Loving Liberty

by Belinda Boring

  “Ready?” he asked, brushing his hair away from his face, aware I was checking him out. His hand beckoned for me to approach and I let out a soft sigh. He stepped away from the table, waiting for me to come stand in front of him, sandwiched between him and the table. “I’m going to have you break, okay?” He moved in closer and I prayed my legs wouldn't give out. I could feel every inch of him pressed against me.

  “Okay,” I stammered. Oliver chuckled low in my ear and I tried not to shiver from the sensation. Bending me forward with his body, he showed me how to position the stick, his arm alongside mine. We fit perfectly.

  “Still with me, Liberty?” he asked. I didn't want to move. We were so connected, the position so intimate, I was sure I’d melt on the spot. Andrew had tried holding me this close and all it did was make my skin crawl. It was the complete opposite with Oliver. This made me feel reckless.

  Praise for Loving Liberty

  "Belinda Boring has captured one of the truest books I have read to date. This book can help so many young girls realize they are not alone out there."

  ~ Lisa Markson, The Paranormal Bookworm

  “Belinda Boring has created one of those books where words are power. The power to encourage us in our generation like the great classics did in theirs.”

  ~ Brenda Anderson, Naughty Bits Book Reviews.

  “I laughed, cried, swooned, screamed, you name it. Most of all, I learned. Learned that you are the one person who can make your life yours.”

  ~ Christina Silcox, Literary Redemption.

  “The story personally touched me and I never related so much to a book the way I did with this one.”

  ~ Jessica Johnson, Bookend 2 Bookend.

  "This book made me laugh and it made me cry. It made me believe in the power of friendship and how love can change your life."

  ~ Jaime Cross, Kaina’s Book Blog.

  ”Hooked from page one, I could feel the raw emotions of the characters in every word the author wrote.”

  ~ Diana Jacobsen, Diana’s Lagniappe Books.

  “Can I just say WOW? Loving Liberty will take you on an emotional ride that will resonate long after the last page is turned.”

  ~ Cecilia Jansink, Confessions of a Booky Monster.

  “Kudos to Belinda Boring! She's woven a lifelike tale of love and respect that will keep readers captivated!”

  ~Lacey Weatherford, USA Today Bestselling Author of the Crush series.

  “Belinda Boring has done it again, with perfect dialogue and characters you can't help but fall in love with and care about.”

  ~ Heather Gunter, Author of Love Notes.

  “Whoa! How in the world can a book be so sexy without the sex? It baffles my mind but it's possible. Trust me, it just happened!

  ~ Lauren Reidy, A Little Bit of R&R.

  “I don't even know how to put into words how amazing this book is. I couldn't put this book down.”

  ~ Amy Chris, Weet Weet’s Bookshelf

  “Loving Liberty is a must read that will pull you into Liberty's world and run you through an emotional rollercoaster of love, hate, anger, sadness and even some laugh out loud moments.”

  ~ Tiffany Riach, Book Infatuations.

  “This is a book that will stick with you and make you appreciate life and all the choices it brings.”

  ~ Whitney Baer, Reader’s Candy.

  “This wonderful book has so many emotions running through it that you are bound to be captivated by every word.”

  ~ Kim Walker, Bawaka’s Book Fair.

  “Loving Liberty teaches us that we can’t always be what others want us to be . . . we can only be the best version of ourselves and that is good enough.”

  ~ Jessica Gibson, Author of the Boston Witch series.

  “Loving Liberty is emotional, heartbreaking, and inspiring. It is a story full of rules, restrictions, and fear, but then the author does something amazing. She breaks the rules, and in doing so, gives readers a tale full of courage, self-reliance, and confidence.”

  ~ R.K. Ryals, bestselling author of the Redemption series.

  “Thank you, Belinda Boring, for this heart clenching, soul capturing story that has become my favorite YA story of the year!!"

  ~ Jenny Bynum, Black Words, White Pages.

  “This is a heartwarming, captivating story about the power of one young woman to change her life and find love along the way. Brava, Belinda!”

  ~ Lizzy Ford, bestselling author of the Witchling series.

  “Loving Liberty will definitely be a read that makes the literary world shine more brightly. Amazing just doesn’t seem adequate enough to describe this wonderful book filled with raw emotions.”

  ~ Derinda Love, author of Today Only.

  “Belinda gives us an inspiring coming of age story teaching us that just one person can make a difference and that with their faith and belief in us we truly are strong enough to become the person we've always wanted to be.”

  ~ Holly Malgieri, I Love Indie Books.

  "Belinda Boring has shown us that even when you feel that there is no hope, there is always help out there. All you need is to believe in yourself.”

  ~ Sue Ellen Robertson, Girly Girl Book Reviews.

  “Belinda has the ability to put the reader right into her stories.”

  ~ Cindy Mucha Barton, I Pimp My Authors.

  “I loved the fact that this wasn't a story about a knight in shining armor coming to the rescue of the damsel in distress, but rather the story of a really great (and sexy!) guy helping the girl he cares for find the confidence she needs to be and have what she wants.”

  ~ Tawnya Peltonen, One More Chapter.

  “When you start reading this book, make sure you have plenty of time set aside to read because you will NOT want to put this book down!”

  ~ Sue Brooks, Mommy Reads Too Much

  “I can't imagine anyone not falling for the innocence, romance, and incredible hardship and bravery found in these pages. I just can't express enough how amazed I was by Loving Liberty.”

  ~ Alana Rock, The Book Pimp.

  Loving Liberty

  “What will she be willing to risk for freedom?”

  Belinda Boring

  Dedication

  To Jessica Johnson,

  Your friendship is an inspiration.

  To my fellow survivors,

  When all is said and done, the opinions of others mean nothing. We are beautiful. We are strong. We are powerful. And yes, the world is ours to conquer and enjoy!

  This story is for us.

  Acknowledgments

  “I have not ceased being fearful, but I have ceased to let fear control me. I have accepted fear as a part of life — specifically the fear of change, the fear of the unknown; and I have gone ahead despite the pounding in my heart that says: turn back, turn back, you'll die if you venture too far.” — Erica Jong

  Writing Loving Liberty became one of those life experiences that will forever stay in my memory. What started as a simple love story morphed into a powerful reminder that anything is possible if you have the courage to not only believe in yourself, but also put that faith into action. Life throws us many challenges—curve balls to undermine our confidence and convince us that our dreams are unreachable. The trick is to keep getting up, dusting ourselves off, and saying in a loud voice, “I can do this. I will do this. I am amazing.”

  As with any project, there are always people in the background who make invaluable contributions. I am surrounded by some of the greatest people—friends who helped me realize that the past no longer holds me in its power and that I can bravely face my future because there’s nothing holding me back:

  To my beloved Lisa, Jessica, and Christina—you kept me laughing when my heart hurt, wiped my te
ars when it became hard to distinguish between Liberty and myself, and were always ready to pick up the pitchforks to attack Andrew. Douchecanoe is my favorite new word! Thank you for EVERYTHING you do. I love you <3

  To Jessica Gibson—I’m so glad you didn’t have to come to my house and “cut me” like you threatened! Your daily messages, filled with encouragement, meant so much and I loved Facetiming you to brainstorm. Our friendship is one I will cherish for the rest of my life . . . Yep; I said life, because you are STUCK with me!

  To Susan McCray—Your hugs were absolute lifesavers! You were always there and I loved having you part of this fun ride. I value your opinion—both as a friend and writing partner!

  To Christina Racich—You were the perfect inspiration behind Molly and I hope I did you justice. It just goes to show, that it doesn’t matter where we are in the world; when we’re meant to meet someone and develop a friendship, it’ll happen. Thank you for helping me with my Seattle research, for making me laugh with how much you want Colin Wayne to be Blake, and for the legendary phrase SUCK A DUCK. You are amazing!

  To Lacey Weatherford—Thank you for reminding me that even though the emotions felt real, my past is truly in the past and no longer able to control me. You were one of the first to believe and look at me now *winks* I AM a Rock Star … with a Rock Star BFF!

  To Regina Wamba—Oh. My. Gosh. You gave me the PERFECT cover for this story, totally cementing my belief that you are a genius when it comes to cover art. It’s always been my hope that each story I write be beautiful on the inside AND outside . . . a complete swoon worthy package. Thank you for making that a reality!

  To Kim Swain—I am beyond grateful to have you as my editor. Not only do you make my stories shine and leave ‘love note’ comments, each book has been a positive experience that’s built my confidence as a writer. That means more than you’ll ever know. Thank you!

  To my husband, Mark—Thank you for being my Oliver. You showed me the same kind of love that gave me the courage to take risks and be myself. You are the inspiration behind every hero I write. I love you. Always and forever.

  Last, but not least, my heart felt thank you to everyone else. To each person who helped make this story come to life. To those whose encouragement, friendship, and comments make me smile and laugh. You are all so important to me—don’t ever forget it. You matter. You are appreciated.

  Writing a story is a labor of love, more so when the writer includes personal experiences and emotions. They do it because that part of them needs a voice—a way to empower themselves and hopefully, strike a chord within the reader. I love my life with all its ups and downs. Thank you for choosing to read Loving Liberty. I hope it touches your heart the way it has mine.

  Be brave. Have faith. Take risks.

  It really is worth it.

  Bels

  Chapter One

  I looked with longing, my sole focus on the people sitting at the neighboring table.

  There was nothing special about them, just a small group of young adults, like me; but they represented a world I desperately wanted to be part of. We were all here, with our families, to raise money for the latest popular charity. Our similarly styled clothes screamed “upper class”, suggesting we shared things in common. Most ran in the same social circle, but that wasn’t what I envied about them.

  They looked as though they were happy, enjoying the kind of life where they were free to come and go as they chose. Laughing openly, there wasn’t any fear of reprisal or condemnation when their loud behavior drew attention. The group was having an amazing time, and I couldn’t help feeling the pangs of jealousy.

  It’s what I wanted more than anything in the world—the ability to act without fear of disappointing my parents. The chance to let simply loose and be myself with no restrictions, stern warnings, or lectures about how proper young women should act in public.

  I was twenty-one years old and the perfect model of who my parents believed I should be. From my well-maintained blonde hair, always immaculate without a misplaced strand, to the expensive clothes, making me feel like a Stepford wife-in-training, I had been groomed, from an early age, for this life of wealth and privilege.

  And I hated it.

  What I wanted to do was stand on top of the table I was sitting at, throw my head back and scream, “My name is Liberty Montgomery and I want more!” I would ignore the horrified stares and hushed whispers, not caring about the backhanded snickers or judgmental comments. I wanted to break free of the cage I felt trapped in. Even knowing it would disappoint my parents didn’t bother me.

  But that would be a lie, wouldn’t it? There were only so many times I could fool myself before the truth surfaced. I was a people pleaser—born and bred. Every time I saw my mother’s lips purse in censure, I cringed.

  My imagination ran wild with all the criticisms that would be surging through her mind, if I did, though. There was no doubt she would be stockpiling them until we were within the safety of our home, where privacy would afford her the luxury to speak her mind. She would never openly berate me in public; it wasn’t something refined families did. She would simply wait and then together, with my father, tag-team me. I was lucky to usually emerge from those types of discussions with my spirit unscathed.

  My father was the type of man you would rather die than upset. He demanded excellence from everyone, and that didn’t exclude his daughter. If anything, he expected more of me; and his brand of perfection was exhausting to maintain. I did it because I love him, working hard to avoid hearing him say my name as though it pained him. My entire life revolved around trying to earn his respect and affection.

  Staring over at the loud crowd, I knew if I joined them, I would only gain his displeasure.

  I was trapped.

  I let out a heavy sigh, reining in my thoughts. It didn’t help to wish for things I couldn’t have. My regimented upbringing, the restrictions I sometimes railed against, was just as much my fault as my parents’. I didn’t have to be the dutiful daughter. I could rebel at any time, declare the need to be my own person and tell them, “no”.

  I didn’t, though.

  As each year passed, I kept willing myself to speak up, but old habits die-hard.

  One day, I whispered, taking a small sip of sparkling water. It was difficult not to flinch as I swallowed the disgusting beverage. My mother was adamant that all young ladies should drink it. I eyed the drinks at the other table, knowing they’d been bought at the bar. Occasionally, I was permitted a small flute of champagne, but never outside our home and never interesting cocktails like they’d ordered. Looking at my half emptied glass in disgust, I placed it down beside the name cardholder.

  Only two more hours of scrutiny and you can go home. I could fake it as long as I needed. It was something I’d perfected over the years.

  “Can I get you anything? Another drink, maybe?” A deep voice interrupted my musings, dragging my gaze upward. I tried not to gasp out loud as I stopped at the most beautiful blue eyes I’d ever seen. The server caught me by surprise and my fingers instinctively reached up to fidget with my string of pearls.

  If I thought his eyes were striking, they only complimented the rest of him. The name badge on his shirt said Oliver and I couldn’t stop staring at how perfect his mouth was—the way it raised a little higher to the right side. With dimples on each side of his cheeks, he was, by far, the most handsome guy in the room.

  He didn’t say another word, tilting his head slightly, his smile growing wider by the second. That’s when I realized he was waiting for my answer. I’d been too busy noticing his light brown hair was spiked up at the ends and how broad his shoulders were. He wasn’t the first good-looking guy I’d ever seen, but his unwavering focus did something funny to my stomach. Oliver had rendered me completely speechless and I felt like an idiot.

  He is the only one that makes you forget you manners. Answer him before he walks away!

  “Sorry.” I could feel my face heat and turn
about a hundred shades of red. “I’m good for right now,” I continued, chewing on my bottom lip. “Thanks, though.”

  “Are you sure? I can get you something other than what you’re already drinking.” He gestured to the glass. His offer was incredibly tempting.

  “I am. Sparkling water suits me just fine.” To prove my point, I took a mouthful. It wasn’t my customary sip and it took everything I had not to spit it out.

  “Do you usually gag when you drink water?” He was teasing me, flashing another lopsided grin. My stomach did flip flops, my heart racing a little, as well.

  “I don’t know what you . . .” I paused as he cocked his eyebrow. Glancing around to see if my family was close, I didn’t bother hiding my shudder. “Who am I kidding? This stuff is nasty.” I pushed it away.

  “Well, I have this strict policy that I never let pretty girls drink things that make them cringe. So please, for me, is there anything else I can get you? Maybe something from the bar?”

  Wishing I had the courage to say “yes”, I shook my head, instead. The different mixed drinks were definitely enticing; but without knowing their names, I didn’t want to appear stupid. “No, it’s okay. I’ll stick with this.”

  Oliver gave me a curious look, opening his mouth slightly, like he wanted to push the issue but changed his mind. There was no way I wanted this gorgeous guy to discover he was talking with a good girl who did everything she was told. Even though the chances were I’d never see him again, the idea of him out there in the world knowing how sheltered I was, bothered me.

  It bothered me a lot.

  “Even though it breaks my heart, I’ll concede, just this once.” He placed his hand over his heart, giving me a crushed expression. “You enjoy your evening, Miss?”

  It took me a second to realize he was asking for my name. I flushed again, knowing I’d been caught staring at his lips, wondering what it would be like to kiss them.

  “Liberty. My name’s Liberty Montgomery.”

  “It’s a pleasure meeting you, Liberty.” He bowed slightly, his hands tucked behind his back. “Mine’s Oliver Nichols. If you need me for anything, just let me know.” The flirtatious wink he gave turned my insides upside down.