Follies and Nonsense

by Martin Hunnicutt

The maid caught Elizabeth’s eye in the mirror, “My Lady? You are not difficult – when other ladies visit Rose Briar and I talk to their maids – then I hear stories that make my hair curl,” the maid replied with a grin.

  Elizabeth returned the grin in the mirror.

  ++**++

  Descending the staircase dressed in a green print gown, Elizabeth’s only items of jewellery were a golden cross on a golden chain and her wedding ring. The footmen stood in attendance at the door of the parlour though the door was open and as she neared the doorway, she could hear her brother-in-law and father-in-law in a heated discussion.

  “I don’t want to sell the greys,” the Earl argued. “I have worked too long to get their colouring to match across all three studs.”

  “Father, we cannot afford five stables,” Lyndon argued. “We raise hunters, race horses, two stables of carriage horses and farm horses!”

  “You enjoy the hunters as much as I do,” the earl said.

  Lyndon nodded. “We have the best stables in the kingdom but no one else has five separate breeding stables!”

  “I shall not sell a single yearling!” declared the earl.

  “But we need to control our expenses! Our people are overworked and we have so much land in pasture we must buy hay.”

  When they noticed Elizabeth standing silently at the door to the room, the two men bowed and apologized before the young woman joined the conversation, “Before our guests arrive, I want both of you to calm and allow your faces to cool. Such bright red faces are not becoming on a father and son welcoming the son’s fiancé to their home.”

  The two men exchanged glances and then grinned.

  “Do you think Lady Gwendolyn believes we are in perfect harmony at all times here in Rose Briar Manor?” Lyndon asked.

  “Lady Mary knows we argue,” Lord Rutherford added. “Remember last fall when we argued for two days over who brought down that stag on the first day.”

  “But she doesn’t know that your arguments are how you discuss business and expenses. The Howells might conclude that you plan to yell at them,” Elizabeth pointed out.

  “Well, we are discussing horses,” the earl admitted.

  “And that always leads to yelling,” Lyndon agreed.

  Elizabeth tilted her head to one side. “But you only yell at each other inside the house. You never yell in the stables.”

  “Of course not,” the earl said. “That would disturb the horses.”

  “Well, I will not compare Lady Mary to a horse, but I would ask that you consider the parlour to be a stable this afternoon and keep your discourse polite and amiable.”

  Laughing, father and son agreed as Mr. Jones stepped to the door and informed the family that the Howell carriage had been seen entering the park.

  The earl glanced at the clock in the corner. “On time? I hardly believe that Lady Howell managed to arrive on time. I thought the fashion was to be at least thirty minutes late for all engagements.”

  “That affectation is for evening engagements in town Father – not for afternoon tea in the country,” Lyndon informed the earl.

  “And you wonder why I prefer the country to town,” he muttered in reply.

  Elizabeth directed her father-in-law to a sofa and she took her place beside him as she directed Lyndon to a position standing slightly behind one side of the sofa.

  “Setting the order of battle, eh Elizabeth?” asked the earl.

  “Exactly sir,” Elizabeth replied. “Lyndon will advance upon the Howells when they appear and escort them to your august presence. As your flanking force, I wait on the side-lines to join the battle at the moment I am needed.”

  “But don’t forget Elizabeth,” Lyndon quipped from behind the sofa, “every battle plan vanishes the moment you engage the enemy.”

  They heard voices in the hallway and waited as Mr. Jones appeared in the doorway to announce, “Lady Mary Howell and her daughters, Lady Gwendolyn and Lady Grace.”

  Quickly stepping to one side, Mr. Jones bowed as the woman and her two daughters entered the parlour. Lord Rutherford rose from the sofa to bow as Lady Mary curtsied.

  “Your Lordship is gracious to receive us this afternoon.”

  “Lady Howell, my son’s news last night pleased me greatly. The news that you would visit this afternoon set the entire house to work.”

  Confused for a moment, Lady Mary was by-passed as the viscount stepped forward to greet Lady Gwendolyn and lead her to the sofa.

  “You remember Lady Elizabeth, my brother’s wife,” he said as he directed Gwen to the space beside Elizabeth.

  “Of course,” Gwen replied, inclining her head once in Elizabeth’s direction. “Lady Elizabeth.”

  Now, Lyndon claimed Lady Mary’s arm and directed her toward a nearby sofa and beckoned Lady Grace to follow. The two small parties engaged in polite conversation about the room, the weather, and the roads for almost five minutes until Elizabeth made eye contact with Mr. Jones who silently exited the room to return moments later followed by three footmen bearing trays with the tea service, cake, tarts, strawberries, and biscuits.

  The trays were placed on a table beside Elizabeth where she poured tea and the others gathered to fill plates with the refreshments.

  “I notice you have fresh strawberries today,” Lady Mary said. “None of our fruits have begun to bear yet. How did you manage?”

  “We have greenhouses that provide fruits and vegetables throughout the year,” Earl Rutherford explained.

  “And these beautiful roses?” Lady Gwendolyn asked. “I remember them from last fall when we stayed for a few days.”

  “Oh mother, try the strawberry tart,” insisted Lady Grace. “They are marvellous!”

  “Grace, remember your manners!” Lady Mary insisted sharply. The younger daughter blushed and returned her plate to the tray without taking another bite.

  Lyndon and Gwendolyn had their heads together and glanced toward Grace and her mother. Looking up from her duties with the tea services, Elizabeth realized that Lady Mary watched her closely.

  Lord Rutherford returned his tea cup to the table and wiped his mouth. “I suppose we should discuss the engagement and wedding dates,” he said catching Lady Mary’s eye.

  “Yes, Lord Rutherford. I thought that we should publish the banns at our church and have the papers in town run the announcement in the middle of June.” Lyndon and Gwen exchanged glances and smiles behind Lady Mary’s head, so the earl slowly nodded his head once.

  “Father, Lady Gwendolyn and I wish for a wedding in August at the chapel in Howell House.”

  “A small wedding?” Earl Rutherford asked. “Excellent! Just family and a few friends as it should be.”

  At the earl’s endorsement for the couple’s wish for a small wedding, Lady Mary’s face grew sour. “It is my wish for a large wedding in town – all the members of the ton would attend.”

  Glancing toward Grace, Lady Mary complained, “Gwendolyn’s wedding may be my only chance to hold such a social event.”

  “Mamma!” Gwen fussed. “Grace is young yet. She’s not seventeen.”

  As the last food was consumed, Elizabeth signalled Mr. Jones who stepped from the room again to return a few minutes later with Mrs. Jones.

  When the servants stood before the family and their guests seated around the tea service, Elizabeth introduced them.

  “Lady Gwendolyn, may I introduce Mr. and Mrs. Jones, the butler and housekeeper for Rose Briar Manor. They have faithfully served his lordship for twenty years and will continue for many more years when you join the household.”

  “My Lady,” the couple replied as Mr. Jones bowed once again and Mrs. Jones curtsied to Lady Gwendolyn. Elizabeth noted that Lady Mary was not pleased to be ignored by the servants.

  Lyndon added, “They were instrumental in my education as a gentleman as well. Our children will benefit from their instruction I am certain.”

  The earl laughed. “Mrs. Jones dusted Lyndon’s backside more than s
everal times over the years and Mr. Jones rescued Lyndon on at least on two occasions I believe.”

  “It has been our pleasure to serve the Rutherford family, sir,” Mr. Jones replied.

  “Good and done,” the earl replied as he rose and bowed to the ladies. “If you will pardon me, I have horses to see to.”

  Before the earl was out of the room, Elizabeth turned to the ladies and said, “Lady Gwendolyn, I have asked Mrs. Jones to conduct you through the house this afternoon. There are three full floors for you to view.”

  Glancing first at Lyndon, Gwen smiled at her future sister-in-law.

  “Thank you, Lady Elizabeth.”

  “Shall we my lady?” Lyndon asked offering his fiancé his arm.

  “Take Grace with you,” Lady Mary ordered. “I shall remain here.”

  “This way my lady,” Mrs. Jones said leading the trio from the room, Lyndon with a sister on each arm.

  Mr. Jones directed the footmen to clear the trays and the servants departed the room through a side door, leaving the door to the hall open while the two ladies waited quietly, eyeing each other closely.

  “You cannot doubt the reason I remained behind Lady Elizabeth,” Lady Mary said.

  As she poured herself another cup of tea, Elizabeth calmly replied. “I do not know your mind Lady Mary. Perhaps you can enlighten me.”

  “Indeed, I shall!” Lady Mary insisted. “I remained behind to discuss your future in this household.”

  “You wish to discuss my future? You take an eager interest in His Lordship’s household,” Elizabeth replied. “Why is that?”

  “My daughter will establish herself as the lady of the manor after December.” Lady Mary paused for a moment before continuing, “That will be difficult with your continued presence within these halls.”

  Elizabeth tilted her head, “I agree that Lady Gwendolyn needs time to establish herself as mistress at Rose Briar. Perhaps we can strike a bargain?”

  “Strike a bargain? What do you mean?” Lady Mary demanded.

  “We shall both agree to leave the young couple alone at Rose Briar so that they can strengthen their marriage and home.”

  Lady Mary’s face was sour for a long moment but then she relaxed. They discussed the number of servants, rooms, gardens, and barns for the next several minutes.

  “I had heard you were an intelligent woman,” Lady Mary said. “I think you will be a good sister for my daughter and her husband.”

  “Thank you, Lady Howell,” Elizabeth replied. “Viscount Lyndon has been supportive through my grief and he is a good uncle for my son.”

  “I hope that provisions for you and your child will not impoverish the Rutherford household,” Lady Mary said calmly though Elizabeth blushed with the impropriety of such a statement.

  Recovering quickly, Elizabeth frowned and caught Lady Mary with a steely stare, “My son’s estate is not entangled with the Rutherford estate in any manner.”

  “Indeed? And since you brought no dowry to your marriage how is it possible that the younger son’s estate does not take away from the elder son’s inheritance.”

  Feeling her courage rise at Lady Mary’s unkind words, Elizabeth replied, “My husband inherited an estate from his mother’s brother. Matthew was the child of my father-in-law’s second wife – Lady Anne Hamilton.”

  “So, you and your son have an independent income and will not drain the earl’s funds?”

  “My son’s future is secure, Lady Mary and I shall leave Rose Briar before Lady Gwendolyn establishes residence,” Elizabeth assured the older woman.

  Lady Mary asked, “But why have you and your son remained here with your father-in-law rather than moved to his inherited estate?”

  “I remained here because the earl and I assuaged our mutual grief and His Lordship wanted to be near his grandson,” Elizabeth answered. “I understand your concern that Lady Gwendolyn should have the opportunity to grow into her role as a future mistress of Rose Briar Manor.”

  “My only concern is for my daughter’s happiness here at Rose Briar.”

  “Lady Mary, it is my sincere wish to build sisterly affection with Lady Gwendolyn – our children will be cousins,” Elizabeth replied.

  From the hall they heard the voices of the happy couple returning.

  “Lady Elizabeth, we met your charming little boy upstairs in the nursery!” Gwendolyn said as she rushed back into the room. “And the rooms are so full of light at this time of day!”

  “Thank you, Mrs. Jones,” Elizabeth said to dismiss the housekeeper.

  Lyndon turned to his fiancé and asked, “Why don’t we all take a turn in the rose garden?”

  ++**++

  Chapter 2.

  Mr. Darcy’s Family

  In a closed carriage passing along the crowded streets of London, an officer in the king’s service and his tall, dark haired cousin exchanged comments.

  “I could have used a brandy before we dashed off, Darcy,” Colonel Fitzwilliam complained sourly. “I have suffered greatly today – my mother required me to attend her while she received visitors this morning.”

  From the other side of the carriage, Fitzwilliam Darcy’s face reflected his surprise at his cousin’s revelation.

  “Why did my aunt need you in her salon this morning?”

  “Countess Fitzwilliam wanted me to renew acquaintance with three eligible ladies when their mothers brought them to call.” Darcy snickered until Colonel Fitzwilliam added, “And Her Ladyship plans to display another three ladies to us both tonight at supper. Mother’s favourite will be seated between us.”

  “Let me guess,” Darcy asked, “the lady with the largest fortune will be on your left and the lady with the best connections will be on my right?”

  Nodding his head, Darcy’s favourite cousin sighed. “Mother wants me to marry a rich heiress and she wants you to marry connections.”

  “I had hoped your mother would stop playing the matchmaker.”

  “Not as long as she has breath and there are members of the family who are not married!” the colonel replied quickly. “She and Aunt Catherine had a set-to about your prospects recently.”

  “I am a fortunate man to have two aunts concerned about my marital prospects,” Darcy mused. “But why has your mother decided to parade the eligible ladies now?”

  “She is determined to have grandchildren,” Edward replied. “Or rather she is determined to have a grandson to continue the Fitzwilliam name.”

  Darcy nodded – he felt similar pressure to marry and start his family as well to pass along the inheritance of Pemberley, the Darcy fortune, and the Darcy name.

  “Georgiana reported that your sister-in-law has given birth to her third daughter.”

  “The earl has only granddaughters,” the colonel said, “and he is concerned that my brother will have no sons. If the viscount and I die without male heirs, so dies the venerable Fitzwilliam name.”

  “You are both young yet,” Darcy noted. “You are just now thirty years.”

  “I am a soldier by profession and can die in battle, so my father has offered a sustainable bribe if I resign my commission, take a bride and give him a grandson,” Colonel Fitzwilliam explained. “I receive a substantial estate from mother’s dowry upon my marriage and a second estate with the birth of a son.”

  “What if your brother and his wife produce a son before you do?”

  Colonel Fitzwilliam snorted. “I have a head start in the race; Lady Margaret has expressed the desire to take a holiday from confinements.”

  “Three confinements in four years would take a toll on any woman.”

  Edward sighed, “I understand the family obligation to continue the line and if I find a suitable young woman who can stand a soldier for a husband, I will start my family.”

  Nodding Darcy agreed. “I need to marry as well. Georgiana and I are the last of our family – we have no cousins in the Darcy line and not one of my extended family is worthwhile knowing.”

  Fitzwi
lliam rolled his eyes, “Are there no ladies interested in becoming Mrs. Darcy? Do your features repel them? Do your odours keep them away?”

  Now mimicking his cousin’s sour expression from earlier, Darcy replied, “You know my concern; once I wed and bed an heiress, what if I discover her only true accomplishment is shopping for new gowns and knickknacks for our home? After we have our ‘heir and a spare’ to use the vulgar expression, what are we to speak of then for the next forty years?”

  Darcy looked out the window and said, “I will not do as my father and sire bastards around the kingdom.”

  Fitzwilliam nodded and then said aloud when he realized his cousin would not turn back his way, “I understand old man. Uncle George left you in an untenable position with two of his mistresses to settle.”

  “In his will, Father settled houses and incomes on these two women and they each had a child – one son to educate into a profession and the other a girl to dower for a respectable marriage. My father spent almost twenty thousand pounds making his mistresses independent.”

  The carriage pulled to a stop before Darcy’s club and the two men descended to the street. Darcy turned to the footman, “Put the team in the stable here and get your supper at the pub across the street. When the clock chimes five, bring the coach back around. We will return to the house and then venture to the Fitzwilliam home for dinner tonight.”

  “It’ll be no problem sir,” the footman said as Darcy handed over coins for his servants’ dinner at the pub.

  Colonel Fitzwilliam turned with Darcy to the entrance of the club. “Have you been practicing your fencing every week as Aunt Catherine commands?”

  “Do not mention Lady Catherine, cousin. Shall I tell you of her latest problems?”

  “No,” replied Colonel Fitzwilliam. “I am fortunate that I only have to deal with her once a year at Easter.”

  “While I deal with her throughout the year,” Darcy complained. “I shall apply to the Earl for relief and appointment of a guardian after this year. She is not…”

  “How is Georgiana?” Fitzwilliam said to change the conversation. “Does she enjoy the ocean views at Brighton?”