored out of her mind. Since I’d been knowing her, she hadn’t touched the stovetop. She was a hell of a baker, but I didn’t consider that actual cooking. At least that’s what my mother had told me as a kid.

  “G, why you didn’t tell me you knew how to cook?”

  “Why would I want to slave over the stove when you’re willing to have food catered or take me out to the finest diners where I can pig the hell out? That’s doing too much.” She chuckled. I missed that smile. I hadn’t seen it in forever, or so it seemed.

  “Good to know you only want a nigga because he feeds you good.”

  “Good dick and good food. Can’t beat that, Sos.”

  “Can I give you this good dick in the morning, G? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tired.”

  “Na, you can power up, take a nap or something. I’ll be up waiting when you get up. I’ve had a nap already, so I’m up for a minute.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” I replied sarcastically.

  “Real funny, Sosa.” Gauge rolled her eyes.

  “I’m just saying. You really think you running shit, huh?”

  “No. I just know that I have to remind you that you have a woman. You’ve went your whole life without worrying about a woman’s needs, so it is my job to keep you on your toes.”

  “Whatever. I’m not taking your little behind to no more restaurants. You can make yourself useful and get in this kitchen from now on. Let me remind you of your man’s needs.”

  “Whatever you want, Sosa.” Gauge cleared my plate and placed it in the sink.

  “Is that you being nice so that you can have your way with me tonight?”

  “You know me so well.” She blushed, her cheeks reddening and eyes batting.

  “Get ya ass up here, G. I’m tired. I give you permission to wake my ass up after eleven.”

  “I didn’t need your permission, baby. That was the plan anyway.”

  I never told her I loved her, ever. Even when I expressed the love I had for her, I couldn’t bring myself to tell her exactly how I felt. It was in the midst of my anger. But it was moments like this that made me want to remind her that I did. Because the words wouldn’t flow from my mouth, I grabbed her by the neck and tongued her down instead.

  “Come on, G.”

  We headed up the stairs where I shitted and showered as she watched, chatting away about her week without me, which sounded boring as shit. I understood why she was ready to see me. I was her entertainment. I gave her little ass something to do. By the time I was counting sheep, Gauge had succumbed to sleep as well. I guessed the nap she mentioned wasn’t much to rely on.

  “Yes… baby,” Millie whined. She nearly wanted to cry. The crackling of her voice tugged at my heartstrings, ones that were solely attached to her and the being that would be birthed in a few short months.

  Sleep had just overcome her, and I was waking her already. “I hate to wake you, but it’s time for me to go.” I rubbed her stomach in circular motions. The feeling was so soothing that it was coaching Millie right back into the slumber she’d been in. This wasn’t helping much in my situation.

  “You hear me, Mi?” I questioned, removing my hand from her stomach.

  “Yes… baby,” she repeated.

  “Open your eyes.”

  Utterly helpless in the situation, I was tempted to let her be. But I k
new that I’d be even more heavy-hearted if she wound up disappointed in my sudden departure. I wouldn’t hear or feel the end of her wrath for weeks. As mellow as baby girl was, she had a fierce mean streak that I steered clear of at all costs, even if that meant waking her after finally finding comfort to rest.

  “I can’t.” Millie groaned, a single tear falling from her right eye though she’d never opened it.

  I was regretting even coming up to bother her, but I didn’t want to hear the bickering later, so I did what I thought necessary. “I ain’t mean to wake you. Rest well, love. I’m out.” I stood from the bed.

  With her eyes still closed, she replied, “I’m sorry. I’m just tired.” Her whimpers were like daggers through my chest.

  3:52am.

  I clenched my pistol as I gained consciousness. It was after three in the morning when I arose again. Still, Gauge laid beside me, sound asleep. The dream I’d been having revisited me, waking me in the nick of time. The shit felt so real. I’d gained enough willpower to force myself awake before the craziness.

  Taking a peek at my slumbering love, I contemplated waking her with a dose of good dick but decided against it. There were a few things I needed to do before climbing back in bed. When I did, it would be to wake her with my tongue. It had been a minute since I tasted her sweetness, and I wouldn’t deprive myself any longer.

  I tossed on a pair of basketball shorts and a T-shirt. The air conditioner didn’t give a damn about me preferring to work in my boxers. When I reached my office, I flipped the light on and waited for it to illuminate the large space. It wasn’t often that I visited my office. There were people in place to handle my dealings. But since I’d had a target on my back, I’d seen the mahogany desk and cushioned chair more than I had since building my home four years prior.

  “Let’s see what you got going on,” I referred to Detective Shaw, who was over my case.

  The folder I’d taken from the stall was small, not very significant in size, but I was hoping it packed a punch. Confusion settled within me as I surveyed the outdated photos of Detective Shaw. She looked to be no older than sixteen or seventeen with a stomach that protruded. It was obvious that she was pregnant, but I wasn’t sure exactly what her pregnancy had to do with my investigation until I reached the final photo.

  I hadn’t formally met Gauge’s father, but I had seen several pictures of him. I’d seen enough to know that it was him standing beside Detective Shaw with his hands caressing her stomach. It was obvious that they were young and in love. The first document in the file was a birth certificate, absent of the birth mother’s name, yet Gregory Ellis Morrison was labeled as the biological father.

  I could feel steam radiating from my nostrils and ears as my chest began to burn. I continued flipping and reading the documents that Lancer had gotten ahold of. According to his observation, Destiny Shaw and Gregory Ellis Morrison had given life to a baby girl, Gauge Miliani Morrison, as teenagers. Destiny Shaw signed over her parental rights in the hospital. His lead ran cold, so he couldn’t exactly tell me what happened thereafter besides Gauge being raised by her father.

  The final few pages were more recent photos. There was one of Gauge’s mother at her high school graduation. There was another of Gauge’s mother at her college graduation. Lastly, there was one of Gauge and her mother standing side by side at Red Lobster in the dress that I’d purchased with the sparkly shit all over. It was the most recent.

  Sick was an understatement. I felt deathly ill. Beads of sweat began surfacing on my forehead as my throat dried and head began to throb. This shit couldn’t be true. I had been sleeping with the enemy.

  Anger overcame me as I pulled back the top drawer of my desk and retrieved one of the many Glocks I had stored around my crib. As I stood from my desk, the loud siren rocked me to my core. There were silent triggers that would alert me if anyone stepped into my yard unannounced. It was the same alarm that Gauge had triggered the night she’d come to my house without warning me.

  Immediately, I turned on the monitors in my office to see who was here to get their head blown from their shoulders. The sight before me wasn’t one I’d grown to anticipate. My legs locked and heart pumped at the sight of armed federal agents crawling through my yard.

  Springing into action, I ran into my bedroom and grabbed the single duffle that I’d need to carry with me. The sight of Gauge lying peacefully in my bed infuriated me. I couldn’t fight the urge to put her to rest permanently. Cocking my hammer back, I marched to her side of the bed and put it to her dome.

  She jumped from her sleep after feeling the pressure of my gun at the center of her head. “Sosa, what is going on?”

  “I loved you!” I admitted, emotions becoming too much to bare. For years, I’d kept my heart on a leash, and the minute I gave it up, I was played like some fucking fool. My pride wouldn’t let that shit go, not ever. So G had to go. The thought of it all caused an aching in my chest that couldn’t be explained.

  “Sosa! I love you too!”

  “She’s your mother. She sent you!”

  “Who sent me?”

  “Destiny Shaw.”

  “Sosa, what are you talking about?”

  “She’s after my freedom, and she sent you to help bring me in.”

  “No. My mother? I haven’t talked to her in forever, Sosa. My father raised me. I didn’t even have a clue that she was after you… that anyone was after you. I could’ve gotten this all worked out for you. For us.”

  The alarm continued blaring, but I heard every word she’d said. For some reason, I believed every one of them, but my trust had been altered. There was no way I could be sure if she was being honest.

  Boom!

  The sound of the agents trying to get through my door brought me back to reality. There was minimum time left for me to flee. I spared Gauge’s life. I had to. There wasn’t enough strength in me to pull the trigger. I’d bodied the toughest niggas, yet I couldn’t bring myself to kill baby girl. A life without me would be worse than death for her. This, I knew.

  “Sosa, come back!” she hollered as I backed away and ran out into the hallway.

  I didn’t worry about the stairs, deciding to jump over the banister to save myself time. Gauge’s footsteps could be heard coming down the steps as she continued screaming my name.

  “Come back to me!” she was adamant, catching up to me as I heard the windows to my home being shattered. “Come back to me!”

  For an entire year, I’d been perfecting my emergency escape. The door that was within my reach would secure the moment I was inside and closed it. There wasn’t any amount of force that would be able to reopen it. The door led to a thirty-mile-long tunnel, which would lead me to a secure location where a private jet would airlift me to my destination.

  Julio and his crew had been slaving to make this possible. It was the final piece to the puzzle I’d created, one that the government wouldn’t be able to solve with their smartest team members. It was a plan that once included Gauge, but it had been reduced to a one man’s show again.

  As I felt her tugging on my shirt, I realized it should’ve stayed that way. In the life that I lived, there was no room for love. There was no room for laws. There was no room for us.

  “Come back, Sosa, please.” Gauge was determined to slow me down, and she had.

  While she continued pulling at my shirt, I spun around and lifted my arms one by one, maneuvering the duffle as I went to come up out of the shirt altogether. Gauge went plummeting to the ground with a loud thud.

  “Sosa, no. Please, please don’t do this.”

  I never responded, too afraid that I would need more than a few seconds to spew the venom I wanted to pump into her. I’d given her my most valuable possessions—money and time. Yet I was the one left looking foolish. It wasn’t enough that I’d risked my sanity to fuck with her and keep her happy. She wanted my freedom too.

  I’d need a lifetime to help her understand the hatred that I’d bred for her.
There wasn’t a person I hated more on earth, not even her fucking mother. She’d hadn’t been the one to come into my life and make shit right. She’d didn’t brighten my dark ass days. She didn’t make me reconsider my train of thought. She hadn’t made me alter my ways. She hadn’t made me fall in love lawlessly and without shame.

  That was all on Gauge, the sick motherfucker who didn’t want to let me go even after she’d been caught. The damn girl was relentless, getting right back up after falling on her ass. But she wasn’t quick enough. By the time she reached me, there was an army of men and women behind her, yelling obscenities. Guns were drawn and ready to fire.

  I’d opened the door and stepped inside as I heard the voice of a woman demanding that the officers lower their weapons. It was Destiny Shaw, a woman who’d rubbed off on her child even though she hadn’t raised her. The two were the most relentless piece of shits that I’d ever encountered besides myself.

  “Gauge,” she spoke.

  “You did this! Make him come back!” Gauge yelled.

  She was closer. Close enough for me to smell the delicate fragrance she wore each day as I punched number after number into the keypad to seal the door.

  “Please. Come back to me!” She yelled as the door began to close.

  I didn’t want to care. I didn’t want to want her. I didn’t want to feel sympathy. But I couldn’t help myself. Her cries were torturous. Relief washed over me as the door met the opposite side of the tunnel. Freedom hadn’t evaded me, but heartbreak had caught up to me.

  “I’m pregnant!” Gauge bellowed in agony as I sealed the door behind me, causing my heart to stop.

  TO BE CONTINUED…

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