It was true. Nick said that if I took other drugs with the one he gave me, it wouldn’t work. So far, I had only drunk alcohol since starting my new drug journey.
‘That’s really good.’ Cancer patted my shoulder.
I was tempted to snap. Instead, I turned away when she glanced at my shaking hands. My dark jacket had been dry cleaned. It was almost stiff as I slipped it on.
‘Let’s go,’ I said, saluting Gemini as we left.
Cancer walked ahead of me. She wore a little black dress with a smart jacket. Her hair was down past her shoulders. The sound of a sniffle came back to me as she led us out of the kitchen, down the steps and onto the pavement.
Scorpio waited with the car. We had converted it from an old post office van. I was gutted when we had to change the colour from red to black to be less suspicious.
‘I’ve got to go to work, so I thought I’d drop you off on the way,’ he said, running his hand over his soft blonde hair.
We climbed in, not speaking as Scorpio drove us to the church. He was a much better driver than Leo but not as good as me.
‘Thank you,’ we called when we finally got to our destination.
I stood for a moment, watching the people file through the church doors. I didn’t know any of them, yet I had been sleeping with their loved one. A week was so insignificant to most people. It was a splash in time. However, Sophie had made a huge impact on me in that week. She had taken notice and accepted me. It felt crappy knowing that I would never get to know her. It was gut wrenching to know that it was my fault that she died.
‘What are we doing here?’ I asked Cancer.
She took my hand and squeezed as a couple went by us. ‘We’re paying our respects,’ she hissed.
Shaking her off, I went to turn away from the church. She grabbed my shoulder and spun me back.
‘You have to face this. For once in your life, face up to reality. She died for you, so you will pay your respects.’
Her words made me freeze. She died for me. But why? Did Nick really think she was my twin flame? It was a question I hadn’t thought to ask him. Not that twin flames were real, but he seemed to think they were.
‘You’re right.’
Her eyes widened. I rarely admitted when someone else was right. Because it was a rare occurrence. All my life, I had known most things, but the more I got into Nick’s psyche, the more I doubted everything I had conditioned myself to believe.
‘I wish I had that recorded. Will you say it again so I can record it on my phone?’
She linked her arm through mine as we went inside the church.
‘Don’t push it.’
Sophie’s parents approached and gushed about how Sophie went on about us the week before she died. They sobbed when Cancer told them a tale about how they had met. They turned to me. I couldn’t speak. What could I say? I was banging your daughter?
‘Taurus, I know you didn’t know Sophie for long, but she was smitten with you.’
I nodded. My throat closed, which made me cough. A car pulled up in front of the church.
‘She’s here,’ her mother said, grasping her husband’s arm.
We went to our seats as the coffin was brought in. My head was fuzzy. The music played, speeches were spoken, but through it all, I asked myself why. Why did people have to die? Where was Sophie now? Why did I have to be lumbered with a crazy family and enemies?
‘That was nice,’ Cancer said as we left the church and followed the procession to the graveyard.
She wiped at her red eyes with a tissue. I hadn’t even noticed her cry. She had known Sophie for a lot longer than I had. I should have been more supportive.
‘Taurus, who’s that?’ she asked, gripping my forearm.
Following the line of her gaze, I caught sight of a man in a black outfit. Sophie’s killer. He was hiding behind a tree in the far corner of the cemetery. How dare he show his face at his victim’s funeral? I squeezed Cancer’s hand and went to move across the grass. She pulled me back, shaking her head quickly.
‘I have to go and kill him,’ I hissed into her ear.
People glanced at us as we stared each other out. My sister was right of course. I couldn’t make a run for the man in the middle of a funeral.
‘Matt’s here, too,’ Cancer said, plastering a fake smile on her face.
Searching the area with my gaze, I spotted Matt beside the church. What was he doing here? My temper simmered. My skin heated. I was ready to explode. When I saw Nick again, I was going to lose it. We were at a funeral for goodness sake!
‘We need to sneak off as soon as she’s in the ground,’ I whispered so that only Cancer could hear.
Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. ‘You’re as bad as them!’
She pushed me as a sob escaped her. People had stopped trying to be subtle and now stared at us. I hadn’t meant to offend my sister. It was just how I was. Sophie was no longer with us. We had to get on with life.
‘Are you really that heartless?’ her words were whispered.
My chest constricted. I tried to pull air into my lungs as an image of Sophie running to catch up with me came into my mind. I swallowed hard as we stood next to the hole that would hold her body. I had never had to bury anyone before. I was lucky to have reached twenty one without saying goodbye to anyone.
‘She was really into you,’ Cancer said.
Was she trying to get me to cry? Would she take pleasure in seeing me reduced to tears? She was going the right way about it if she did.
More words were said as Sophie’s coffin was lowered into the ground. I blinked as I tried to clear the vision of her blank eyes. The memory of the life leaving her body was etched into my mind. It had been a wild week. I was sure that I would have fallen for Sophie if I’d had the chance.
‘Ashes to ashes…’ the vicar called.
My heart hardened as the people that were closest to Sophie threw roses onto her coffin. When it was my turn, I watched the red flower tumble and fall into the hole. As I looked up, my gaze shot straight to the tree and locked with her killer. He took a step back, but otherwise didn’t respond. I was coming for him and he knew.
‘Let’s go.’ Cancer tugged my arm.
We said goodbye to Sophie’s parents and made our way towards Matt.
‘I’m going to find the b—’
‘No, we need to see Matt. We need an update on what’s going on with Nick.’
My cheeks heated when she looked up at me. I knew exactly what was going on with our enemy, but I didn’t say anything.
‘I know it’s not a good day but life doesn’t stop for us.’
I nodded and let her lead me to the man that had caused the problem in the first place.
‘I’m so sorry for your loss,’ Matt said as we came to stand in front of him.
I glanced over my shoulder. The man that had killed Sophie was gone.
‘So you should be. If it wasn’t for you, she’d be here.’
Cancer slapped my arm. ‘Taurus, don’t!’
‘He’s right though, isn’t he?’ He only had eyes for Cancer.
They were both stiff around each other. She watched him, glancing away when he made eye contact.
‘How’s your wife?’ I asked, breaking the silence.
He fidgeted with the sleeve of his shirt and looked at the ground when Cancer hit me again.
‘She’s safe,’ he replied.
I shook my head as I took a step away from them. Watching the people by the new grave, I wished for a normal life. It would have been so much easier if I had gone to school, got a job, married and had kids. Instead, I had enemies before I was even born. I had a lifetime mission that I didn’t even believe in and siblings that were just plain irritating.
‘Why are you here, Matt? We need to forget about each other. You have a life. Responsibilities.’
I heard the choke in Cancer’s voice. How it must be to love someone that wasn’t available. How guilty she must feel for stea
ling the affections of someone that was already married.
‘I don’t want you to come to harm because of me. I didn’t get the chance to tell you when we last met…’ He paused, sighing harshly. ‘I’ve left my wife. We’ve been unhappy for many years. We married very young.’
I shook my head again. Oh, how typical of the man. I didn’t know that much about life. I had been pretty sheltered, but I knew that old trick. Had seen it on television shows and films.
‘That doesn’t change anything. What do you want from me?’
A new respect for my sister formed at her words. I had expected her to melt and go all girly on him.
‘I…don’t know,’ he admitted. ‘I thought we could—’
‘You are joking?’ I interrupted.
‘Taurus!’ Cancer snapped.
I held up my hands and moved away from them. She was right, it was none of my business what she did.
My phone beeped. Taking it out of my jacket pocket, I read the message that had come through.
I hope today wasn’t too hard.
Kerry was sweet. She had wished me luck the night before.
‘We need to go,’ Cancer said, storming past me.
I glanced back at Matt. He looked frustrated. What had he expected? Did he really think she was going to fall into his arms?
‘What was that about?’ I asked.
I didn’t usually care about other people’s business but Matt was one of Nick’s men. Or used to be. I was still unsure what had happened between them.
‘I’m not really sure to be honest,’ Cancer said, linking her arm through mine as we walked away from the church.
Her tone was quiet. Her eyes were wet. She sniffed before she shook her head and smiled up at me. She was tiny. Her frame was half my size.
‘It’s time to move on. From Sophie, from Matt. Let’s promise each other that we’ll help to find each other’s soulmate.’
My eyebrows rose of their own accord, which made her laugh. She was and always would be a sentimental little thing. I had never been close to her before, but our shared secret brought us together.
‘I can’t promise anything, but I’ll help you if I can.’ It was the best I could do. How did I tell her that it was rubbish? Her eyes sparkled up at me. Expecting me to play along with the whole twin flame blah blah—
‘I shouldn’t be encouraging you, but you know what we need, don’t you?’
My blunt fingernails scratched at my scalp. My hair was starting to grow out, which meant I needed to get the clippers out. ‘What’s that?’
‘To get raving drunk!’
I agreed wholeheartedly. Nick had told me not to go back for a few days. I had been fine with his command at first. The more I thought about how much control he had over me, the more it wound me up. What made him think he could get me to do what he wanted?
‘Kerry’s at the pub. She asked me if I wanted to join her. Let’s go!’
I allowed her to drag me to a waiting taxi. As we climbed in, I thought about my life. Cancer was right. It was time to move on. Time to change. I couldn’t sit on my arse doing nothing anymore. All I wanted to do was get high. However, it wasn’t going to help me.
‘We need to celebrate Sophie’s life!’ Cancer declared as the taxi pulled up outside the pub down the road from home.
‘Typical. You bring me to the pub I first met her.’ I laughed.
Cancer screwed up her face as tears came into her eyes. I put my arm around her as we went inside. Kerry spotted us instantly and came over.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said, taking Cancer from me and leading her to a table.
The pub was empty. It was the middle of the day. I ordered drinks, including a round of shots. If we were going to get drunk, we may as well get hammered.
‘Why am I not surprised to see you in here?’
Gemini slapped my back as he added his drink order to my tab. He had snuck in behind us, leading a woman along with him. She was tall, busty and a lot older than him.
‘Can’t a man toast his lover when she dies?’
He went still, the cheeky smile falling away from his face. The woman with him giggled nervously and took one of our shots. I glared at her, so she put it back on the bar.
‘I’m sorry, mate, I—’
‘Don’t bother,’ I snapped.
Kerry slid up next to me and collected our drinks. ‘Thanks, Taurus.’
The distraction broke the silence between my brother and me. He coughed and nodded, leading his date to the other end of the pub.
‘I’m sure Gemini didn’t mean it like that,’ Cancer said, patting the seat between her and Kerry.
I fell onto it, sighing as my butt hit the cushion. My brother was an idiot, but he didn’t mean any harm. Everyone judging my addiction was getting old. If anyone else said anything to me about drugs or drink, I promised myself that I would knock them out.
‘Let’s toast to Sophie. I didn’t know her, but she seemed like a great girl.’ Kerry lifted one of the shots.
We joined her in her toast, downing the drink in one.
‘She was a great girl. Although, she wouldn’t want us to be sad.’ Cancer picked up the next shot without waiting and threw that down her throat, too.
She wanted to drown out much more than Sophie’s death. Matt had got under her skin. I could tell by the way she kept looking at her phone. Did he have her phone number? If so, he must have given it to her when they’d escaped from Nick.
‘When my mum died, my nana told me that a good way to move forward after losing someone, was to promise to do something in their honour. I promised my mum that I would get through college and become a hairdresser.’ Kerry smiled at me.
I blinked, seeing her for the first time since I had come in the pub. Her hair was loose around her face. The blonde was darker next to Cancer.
‘That’s a great idea!’ Cancer exclaimed hugging her friend.
The tequila burned my throat as I chucked it in my mouth. It was a bit fanciful, but if it made Cancer happy, I would indulge.
‘I promise Sophie that I will write the book I’ve always wanted to write.’ She downed her drink and thumped the glass down on the table.
‘What about you?’ Kerry asked me.
I glanced at Kerry. She smiled at me. I had forgotten that she knew my secret. She knew what I had almost done all those years ago. She wasn’t judging me.
‘I promise to…’
What could I do? My life was a pile of crap. I looked down at my glass, watching the bubbles of the lager lift to the surface. What was a worthy enough pledge to the girl that had died because of me?
The others stayed quiet as I thought. I could feel their eyes on me as I contemplated the biggest promise I had ever made. I looked at Cancer. Her gaze was expectant. I hadn’t looked at her properly for a very long time. Images of her playing with Pisces when we were children came into my mind. Aries hitting Leo and hiding behind me played through my head. My siblings were always there on my birthday, celebrating with me, no matter what.
‘I promise to…’
Nick’s flashback consumed my vision. He had been staring at the crazy man when he had claimed that they had to keep evil on the planet. My chest almost exploded with memory. I closed my eyes and put my head in my hands as fragments of something unfamiliar tried to worm its way out of my memory.
‘Are you okay?’ Kerry’s voice filtered through the rushing sound that filled my ears. A hand landed on my back. The soft touch was soothing as it broke through the confusion that raced through my head.
‘I’m fine.’ I grunted as the weird head rush left me.
My body was calm. The alcohol I had consumed was working its way over my muscles, relaxing them. I patted my trouser pocket to make sure the small baggie of white powder was still there. One more time. I would get high on my own, without Nick. I needed to know one more thing before I could leave the past behind and plan my future.
‘I promise to stop lying to myself and othe
rs. I promise to give up drugs.’
The others stared at me, their mouths hanging open.
‘That’s not an attractive look, ladies,’ I joked, lifting my beer. ‘To Sophie.’
They shook themselves and slowly started to smile. ‘To Sophie!’ they chorused before we downed our drinks in one.
Chapter Seventeen
‘I know this is a bit weird, but I have to do something and I need someone here.’
I undid my jeans and let them drop to the floor. Kerry’s eyes widened as she took a step back.
‘Sorry!’ I jumped forward to stop her from leaving. Not that she was leaving. I tripped on my jeans and landed on the floor at her feet.
‘What are you doing?’ She laughed.
I sat up and looked at her. It was a good job she’d stepped back quickly. She wore a short flowy summer dress. I wouldn’t have been able to resist a peak if she had stayed where she was.
‘This is going to sound mad. I need to take drugs one last time. I can’t go into it. I just need someone with me for safety reasons.’
Her eyes were so wide I wondered if they would pop out of her head. She didn’t run for the door like I thought she would, but put her hands on her hips.
‘You’re the only person I trust enough to ask.’
Her shoulders relaxed. ‘What about the others?’
I shook my head. Not one of them would stand by and let me take drugs. I was still unsure if Kerry would, but I had to ask her. I was a little apprehensive at taking the white powder on my own.
‘This is the last time I’m taking it. It’s for a specific reason.’
She lowered her hands from her hips. The frown didn’t leave her face.
‘I don’t understand why you need me here. You’re a regular drug taker. You know how it works.’
I scooted back and leant against my bed. The door was locked. Gemini was with his lady friend and Aquarius was at his day job. If the timing of the last few doses was right, I would be out for a few hours. I wanted Kerry to keep an eye on me that was all.
‘This is a different type of drug. I hallucinate on it.’ It was the best way I could describe it without sounding too airy fairy. In fact, it was probably exactly what was happening. That’s why I wanted to control my own trip.
[Zodiac Twin Flames 01.0 - 03.0] Boxed Set Page 42
