Once in a Blue Moon
Page 20
“A surprise?” Jessica swung around. Her eyes glowing with anger. Laney froze. “You’re in the middle of the woods, naked with a guy you’ve known for a few weeks. A virtual stranger.”
Her words dripped with accusation, and Laney’s insides twisted, panic racing through her veins. She’d never heard her sister-in-law sound like that before.
“It’s not like that,” she said, searching for the words to explain it. She sucked in a deep breath. “We… I knew Adam before I met Simon. We dated.”
Jessica’s gaze swept from Laney across to Adam as an impenetrable wall built up between them.
“All this time and you never thought to mention that you knew him? That you dated him? I don’t understand. Why didn’t you tell me? Did Simon know?” The words were laced with hurt.
“No,” she whispered as shame slithered around her like a snake.
“You didn’t tell him?” Jessica flinched as if she’d been slapped, and too late Laney realized what a mistake she’d just made. Why hadn’t she just kept her mouth shut? And her clothes on?
“It’s complicated.”
“My brother was the most uncomplicated person I know, so tell me, Laney, what possible reason would you have to hide the fact you once dated a famous—” Jessica said before going perfectly still. Something rippled through her, and her voice dropped. “You’re Nina, aren’t you?”
You’re Nina.
Not a question. An accusation.
The secret she’d spent the last ten years trying to avoid.
Biting pain seared her chest like an explosion, and the world began to spin. White spots danced in Laney’s vision, and her knees buckled. She stabbed her nails deep into her palm and forced her ragged breath to settle.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. But it’s—” She paused, trying desperately to push down the building panic.
“But what?” Jessica demanded, voice harsh.
“I didn’t mean for you to find out this way.” The light rain continued to fall, soft like snowflakes. She licked her lip, fighting back the dark tendrils of dread snaking through her limbs. “You’ve been trying to set me up for the last six months. How is this any different?”
“If you can’t tell the difference, then answer me this. Why are you sneaking around? Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you keep it a secret from my brother?” Jessica took an unsteady step back as silence rushed in to fill the space where she’d been standing. Her emotions were a whirlpool whipping up inside.
Because it would make it real.
Because I’d be one step further away from Simon.
Because I don’t trust Adam to stay—
Her insides felt hollowed out as the bitter irony clattered through her. Last time, Adam had asked her to move away with him, and she hadn’t wanted to lose the life she’d worked so hard to create. Yet this time, he wanted to stay, and once again she was on the verge of losing everything.
“Exactly,” Jessica snapped.
“Please, Jess. I’m still me.” Panic thrummed in her brow and made her voice sound like a high-pitched squeak.
“We’ve been friends for thirteen years. I thought I knew you. Obviously, I was wrong. Who the hell are you, Laney George?”
This time, when Jessica walked off, Laney didn’t try to follow. Rain pounded against her skin like an incessant drum as Adam appeared, fully clothed and dragging her red cart behind him.
The one Simon had bought for her foraging expeditions.
Her clothes were neatly folded in his arms, and Violet walked at his heel.
“Was it bad?”
Laney rubbed her pounding brow, hardly sure what to say. How to make sense of what had just happened. Her throat ached, and she started to shake.
“I’ve never seen her like that. She and Simon were so close. All the things they say about twins being connected was true for them. But even at his funeral, it wasn’t like this. I feel like I’ve just broken something.” She choked. “She knows we dated. That I’m Nina.”
His face drained of color, and he swore under his breath.
She wrapped her arms around her waist, as if it would somehow make everything better. The rain increased.
“I’m sorry.” He searched her face, his eyes heavy with guilt. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”
“I know,” she managed to say as gooseflesh appeared on her arms. He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but then he shut it again. Instead, he carefully lifted up her clothes and passed them to her.
She mechanically dragged on her dress and shoes, the fabric clinging to her skin as the rain continued to pour. She shivered and wrapped the soaking blanket back around her shoulders.
“You’re still shaking. We need to get you home.” His soothing voice broke through the fog in her mind. “Can you drive, or do you want to come with me?”
She sucked in a breath and shook her head. “I’m okay. I can drive.”
Violet nuzzled her leg, and Laney scooped her up as they hurried back to where she’d parked the car. She blinked at the sight of Tilly’s pink hearse.
“That’s how you got here?”
“It’s a long story,” he said and then groaned. “Hell. When Jessica saw the cars, she probably thought you and Tilly were simply—”
“Yes,” she agreed, cutting him off. Not wanting to focus on what her sister-in-law had thought or seen.
“I’m sorry, Laney. If I’d known…” He trailed off, as if not sure how to make it right. That made two of them. She shuddered, and he gave her a worried look as he took the keys from her hand and unlocked the door. “I’ll load your cart into Tilly’s car and follow you home. That okay?”
She numbly nodded and waited until she heard the engine of Tilly’s car start and the lights flick on. She started her own car and slowly pulled out. The whole time, Jessica’s words kept going around and around in her head.
Who the hell are you, Laney George?
It was a good question.
For so long, she’d been seen as parentless, then a widow, and now Nina. None of them were things she’d chosen, but she’d long ago learned that the world didn’t seem to care what she wanted.
Chapter Seventeen
“Sometimes you can just feel danger on the horizon. That’s what Nina was. Always in the shadows. Always watching. Always trying to mess up what I had with Elle. Why won’t she just go away?” Blue Moon
Laney turned off the shower and reached for her phone. Still nothing from Jessica. I will not cry. She vigorously dried herself, the towel like sandpaper against her skin. Adam had followed her home the previous day and come upstairs with her, helping her out of her wet clothes and wrapping her in a thick blanket. After making her warm tea and feeding Violet, he’d kissed her on the forehead and left.
She wanted to be mad at him.
Tell him that this was his fault. If he hadn’t followed her, none of this would have happened. Except he only followed her because she’d avoided him for two days.
This is all on me.
The last twenty-four hours had been torture. As well as the phone calls and messages she’d sent to Jessica, there had also been a bunch of snowdrops and irises, along with a handwritten letter. She’d hoped her sister-in-law would realize that they were still family.
But the flowers had come back, along with the unopened letter.
Laney tightened her bathrobe and walked into her bedroom to get dressed.
She was due at Michelle’s beach house to work on the magnificent concrete wall. Part of her wanted to cancel so she could stay curled up in bed, but she wouldn’t allow herself to do that. If this had taught her anything, it was that she needed to keep her independence. The cruel twist was she’d only been worried about not trusting Adam. It hadn’t occurred to her she might lose Jessica’s support.
Everyone leaves.
She studied them, almost tempted to wear a pair. They’d certainly be more comfortable than a dress. Then she turned away.
No. There had been far too much change lately. That was what had caused this whole mess. Instead she stuffed the delicate panties and bras away and went back to her room to finish getting dressed.
She could hear Adam moving around in the apartment next door, waiting to talk to her. Indecision tore at her. She should never have let him renegotiate their deal.
But even the thought turned her stomach to ash. To the outside world, he acted like the successful author, happy to help anyone who asked, but he’d let her see the vulnerability beneath that. He’d been open to her and told her exactly how he felt.
He said he loved me.
That he’d wait.
That it wasn’t a fling.
His words were like a warm glow that unfurled in her chest, spreading through to the tangled mess of her past. She could feel the heat of the flames as they tried to burn away her concerns, but before it could fully ignite, a frigid gust of wind blew over, putting out the fire.
I’m not there yet.
She shut her eyes. Tonight. She’d speak to him tonight. Ask him for more time. Explain that she needed to make things right with Jessica before she could properly work things out with him. And hope like hell she could have everything she wanted.
…
“Hey Doctor Josh, it worked.”
Adam wiped away the sweat dripping down his brow and flicked off the treadmill, his breath clattering in his chest. The guy who’d been trying to chat up Laney at the Spring Fling stood in front of him. Cameron?
“That’s great.” He climbed down from the machine. At least his feet didn’t wobble. Then he frowned. “So, what was it that worked?”
“The advice you gave me. To tell her I liked her,” Cameron said.
“Oh, right. Shower stall.” He grabbed a towel to wipe the sweat still pouring off him. “She said yes?”
“Nah. She shot me down. There were flames and everything.” He used his fingers to mimic an explosion.
“I see.”
“You said if I told her the truth, at least I’d know,” Cameron said in a slow, clear voice as if speaking to someone slightly stupid. “And you were right. I was trying way too hard. Always running around after her. Buying her coffees, trying to make her laugh. Fixing her computer. I was so busy I didn’t even see Jules.”
“Jules.” Adam blinked.
“She works at the pool with me. Way out of my league. But, when she found out Tessa had sidelined me for real, we kind of—”
There were more hand actions, and Adam rubbed his brow. “Right. So, it all worked out, then.”
“Sure did. You’re good at this stuff.”
Highly debatable.
Cameron drifted over to a weight machine, and Adam grabbed his gear and headed for the shower. Fifteen minutes later, he was back outside.
His phone pinged with a message from Paige. He was due to move out of her apartment in three days, but when he’d explained that he wanted to stay longer, she suggested an Airbnb that her mom operated. The text was to confirm the address. Ideally, he’d prefer a more permanent solution, but he’d need to wait until Laney had sorted everything out with her sister-in-law.
All because she slept with me.
Probably not a thought he should poke at too much.
A blur of movement greeted him from the top of the stairs. Violet? She had on a blue collar, glitter on her nails, and three purple flowers around her ears.
Some of the tension in his chest lessened. If Violet was here, then so was Laney.
He pushed back the doubt that had been building up as he reached down and tickled the little dog’s ears.
“Aren’t you looking smart today,” he said as he straightened. Laney was standing by the window, wearing a dress the same color as the collar. There were dark smudges under her eyes, but she smiled at him. Hope. “You both look very beautiful.”
“Thanks.” She walked toward him, stopping just out of touching distance, but her eyes met his. Warm. Encouraging. “I see Jacob’s been having his wicked way with you.”
“I thought the guy was a puppy dog, but when it comes to working out, he’s more of a sergeant major.” His voice cracked. “You’re here.”
She let out a slow breath, and some of the worry lines around her eyes faded. Relief filled him.
“Sorry I didn’t come around earlier. I had an installation to do, and I needed some time to get my head together,” she said.
“Have you spoken to Jessica yet?”
She shook her head, a quick, tight action, and her mouth flattened. “Brett said she needs more time.”
He wanted to crush her to him. Tell her it would be okay. Kiss the hell out of her mouth. None of which would help. Probably the opposite. So he just stood there.
“Tell me what I can do.”
“Nothing. I feel like I’m in a holding pattern,” she said before her voice cracked. “What if she doesn’t forgive me, Adam?”
“She will,” he said firmly, hating the bleak look on her face. All because of me. Guilt filled him. He’d promised her he wouldn’t cause any more trouble in her life, and yet he’d inadvertently helped destroy her relationship with the person she cared about most in the world.
Nice going.
“I’ve never seen her like that. I’m not sure what hurt her most. That she caught us…or that I kept a secret from her. And Simon.”
Adam rubbed his brow. It was all such a mess.
“I’ve been in her shoes,” he said, taking a cautious step forward. “When I first found Eloise and Ryan together. I swore I’d never speak to them again.”
Some of the paleness in her face lessened. “What changed your mind?”
“They’re my family, and you don’t give up on family,” he said, and she stared at him, eyes bright with tears.
“Thank you,” she said in a faltering voice. Familiar energy danced between them, and he swallowed hard. “I didn’t mean to shut you out.”
“You don’t need to explain. I know how much Jessica means to you,” he said, wanting to plunge his hands through her hair, devour her mouth, wrap himself around her, and never let go. “Where does this leave us?”
“I don’t know…but I still want to find out. If you’re not sick of women with too much baggage who drag you into their melodramas.”
“I told you once: you don’t have to do everything alone. I’m not going anywhere.” Relief flooded through him, and he stopped fighting, instead dragging her urgently into his arms. Her mouth brushed his, hungry and urgent, letting him know that whatever he was feeling, she was right there feeling it, too. She just needed more time. He could give her that.
…
Adam shut his laptop and stood up, impatient for Laney to arrive. He’d moved into the Airbnb that morning. Considering he only had one suitcase, it hadn’t taken long, and he’d spent the rest of the day catching up on paperwork.
He crossed to the kitchen and grabbed a couple of beers to take outside, along with the packet containing Doug’s letters. The sun was bleeding pinks and reds across the wide Pacific sky. He took a mouthful of cold beer, then picked up the packet. A quick shake, and a stack of old envelopes tumbled onto the table. He carefully picked the first one up.
It was smooth, as if it had been pressed flat by an iron. He flipped up the lip and extracted a single sheet of paper.
Your roses are out today. I know y
ou have to spend time with your sister, but the house misses you. I miss you. Come back soon, my love. Life doesn’t work right without you.
Doug
Adam blinked. A love letter. Simple. Sparse. Real.
He opened another one. A pressed flower fell out, brown and dried with age, making it impossible to tell what it had once been. Yet still it had been faithfully kept.
To My Dearest Love,
The traffic in New York is dreadful. You would hate it here. One store tried to sell me a skirt for fifty dollars. Fifty. But Jemima is on the mend, and I’ll be home soon. Feed the chickens and don’t forget to ask Clarice to clean the kitchen for you. I know you’ll forget to do it yourself. And that is why we suit. You’re the other half of me.
Your loving wife, Mary
He carefully folded the letter up and slid it back into the envelope. Was that why Doug had ended up in a house full of things he didn’t need? Isolated from his friends? Because the one person who understood him had died?
Was that how Laney felt?
He took a swig of beer and contemplated another letter. He picked it up as Britney Spears rang out on his phone.
“Hey, big guy,” he said by way of greeting.
“Adam?” Ryan let out a hitched breath. He stiffened.
“I’m here. What’s going on?”
Ryan made a choking noise. “It’s El. Everything’s messed up. She’s in the hospital.”
“What?” He leaned back in the chair, blood pounding. “Tell me what happened.”
“She started bleeding. It isn’t—” Ryan broke off.
Adam was numb. Eloise. His wise-ass, straight-talking ex-wife, who never cried at anything. Apart from when she’d had a miscarriage. But that had been early in the pregnancy. This time around, she was seven and a half months pregnant.
Hell.
“Are they okay?”
“I don’t know.” Ryan’s voice broke. “The doctor tried to tell me what was going on, but I couldn’t follow. All I could see was El hooked up to all these machines. S-she’s scared. I’m not sure what to do—”
“Listen to me,” he said in a firm voice loaded with authority. Enough to shake Ryan out of going down a dark path that wouldn’t do him any good right now. “I’m getting on the next flight. Ask your doctor to email me with exactly what’s happening. Can you do that? Do it now?”