Spaces Between Notes

by Kristina M Sanchez

  Niko grimaced, glad he couldn’t talk back to his sister. He was getting pissed. He hadn’t realized Del was this upset, and he wasn’t pleased she was giving him such a thorough tongue-lashing in front of Carys.

  “And you.” Del whirled away from Niko to get in Micah’s face. The poor kid flinched backward. “What in the hell’s the matter with you? Leaving school over a guy? For fuck’s sake, Micah. What kind of melodramatic crap is that? School’s a good thing. We worked so hard to get you there.”

  Shame and misery painted Micah’s face as he ducked his head. Niko ran a hand through his hair, frustrated as per usual, and made a gesture at Jamie. Anytime, man.

  Jamie stepped up to the plate. “Del, really. It’s not like that all that. Micah was in a bad situation.”

  As Jamie explained why Micah had left school, how deep he’d gotten in with the wrong man, Carys stepped up to Niko’s side. She whistled lowly, near his ear, and rubbed his back. “I can see now why you didn’t want to tell her,” she said, gently teasing. “But she loves you naughty kiddos.”

  “Excuse me. Who are you?”

  Carys’s head snapped up, and then it was her shrinking back under Delilah’s glare. Niko might’ve smirked, let her see what it was like to be on the receiving end of Del’s wrath, but the situation wasn’t all that funny.

  “I don’t know you.” Del, who looked both angry and shaken after Jamie told her what had happened with Micah, made a visible effort to gentle her tone. “I’m sorry. I’m Delilah. These hooligans are my brothers.” She gestured at Niko and Micah.

  Niko went over to his sister and put a hand to her shoulder, squeezing it. She looked up at him, put a hand over his, and squeezed back. All forgiven.

  “I’m Carys,” Carys said, offering her hand as she sat across the table from Del. “Your brothers are doing some work for me on my house. Good work.”

  Del glanced up at Niko and then back at Carys. “Dad said something about you going on some kind of date.”

  Niko rolled his eyes. Across from him, Jamie and Micah smirked.

  Carys, though somewhat flustered, managed to recover. “Uh, yeah.” She wrinkled her nose. “It’s, uh…”

  “Complicated?”

  The two women laughed, and Niko could’ve groaned. This didn’t bode well for him.

  Sure enough, twenty minutes later, Chinese food had been ordered and Carys and Del were still sitting at the table, heads bent together, cackling. Admittedly, Carys was telling her a very entertaining story about her college days. Something about a statue and a prank gone wrong.

  “College always sounded like such fun to me,” Del said with a sigh. “It wasn’t even about the frat parties, though those sounded like fun.”

  Carys scoffed. “Sure, it was a lot of fun. There was a lot of barf involved at the parties. Not only your own, mind you. And hellacious mornings after. Both because of booze and boys and…”

  “Girls?” Del asked, waggling her eyebrows.

  Niko perked up.

  Carys made a face at him, but she answered Del. “I was actually out of college for my first girl-on-girl experience, thank you very much.”

  Niko’s eyebrows made for his hairline.

  Del threw her head back and laughed. “Look at you, defying the stereotypes.”

  Carys shrugged. “It wasn’t a big deal, really.” She waved a finger in Niko’s face. “And you’re not getting the story.”

  He put on an innocent expression as though he wasn’t already trying to figure out how to get her to give up the goods. She shook her head and turned back to his sister.

  “So college. You wanted to go and didn’t?”

  “I tried a couple of years ago.” Del rubbed her temple, her expression wistful. “Halfway through the semester, I got pregnant with Luca. Just not in the cards.”

  “What happened before that? If you don’t mind me asking.”

  “Mom always had her hands full with the twins. She worked all the damn time, and it took some doing to keep them on the straight and narrow, to make sure they got into college.” She fixed Micah with a look.

  Micah ducked his head, and Del sighed. She reached over and ruffled his hair. “Don’t worry about it, kiddo. It’s not the end of the world. Get back on your feet, and we’ll get you set up here. I’m a little worried about how Nia will do without you, but that’ll go however that goes.”

  “You’re not telling the whole story,” Jamie said. “Del could’ve gone to college. She and Niko were both smart enough to get in and get scholarships. They had enough money for one kid to go but not both. Del gave up her chance for Niko, which I’ve never thanked you for.”

  “Thanked me?” Del asked.

  “Yeah.” Jamie looked to Carys. “You’ve met Vincente.”

  Niko narrowed his eyes, but his best friend wasn’t looking at him. Where was he going with this?

  Carys scoffed. “Charmer, he was.”

  “Exactly, and that’s what this bastard had as an example.” Jamie clapped Niko’s shoulder. “Does a number on an impressionable young mind. So, as the gay best friend, thanks. The college experience and those sociology classes I dragged him to for his gen ed credits did a lot of good.”

  Niko waved his hand, exasperated. He was right there, for fuck’s sake. Jamie grinned unapologetically. “What? It’s true.”

  “See? This is why you can’t forget about college, Micah,” Del said.

  “What? Hey. I’m already gay. I don’t need to be taught not to bash myself. Thanks.”

  The Chinese food came, and they all settled down to eat. Del and Carys still had their heads bent together, which was weird for Niko because Del tended not to like his girlfriends. Not that Carys was his girlfriend, but close enough. And even though it was annoying that his sister felt the need to share some of his more embarrassing moments, having Carys and Del there in his house was nice.

  Really nice.

  “Hey, get over here.” Del pulled Niko into a hug before she left. “I like that one,” she said into Niko’s ear, speaking low enough the others couldn’t hear. “And you like her. I can see that. She can talk to you, which is weird and awesome. Whatever ‘it’s complicated’ means, uncomplicate it, huh?”

  Niko released his sister, giving her a glare that didn’t have as much heat as it could have. Uncomplicate it. Sure. Easy. Del had a sensible head on her shoulders, but every once in a while, her inner girly romantic slipped through.

  He looked over at Carys, and as though she felt his gaze, she looked up and smiled. Warmth rushed through his chest, and he felt the tug of want and desire even though he’d been inside her only hours before.

  Uncomplicate it? Whatever the hell that meant. Life and women just happened the way they happened. What was he supposed to do about it?

  That weekend, Niko was the last one to Carys’s house. He needed coffee, so he brought one of the travel carriers. It was one of those mornings.

  “Here’s the conundrum,” Jamie said as he poured coffee into his travel mug. “I see you failed to bring creamer. There’s some in the house, but do we dare interrupt the sibling showdown?”

  Niko raised his head, fighting a frown, and glanced in the window. Sure enough, he could see Carys and Bennett going at it, fingers flying and faces twisted. He waved a hand. What now?

  “Man, I have no idea. They were already arguing when we got here,” Micah said, coming up beside Jamie. He looked worried as he watched them. “He doesn’t look happy.”

  Niko had to struggle not to roll his eyes. For whatever insane reason, his little brother was smitten with Bennet. He hadn’t cottoned on to the fact the kid was railroading over his sister’s life in the name of his own happiness. And yeah, he understood Carys and their father had made Bennett the center of her world because it was all either of them knew, but fuck the hell out of that. How could Bennett not see what he was costing his sister? Or did he really not care?

  Jamie bumped his shoulder. “Hey, what’s up?”

 
That snapped Niko back to what he was supposed to be doing. He was here to work, and the family drama going on in the living room wasn’t his business. He snapped his fingers at his side and then pointed to their task for the day.

  It wasn’t his business, he told himself as Jamie and Micah argued the benefits of looking into the plumbing system before they tried to landscape the backyard. Carys was more than capable of handling her brother, and if she wanted to give up everything…

  He remembered the light in her eyes when she talked about the job they wanted her to do. She was so excited. He also remembered how quickly Carys had backed down each and every time her brother’s needs interfered with what she wanted.

  The idea of it happening again, of happening to this opportunity, was too much for him to handle. He had to do something.

  “Hey! Where are you going?” Micah called as he strode for the house.

  Niko didn’t turn around. He went inside and into the living room, where Carys was sitting and Bennett was standing. He was signing, and she was watching with a pained look on her face. He tried once more to tell himself it was none of his business, and he had no way of knowing if they were even talking about her leaving. It didn’t work. He went charging into the middle of the living room.

  Bennett, who had been leaning forward as he signed, took a few steps back. Carys straightened up from her slumped posture. Niko didn’t look at Bennett at all but at Carys. “What’s happening?” he signed.

  “Nik,” Carys said with a sigh. “It’s okay. We’re just talking.”

  “About…” Impatient, Niko huffed and made a motion with his hand like a plane flying away.

  “Yeah, but it’s okay. We—” Her eyes tracked to the side where Bennett had decided to rejoin the conversation. “He wants to listen in?” she translated for her brother. “That’s cute.”

  Bennett turned to Niko, his face twisted and furious. “This isn’t your business.”

  Niko gnashed his teeth. Bennett was right, but there was way too much he wanted to say to that statement. “Her life. Not you.”

  “What do you know about my life, a— Benny, come on.” Carys shook her head.

  Niko flashed a grin at Bennett. He knew what the sign for asshole looked like. He knew what all the name-calling signs looked like and showed Bennett that he couldn’t talk behind his back. “Asshole. Prick. Fucker. C-h-i-l-d.”

  “You’re both being children,” Carys said.

  “I’m the child?” Bennett sneered at him. The man did know how to make some god-awful faces. He pointed at Niko. “You’re worse than a baby. You can’t talk, and you feel so sorry for yourself, but you think you’re too good to sign? You make everyone come to you. Jamie and my sister have to grovel to King Asshole to make him feel better. Poor baby.”

  Despite himself, Niko flinched. Christ, he wanted his words. Even better, he wanted to make that smarmy fucker eat his.

  Carys put a hand on her brother’s arm and turned him to face her. “Benny, come on. Stop.” She signed the last word to emphasize.

  Reminding himself what he was here for, Niko breathed in through his nose, calming down, and waved his hand to get Bennett’s attention again. “A-b-o-u-t me, no. A-b-o-u-t you, no. A-b-o-u-t.” He pointed to Carys emphatically. “Her life.”

  To Niko’s everlasting irritation, Benny laughed. He looked to Carys and made a sign, and she made a face. Niko tapped her arm, looking at her for translation, but she hesitated.

  “You’re pathetic,” Bennett said, mimicking Niko’s stilted signing.

  Niko clenched his jaw, his hands flexing into fists by his side. He hoped like hell his cheeks weren’t as hot as they felt right then and considered walking away. He didn’t need this shit, to be made fun of by this prick.

  Before he could make a move though, Carys jumped up and he remembered what he’d said not ten seconds before. This wasn’t about him or Bennett. It was about her.

  “Benny—” she started, getting in her brother’s face.

  Niko put a hand to her shoulder and shook his head. He could fight his own battles. He wasn’t actually a baby. He took a deep breath knowing he was about to get very frustrated. “A-b-o-u-t me, no,” he repeated. “Her life. Her work. Big boy. You. Be okay. You. Let her have life. Think what she want. Want you, no.”

  Though his face was still twisted, Benny seemed struck by Niko’s words. He signed something directed at Niko.

  “Why is it your business?” Carys asked quietly, translating for Benny with a strange look on her face.

  Niko’s lips twitched. He considered a moment, but there were no other words. He patted his chest. “Care a-b-o-u-t happy.” He pointed at Bennett, putting a challenge into his gesture and his face. Do you, asshole?

  “Nik.” Carys took his hands.

  He pulled them away because he wasn’t done. There was some weird emotion growing at the center of his chest. It was part frustration, but it was more than that. He didn’t have enough words. Not nearly enough. He needed to be understood. This was important, and the urgency in him would not be quieted. “Happy,” he signed. “You.” She deserved to be happy, damn it.

  Her expression gentled, and she took his hands again and squeezed. “I hear you.” Another squeeze. “I’ll be okay.”

  He didn’t trust that, but what else could he do? He didn’t have the words to make a more persuasive argument. Taking care of her brother had been her purpose in life, and that was bullshit. Ultimately, though, Carys was going to do whatever felt right to her.

  She pressed a hand to his cheek. “Thank you,” she whispered, the words only for him. “Really.”

  Reluctantly, he walked away and left her to have a private conversation with her brother. He shouldn’t have been surprised to run into Micah and Jamie in the kitchen. Jamie was staring at him with a strange look that unnerved Niko. He rolled his shoulders and gestured with his chin. What?

  “Nothing,” Jamie said. He turned to the fridge and opened it. “I’m just getting cream so we can get our coffee on. Coffee is fuel. Let’s get to work.”

  That was exactly what they did. Though he tried not to, Niko kept glancing at the door, but it was an hour before anything happened.

  Bennett came storming out and pounded down the stairs. He headed down the street on foot, and Niko wanted to cheer. If he was that upset, Carys must’ve stuck to her guns. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Micah take a step forward as though he wanted to go after him.

  Niko was about to shoo Micah in Bennett’s direction when he was distracted by the side door opening. Carys stepped outside, and Niko smiled. His smile faded when he saw the tension radiating off her. She stood for a moment, looking after her brother’s rapidly retreating figure with her arms crossed and a pale, an unhappy look on her face.

  Rather than go after Bennett, which he’d fully expected her to do, Carys sighed and turned away. She looked to him, and her eyes lit up even if her smile was a little wan.

  The sight of that small smile calmed the nerves Niko hadn’t realized until that moment were roiling in his gut. He dropped his tools and moved toward her before he had a chance to think about what he was doing.

  “What the heck is going on?” Micah said, coming up beside Niko.

  Carys’s eyes didn’t leave Niko’s while she answered. “I’m going to France for six months. For work.”

  “Whoa,” Micah said, and Niko thought he heard Jamie gasp. Hearing confirmation of what he’d hoped, Niko beamed. He was proud of her, because he knew it must’ve been hard for her to tell her brother no for once in his spoiled brat life.

  At his grin, her cheeks tinted pink and her smile widened. It was impossible not to notice the warmth in his chest when she looked at him like that. Like it didn’t matter that Jamie and Micah were there because she only saw him. The idea made his chest ache but not in a bad way. “Good,” he signed and reached out to take her hand.

  “Wait. Is this a good thing?” Micah asked. “Why is Benny so upset?”


  Carys grimaced, and Niko could’ve kicked his little brother for taking her beautiful smile away. “I’ve never left him for so long, and he hasn’t found an interpreter he likes,” she said.

  “Oh.” Micah rubbed the back of his head, looking toward the street even though Bennett wasn’t visible anymore. “Well, that’s hard, but that’ll be okay. Doesn’t he know we’ll help him?” He glanced at Niko and scoffed. “Well, Jamie and I would. Or just me. Whatever. I’m around, you know?”

  If it hadn’t been because of Bennett, watching Micah get flustered might’ve been cute. Niko glanced at Carys and saw that the idea of leaving her little brother alone with his little brother didn’t sit well with her. Again, he felt a flash of annoyance but tugged on her hand. “Good.”

  After a moment’s hesitation, she took a deep breath and nodded. “Good,” she agreed and smiled at him. “Maybe having to rely on the interpreter service instead of me will show him it’s not as bad as he makes it out. He’ll be fine.”

  “It might be good for both of you to see,” Jamie said, coming up on Niko’s other side. “The kid’s used to you always being there when he calls.”

  “Yeah,” Carys said, ducking her head. She looked up, not at Jamie but at Niko, and there was something in her eyes he couldn’t read. “A little bird told us it was time for him to grow up.”

  “France for six months, and you get paid to be there? That sounds great, hon. Congratulations,” Jamie said.

  “Thanks.” Carys looked to Jamie, though her fingers tightened around Niko’s. “Hey, you think maybe you and Micah could, I don’t know, take an early and extended lunch? I need to talk to Niko for… a bit.”

  Her voice was soft and steady, but for all that her words were innocent, they sent a thrill straight down Niko’s spine. He had no context to base it on, but his body was under the impression he was about to get laid.