The Dragon Finds Forever (Nocturne Falls Book 7)
Page 10
“But I am not a fighter anymore.”
And there it was. Her reason for being here, underlined in black and white. “I don’t know how you can give that up.”
“Because I can.” He bent forward like he was going to kiss her.
She stepped back, grinning.
He looked confused. “No kiss?”
“You can kiss me.” She kept backing up until she reached the door that led to the lower level. She opened it, reached in, and flipped the switch. There wasn’t much to see beyond the steps. She glanced back at Van. Grom stood next to him, ready to go but watching for his master’s command. “I’ll be on the stairs. Halfway down.”
Van laughed and limped after her. Truth was, he hadn’t put his brace on because it was a huge chore, but also because his leg wasn’t bothering him this morning nearly as much. After last night’s activity, he’d expected serious pain today, but that wasn’t the case at all. Which told him that Lisa was right about exercising the leg.
Didn’t make him happy about letting her downstairs, but he trusted her. So far anyway. She seemed like a good person. Something about her told him that she was a fighter too. Someone who has dealing with her own obstacles in life. She was able to stand up to him, that was for sure. To him, that alone was a mark of a strong person.
And yes, she was an incredible kisser and smart and beautiful, and he liked her company. All of that made for a very appealing package. So much so that where he had once wanted to be left alone, now he just wanted to be left alone with Lisa.
It was funny how much things could change in just a couple days.
Grom walked along with Van to the door, then stopped at the first step. Van motioned for the dog to head down. “Go ahead, Grom.”
But the dog stayed at Van’s side.
Van lifted his gaze to Lisa. “Call him to you. I don’t want him underfoot when I’m on the steps.”
She patted her leg. “Come on, Grom. Good dog. Come here.”
“You have to say ko mne. It’s Russian for come.”
She repeated the word. “Ko mne, Grom.”
Her accent wasn’t quite right, but it wasn’t bad either. Grom’s ears perked up, and he trotted down the stairs. She scratched his ears. “Good boy.”
Her gaze shifted to Van. “Now you.” She patted her leg again, her voice low and saucy. “Ko mne, Van.”
He laughed and shook his head. “A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.” But there was something oddly arousing about a woman who felt comfortable enough to talk to him that way. Again, he was reminded what rare company that put her in. Besides Pandora, and perhaps Norma to some extent, he couldn’t imagine another who would do that.
The stairs loomed before him. He wasn’t afraid of the steepness or the pain now so much as he hated looking weak in front of her. It was ridiculous, and he recognized that it was male ego more than anything else, but he knew himself well enough to know what else it meant.
He cared what Lisa thought, because he liked Lisa. In a way, that was very different than just being friends with someone. He could see the possibility of a future with her. Just in a daydream sort of way, but still…he’d given it more than a minute of thought. How about that? And two days ago, he’d been decided on turning his back to the world. He grunted out a little laugh.
“What was that?” she asked.
“Nothing. Coming.” He maneuvered himself carefully onto the first step. It was a balancing act with the crutches. Too far forward and he’d pitch down the stairs. Too far back and taking the next step became even more difficult. Right in the center, that was where he needed to be.
Step by step, with the speed of a geriatric snail, he progressed, until he finally joined Lisa where she stood. He commanded Grom to go lie down. This time, the dog listened to Van and trotted the rest of the way down the steps and into the gym.
Van faced Lisa. He wasn’t breathing hard or feeling it in his muscles, but he couldn’t deny he’d been too long away from his regular fitness routine. “Here I am.”
She smiled. “Here you are.”
She leaned up, kissed him on the mouth, then practically skipped the rest of the way to the bottom. “Again.”
He groaned and tipped his head back. “You’re playing games.”
“And you’re making progress.”
He leaned on the crutches. “Is there another kiss for me?”
Her smile was sly but sweet. “Do you want one?”
“Yes.” Very much he did. But this time, he wanted more than just a quick peck.
“Then get moving, comrade.”
He snorted at her sass, genuinely happy for the first time in many days. “Da, komandir.” He started moving again with the same care.
She leaned against the wall. “Can I ask you something sort of…personal?”
He kept his eyes on the steps. “Sure.” He’d seen her in her underwear. It seemed only fair to answer a question or two about himself.
“Are you working on getting rid of your accent?”
He looked up. “Why do you ask?”
“I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, but I overheard you in your office yesterday, and that’s kind of what it sounded like.”
He worked down to the next step. “Da.” He sighed. “I mean yes, not da. But some habits are hard to break.”
“I think you should say whatever you want to.” She was quiet a moment. “Can I ask why you’re trying to get rid of it?”
He kept moving. “So I am easier to understand. So I fit in better. Because this is my country now.”
“I don’t think you’re hard to understand. In fact, I kind of like your accent.”
He glanced at her. Two more steps. “You do?”
“Yes.” She smiled. “It’s sort of sexy.”
The word sent a bolt of pleasure through him, and suddenly, the steps were taking way too long. He balanced on his good leg, leaned forward, planted his crutches on the bottom step, and swung down to join her in one fast movement, putting them face-to-face. In this light and at this distance, he realized there were flecks of gold in her eyes. How perfect. “I have been told that before.”
She stared up at him confidently. “I’m sure. Just like I’m sure you’re used to having women all over you at the fights.” Her expression grew a little smug. Like she knew his type.
He moved closer. “Da.” If she liked his native tongue, he’d use it. “But they are rarely the kind of women I want to spend time with.”
“Oh? And what type of woman do you want to spend time with?”
“Petite redheads with green eyes who like to go outside in their underwear.” He bent and took the kiss he’d been promised.
Her palms coasted up his arms to settle on his shoulders. The feel of her delicate hands exploring his body rocked him to his core. She touched him as if she’d never touched a man like him before. He doubted that was true, but she had the most amazing gift of making him feel that way.
She leaned into him, but only a little. Maybe she was unsure of how stable he was on the crutches.
He was plenty stable. He freed one hand and planted it on the small of her back, pulling her closer.
The kiss deepened for a few more perfect seconds, then her hands slipped off his arms to his chest and pushed, breaking them apart. Her gaze held an odd gloominess. Not at all the response he’d expected from that kiss. “Don’t fall for me, Van. We can’t be a thing. It’s too complicated.”
“There is nothing complicated about it. Unless you do not like me the way I like you?”
She stared at the center of his chest, finally shaking her head. “Feelings can’t play into this.”
“That is like trying to discuss how lights work without using the word electricity.”
She laughed, a soft, melancholy sound. “You’re a smart guy, you know that? All I can tell you is, I’m not the kind of woman you want to spend time with either. Trust me.”
“I do trust you, but…” None of that made sense to hi
m. And after that kiss, he couldn’t let it go. “At least tell me why?”
She hesitated, taking a long breath before answering him. “I’ve already told you. I work for the League, you work for the League—”
“And I told you, I am retired.”
She lifted her chin, and a hardness he’d never seen before filled her eyes. “No, you’re not. By your own admission, you’re a fighter. You’ll go back, even if you say otherwise now. If we were a couple, I’d want you to go back, because frankly, it’s where you belong. I know you feel defeated and you’re dealing with this injury, but inside, you need to fight. It’s part of who you are. And getting involved with me would only sidetrack that. At some point, you’d end up breaking things off so you could fight again without worrying about the conflict of interest. Or worse, you’d really and truly quit and then, in time, come to resent me as the reason you never stepped into the ring again.”
He couldn’t deny that in his heart of hearts, he would love to fight again. He swallowed, trying to find the words to tell her that everything she’d just said had hit the mark.
“Your silence tells me I’m right.” She stepped around him and walked into the gym, forcing him to turn. “All I am is a convenient distraction, Van.”
He followed after her. “I do not feel that way.”
“I’m sure you don’t right now. But next week? Next month?” She sighed. “You really want to prove that I’m more than that to you? Then complete your contract. Fight that rematch. Then, when you’re standing in that ring, with your championship belt back in your hands, tell me you’re quitting and maybe I’ll believe you. Because until then, you’re always going to be wondering what if. And I don’t want to be the thing that stopped you from answering that question.”
He stared at her, searching his head and his heart for what he really desired. Two answers came over and over. He wanted her.
And he wanted to fight.
Monalisa stood there in the middle of Van’s workout room, waiting for him to answer and wondering if this would be the moment when he threw her out.
Then the muscles in his jaw flexed. “You’re right.”
Her mouth opened in surprise. She snapped it shut. She hadn’t expected that to work. Her smile came naturally. “I’m glad.”
He moved toward her. “But I’m not willing to give you up for the ring. I want both.”
Her belly twisted. That was not supposed to be part of his decision. “I don’t see how that can happen.”
“I do. We’ll keep our relationship a secret until after the fight. Then, no matter if I win or lose—”
“You’ll win.”
He smiled. “And I will retire for good afterwards. Regardless of the outcome. Then you and I can do what we like, and it won’t matter who knows about it.”
There were a thousand reasons why that wouldn’t work, but arguing any of them would be pointless if she wanted to earn her freedom. All she had to do was nod and agree. Van didn’t need to know she was dying inside, mortified by her own actions.
For the thousandth time, she thought about telling him everything and hoping for the best, but she was already so deeply in. And he’d just agreed to fight again. The coin was within her grasp.
Soul sick at her own ability to deceive such an amazing guy, she somehow smiled and nodded. “Sure, we can give that a try.”
Saying those words made her feel even worse. How was she going to get through the next few days of pretending everything was fine when all of this was to get herself free? Sure, getting Van to fight of his own accord was better than her compelling him to do it against his wishes, but it was still all so awful. She hated herself. Almost as much as she hated her father.
“Good. You will help me with this rehab. Then I will be healed and able to train again to prepare for this final match.”
“Exactly.” She turned away, unable to face him, but masked her true feelings by looking around the room. The downstairs was an enormous space filled with every kind of workout machine and piece of equipment imaginable. There was even a practice ring in the center. The end walls were mirrored. She avoided looking into those, unwilling to see her lying, treacherous face.
On the stair wall, there was a large steel door that looked like something off an old World War II bunker, but it probably went to the garage. “You sure have everything you need down here, don’t you?”
“I do. I will get started on the bike.”
She fixed her smile in place. “Great. Hey, would you mind if I went upstairs and took my shower while you got your time in? I hadn’t quite gotten that far with my morning routine.”
“Go ahead.” He winked at her. “And I promise not to cheat.”
The smile got harder to maintain. “I’m going to hold you to that.” She turned and walked back up the stairs. As soon as she set foot in the kitchen, her smile flatlined and she sucked in a hard breath.
She was a horrible person. With no options. Her father would force her to do what he wanted, no matter what she decided. She stared at the ceiling and tried not to cry.
The hum of the bike started up, muted by the distance between them. Now was as good a time as any to text her father the news.
She marched up to the bedroom and dashed off a text to him. Everything’s a go.
Then she tossed her phone on the bed and climbed into the hottest shower she could stand. Her skin was pink when she got out, but the heat hadn’t done anything to erase the guilt riddling her.
She couldn’t do this to Van. She liked him. Really liked him. He was such a good man. The kind of guy she could see herself with, if she ever got that lucky again. He didn’t deserve this. She wrapped up in a towel and grabbed her phone off the bed.
Her father had responded. That’s my girl.
“Not anymore,” she whispered as she dialed his number.
He answered immediately. “My darlin’ girl, I knew you could do it.”
“I am not your girl. And I am not doing this. I’m going to tell him everything, and then you can deal with that.”
Silence answered her. But only for a second. “You will do this, Monalisa. We’ve discussed it. And now I command you to do it. And you know the consequences of ignoring your father’s command.”
A sharp pain pierced the back of her skull, just a phantom recollection of what was to come, for sure, but she winced at the memory all the same. “I don’t care anymore. I’d rather be dead than your slave.”
He laughed. “You may get your wish, then, girlie. But we both know you won’t last. The pain will get too much like last time, and you’ll cave. Then Sean will have to come out there and bring you home. What’s left of you anyway. You’ll be a quiverin’ mess by then. But if that’s what you want…”
She hung up on him, and a sob racked her body. So much for today being a good day.
Getting dressed, putting makeup on, and drying her hair were exercises in endurance. She felt numb and sick and disgusted with herself. And her father.
But she also felt helpless. Because she was.
She went out and stood on the balcony for a moment, drinking in the cold air and trying for just a second to forget the mess she was in. She couldn’t, of course, but the fresh air made her feel a little better.
Maybe once this was all over and she was free, she could come back here and explain everything to Van. She didn’t really expect him to forgive her, but at least she’d get to tell him her side of the story and explain why she’d lied to him.
That made her feel a little better. Enough that she was able to head back down to the gym.
She stopped at the bottom of the steps, unable to do much else but ogle.
Van stood in front of one of the big hanging punching bags. It was easy to see that he was bearing most of his weight on his good leg, but he wasn’t using crutches, and that was impressive. But not as impressive as the sight of him shirtless and pounding on the bag.
Each hit showed off the muscles in his back and arms as th
ey flexed and moved. He’d land a punch, then balance himself. Over and over. The sheer size of him was remarkable, but the power of his strikes was stunning. The bag jumped each time he struck it.
She could only imagine what he could do to an opponent in the ring. No wonder the manticore had bitten Van. There was probably no other way to stop the force of a dragon shifter.
He grabbed hold of the bag, steadying it.
“Very impressive.”
He looked over his shoulder and smiled. “I did my time on the bike, I promise.”
“I believe you. How does your leg feel?”
“Pain is weakness leaving the body.”
She laughed. She’d experienced real pain. That wasn’t what it had felt like to her. “If you say so. But does that mean you’re hurting?”
He shrugged. “Is okay.”
Obviously, he wasn’t going to admit how badly he hurt. She got it. Men were like that. “Why don’t we call that done for today, then?”
He nodded and limped to a nearby bench and sat. His crutches and T-shirt were there. Grom came running over from where he’d been lying near the wall. Van picked up his T-shirt and pulled it on. “Let’s go into town today.”
“Sure. Do you need help with some errands?”
“No. I thought you might like to see more of it. We can have lunch. Stop by the pet store and get Grom a new bone.”
At the word bone, Grom’s ears perked up.
“That would be great.” And a nice way to distract herself. She crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows. “You are going to shower, though, right?”
He laughed as he pushed himself up on his crutches. “I will not end up looking as nice as you, but I will try.”
An hour later, they were on Main Street, courtesy of a Ryde driver. Van had put his brace on over jeans, which he’d paired with a fisherman’s sweater and lug-soled boots. The bulk of the sweater made him look even bigger. Maybe because of that and his shaved head and resting serial killer face, people gave them a fairly wide berth on the sidewalk.