We Can Work It Out

by Elizabeth Eulberg

  “Of course.” Diane started talking about other things that needed to be done while I desperately tried to drink the water in front of me. I probably should’ve stayed home. Usually, I wouldn’t have minded missing a few days of school, but there was exciting news about the dance-a-thon or new clubs every day. I didn’t want to miss a minute of it. A horrible cold wasn’t going to drag me away.

  I felt sluggish as everybody got up from the lunch table. I was making my way to my locker when Hilary ran up to me. “Hey, Pen, I was hoping I could talk to you for a minute.”

  “Of course,” I said, even though every word hurt my throat.

  “I didn’t know when a good time would be to talk about this, but I’ve met somebody.” She looked down at the floor. “And, I don’t know, I thought I should tell you that I really like him and want to ask him to come with us to Prom.”

  I blew my nose loudly. “That’s great. Who’s the lucky guy?”

  Hilary’s face glowed at the thought. “His name is Glen. We met at work. He goes to school in …” I tried my best to concentrate on what she was saying, but there was a buzzing noise in my ears. I slowed down my pace as a warm sensation made its way through my body.

  I tried to steady myself by placing a hand on the wall.

  Then I blacked out.

  “WAKE UP, PENNY!” A VOICE CALLED out to me.

  My eyes tried to open, but they felt so heavy. I snuck a quick peek and saw the school nurse standing over me. Tracy and Diane were behind her, looking really worried.

  “Wh-wha-wha …” I tried to talk, but my mouth was dry.

  The nurse held up a glass of water with a straw. I drank greedily from it.

  “Small sips,” she said. “I think you’re dehydrated, so you need to take small sips so your body has a chance to properly absorb the liquid.”

  I ignored her and kept drinking. I was taking in the room and tried to remember how I’d gotten there.

  “You fainted,” the nurse started to explain.

  “And you scared the crap out of us,” Tracy continued. “I told you to go home. You look horrible, Pen. You’ve been running yourself ragged and it’s caught up with you.”

  Diane nudged Tracy. “That’s enough.”

  “Sorry.” Tracy gave me a weak smile. “I’m really worried about you, but I know that you’ll be getting an earful from your mom.”

  And at the mention of her name, Mom burst through the door of the nurse’s office. “What on earth happened?” She listened patiently to the nurse but began checking my vital signs, wanting to give the second opinion.

  Dad came running in a few minutes later. There was a lot of discussion among my parents and the nurse. I heard the words exhaustion, dehydration, and rest. I also heard Mom repeatedly say that she’d told me to take it easy.

  Tracy came over to my bedside as the grown-ups continued their conference together in the corner.

  “What happened?” I asked, still trying to piece it all together.

  “You were talking to Hilary, and she said that all of a sudden you turned white and just collapsed. I was a few feet behind you and saw you go down, but assumed that you’d tripped or something.” Tracy took my cold hand in her warm one. “Bruce was with me and he bolted over — that’s when I knew something was really wrong. Bruce, Hilary, and I all tried to get you to wake up, but you weren’t responding, besides some incoherent mumbling — you know, typical you.” Tracy tried to play it off lightly, for which I was grateful. “Bruce picked you up and took you to the nurse’s office.”

  “He did?” I was grateful to Bruce but also embarrassed that I’d been carried through the hallway in front of everybody.

  Tracy nodded, looking impressed. “Yeah, and pretty much the entire Club followed him. Everybody’s outside right now, wanting to know how you are. The office isn’t happy to have so many of us skipping class, but we kind of took a stand. Braddock seems annoyed, but he didn’t force us to go back to class. We all want to make sure you’re okay.”

  “The Club’s outside waiting?” I was touched by their unwavering support for me.

  Diane came over to the bed. “Of course they are. Bruce as well.” She exchanged a glance with Tracy. “And Ryan.”

  Why was I so surprised that Ryan would be outside? I’d fainted in front of practically the entire school.

  I groaned at the thought, but my reaction caused everybody in the room to panic.

  “What’s wrong? What’s the matter?” Mom came over and grabbed my wrist to check my pulse.

  “I have a headache,” I responded, which was partly true.

  Mom reached in her purse and pulled out some aspirin and more cold medicine. It looked like she’d raided the pharmacy before she’d left. I obediently took the pills as Mom instructed. Tracy left to get my books.

  “You’re going home and staying there for the rest of the week,” Mom commanded. I was so tired that all I could do was agree with her. I was only going to miss a couple days of school, and that would give me some extra time to work on the dance-a-thon.

  As if she could read my mind, Mom shot me a warning look. “And you are to rest, Penny Lane. You can do homework, but that’s it. And, Diane, I think the Club needs to meet somewhere else this weekend. Penny Lane needs her rest. Period.”

  Diane nodded her head vigorously. She knew when the only choice you had was to agree with my mom and agree quickly.

  My head began to pulsate when I sat up. I had to steady myself. Dad came over to help me up. “Be careful, kiddo. Do you want me to pick you up?”

  I shook my head, not wanting to appear even weaker to everybody. I waited a few seconds for the pulsing to subside, and then tried to sit up again. I had to drink some juice before I was allowed to leave.

  The nurse glanced at the door. “You have quite the adoring public waiting for you.” She touched my shoulder gently, as if I was a breakable china doll.

  “Thanks.” I finally stood up, and Dad steadied me with his arm wrapped around my waist. “I think I’m okay, Dad. Only tired. I’ll go to sleep as soon as we get home,” I promised.

  Once the door was opened, the quiet whispers on the other side suddenly stopped. I felt immense pressure to appear to be completely fine, although by the concerned looks everybody in the room had been giving me, I was sure there was little I could do to fake the appearance of being well.

  I plastered a smile on my face as I turned the corner and saw the worried looks coming from the Club. A few members of the office staff looked annoyed as they started filling out late slips.

  “Hey, everyone. Sorry for the scare,” I said. “I’m going home to sleep for about four days, but then I’ll be back in fighting form.” I scanned each of their faces, this family that I had built up over the last six months. I gingerly made my way to the office exit, trying to make eye contact with each of them so they knew I was really okay. I was also searching for Ryan, but he wasn’t there.

  My eyes settled on Bruce. “Thanks so much. I hope I didn’t hurt your back.”

  He shook his head. “No worries. I’m glad to see you’re feeling better.”

  “Yeah, thanks. I hope nobody gets in trouble for skipping class.”

  “Please,” Tracy said. She held out her hands like she was balancing the options. “Go to class or be there for you — like there was a choice.”

  At that comment, the office secretary cleared her throat and started handing out slips for people to finally go back to class.

  Dad put all my stuff into Mom’s car, and I went home with her. I rested my eyes during the drive and couldn’t wait to collapse in the privacy of my own bedroom. I felt so heavy as I walked up the stairs. I didn’t even bother taking off my jeans before I got under the covers.

  Mom knocked lightly on the door. “I brought you some juice and crackers.” She sat at the edge of my bed. “Are you okay? And I mean with everything that’s been going on lately. You’ve seemed so distracted and driven by this dance-a-thon, I don’t know if you�
��ve really had time to deal with …” Mom studied my face, wondering how far she should push me.

  I curled up onto my side just as a well-timed yawn took control of me. “It’s this stupid cold, and yes, I’ve been pushing myself a little too much. But I’ll … get … some …”

  And then I let sleep overtake me. I drifted off to a place where I didn’t have any responsibilities, where I didn’t have to pretend to be happy when I didn’t feel like it, where I wasn’t heartbroken.

  Usually, if anybody slept past nine in our house, even on the weekend, Mom would wake them up. Her attitude had always been that if you sleep in, you’re wasting the day away.

  Who knew that all it would take to let you sleep in was to pass out at school. So she let me be and I slept, and slept, and then slept some more. It was amazing how much better twenty hours of sleep could make me feel. And I took Mom’s advice and didn’t do any work besides the occasional homework assignment the following day.

  I was watching TV in the basement when I heard the doorbell ring Thursday afternoon. I was able to convince Mom and Dad that I could be left alone, so I slogged up the stairs and opened the door before looking to see who it was. Had I known the identity of the person on the other side, I would’ve at least tried to fix my messy ponytail, or run upstairs to try to not look like the homeless person I was presently impersonating.

  “Hey,” Ryan said sheepishly.

  “Hey,” I replied. “What are you …” My immediate reaction was that I was seeing things.

  He held up a bag. “I brought you some stuff.”

  I glanced at the clock in the living room — it was a little before two. “Shouldn’t you be in history right now?”

  “I’m at a doctor’s appointment.” He winked at me.

  “You’re skipping class?” I asked. “And your downward trajectory continues …”

  He frowned slightly at my comment. “Do you want me to give you the bag or are you going to let me in?”

  I stood there staring at him. I couldn’t believe he was here.

  “I thought you hated me,” I blurted out before I could stop myself. I blamed the exhaustion.

  Ryan shook his head. “I don’t hate you, Penny. I’m mad at you, yes, but I don’t hate you.”

  “Fair enough.” I maneuvered so he could come inside. Ryan had every right to be mad at me for hurting him. He also should’ve hated me for everything that I’d done to him, but he didn’t. That thought alone made me feel significantly better.

  Ryan walked over to the kitchen and began unloading the bag. “So there’s Gatorade to help rehydrate, ice cream to help with your sore throat, and” — he unwrapped a plastic bag, and as soon as the smell hit my nose, my stomach automatically began to growl — “cheese fries … because they’re cheese fries.”

  I nearly lunged at the fries, but instead took out two forks and began diving in with mine. “Do you want any?” I said with a full mouth.

  “I already ate. Plus, you need it more than me.”

  “Thank you,” I said before pulling an extra cheesy fry from the plate.

  “Oh, I almost forgot.” He reached into his messenger bag and handed me Abbey the Walrus, my childhood stuffed animal that I’d given to his stepsister. “From Katie. She wants you to get better soon.”

  I hugged my old stuffed friend, not the least bit embarrassed for Ryan to witness my affection toward an inanimate object. I set Abbey on my lap as I continued to eat my fries. It should’ve been awkward to be so close to Ryan, especially since it had been tense between us. However, it felt comforting to have him here.

  It took only a few minutes to clean the plate and drink a glass of Gatorade.

  “How are you feeling?” Ryan asked while he nervously ran his fingers through his hair.

  “Better. I really appreciate this. Obviously.” I gestured at my empty plate.

  “You gave everybody a scare yesterday.” He paused. “Especially me. So I guess I was right.”

  “You were right?” What wasn’t Ryan right about? Except his obliviousness to the many ways I’d destroyed his life.

  “You were doing too much.”

  “I know, it’s so silly, I think I was …” I tried to find the right words to make everybody else feel better about what had happened to me. In the past twenty-four hours, most of my energy had been spent answering texts and IMs about my health.

  Ryan reached over and held my hand. I stared at our hands in shock. It was something I had gotten used to when we were still together, but now …

  He leaned forward. “This doesn’t let you off the hook for what you did, but all I want is for you to get better. I can’t help but feel a little guilty, since I’ve been so cold to you lately.”

  “Are you kidding me? The only person responsible for my fainting spell is me. As for us …” It was so weird to think of Ryan and I in terms of us. “I’ve been the one staying away from our lockers. I’ve been the one who’s been avoiding you. It’s been all my doing and all my fault,” I said, hoping he realized I wasn’t only talking about the past month. “Even you have to admit, I kind of deserved a little coldness.”

  “Yes, you did.” He laughed before giving my hand a squeeze. “I’ve really missed you, Penny.”

  He was so close to me that I felt woozy again, but not from exhaustion. Even though I’d been the one who ended it, I wasn’t ready for either of us to move on. I desperately wanted to tell him everything, beg him to take me back, but it didn’t change why we’d had to break up. Besides, I wasn’t in a state to add any more stress to my life before the dance-a-thon. I clearly wasn’t able to deal with everything on my plate as it was. Unless that plate had cheese fries.

  But the truth was that I missed him, too. I could avoid seeing him. I could overplan my days and weekends. But at the end of the day, nothing could fill the void of not having him here with me.

  “Ryan.” I didn’t know what I was going to say to him. I didn’t know what I could possibly say to him to let him know everything I was feeling.

  He moved over to the seat beside me, his blue eyes focused on mine the entire time. Unlike yesterday, when I’d felt so distant and removed from my surroundings, this time there was an excited buzz around me. My body tingled with him being so close, my awareness heightened. I kept trying to think of what to say to him, but I was completely at a loss. All I wanted to do was to take him in. I’d kept my distance this past month, but my body was reacting with him so close.

  He pulled my hand that was wrapped in his closer to him. I instinctually reached for him, and before I could process what we were doing, his lips were on mine. He pulled me into him, and I put my arm around his neck. It was as if his kiss was the answer for what was truly ailing me.

  I had no idea if we were kissing for seconds, minutes, or hours. All I knew was that I didn’t want it to end. I didn’t want to pull away and face the harsh reality of the price he’d be forced to pay for being with me. Then I heard the sound of the garage door opening. I silently cursed whoever was coming home.

  “God, I missed that,” Ryan said breathlessly, his hands still around my waist.

  “Me, too,” I admitted.

  We quickly kissed one more time before pushing ourselves away from each other. I took a long drink of water, hoping I could swallow down everything I wanted to tell him.

  The door opened from the garage. Mom stopped suddenly when she saw I had a visitor.

  “Oh, hello, Ryan. I didn’t realize you were here. I came by to check on Penny Lane.” She gave me a quick smile that grew when she saw my face. “You look so much better — you’ve got the color back in your face.” She came over and put the back of her hand against my cheek. “You’re really hot. Let me take your temperature.” She ran off to get the thermometer from her bathroom.

  I couldn’t meet Ryan’s eyes. We both knew what was causing my temperature to soar. I quickly stole a glance and saw that his cheeks were ruddy. “You should probably go before she decides to take your
temperature, too.”

  “It would be worth it.” He looked back to make sure the coast was clear and planted another quick kiss on me. “I’ll check in on you this weekend. Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

  “Yes.” I kissed him again before he got up to leave.

  I heard him talking to Mom in the hallway before she came back and shoved the thermometer into my mouth. “That was nice for him to stop by. I thought things were …” She raised her eyebrow at me. I was grateful the thermometer prevented me from giving a response.

  I had no idea where things were with us. All I did know was that I couldn’t deny how much his kiss meant to me and how quickly I wanted to get another one.

  I WAS FEELING SIGNIFICANTLY BETTER BY Friday night. It was most likely because of the countless numbers of hours I spent sleeping and the medicine I was taking, but all I could think of were those kisses with Ryan. He’d texted me throughout the day to see how I was doing. I kept telling him I needed more cheese fries.

  Diane and Tracy came over under the watchful eye of my mom, who didn’t want me “overdoing things.” So I stayed planted on the couch in the basement while Tracy and Diane kept me updated on the Club’s progress. I calmly listened to them, not once wanting to take over or become stressed.

  “Everything seems to be going well.” I pulled a blanket over me instead of reaching for the event binder that Diane had put within my reach. “Send everybody my love tomorrow. I’ll be back to one hundred percent by school on Monday.” I yawned. “Or at least ninety percent.”

  Diane handed me some water. “Do you want to pick a day to go Prom dress shopping when you’re better? Or we could delay it?”

  “No, that’s okay.” I took a sip of water to placate her. “I won’t worry about the dress until after the dance-a-thon.”

  “That’ll only give you a few days,” Diane reminded me.

  “Oh, well.” I repeated my new mantra: “It’ll work out.”

  “Of course it will — you can make anything look hawt.” Tracy raised her eyebrow salaciously. “We’ll also take care of the carpooling for Prom. We’ve got some more people joining us.”