Justiss And Graver (MC Bear Mates Book 4)

by Becca Fanning

  “How are you really feeling?”

  “I wouldn’t lie to her, Graver,” Justiss murmured, a reprimand in his tone. “I meant it. I’m fine. Just tired.”

  “Don’t you feel the bond?” He stretched out his legs then began to twitch his feet. “I can. It’s hard to ignore.”

  “Of course, I can feel it. I have no doubt that she can too. But there’s no point in forcing it. She’s not ready. I don’t think she has much experience.”

  “No, I agree.” Graver’s grin was slow and cheeky. “I’m kind of glad about that.”

  Justiss snorted. “We’re men. Of course, we are. Kings of the double standard.” He yawned. “The bond is gonna burn us both before it does her,” he warned. “You might want to prepare yourself for that.”

  “You were on a run when Annette and Mars came back to the clubhouse that first time, weren’t you?” Graver replied, grinning a tad smugly at him. “The bond will hit us all equally. I can feel it already, but I think the issue is that we’re all so goddamn tired, especially after tonight’s ordeal. We should feel it in the morning, and I hope we do. I want her safe, and I want her protected. That isn’t going to happen until she’s bound to us.” He shuddered. “I still can’t get over the fact that nurse injured herself with a piece of fucking paper. I want Toni safeguarded, especially with Moses roaming around. Mars didn’t say anything about the guys having found him or his cronies, so she’s in danger until we put an end to their shit.”

  Justiss scraped a hand over his jaw as he contemplated Aaron’s words. As he pondered them, he trudged over to the bed, shucked off the towel both of them were using for decency’s sake in front of their new mate, and climbed under the covers.

  The crisp sheets gave way to his form, clinging to him and immediately warming as his skin connected with the cotton. He grabbed a pillow, punched it with his fist, then hooked it between arm and shoulder as he rolled onto his side and got comfortable. The minute he was settled, he murmured, “We’ll bind her to us when she’s ready. Not a minute sooner.”

  Graver hissed in a breath. “Don’t be so blasé about it, J. Jesus, she’s in danger all the time she’s here and not protected.”

  “What would you have us do?” he asked, his tone drowsy. “Force her?” The question prompted him to snort at the ridiculousness of his words. “Look, we’re aware of the threat, and we defend and protect her from our enemies until she’s ready to accept us in more than just her mind, but her body and soul too.” With that, he let out a sigh. “Now, I’m going to sleep. It’s been an exhausting day.”

  Before Graver could reply, he heard J snore. Exasperation flooded him, but he let it flow out as quickly as it flowed in. There was no point in being annoyed, no point in getting mad. Justiss always had been an intractable bastard, and it was something he was used to as a friend, but wasn’t so used to on an intimate setting. Time would change that, but at the moment, that didn’t help him, so he had to help himself.

  He took a seat on the sofa, making sure his towel covered everything up. Before they’d returned to her after shifting, they’d showered and cleaned up. Both of them had blood where blood shouldn’t be and all kinds of crap dusting them up. They were ready for bed when Toni was ready, and when the bathroom door opened, he wished they were ready for more.

  With a towel of her own tucked around her, she looked more diminutive than before, a pocket Goddess who scared him with how small she was when they were big guys. Her high cheekbones seemed all the higher thanks to the way she’d arranged her hair in a messy topknot that had tendrils floating free to cling to her still slightly damp shoulders and throat. Her caramel eyes were soft and sleepy, faint shadows hovering underneath them with her exhaustion.

  Though he’d resigned himself to not starting the binding process tonight, that resignation was lightened by how tired she looked. He’d never have forced her, but he might have played dirty just as a means of making her safe. But she looked so tiny, so delicate, and this was his mate. His woman. His other half. She needed rest. Care. And as she was his, he was duty bound to give her what she needed.

  “Did you forget the sleepshirt Annette gave you?” he asked softly, watching with a faint smile as she blinked blurry eyes at him. “You took it into the bathroom with you. Go and get changed, Toni. You’ll feel better when you’re not in that damp towel.”

  She blinked again and then a tad robotically padded back into the bathroom, doing as he’d bid. He heard the sounds of fabric rubbing against fabric, then nothing else. He waited a few more minutes then stepped toward her, wondering why she hadn’t come out when she had to be covered up by now. What he saw damn near broke his heart. Head bowed, swaying a little on her feet, she looked like she was about to fall asleep standing up.

  Before she had chance to do anything like protest, he swept her up into his arms and carried her back into the bedroom. She didn’t even yelp, just nuzzled into him, settling her head under his chin and sighing with a contentedness that made his heart beat faster. He felt like a shit having to put her down when she’d made herself so comfortable in less than thirty seconds, but he managed to lever up the sheet and duvet and slide her underneath. She rolled onto her side, her back to Justiss’s front and mumbled, “Come on, Aaron. Get into bed. It’s cold without you.”

  At that, his fool heart about turned itself upside down in his chest.

  It had been damn cold without her in his life, and now, he had a perpetual summer waiting for him.

  As he slipped between the sheets and felt her curl into him, sliding a leg over his thighs to hook him close, he realized what he’d been missing all these years was something Justiss had had to live without for a helluva longer time than Graver had to.

  Her.

  But not anymore.

  The thought filled him with an indescribable warmth, and Graver knew that if he’d been a cat shifter, right about now, he’d have been purring.

  Chapter 5

  Two days later

  “Do you think we should wake her?”

  Justiss scraped his jaw as he peered down at their still sleeping mate. “I don’t know.”

  “She’s probably missed some days at work,” Graver hissed. “If she blames anyone, you make sure you let her know it’s your fault. I told you we should charge her cellphone…”

  “And have it wake her up when she’s exhausted? I don’t think so. How the hell can she prepare herself for the bonding if she’s so tired she can’t think straight? You told me yourself, she fell asleep standing up. Who does that unless they’re on their last nerve?” Justiss shook his head and put his hands on his hips.

  “She won’t appreciate it. I know already she’s a stubborn little thing.”

  “Yeah, well, sometimes we have to look out for her in ways she wouldn’t look out for herself. I fully expect she’ll do the same to us. It’s a symbiotic relationship.”

  Graver grumbled, “You say that now because you can. She’s asleep and can’t argue the difference.” He let out a sigh. “Two days. Jesus, I didn’t know you could sleep that long. It’s not like the clubhouse is all that quiet either.”

  “I don’t think she’s been sleeping well for a long time.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  Justiss shrugged. “It fits. She’s a doctor. When do they have healthy sleep schedules?”

  “True.”

  “Plus, she was a little jittery in the truck when we brought her home. Of course, that could have been nerves from being with us.”

  “Are we just going to leave her until she wakes up?”

  Justiss stared at his sleeping mate then nodded. “I think so. Come on, I need to speak to Mars anyway.” As he turned away, he fought the inclination to duck down and kiss her on the forehead. He wanted her to rest for as long as she needed, and apparently, she really needed it.

  The white space of the rooms they’d been given two nights ago was a blank canvas. Over the past few months of her being the Prez’s mate, Annette
had been taking older quarters, which were naturally reserved for mated couples—of which, until recently, there’d been few—and had been bringing them up to par. They were blank so the female mate could take the room and decorate how she wanted it to be. Even when he told Tonia that, he figured she would still be dissatisfied with the space.

  After all, even the MC’s finest wasn’t the country club’s worst.

  He pursed his lips at the thought then shrugged it off. He refused to be like his old man, forever trying and failing to prove to his mate that he could provide for her.

  Justiss could and would give Tonia everything she needed. Unlike his father, he had the money. But sometimes, it went beyond money. It was about choices. They could throw tens of thousands of bucks on this room, and it still wouldn’t satisfy her.

  By the same rote, the MC was his home. At least, it had been until she’d come along.

  The thoughts ran in tangent as he made it down the hall toward the council room, Graver at his side.

  “You’re unusually quiet,” he pointed out when Graver didn’t pepper him with questions or shoot any shit as was his usual way.

  “Not much to say.”

  “That blood sacrifice sure as hell went a ways to shutting your trap a lot.” He looked at him from the corner of his eye. “We still haven’t talked about that. You keep changing the subject whenever I do.”

  “Not much to say.”

  That he repeated his earlier words verbatim seemed to shock Graver more than it did Justiss.

  He gulped, cast a shifty look about, and hunched his shoulders when he realized no one had been looking.

  “What’s going on, Aaron?” he asked, using his given name to denote how serious he was. When no answer was forthcoming, he knocked on the council room door. When no one replied, he knew it was empty. It came as a relief because he and Graver could clear some air, but he had been hoping to talk to Mars, and he tended to use this place as his office as well as his war room.

  When he stepped inside, Graver followed. The scratched table had once been a nice piece of wood. He’d seen it when an old Prez had installed it brand new. Now, scarred and scraped from misuse, it needed sanding down and polishing again. Not that that would ever happen.

  Contrary to the distressed table, there were expensive ergonomic armchairs surrounding it, and not a hell of a lot else in the room. Save for the head, where Mars had left a lot of papers untended. Not that they interested him.

  MC business had been of no interest to him for decades.

  He stuck around because this was his bear’s home. His bear’s family. A Clan was more than any human could ever understand. It was a safe spot, sure, but more than that, it enabled a connection to form between bears. Dragging a solitary creature into a communal space where other bears became more than just rivals, they became brothers.

  If it hadn’t have been for that aspect of the Clan, he’d have left years ago. Jefferson hadn’t been the first shitty Prez. He’d been one in a string of many shitheads. His rules, however, had been harder than most, and when Justiss had tried to oppose them, he’d been internally exiled. Not cast out but cast aside. Most of the men had ignored him or spoken to him with guilt lining their every word because they didn’t want to be seen talking to him and felt bad for it.

  Even that hadn’t made him leave the MC. Now, he had hope. He had a place in this room, on the council, where he should have been a long time ago. He had ideas, many of them, ones which would take the MC from being a piddling club of outlaws into a company that could run on the right side of the law.

  Which was probably why Moses had tried to kill him.

  Some of the dicks in the MC really preferred the outlaw tag.

  Shaking his head, he rolled out a desk chair and plunked himself down. Rocking in it a little, he watched Graver to see what he’d do and wasn’t altogether surprised when he just walked over to a window and looked down onto the backyard.

  Now that most of the Ukrainian women had left the MC to try and find their own paths to the American Dream without their help, it was more likely a brother would spot a bear out there. When the women had still been at the clubhouse, they’d all had to stop shifting, which had merely augmented internal tensions. As a result, there’d been a lot of bitterness growing between the old Prez’s cronies and ex-council, and the new and current Prez.

  Mars was a good man, and Justiss fully intended on helping him become the best Prez they’d ever have. To do that, he needed to figure this situation out with Graver and his mate, because until that was resolved, his mind wouldn’t be focused.

  “What’s going on, Aaron?” he asked again, a tad more demanding now they were alone.

  Silence was his answer until Graver turned around, leaned against the windowsill, and folded his arms against his chest. “Just trying to make things fit in my head, that’s all.”

  “You saved me. Do you regret it?” It hurt him to ask the question, but that hurt disappeared when Graver immediately scowled.

  “Do I hell. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

  “So, what’s the problem then?”

  Aaron gripped the windowsill, clenching down until his knuckles bled white. “When I initiated the sacrifice, it wasn’t how I expected.” He ruffled his shoulders as though trying to offload the tension gathering there. “Mars has never spoken about it, but I get the feeling what I did was different.”

  “Well, it was. I mean blood sacrifices are usually for mates, aren’t they? We can do it between men, it’s not like it’s forbidden or anything, but we just don’t. Do we?”

  “I guess not. But after I initiated it, I spoke with a Goddess.”

  Justiss gulped. Surprised, despite himself. “Are you kidding me?”

  “No,” Aaron breathed. “I wish I was. But I’m not.”

  “What did she have to say?”

  “That we’d pay a price for my sacrifice.”

  That had Justiss frowning. “How?”

  “She never said. I just figured she was talking about a mate, and then, when we met Toni so shortly afterward, I thought that fit.”

  “I know it’s hard us sharing her, but we’ll get used to it. We just need time.”

  Aaron shrugged. “I don’t dispute that. It’s going to be tough, and I’m not always going to defer to you like I usually do just because you’re older than me. That’s not fair—not when she’s my mate too.”

  “I have no problem with that.”

  “I think you do. You’re taking charge. But in this situation, no one is.”

  “I’m not taking charge,” Justiss countered. “I’m making sense. And even if that sense is running against what you want, you’re not stupid. You know right from wrong. If you’re listening to me, it’s not because you’re placing me in charge, it’s because you know what I’m saying is right.”

  Graver scraped a hand over his jaw. “Maybe you’re right, maybe you’re wrong. But regardless, don’t get used to me always doing as you say.”

  “Like I would anyway.” He snorted. “You’re no yes-man, Aaron. And I haven’t thought that of you anyway. We’re buds. We always have been. We know each other well enough to figure out what’s going on, even in a crazy ass situation like this one.

  “I know speaking to a Goddess must have been tough. It must be messing with your mind, and I’m sorry about that, but you’ve been blessed. You’ve seen what no one has ever spoken about. So now I know, I’m here. If you need to talk about it more then we’ll talk about it more, but for now, the priority is, and always will be, Tonia. We have to do what’s best for her. You get that, right?”

  “Of course, I do. That’s all I want for her as well.”

  “Well then, if we have a shared goal, we’re a united front.”

  Graver smirked. “You’re a shit.”

  Justiss grinned. “Why? Because I’ve dragged you out of your funk?”

  As Graver flipped him the bird, the door to the council room opened and Mars wandered in, he
ad bent over some papers in his hand, Kiko behind him.

  Both men reared back a little at the sight of the two of them in the council room, but Mars only said, “You guys have a problem?”

  Justiss grunted. “You know we do.”

  Kiko shut the door behind him, rested his back against it, then grumbled, “Moses?”

  “What else?” Justiss slammed a hand down on the table. “You should have caught him by now.”

  “There ain’t no ‘should haves’ where this is concerned, J,” Mars immediately countered. “The bastard’s laying low, and we can’t find him. Doesn’t mean we won’t. Just means at the moment, it’s tough when he’s hiding out somewhere.”

  “He nearly killed me, Mars. You want me to just settle for that?”

  “No. I’m not saying that. We’ve had three teams scouring the area for him, but Channelview isn’t exactly small fry, and Houston ain’t easier, is it?”

  “I wonder if you’d have found him if it had been Kiko almost dying in the clubhouse, Mars?” It was hard not to let the bitterness spew, and even when he’d released it, he didn’t feel much better.

  “Justiss, don’t start,” Kiko grated out, holding out a warning hand for him to take heed.

  “I’m not starting shit. I’m stating a fact.” J flashed his glance between Kiko and the Prez, and firmed his jaw when he saw Mars glaring at him.

  “What the fuck would you have me do, Justiss?” Mars snarled, slamming the papers in his hand down against the table so he could lean over it and glower at him. “I can only do so much when most of the territories out there no longer welcome us. I have no idea if Moses has friends among the gangs and the cartel at war with us, and if he is, he’s in a no-go zone.

  “You fought for me, you challenged in my stead. You know the honor that goes to you for doing that for me. I’ve sent unmated councilmembers out on the search; I wouldn’t do that if you were nobody to me. So, drop the attitude. Yeah, you’ve been dosed a shit hand with how Jefferson treated you. I’ll give you that. But I haven’t treated you like shit. I’ve promoted you to the council,3 and I did it in a way that doesn’t look like I’m promoting friends. I did it to try to restore your position in the MC back to you. I wouldn’t have done that if we weren’t friends.”