The Blooming of a Lotus
Page 10
birthless
Smiling to the birthless nature of my
Smiling
consciousness, I breathe out.
12.
Seeing the deathless nature of my
Consciousness
consciousness, I breathe in.
deathless
Smiling to the deathless nature of my
Smiling
consciousness, I breathe out.
This exercise goes along with the preceding exercises, and its aim is to help us look deeply into the true nature of all things. The phenomenal world seems to be marked by oppositions: birth/death, coming/going, being/nonbeing, one/many, defilement/purity, and so on. Mindful meditation enables us to see beyond such notions as these. The three seals of Buddhist teaching are impermanence, selflessness, and nirvana. Because things are impermanent and without a self, we say that they are born and die, come and go, still exist or no longer exist, are one or many, are defiled or pure. But Buddhism does more than reveal the phenomenal aspect of reality; it puts us in touch with the true nature (in Sanskrit, svabhāva) of phenomena. That true nature is nirvana. Nirvana cannot be described by means of either/or concepts. Nirvana means the putting to rest of all oppositional terms and notions. It also means the putting to rest of afflictions like desire, hatred, and ignorance, which are born from these notions.
In the Udāna (Words of Uplift), Buddha speaks of nirvana in the following way (let us be very careful not to be caught in words and ideas because the Buddha has also taught that it is impossible to say anything about the true nature of nirvana): “Monks, there is a place which is not the place of earth, water, air, or fire, limitless space or limitless consciousness, limitless non-materiality, perceptions or no perceptions, this world or that world. I do not talk about this place as coming and going or not coming and not going, as being born and dying. This place does not come into existence or pass away and it does not need to rely on something else. It is the ending of all sorrow. It is nirvana.” And again in the Udāna: “Monks, there is something which is not born, which is not conditional, which does not become, is not made, is not a composite. Supposing that this nonborn, nonconditional, not-become, not made, not compounded is not there? How could there be a place for the born, the conditional, the becoming, the made, the compounded to return to?’’
Suppose that while we are listening to the Buddha speaking like this, we are caught in the words, “There is a place which . . . This place.” Then there will be no way we shall be able to understand because the reality of nirvana goes beyond all ideas of is or is not, one or many, place and no place, this and that. This exercise uses the image of a wave and the water as a metaphor for nirvana. The wave is birth and death; the water is nirvana. The wave is born and dies, rises and falls, is high and is low, comes to be and passes away, is many and is one. This is not true of the water in the wave. We should remember that this is only a metaphor. In our common perception, water still belongs to the phenomenal world, like clouds, vapor, ice, and snow. Because we are able to look deeply at the phenomenal world, we are able to discover its birthless and deathless nature and to enter the world of suchness. In Buddhist studies, we talk about the process of going from the mark (laksana) to the nature (svabhāva), from the sign to the essence.
A bodhisattva is able to see the nature of all that is and therefore is no longer afraid and no longer desires to hold on. Thus she can ride on the waves of birth and death with complete equanimity.
Exercise Ten
Looking Deeply
1.
Aware of my body, I breathe in.
Aware of body
Smiling to my body, I breathe out.
Smiling
2.
Aware that this body is not me,
Body not me
I breathe in.
Aware that no self owns this body,
No self owns body
I breathe out.
3.
Aware of a feeling present now,
Aware of feeling
I breathe in.
Smiling to this feeling, I breathe out.
Smiling
4.
Aware that this feeling is not me,
Feeling not me
I breathe in.
Aware that no self owns this feeling,
No self
I breathe out.
owns feeling
5.
Aware of a perception present now,
Aware of
I breathe in.
perception
Smiling to this perception,
Smiling
I breathe out.
6.
Aware that this perception is not me,
Perception not me
I breathe in.
Aware that no self owns this
No self owns
perception, I breathe out.
perception
7.
Aware of a mental formation
Aware of
present now, I breathe in.
mental formation
Smiling to this mental formation,
Smiling
I breathe out.
8.
Aware that this mental formation
Mental formation
is not me, I breathe in.
not me
Aware that no self owns this
No self owns
mental formation, I breathe out.
mental formation
9.
Aware of consciousness being present,
Aware of
I breathe in.
consciousness
Smiling to this consciousness,
Smiling
I breathe out.
10.
Aware that this consciousness is
Consciousness
not me, I breathe in.
not me
Aware that no self owns this
No self owns
consciousness, I breathe out.
consciousness
11.
Knowing I am not limited by
I not limited
this body, I breathe in.
Knowing this body is not limited
Body not limited
by my life span, I breathe out.
12.
Knowing that this body as five
Body birthless,
aggregates is birthless and
deathless
deathless, I breathe in.
Knowing that I am also birthless
I birthless, deathless
and deathless, I breathe out.
13.
Smiling to the birthlessness
Smiling to
and deathlessness of this body,
birthless, deathless
I breathe in.
body
Smiling to the birthlessness
Smiling to
and deathlessness of this self,
birthless, deathless
I breathe out.
self
This exercise helps us to look deeply at the nature of selflessness. The body and the other bases of perception (eyes, ears, nose, tongue, and mind) are not the self. Nor do they belong to a self that lies outside them. The five aggregates are the body, the feelings, the perceptions, mental formations, and consciousness. These five aggregates are not the self, and they are also not the property of a self that exists apart from them. Self is often defined as a changeless entity existing independently from so-called non-self entities. Buddhism teaches that there is no such self because, in reality, there is nothing changeless that can exist independently of all else. What, then, is the meaning of the words “I” and “self” in exercise ten, and to what do they refer? Obviously “I” here refers to the person who is meditating, who is a compound of the five aggregates. The five aggregates are themselves a river of constantly transforming phenomena, which are not separate entities. If we understand that, then there is nothing wrong with the use of the word “I.�
�� If our minds are open to the fact that self is made of non-self elements, we can use the expression “self” without fear—like Buddha when he asked Ananda: “Do you wish to come to Vulture Peak with me?”
The wrong views of self can be enumerated as follows:
1. The body is the self (Satkāyadrsti).
2. The body is not the self, but it belongs to the self.
3. The body is in the self, and the self is in the body.
4. The body is not the self, but it is also not something independent of the self.
5. The world is the self, the self is the world.
It is important to remember that we meditate on no-self in order to uproot the idea of a permanent and changeless self-substance, not to establish a theory of nihilism. Eternalism and nihilism are both wrong views, traps that the Buddha taught his disciples to avoid. The view of permanence (Pali sassata-ditthi) and the view that nothing is (Pali uccheda ditthi) are the basis of all wrong thinking. If we are able to go beyond these two extremes, we can freely and as we please use the word “I,” just as the Buddha used “This body is not me” or “I am not this body.” To identify self with the world is also a confused notion if it means we are caught in “eternalist” or nihilistic thinking: “I am the universe. As long as the universe is there, I continue to exist. When the universe is not there, I cease to exist.” This is not so, for, truly, reality is birthless and deathless, without self and without other. It does not come and does not depart. It is only by realizing this reality that we can destroy the wrong view of self. Those who simply repeat over and over again “no self” as a religious doctrine have probably lost their way and entered the view of nihilism.
Exercise Eleven
Being in Touch, Looking Deeply
1.
In touch with the flower, I breathe in.
Flower
In touch with the scent and the beauty
Beauty and scent
of the flower, I breathe out.
2.
In touch with the sun in the flower,
Sun in the flower
I breathe in.
Knowing that without the sun there
Without sun
would be no flower, I breathe out.
no flower
3.
In touch with the cloud in the flower,
Cloud in the flower
I breathe in.
Knowing that without the cloud there
Without cloud
would be no flower, I breathe out.
no flower
4.
In touch with the earth in the flower,
Earth in the flower
I breathe in.
Knowing that without the earth there
Without earth
would be no flower, I breathe out.
no flower
5.
In touch with the air in the flower,
Air in the flower
I breathe in.
Knowing that without the air there
Without air
would be no flower, I breathe out.
no flower
6.
In touch with space in the flower,
Space in
I breathe in.
the flower
Knowing that without space there
Without space
would be no flower, I breathe out.
no flower
7.
In touch with consciousness in
Consciousness
the flower, I breathe in.
in the flower
Knowing that without consciousness
Without
there would be no flower,
consciousness
I breathe out.
no flower
8.
Knowing that the flower manifests
Flower from
from the six elements, I breathe in.
six elements
Smiling to the six elements in the
Smiling
flower, I breathe out.
9.
Seeing the impermanence of the
Flower
flower, I breathe in.
impermanent
Seeing the flower on the way to
Flower turning
the garbage, I breathe out.
into garbage
10.
In touch with the garbage,
Garbage
I breathe in.
In touch with the impurity
Impurity
and smell of garbage, I breathe out.
and smell
11.
In touch with the garbage arising
Garbage from
from the six elements, I breathe in.
six elements
Smiling to the six elements in the
Smiling
garbage, I breathe out.
12.
Seeing the impermanence of the
Garbage
garbage, I breathe in.
impermanent
Seeing the garbage on the way to
Garbage turning
the flower, I breathe out.
into flower
13.
In touch with the cloud in the garbage,
Cloud in
I breathe in.
the garbage
Knowing that without the cloud
Without cloud
there would be no garbage,
no garbage
I breathe out.
14.
In touch with the earth in the garbage,
Earth in
I breathe in.
the garbage
Knowing that without the earth there
Without earth
would be no garbage, I breathe out.
no garbage
15.
In touch with the air in the garbage,
Air in the garbage
I breathe in.
Knowing that without the air there
Without air
would be no garbage, I breathe out.
no garbage
16.
In touch with space in the garbage,
Space in
I breathe in.
the garbage
Knowing that without space there
Without space
would be no garbage, I breathe out.
no garbage
17.
In touch with consciousness in
Consciousness
the garbage, I breathe in.
in the garbage
Knowing that without consciousness
Without
there would be no garbage,
consciousness
I breathe out.
no garbage
This exercise helps us see the interdependent arising and nonduality of all that is. Interdependent arising is described in the Avatamsaka sutra as interbeing and interpenetration. We must learn to see the one in the many and the many in the one. Nonduality means that there are not two, but it does not mean that there is only one. The notion one always goes with the notion two and the notion many. In comprehending interbeing and nonduality, we will be able to transform our anxieties and fears and to dissolve the barriers of perception that are formed by our habits of conceptualizing and discriminating. The boundaries between birth and death, being and nonbeing, defilement and purity will be erased, and we will be able to live without fear in the freedom of limitless space.
Exercise Twelve
Looking Deeply
1.
Aware of myself as a collection
Myself as
of five aggregates, I breathe in.
five aggregates
Seeing the five aggregates rooted in
Roots in
all that is, I breathe out.
all that is
2.
Aware of myself as made up of
Myself made of
what is not myself (vapor, w
ater, air,
nonself elements
ancestors, habits, society, economics),
I breathe in.
Seeing that my everyday perception
Separate entity,
of myself as a separate entity
erroneous
is in error, I breathe out.
perception
3.
Aware of the human species as an
Humans
animal species though it has a culture
one animal species
and has become sovereign of the earth,
I breathe in.