The SPEED of Trust: The One Thing that Changes Everything

by Stephen M. R. Covey

  As one example, English had almost immediately become the official business language for the company. While this made it easier for the Western colleagues from the U.S. and Europe, who were used to speaking rapidly and with American slang, it created a significant challenge for some of their Eastern colleagues whose English abilities at the time were very limited. With encouragement and consideration, the Western executives intentionally began to speak more slowly to their Eastern counterparts and to really listen to understand. This simple show of respect made an enormous difference in their interactions as Chinese executives developed their English abilities and Western executives began to understand the rich culture they were becoming part of. It also earned significant trust dividends as Lenovo soon became the #1 PC maker in the world and has continued to be a global market leader in computer hardware and innovation.

  DEMONSTRATING RESPECT AT HOME

  At home, the “little things” are even more important. Simply saying “please” or “thank you,” sincerely listening to someone, cleaning up after yourself, sharing the remote, or surprising someone with flowers or some other token of love make huge deposits in family Trust Accounts.

  Growing up, I remember my mom and dad taking their daily half-hour ride around the neighborhood on a Honda trail bike so they could have special private time together to talk. I remember how family members would often stop and greet me with warmth and love when I walked through the front door. I remember times when my mom or dad would tell all of us to work really hard to surprise the other parent by cleaning up the kitchen, the garage, or the yard before the other one got home, and what fun it was to see the surprise and appreciation on that parent’s face. In my own home, I remember how my little preschool-age daughter’s eyes would light up when her older teenage brother would take her for rides on the four-wheeler in our backyard, or how they would shine when he would dress up like a prince to join the “princess” for a tea party on the floor.

  I know firsthand what a difference those “little things” can make! As the Dalai Lama put it, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

  The end result of kindness is that it draws people to you.

  —ANITA RODDICK, FOUNDER, THE BODY SHOP

  However, I also know that seemingly little demonstrations of disrespect can lead to the bigger withdrawals that ultimately wipe those Trust Accounts right out. As one publication on abuse points out:

  The beginnings of both spouse and child abuse can be found in seemingly insignificant things, such as belittling the abilities and competency of another, constantly criticizing, being insulting or calling names, refusing to communicate, manipulating, causing guilt feelings, repeatedly making and breaking promises, intimidating, threatening physical harm, making unfounded accusations, or destroying property.

  In a popular culture of television, music, books, and movies that often reflect, laugh at, and even elevate disrespectful attitudes and little abusive behaviors, it’s easy to become numb to the effects they have on the relationships that mean the most. We must never forget that—for good or ill—the “little” things are the big things at home.

  THE BOTTOM LINE

  While Demonstrate Respect may come across as a “soft” behavior to some, I contend that it absolutely has a direct relationship to trust and therefore to the bottom line.

  Think back to some of the research I’ve shared in this book. Why is it that only 29 percent of employees believe that management cares about them developing their skills? Why is it that only 42 percent believe that management cares about them at all? In too many cases, though management might talk about it, fundamentally, management does not behave in ways that demonstrate respect, and as a result, employees don’t trust management.

  What creates trust, in the end, is the leader’s manifest respect for the followers.

  —JAMES O’TOOLE, AUTHOR OF LEADING CHANGE

  And what is the impact on speed and cost? When employees believe their managers really don’t care, how willing are they to give their best? To be innovative? To collaborate? On the other hand, how quick are employees to complain, criticize, unionize, and strike?

  From the perspective of the customer, Demonstrate Respect has a huge impact. Several years ago, there was a fierce competition among real-estate agents to represent the developer in the sale of some exclusive home sites near Park City, Utah. The 4,000-acre parcel involved had been owned by a sheep-ranching family since pioneer days.

  The developer invited several of the top real-estate agents in Park City to make presentations. Among them was Tom Peek, who made his presentation pretty much the same as everyone else. However, Tom did one thing that was distinctly different. He sent a handwritten thank-you note to the developer for the opportunity to be considered. The developer said that that one act clinched the choice for him. For Tom, sending the thank-you note was a natural thing to do. He said, “It is important to show respect to others and think of them when you are not there.”

  This development, named The Colony, became the largest ski-in and ski-out development in North America, with minimum four-acre lots and homes of up to 30,000 square feet. And Park City became one of the sites of the 2002 Winter Olympics.

  There are countless examples of economic choices that are made based on a (sometimes small) demonstration of concern. People in advertising know this, and they often seek to convince consumers that the production of a particular product is a demonstration of concern for them.

  TRUST TIPS

  With Demonstrate Respect on the bell curve, it becomes obvious that the behaviors on the left—which demonstrate too little concern—often derive from issues of Integrity (insufficient humility), Intent (too much ego; not caring enough), or Capabilities (not knowing how to demonstrate caring or respect). Excessive behaviors on the right—including overprotectiveness, jealousy, pandering, and unproductive worry—may come from issues of Intent (more focus on self than on acting in what is really someone’s best interest), Capabilities (attitudes and style), and Results (taking too much responsibility; not being sensitive to the effects of the behavior).

  Again, it’s interesting to note that in this, as well as all the behaviors, the judgment that comes from strengthening and blending the 4 Cores is vital to hitting the “sweet spot” on the curve.

  Below are a few ideas that might help as you seek to Demonstrate Respect:

  • Apply the “Waiter Rule” to yourself in terms of how you treat people at work and at home. Do you like what you see? If not, focus on improving your Intent.

  • Think about specific things you can do to show others you care about them. Call people. Write thank-you notes. Give acknowledgment. Send e-mails of concern. Try to do something each day to put a smile on someone’s face—even if that someone is the janitor in the building where you work. Don’t let there be a gap between how you feel and what you do.

  • Never take existing relationships for granted—particularly relationships with loved ones, family, and friends. Avoid the common tendency to put more energy into new relationships and assume that people in existing relationships know you care. There is probably a greater need for demonstrations of concern in existing relationships than in new relationships.

  SUMMARY: BEHAVIOR #2—DEMONSTRATE RESPECT

  Genuinely care for others. Show you care. Respect the dignity of every person and every role. Treat everyone with respect, especially those who can’t do anything for you. Show kindness in the little things. Don’t fake caring. Don’t attempt to be “efficient” with people.

  BEHAVIOR #3: CREATE TRANSPARENCY

  You can’t manage a secret.

  —ALAN MULALLY, FORMER CEO, FORD MOTOR COMPANY

  Several years ago, when Donald Carty was CEO of American Airlines, the company worked to get significant wage concessions from its unions in order to keep the airline afloat and out of bankruptcy. It ended up negotiating $1.8 billion in annual wage and benefit cuts from the unions.

  During this proc
ess of negotiation, however, the company made arrangements to provide substantial “stay” bonuses for the top six American Airlines executives, and a special trust was established so that executive pensions would be paid for the top 45 executives even if the company went into bankruptcy. Nothing done was illegal, but it was not disclosed to the unions during negotiations.

  However, these executive perks had to be revealed in an annual SEC filing, which came out on the day the union approved the pay cuts. The disclosure caught the unions completely by surprise. It immediately destroyed whatever trust Carty had—not only with the unions, but also with at least some members of the board. According to BusinessWeek, “Suddenly, Carty’s calls for ‘shared sacrifice’ rang hollow,” and “[t]he price of Carty’s bungling turned out to be his job.” Within days, Carty resigned.

  When Gerard Arpey came in as the new CEO, he immediately faced a huge “inheritance tax” created by this prior behavior. Arpey said that he would work to “restore the confidence of all employees.” His approach was open rather than secretive, transparent rather than hidden. He created an open-door environment, began disclosing all financial matters to his unions, turned down a raise the board offered him, and sold the company’s expensive art, which had become an inappropriate symbol in a difficult time. Most significantly, he involved the unions directly in the company’s problems by putting union representatives on senior management committees so that they could see the challenges from the same vantage point as management. He said, “Some people think that the unions are the problem, but we think they are part of the solution.”

  Try to be transparent, clear and truthful. Even when it is difficult, and above all when it is difficult.

  —JEAN-CYRIL SPINETTA, CHAIRMAN AND CEO, AIR FRANCE

  Arpey’s behavior was not a “show”; it was the extension of his real character and competence (his 4 Cores). He said, “The only way to build trust professionally and personally is by being trustworthy. I hope I’m living up to that standard.”

  I’ll never forget the day I ran into a pilot from American Airlines on an elevator and I asked him, “What do you think of Gerard Arpey?”

  Without hesitating, he replied, “He’s outstanding! I can trust him.”

  Strong reputations result when companies are transparent in the way they conduct their affairs.

  —CHARLES FOMBRUN, AUTHOR OF REPUTATION

  Behavior #3—Create Transparency—is about being open. It’s about being real and genuine and telling the truth in a way people can verify. It’s based on the principles of honesty, openness, integrity, and vulnerability. I also like to include the principle of light, because when something is transparent, light will flow through it. In the words of former U.S. Supreme Court Justice Louis Brandeis, “Sunshine is the best disinfectant.” It cleanses. It dissipates the shadows. It casts out the darkness. It enables people to see. It gives them a sense of comfort and confidence because they know there’s nothing being hidden.

  The opposite of Create Transparency is to hide, cover, obscure, or make dark. It includes hoarding, withholding, having secrets, and failing to disclose. It includes hidden agendas, hidden meanings, hidden objectives. The antonym for transparent is opaque—meaning something that is impervious to light and through which images cannot be seen.

  The counterfeit of transparency is illusion. It’s pretending, “seeming” rather than “being,” making things appear different than they really are. The Internet is a good example of both transparency and illusion. At the same time as it engenders extraordinary transparency, allowing people to get information and access truth wherever they live, it also creates a place where people can make up pseudonyms and interact with others inside an illusion—where nobody knows their true identity or intent.

  BUILDING TRUST FAST

  More and more in our global economy, transparency is gaining recognition as a critical value in high-trust organizations. According to PwC, the “spirit of transparency” is the first key to restoring public trust.

  And transparency will usually establish trust fast. For example, when a certain charity recently fell into trouble, it took the quickest path to restore trust, which was simply to show people where their money was going. In situations where there is a conflict of interest, the best way to prevent it from turning into a concern is to simply be up-front about it and to address it in the spirit of complete disclosure. Transparent companies are constantly disclosing relationships, interests, and conflicts ahead of time so that everything is always out in the open and no one can question their agenda.

  Particularly when trust is low, people don’t trust what they can’t see. By opening things up, you assure people that there’s nothing to hide.

  A good example of transparency is the way in which Toyota operates with their suppliers. In an industry where most automakers focus on getting the lowest price and telling suppliers what to do, Toyota models a different-in-kind approach. They focus on building long-term relationships with and among their suppliers, who, in turn, collaborate with Toyota and with one another. Although product knowledge is treated as proprietary, process knowledge is expected to be shared within the value chain. Toyota’s approach could not work without abundant transparency from all participants, and it is this transparency that is at the core of all Toyota’s supplier relationships. As validation of this approach, consider that Toyota has been ranked number one on the automobile manufacturer-supplier Working Relations Index for seven years in a row.

  Another great example—and one that made a huge deposit to me personally—was the way a CEO of a $500 million company negotiated with me on a particular deal. He and I met and laid out the potential framework for the deal, but didn’t finalize it because the input and buy-in of this CEO’s sales, product development, and legal teams was critical to its success. I wrote up the potential deal points and sent them by e-mail to the CEO as a deal term sheet. After meeting with his people, he received redlined markups of the term sheet from the heads of his team, describing their issues and concerns. Rather than summarizing their concerns, he simply forwarded those communications directly to me, with no edits. This stunned me. It allowed me to understand and address the real issues without guessing. I decided to reciprocate the transparency and sent a similar document to his people with my markup of their concerns. As a result, we were able to negotiate a better deal for both parties, and we did so in probably a third of the time it would have taken without such transparency.

  From the standpoint of speed and cost, transparency makes enormous sense. You don’t have to worry about hidden agendas. You don’t have to second-guess. You don’t have to waste time and energy trying to maintain an appearance or keep up with which approach you took with which person.

  Many companies create transparency with their own employees by going to what is known as Open Book Management—opening up their financial statements for the entire company to see. I worked with one CFO who said that this built trust faster than anything the company had ever done. He said, “Initially, there was some skepticism about whether what we had shared were the real numbers. But we sustained the approach, and it soon resulted in a palpable excitement and an enormous increase in trust. That’s when the company started becoming highly profitable.”

  We adopted a philosophy that we wouldn’t hide anything, not any of our problems, from the employees.

  —ROLLIN KING, FOUNDER, SOUTHWEST AIRLINES

  Creating transparency also creates buy-in. In a family, for example, being transparent with children about finances and inviting their participation in spending decisions not only helps them understand why you sometimes have to say “no,” it also helps them become more sensitive to the appropriateness of asking for certain things in the first place, so you don’t have to waste time and emotional energy dealing with inappropriate requests. As an added bonus, transparency gives children an understanding of family economy and helps them become more responsible in their own spending decisions as they mature.


  To negotiate with transparency does not mean you always have to lay all your cards on the table. But it does mean that you are transparent with appropriate information and with what you’re trying to accomplish.

  TRUST TIPS

  In Create Transparency, as in all of the behaviors, there must be responsible balance. Particularly in public companies, there are certain things the law does not allow you to disclose to anyone unless it can be disclosed to everyone. There are other things that are confidential and inappropriate to disclose. Good, common sense would tell you that you don’t talk about confidential matters, private conversations, or other things you don’t have a right to talk about.

  I was in one situation where a CEO attempted to create transparency in a management meeting by disclosing the salaries of everyone, including the management team in the room. This quickly changed the tenor of the meeting, and people suddenly began to look around wondering why some of their peers were making two times more than they were. Unbalanced by other behaviors such as Demonstrate Respect, this action was a shock to the system. It was on the far right of the bell curve. It was irresponsible transparency—too much, too fast. Most often, this kind of behavior comes from a lack of one or more of the following: humility (Integrity), mutual benefit agenda (Intent), trust abilities and leadership skill (Capabilities), or appropriate definition of and sensitivity to outcomes (Results).

  On the left side of the curve, though, why would you limit appropriate transparency? Why would you withhold information? Why would you not put at least all your objectives, if not all your cards, on the table? Failure to create transparency usually indicates a lack of honesty or courage (Integrity), a hidden rather than open agenda (Intent), or a lack of Trust Ability to discern the importance of transparency and create it (Capabilities).