Reforming the Cowboy

by Marisa Cleveland

  He flipped to a fresh page. And stared at it.

  The noise from the bar below distracted him. It was some ear-bleeding karaoke. Hopping off the bed, he rummaged through the junk drawer in his kitchen until he found the noise-canceling earphones.

  Silence.

  And a blank page.

  He cracked his neck and cleared his throat. He shook his shoulders. He could do this. He was Billy Hardy.

  He closed his eyes and replayed last night and that morning with Lacey. She’d been amazed that they were having sex. Because he used to be a celebrity of sorts. She’d admitted to being a fan. In college. So what attracted her to him now? The idea of what he was, or the man he had become?

  He rolled the pen between his fingers.

  Fangirl.

  His mind blanked. He had no idea what to write. He had no words. Heard no melodies.

  Not even the idea of recording in the studio tomorrow could motivate him.

  So instead of writing a fifth song, he flipped on the TV and scanned the channels until he woke with the remote stuck in his hand and sunlight streaming through the blinds.

  His phone blinked with messages—all texts from Shawna ranting about flying back without him—but all thoughts of his cheating ex-girlfriend fled from his mind as he caught sight of the time and threw himself in the shower.

  He arrived at the studio with two minutes to spare, and as he passed through the glass doors, he waved to his manager flirting with the Barbie doll blonde behind the reception desk area.

  Chip glanced up at the sound of Billy’s boots scraping across the floor. He cut off his sentence and clapped a hand on Billy’s shoulder. “Feels good? To be back.”

  His entire body ached to be back in the studio, but until they actually cut another record—an entire album—he would reserve judgment. One song now, ten more—if he could write them—once this one hit the airwaves. And all he could think about was Lacey’s warm breath on his cheek when she kissed him good-bye and thanked him for…she hadn’t said. She’d left the thank you open-ended.

  The receptionist stood and gestured for them to follow her, but before they were two steps away from the counter, the entrance doors slammed open and Shawna strolled in.

  She tossed the ends of her hair over her shoulder and her gaze bit into Billy’s. Guess he had his answer. She’d made it back in time to harass him. Her voice echoed across the spacious lobby. She wore a ridiculously short dress, and even though he scanned her legs, he couldn’t help but compare her stick-thin pipes to Lacey’s more muscular curves.

  “Billy, you didn’t think you were going to do this without me.” Her icy stare shifted to Chip. “Did you?”

  Chip cleared his throat and moved to step between Billy and Shawna. “What are you doing here, darlin’?”

  Shawna placed her hands on her hips and cocked her head to the side. “What do you think?”

  Chip’s eyes narrowed. “I think you’re confused.”

  Shawna’s upper lip curled in a way Billy remembered well. She was pissed. “No, you are, if you think you’re recording one song without me.”

  That shocked Billy like a punch to the gut. What the hell was his ex blabbing about? “Oh, no. No. No way in hell am I…” He held up his hands. “I am not entering the studio with her.”

  Chip wheeled Billy away from Shawna and whispered under his breath, “Of course not. I would never. Hadn’t even crossed my mind.”

  Shawna followed them. “That’s not what you said two nights ago.”

  Chip whirled on Shawna, but before the manager could retort, the side door opened and a guy no taller than Shawna greeted them. “Hello. I’m Damien Mullen, record executive managing assistant for Mr. Meyers.”

  Billy swallowed his sarcasm at the little guy’s puffed chest and self-important title. When Damien extended his hand, Chip shook it, and Billy used the opportunity to sink back. But his efforts were stalled short when Shawna vise-gripped his biceps.

  She hissed into his ear. “I need you to forgive me.”

  He yanked away from her, but her claws dug into his flesh. Through gritted teeth, he fought hard to remember he was a gentleman. “I need you to let go of me.”

  He wanted to stomp away from her. He didn’t need this crap moments before returning to the biggest game-changer of his career. Or maybe he did need it as a reminder of how crazy his life had been back then. Did he really think it could be about only the music? It was never only the music. It was the image, the groupies, the fame, the money. It wasn’t connecting with fans on a personal level. It wasn’t about forming close relationships and teaching guitar to children and stealing backstage kisses.

  Shawna scraped her nails down his arm and finally released her grip on him. “Look, Billy, we both know I made a mistake.”

  He snorted. She’d made a ton of mistakes—cheating on him, stealing his notebook, thinking he’d take her back—but he’d made the biggest one of all. “I made the mistake of trusting you.”

  Anger flared in her eyes, but she surprised him by tempering her tone. “You know your best songs were always duets.”

  He licked his lips and gazed over her head. At one time he might have believed her, but not anymore. Not since Lacey let him into her café, into her bed, and back into the spotlight. “Yeah, you might think that, but see here, here’s the thing. You always thought your voice sounded better solo.”

  She blinked and sure enough, a glistening tear appeared at the corner of her eye. It no longer constricted his chest. It surprised him to learn that the one trick he’d always fallen for no longer worked.

  Chip clapped a hand on his shoulder. “Are we going to do this?”

  With a fleeting glance at the liquid drop that meant to guilt him, he followed Damien into the studio and let Chip handle his ex.

  …

  Lacey shoved back from her desk and growled in frustration. How many times was she going to rewatch the stupid YouTube video of Billy Hardy playing a song that didn’t even have a name? The number of views was already in the hundreds of thousands, and she wouldn’t be surprised if thousands of hits came solely from her.

  She had to get a grip. She had a business to run. She had a new star and a new promotional poster, and with Trixie being a friend or distant relation to James, she had no doubt the business manager would show up.

  Her stomach growled at the same time her phone buzzed in her pocket. Her heart hammered when she noticed the text message was from Billy.

  Just left studio. Miss you.

  What the hell? What did that even mean? And why was he sending her a text message?

  With shaking fingers she stood and slid her phone into the rear pocket of her skirt. If she had to remind herself every day that they lived thousands of miles apart, she would. Besides, it was time for lunch, she was hungry, and she had a café to run. Not a good time for romantic entanglements with a country singer sexy as sin. Now was not her time to go down in flames. She needed a cool head, not a hot affair.

  Her phone pinged again, and even while she scolded herself, she glanced at the display.

  I’m coming back.

  That text needed a response. Using only one finger, she slowly tapped out, why?

  His response was immediate. Chip booked another visit to hospital. Flight lands on Sunday at ten a.m.

  He already had a flight. He was really coming back. Not for her. She shouldn’t care. She didn’t have time to care. She cared. Okay.

  How are you?

  Did he really want to have a conversation with her via text messages? I’m fine.

  Do you miss me? I miss you.

  She giggled. She couldn’t help it. What were they? Ten-year-olds? Maybe.

  Her phone hummed. She stared at the display and realized she really should delete the naked picture she’d taken of him. Anyone could see him sprawled on her bed when he called.

  With a glance at her closed office door, she clicked the green button. “Hello, Billy.”

  “Hello,
Lacey.”

  Two words and her pulse shot into overdrive. She didn’t have time for emotions. “Why are you calling me?”

  “I wanted to hear your voice.”

  “What are you doing?” Besides messing with her head. She couldn’t keep daydreaming about a fantasy man miles away.

  His low tone was serious. “I’m trying to make this work.”

  “Make what work?” That morning an article had appeared in the local newspaper announcing her café as Dimistar’s latest investment. She’d been pegged as the new up-and-comer to watch, and that meant she had to keep her focus on making her café a success. She didn’t have time for affairs, and she really didn’t have time for the heartache.

  “Us.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I don’t think we’re done.”

  The intensity of his deep voice shot shivers through her body. No one could deny their compatibility in bed. But she figured once he was gone, he was gone. She didn’t want him to say things he would later regret. She didn’t want him to feel obligated to her. She didn’t want him to hurt her when he moved on. “Billy, I don’t have time for relationships.”

  He sighed into the phone. “I’m not asking you to have relationships. Just one. With me.”

  She peeked out the blinds into the café. “Long-distance never works.”

  His voice softened to a charming drawl. “Have you had so many?”

  “No.”

  “Well, then, babe, stop arguing with me and let’s give this a go. Unless…”

  A wave of apprehension landed in her stomach. For all her protests, she wanted him to want her. But it was so hard to believe. She swallowed back her fear of rejection. “What?”

  “Well, unless you’re not interested.”

  “Why would you think that?”

  “Well, maybe you were just using me.”

  “You’re joking, right?” Was that a smile she heard in his voice? This was why she hated long-distance anything. She couldn’t carry on a conversation over the phone. Couldn’t gage the other person’s reaction.

  “I don’t know. You’re the one not willing to try.”

  “I…” Just how did he envision this working? She wouldn’t leave South Beach. He belonged in Nashville. If she didn’t want to jeopardize her financial backer, she needed to prove her café came first and her personal life…well, she didn’t have time for one. His success depended on his public persona. They weren’t compatible in any way. Except in bed. But sex did not make a relationship. She closed her eyes as images of them in her shower whizzed through her memories. She didn’t want to break up with a fight or read about him with some other woman in the tabloids. She also didn’t want a long, drawn-out effort where they lost sight of the good times. Their last moment together should be the laughing, panting after-sex glow she held clear in her head. She opened her eyes and inhaled a lungful of fear. “I’m sorry, Billy, but I can’t.”

  She quietly clicked the end-call button and stared at her phone for several seconds longer. He didn’t text. He didn’t call. And she hated how that shredded her heart into a thousand strands.

  …

  When his phone buzzed in his hand, Billy grinned. No way had Lacey hung up on him. “Just let me love you,” he sang.

  “That’s what I’ve been trying to do,” Shawna purred, her voice grating on Billy’s nerves.

  He yanked open the door to his truck and hauled himself into the cab. He should hang up. But as his sister constantly reminded him, he was a gentleman. Sometimes being polite sucked. “Shawna, you know I thought you were someone else.”

  “I don’t care. Let’s meet.”

  The last thing on his agenda was meeting his cheating ex. His gaze swept the immediate area just to be sure she wasn’t within sight. He wouldn’t put it past her to have stayed in the lot after Chip had her banned from the recording room. He didn’t know what she drove these days, so he really couldn’t tell. She could have been across the street or right next to him. After revving the engine, Billy backed out of his parking space and gunned it out of the studio lot. “I’m not interested.”

  “I already apologized.” He heard the exasperation in her voice.

  Yeah, it probably burned her gut that he wasn’t falling all over his feet trying to get back in her bed. Well, screw her. And screw her mind games. One thing he loved about Lacey… Holy shit! Now was the worst time possible for him to realize he loved anything about Lacey. Not with his single poised to hit airwaves.

  Clearing his throat, he said, “Fine, Shawna. I accept your apology. Now leave me alone.”

  She sniffled. “I can’t believe you’re being so cruel to me.”

  “Me. Cruel to you?” He needed to end this conversation so he could make plans to return to South Beach. He had to convince Lacey that they had a future. But first he needed to make sure Shawna understood they were over. He didn’t need any more baggage following him when he approached Lacey.

  Shawna’s voice cut into his daydream. “I want you back.”

  “Not gonna happen.” Only one reason why she wanted him back, and it wasn’t for the sex. She made it clear she could get that anywhere. “I will never sing another song with you again.”

  She switched from sniffles to whining. “I miss you, Billy, not your songs. I want you in my bed.”

  “No.” Crazy woman. They’d been barely tolerable in bed. After the blaze he and Lacey created, Billy wondered how he ever thought sex with Shawna was satisfying. He couldn’t even compare the two, because with Lacey it wasn’t sex. She was a mixture of strength and generosity and give and take, making it so much more, and yes, he knew that sounded corny, but damn if she wasn’t his better half.

  Shawna’s whining morphed to anger. “Just like that? You’re going to give up everything we had for a slutty barista?”

  “She’s an entrepreneur, and I wasn’t the one who gave up on us, and if you ever call her slutty or another bad word ever again, I’ll…” Damn it all to hell with the gentlemanly manners. “Find a way to burn all your boots.”

  She gasped. He smirked. Leave it to her to think that threat was real. She pleaded, “I told you I made a mistake.”

  He pulled up to a stop sign, glanced in both directions, and pulled onto 4th Ave North. “Sick of hearing the same old song and dance.”

  “Meet me.”

  “I already said no. This is getting old, and I’m a gentleman, so I’ll warn you that I am about to end this conversation.”

  “Billy!”

  “Good-bye, Shawna.”

  “I’ll send our pictures to the tabloids.”

  His finger froze, hovering over the end-call button. She’d do it, too. He knew she had a mean streak in her a mile long. He just hadn’t known it at the time. Funny thing was that two weeks ago, he wouldn’t have cared. But now, with Lacey on the receiving end of his affections, no way in hell would he do anything to jeopardize their budding romance. Now, more than ever, he wanted to maintain a decent image. And not for the potential record deal. He wanted to erase the bad-boy reputation for Lacey.

  He knew she’d come around eventually. He didn’t have it all figured out, but sitting in the recording studio, listening to the producer discuss with his manager the potential for other songs, Billy knew he owed it all to Lacey. He knew she was the reason his heart could hear the music again.

  He sighed. “I’m grabbing some lunch. Meet me at Tonk’s.”

  “I’ll be there. Don’t blow me off.”

  He cut the line and cursed. Damn it all to hell on a Harley. Yeah, he’d been a rowdy guy when the fame first hit. There’d been some wild nights. But he knew those photos would shock the hell out of Lacey. He didn’t want Lacey to see him that way. Sure, Shawna might have a thing for kinky sex, but that wasn’t him. That was some shadow of a guy not knowing what a real relationship was. He firmly believed a relationship involved two people, and right now he wanted to make damn sure those two people were him and Lacey.

 
He entered Tonk’s and plunked down in a booth by the window. The diner had been there forever, and after waiting for twenty minutes, he ordered a sandwich and fries. Shawna rolled into the parking lot as he was polishing off his second slice of apple pie.

  She’d gone all out in her County duds. Pink cowboy boots with the rhinestones up the sides. Mini-jean skirt with more rhinestones around the hem. Pink tank top painted over her fake tits, and a whole lot of bracelets on her wrists that jangled as she sauntered toward him. He noticed other guys doing a double take, and it reminded him of the days when he flaunted her on his arm. What the hell had he been thinking?

  She strutted to his side of the table and bent at the hips to kiss his cheek. He leaned away and pointed to the opposite seat.

  “I’m almost done, so make it quick.”

  She pouted. “Now, is that any way to treat your lover?”

  “Ex-lover.”

  “Come on, Billy. You can’t stay mad at me forever.”

  She was trying to flirt with him, and her desperation actually disgusted him. How could she think she still had the power to manipulate him? “I’m not going to hash this out with you again and again.”

  Shawna’s eyes widened. “I will woo you back to me.”

  Even in her everyday speech, Shawna’s lines sounded lame. No wonder she couldn’t write a song worth a damn.

  Before he could toss some money and leave, Chip entered. He searched the customers until he spotted Billy, and with a cheesy smile in place, Chip joined Shawna’s side of the booth.

  His manager’s face was red and his eyes blazed with excitement. “Did you tell him?”

  “I just got here.”

  “You two are in cahoots now?” Hadn’t Chip just kicked Shawna out of their recording session?

  Chip flagged down a waitress, and she passed him a water and took his order of a grilled chicken sandwich. “Dustin contacted me right after you left.”

  “And I care because?”

  He guzzled the water and huffed after he swallowed half the liquid. “Two words, my cash cow.”

  Cash cow. Nice. His manager just referred to him as bovine. He waited with mild interest. Shawna grinned and Billy swore he saw dollar signs flash in her eyes. Chip rubbed his hands together and leaned forward.