by Stacey Lewis
His suggestion has merit. If I hadn’t followed her to her apartment tonight, we never would have talked and I’d still be trying to figure out who my mystery girl was. Now, I just need to come up with a game plan, and hanging out with these two getting drunk in a bar isn’t going to get that done.
I look over at Reed and grin. “Okay, you guys have convinced me. I’m going to go home and try to figure out what to do to make it easy for her to admit. And Reed?” His eyes narrow on mine at the laughter in my voice. “I’ll definitely be calling Fallon for help.”
He curses under his breath, then tosses some bills on the table and pushes Remy out of the booth. The three of us walk out together, and for the first time in a long time, we exchange hugs before parting ways. I’ve missed the friendship I have with my brothers, and I’m not sure what happened to cause a rift between us. Maybe it was dad being sick and none of us knowing the right way to handle it, or maybe it was something else. I don’t know, but whatever it was, I’m glad we’re getting back to the way we used to be.
“Good luck, Ry.” Reed throws over his shoulder before climbing into his car a smile pulling at his lips. I nod acknowledging his comment.
Luck? Yeah I think I might be needing it.
Chapter Seventeen
Ava
“You’re pregnant?” The words came out more like a statement than a question as she shoved the test into my hands. A number of emotions threatened to break through me but I held my ground, nodding my head yes. I was so mad at myself for letting this happen. It was almost the same thing my mother went through when she had me and I didn’t want to be like that.. Weak for a man that may never really want me.
Marie looked sad, disappointed, devastated all the emotions I was feeling. I tried to suck air into my lungs but I couldn’t. Everything seemed to fall away and it really sunk in then, holding the test in my hand seeing the word on the little screen.
“If you think he’s going to stay you’re terribly mistaken. Men like him don’t stay Ava. You’d be better off never telling him, and putting it up for adoption or getting an abortion.” I blinked in confusion at the harsh tone of her voice.
She didn’t know me at all if she thought I was just going to give the baby away, or worse yet, get rid of it.
“I don’t care if he doesn’t want the baby… It’s mine.” I defended the little bean inside me knowing without a doubt I would never hurt it. I would do whatever I could to protect him or her, no matter what happened.
Marie shook her head, rolling her eyes as if she didn’t believe me, “My mom thought the same shit, and so did yours. Do you think it’s going to be easy Ava? Yeah you have a good job, but that’s until he finds out. Then what? Not to mention, you’re so close to graduating.” Everything she was saying was true. It was going to be hard, and I was close to graduating but I couldn’t do what she asking me or telling me to do.
“I’m keeping the baby Marie. Even if he doesn’t want it. You don’t have to agree with me, but I’m doing what I need to do.” Somewhere deep inside me I grabbed onto the last shred of courage I had. I couldn’t be afraid of what was to come, not without knowing for certain that Ryker wouldn’t want the baby.
He could be different? Better? Not all men were the same, right?
“Whatever, Ava.” Marie through her hands into the air in frustration walking out of the bathroom. I gripped the test in my hand, the plastic biting into my palm.
“He could be different Marie. He could be better.” I expelled rushing from the bathroom after her. She stopped mid-step in the hall, causing our bodies to clash. When she turned around I saw tears in her eyes.
Those tears moved me in a way I had never been moved before. Marie never cried. She didn’t care to show emotion. She was hardened in some ways, her life being a replica of my own.
“He’s not different Ava, and I want you to realize that before you end up being exactly what we decided we never wanted to be.”
I could feel my own tears prick at my eyes, and knew I had to tell Ryker. I had to find out if Marie was right, and then, and only then would I make my choice on what to do.
“I have to tell him Marie.”
“Then tell him, but don’t get your hopes up expecting him to want you or that baby. It was a mistake Ava and he’ll make sure you realize that when it’s all over.” She leaves me with those words, standing in the hall, my hands shaking and my heart beating furiously. I clench my jaw holding the tears in all while hoping like hell that Ryker is better than that.
That he’s different than all the others.
***
When I walk into work the next morning I’m groggy feeling as if I haven’t slept a wink and I probably didn’t. There’s a stack of papers on my desk that need sorted and the looming secret inside me makes me feel nauseous. I don’t want to see Ryker today, because seeing him makes me think of all the things that Marie said last night.
What if she’s right?
The fear of the unknown is what kills me. I’m not only hiding a secret inside me but one that could change the way things are between Ryker, and I. If he finds out I’m the woman from the bar, I’m almost certain I won’t have a job to come back to.
Making good on getting to the office early I head into the break room and start brewing Ryker a pot of coffee. He likes it dark with a dash of whiskey in it, that much I’ve learned. I daydream through the mundane process wondering if maybe he’ll be okay with me being his mystery woman. The way he talked to Reed about our one night together all but tells me he enjoyed it and at the very least wanted to know who I was.
“Did you get your problem taken care of?” Andi sneers at me, as she grabs the pot of coffee and pours herself a cup. I clench my fists together, staring her down. I want to tell her that coffee isn’t for her but that’s the last thing on my mind.
She’s judging me, and based on something she has no proof of.
She’s far from perfect, I know that, but looking at her right now as she stares down at me, makes it harder for me to remember, even more so when she’s dressed to impressed, her hair and even eyeliner perfect as hell.
“Problem? I don’t have a problem. Well actually I do have a problem…” I growl. “I brewed that coffee for Ryker, not you.” Andi doesn’t seem to care, figures. She smiles, perfectly white, straight teeth reflect back at me.
“Oh…” She blinks, a pout forming on her lips. “I’m sorry. I thought this coffee was for everyone, but I’ll make sure to let Ryker know all about the thing his new intern is complaining about.” My face deadpans.
What a bitch!
“Tell Ryker whatever you want. I don’t really give a rats ass.” I hiss, pouring Ryker his cup, and heading out of break room. I catch the smirk on her face as I walk out and hope she didn’t actually start a rumor about Ryker and I, especially after she found me sick in the bathroom a couple times. I push the thoughts away, knowing I have to go and see Ryker shortly anyway. I can’t let her interfere in my thoughts. She’s nothing, no one that matters anyway.
I smile at the few co-workers that are just walking into the office and stop outside Ryker’s door, noticing he’s on the phone. His body is stiff, and his hand scrubs at one side of his face. He’s handsome as hell like the love child of Ryan Gosling and Gerard Butler if the two hunks could have a baby together. Just watching him has my already crazy hormones making parts of my body sit up and take notice.
He waves me in when he notices me standing on the threshold and my heart beat slams into my ears as I grow closer to him. My body awakens like the first rays of sun that land against a blooming flower.
Stormy blue eyes suck me in as I place his mug on the desk, the smoldering fire in them making me shiver. What is he thinking? He rubs a hand against his looks-carved-from-stone jaw, and I find myself wanting to lick it. Hell, I’ll be happy if I just get to taste his lips.
Sucking in a calming breath, I try to calm my wacky ass hormones down before I
jump him on his desk.
“I’ll have my assistant set up a meeting for later this week.” He mutters into the phone before issuing a good bye. He hangs up his cell and puts it down on the desk, his hands are bigger, stronger looking than they ever appeared to be before.
“I got you coffee. There wasn’t any whiskey in the break room so I figured you had your own stash.” I smile feeling the heat creep up into my cheeks even though I haven’t said anything embarrassing yet.
His pink tongue darts out over his full lips and suddenly I’m envisioning myself kissing those rough lips again. The way he made me my body light up with need is something I still haven’t forgotten. I want him, I want him so badly it almost hurts.
“Are you feeling better today?”
I bite my bottom lip, nodding my head yes. It’s the perfect opening to tell him why I feel crappy, but I’m too chicken. “I feel great.” I lie, even though it’s only a partial lie. The morning sickness has eased, at least for today, but the anxiousness hasn’t.
“Good.” He goes quiet, and I think he looks like he might be nervous. Seeing him look unsure makes me extremely curious about what he’s going to say next. “I want you to have lunch with me today. Nothing fancy, nothing over the top. Just lunch. Right here. In my office.”
I can’t do anything but stare at him. Ryker looks so out of his element, and I can tell he’s worried I’m going to turn him down. “Like a date?” I blurt out. unable to stop myself from doing so. A devilish grin pulls at Ryker’s lips, making my knees a little weak.
Does he even know how fucking gorgeous he is?
“Yes, like a date. I’ll come out to get you closer to noon.” He stares at me with determination and I know there will be no getting out of this. I could say no, even though I really don’t want too though I doubt that would stop him. He would just come out and get me.
“Okay, great.” I smile wringing my hands together nervously.
“Do I make you nervous Ava?” He asks as I turn around to walk out of his office. I ponder my response for a few seconds.
“You don’t make me nervous, you make my heart nervous and that’s what scares me.” I’m shocked I just put that out there, so I don’t stick around and give him a chance to respond. Practically running out of his office, I get to my desk and sit down, taking deep breaths in an attempt to calm my breathing.
I can do this. I can tell Ryker who I am and that I’m carrying his baby inside me.
Can’t I?
Chapter Eighteen
Ryker
I want her. I so fucking want her. Yeah, I want to be inside her body as deep as I can get, but I want to be inside her heart too. I want to bury myself deep inside her like she is in me. Her words play on repeat in my mind.
“You don’t make me nervous, you make my heart nervous.”
She thinks I will break her heart? Knowing she thinks the worst of me terrifies me. I don’t know how I’m going to get her to give me a chance after the asshole way I treated her before. I’ve never once regretted the way I treat women, but since meeting her, all I do is feel horrible for the way I’ve treated her.
Lunch is planned to a perfect T, because I’ve decided today will be the day I tell her I knew who she is. There’s the basket full of goodies they delivered to my office earlier, with chocolate covered strawberries, meat and cheese trays, and crackers; just to name a few things. After making sure she has a decent lunch, I’m going to make sure she knows how much she means to me and that I’m not mad that she didn’t tell me who she is.
The hours went by at a snail’s pace and since I had a lot of paperwork that needed sorted, faxed, and documents signed I was in my office most of the day while she was out on the floor.
I decided to call her in early, the need to be closer to her consumed me. I didn’t want to just jump her, but I needed to kiss her. I needed to feel her hands against my skin. She’d chosen me as the man she wanted to give herself too and I wanted to make certain she knew I’d take care of her.
“Ava.” I called her name, watching as her eyes lifted from the paperwork she was sorting. Those dark whiskey eyes held more than one secret I was certain. We hadn’t met under the most conventional of terms, me losing my father, and her going through her own things but I was going to make it worth it for her.
She stood, smoothing out the wrinkles on her skirt and walked over to me, her legs wobbly. I could see the anxious look in her eyes as she entered my office. I closed the door closing us inside together.
I had the basket on the desk, and a blanket on the floor with a spread of food. Champagne and the glasses rested next to the food and I knew she was shocked when she took in the sight of all that I had done.
“You did all this?” Her gasp was audible and it made me smile.
“I sure did. I wanted lunch to be perfect for you.” I held my hands together even as they itch to reach out and touch her creamy white skin. Her eyes scan over each object and I swear I see tears well in her eyes.
“You didn’t have to do this Ryker. You don’t owe me anything.”
“I know I don’t and I didn’t do this because I owe you something. I did this because I wanted too. Because you deserve the best.” She shakes her head softly, bright blonde curls break free from behind her ears, and I cross the small space that separates us. I brush them from her eyes, and cup her by the cheek, my thumb running across her lips.
They’re soft, plump, and tempt me in a way no other womans lips have tempted me before. I feel the shiver that my touch brings her and I want to feel it again and again. I want to run my fingers through her hair and feel the beat of her heart against my own.
I want to own her, to make her feel the way I’ve felt every single day since she left me that night in the hotel room alone.
“You’re everything Ava...everything…” I whisper softly leaning into her face. I can hear her heavy breathing, and see the dilation of her eyes. She wants me to kiss her just as badly as I want too and I decide then that I will.
Leaning in until I’m a breath away from her lips I whisper, “Can I kiss you?” She doesn’t say anything for a long second, her eyes moving from mine and down to my lips and back again. It’s then that she nods her head yes, her gulp noticeable.
I take her nod for permission and press my lips against hers ever so gently. A moan of pleasure escapes both of us filling the room with noise. Electricity flows through my veins slamming into my groin making my cock harder than steel at the softness of her body nestled against mine.
I feel her small hands mapping out my arms, and making their way up my chest. They blaze a path of heat, and need that only she can extinguish.
I want her. I need her. She’s a hunger I’ll never be able to feed.
Her fingers grip onto my arms and I hold her, my lips devouring hers. I kiss her with a furious need, an all consuming want.
She pulls away slightly, her cheeks pink and her eyes soft. Her features are fragile, so fragile I’m afraid if I make the wrong move I might break some part of her.
“Ryker we can’t do this… I have to…” She trails off as I grip her chin in my hands forcing her eyes to meet mine. I know she’s scared, worried, terrified that something bad is going to happen. It’s in the way she’s begun to lock up, the walls around her heart are rising and I have to tell her I know. I have too.
“I already know.” I let the words out with ease, feeling as if an elephant has been lifted off my chest. Ava’s eyes go wide, and she tries to pull away from me, her body go stiff like a rabbit that’s been caught in a trap.
“What...What do you know?” She stammers, panic easing into her features. I pull her against my chest, feeling the frantic beat of her heart.
I release a breath and then start,“I know who you are. I know that you’re the girl of my dreams. The woman from the bar, from the night in the hotel. I know it’s you and I can’t hide that I know it any longer.”
She squirms in
my arms, and panic consumes me for a second. What if she isn’t the girl from the bar?
“How...how do you know…” A burst of laughter escapes me.
“I know Ava. I know because I feel it in my chest when you grow near. I feel this electricity flow through my veins. I feel this need to be wherever you’re without any understanding of why.” Ava looks as if she doesn’t believe me and I can understand why, but I need her too.
“You have nothing to be worried about Ava.” I hold her cheeks in my hands and stare deeply into her eyes, feeling that connection snap into place. It’s as if I’ve found my soulmate, the other half to my heart.
“Ryker…” Ava starts and before either of us can get a word out the door to my office is being opened. Reed’s big ass head popping inside.
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything but Fallon is in labor. I just thought I would tell you.” The smile on Reed’s face is intoxicating and I find myself smiling right along with him.
“Congratulations brother.” I exclaim.
“Do you want to come up to the hospital with me? I’m so nervous.” I nod, releasing Ava, but not before pressing my lips to hers again.
“Do you want to come with us?” I ask her, but she shakes her head, a shyness filling her features as Reed looms in the doorway.
“No. I have a ton of work to do, but thank you for the offer. Congratulations Reed.” She gives him a small smile and I hate how she seems more like that timid rabbit all over again.
“Thank you Ava.”
“This conversation isn’t over, okay?” Her eyes divert to the floor but she has to know she won’t be getting off the hook that easily. I’ve got plans for us, but first I have to make her see how much she means to me.
“Come on...let’s go.” Reed’s voice rises a bit and I know he’s panicked. His wife is in labor and he’s still here at the office.
I turn on my heels and grab my coat off the coat rack. Ava doesn’t move from the spot I left her in and as I head towards the door that Reed just disappeared from I look at her over my shoulder and say,“This isn’t the end Ava. Not by a long shot.”
