DANCE OR DIE: Two Guys, One Girl. No Voice. No Choice.

by A. E. Murphy

  “Somebody very powerful had your back.”

  I think back to the red crystal. Was this what it was for? Did she know this was going to happen? Did she protect me? The crystal was red, the light was red. Coincidence?

  “Let’s get you home.”

  “What about the panty box.”

  “The agent will get it during cleanup.”

  “What about my uncle?”

  She rubs my trembling arms and looks me in the eyes. “He won’t be alive for much longer if she has anything to do with it.”

  “I didn’t kill her?”

  She shakes her head. “No. She’s a queen, it’ll take a lot more than a pretty red light to put that one into the nether where she belongs.”

  The nether?

  I feel my body slump forward and Mackenzie catches me as I ask, “Whasssgingon?”

  “Rest, you’ll feel better tomorrow.”

  Huh?

  “It’s better this way, trust me.”

  I stretch and roll over onto Presley’s back, wrapping my arm around his chest. My head is pounding and foggy. I don’t feel great.

  I slowly peel my bare flesh from his and sit up.

  Presley, feeling me move, turns and blinks, looking as though he can’t believe the sight of me.

  “When did you get back?” he asks breathlessly, rubbing his eyes as I turn, swinging my legs over the side of the bed.

  “Get back?” I whisper, trying to recall the night before. “Did I go somewhere?”

  “Well… yeah, you left us a note and three dead fucking roses and took some of your shit. You don’t remember?”

  I rub my temples and he comes up behind me and rubs my shoulders and neck.

  “Did you get drunk or something?”

  My mouth does taste like whiskey. “It’s probable. I vaguely remember calling that journalist.” I vaguely remember her FBI agent guy opening the box with gloves on and revealing the tiny rolls of panties, dating back to when I was eight and thought of the idea. I was a smart kid. I’d wipe the mess clean from between my thighs, roll up the panties into a little tube shape and hide them beneath the bottom layer of the jewelry box. They all had not just my uncle’s DNA, but others’ too. My cousin, one of his friends, my uncle’s acquaintances. I was nothing but a toy while growing up. All their DNA in different panties as well as mine and some even contained traces of my blood.

  Now that it’s gone, it feels like such a weight lifted. Like I’ve been dragging an anchor around my entire life.

  “My head really hurts,” I mumble and he starts massaging my scalp.

  When his phone rings, he stops for a second to answer it. “She’s back. Yeah… I don’t know. You coming?”

  Carter replies that he’s on his way and I lift Presley’s hands back to my head. He chuckles and continues rubbing, opening his thighs so I’m situated between them.

  “You smell smoky,” he comments, sniffing my hair. “Did you go to a bar?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  “Are you still leaving?”

  I shake my throbbing head. “I don’t want to leave, but I don’t want to stay if it’s going to cause problems between you and Carter.”

  He doesn’t acknowledge anything I said. “Stanley came looking for you last night. He’s worried about you.”

  “I know he is, but I can’t just forget.”

  “I understand that.” His hands move from my head, to my neck, to my shoulders, and then my bare breasts. “But I also think everybody deserves a second chance.”

  “After what he did?”

  “He was a deadbeat dad,” he admits, turning my head to look at him. “But he came back.”

  “If your dad comes back after what he did, would you forgive him?”

  He shrugs his shoulders. “If he comes back clean and willing to make changes, then yeah. He’s my dad. I’m always gonna love him even when I shouldn’t.”

  I press my forehead to his cheek and let him take my weight. We stay like this until Carter arrives.

  “I don’t know what to do,” I whisper before he lets Carter in.

  “You can stay with me,” Presley tells me, hooking me around the neck. “You can always stay with me. I’ll never let you down.”

  “I can’t choose.”

  He nods with a gentle smile and disappears for a moment. I pull one of his black shirts over my head. It has bold yellow writing on the front that reads:

  “If you don’t say it with your lips, will I see it in your eyes?”

  It’s one of my favorites of his. I might keep it. It buries me, but then, his and Carter’s clothes do. I’m small compared to them. Though not short, just petite. I’m at an average height.

  Carter bounds into the bedroom and his body hits mine so hard we both tumble onto the bed.

  I laugh gently beneath him as he wriggles to a position of comfort.

  “You smell so good.”

  “I know,” he replies arrogantly and I wonder if he’s starting to pick up Presley’s traits. “You smell smoky… like fire or something.”

  “Presley said that very thing.” I push him to the side and kiss him on the lips. “I’m going to shower since you’re both judging me.”

  He slaps my ass when I stand. “So, you’re staying?”

  “Until I figure out my next move, if that’s okay?”

  He doesn’t seem jealous or upset. “Just as long as you’re not leaving.”

  “Though if this becomes a more permanent thing,” Presley says from the doorway with a smirk on his gorgeous lips, “we’re going to need a bigger place, with a bigger bed.”

  “We can figure that out when we go to college together,” Carter adds as my head whips back and forth between them.

  “Good plan, three people paying the bills is way better than one.”

  “That’s what I was thinking. And if we go to NOC, we can travel back and forth as often as we need.”

  “It is a great college and didn’t you say your dream was to live in New Orleans?” Presley asks me.

  I blink slowly, trying to register what they’re telling me here. “Yeah… it is.”

  “Then New Orleans College it is. There’s no way we’re not getting into their dance courses. We’re already local sensations.”

  I wouldn’t say that, but we’re not bad; that’s for sure.

  “Agreed. We are fucking amazing,” Carter adds, climbing from the bed and tucking me into his body, my back against his chest.

  “What exactly are you both saying?” I question breathlessly, feeling my heart expand.

  “We’re good as we are,” Presley replies, leaning forward and touching his lips to mine. “We’ve been talking about it a lot lately.”

  “At first we were mad that you wouldn’t choose, and then—”

  “We realized who cares? I don’t mind sharing.”

  “Me neither.”

  “So… you’re like both going to be my boyfriend?”

  “Yep.” Presley yanks me from Carter and cups my rear with his hands.

  Carter moves Presley’s hands and rubs his hips against my rear. “If that’s okay with you?”

  I’m dreaming. I must have hit my head last night and now I’m dead and this is all a fucking dream. “What will people think?”

  “Do you care?”

  I shake my head when I realize that I don’t care. I’m just so fucking happy that I don’t have to choose. “I think… if you’re serious… I’m the luckiest girl in the entire world. I never thought I’d say that.”

  “I agree,” Presley whispers against my lips. “I am something special.”

  Laughing, I slap his chest and squeeze out from between them both. “I need to shower.”

  They both stand side by side, bulges in their pants and excitement and love in their eyes.

  I can’t remember why I ever wanted to leave them to begin with.

  “I thought you said these roses died,” I shout at Presley, pulling the three bound flowers from
the trash can by the bathroom door.

  “They did, they were brown and crispy,” he calls back as he approaches, and then he peeks over my shoulder at them when he reaches me. “What the fuck?”

  “They were definitely dead, I saw them,” Carter answers, scratching his head as I place them in a mug in the middle of the table where the sun is shining.

  “Well, they’re perfectly fine now,” I utter touching my personal color with my fingertips. My face stretches with a smile and the ring of thorns around the bottom looks sharper than ever. I touch one, letting it prick my skin and draw a tiny dot of blood to the surface.

  Forgiveness… the word… it swims around in my brain but I block it out and finally shower, sucking my bloody finger as I go.

  “Okay… and UP!” Presley shouts and Carter raises me by my hips into the air.

  My arms go out, I inhale a lungful of clear air and press my feet together.

  “That’s it, that’s it!” Presley yells, sounding as excited as I feel. “That’s not it… that’s not it!”

  He catches me when I scream and tumble over Carter’s head who rights himself before he falls too.

  “Shit,” Carter curses, rolling his toes on the ground. “I’m sorry, I got arrogant and fucked up.”

  I kiss his cheek and thank Presley for the save. Then I retake my place. “Let’s go again.”

  Carter crouches slightly and readies himself. I go flying at him and he lifts me again.

  “Fucking A, that is so cool!” Alice declares. “Do me! Do me!” Then she wags her brows, walks two fingers up Presley’s chest, changes her tone to one of seduction, and says, “Do me.”

  I burst into a fit of laughter and drop onto Carter who stumbles but manages to keep us both up.

  “Alice, hands off my goods.” I grab Presley’s ass and pull him tight to my body.

  “That’s no fair though. You’re just greedy. I mean… they share with their best friend. Why can’t you, my best friend, share with me?”

  “Because we only have eyes—”

  “And boners—”

  “For this fine piece of ass.” Carter lifts me with his arms under my breasts and spins me once.

  When Alice smiles, I notice something missing… something metal…

  “OH MY GOD. YOUR BRACES!”

  “Gone like your deadbeat mother,” she jokes, patting my head. “Are you intimidated now that I’m prettier than you?”

  “You were always prettier than me,” I say to my friend and slap my hand over Presley’s mouth to get him to shut up before he says anything. Not that it would upset her. Alice is the banter queen. The nastier it is, the harder she laughs.

  “Asher and Melvin are fucking again,” she informs us. “So now I don’t have an in-between friend, which means I’m about to become needy.”

  “Always happy to have you around,” I say with a grin and back up. “But you need to move. We’ve got the Christmas dance in less than a week and you’re in our way.”

  “Fine… fine.” She skulks to the side and pulls out her camera. “But I’m filming every dive you take.”

  “Bitch.”

  “Spit roast.”

  I’d like to deny it and say we haven’t fucked like I’m the rotating piggy in the middle… but that would be a lie. I totally swallowed Presley’s cock while Carter gripped my hips and fucked me from behind.

  It was intense. They just kind of stayed mostly still while I rocked back and forth, though when they were sure they weren’t going to hurt me, they got a bit more animated and I orgasmed for days. Though I did sink my teeth into Presley’s cock a little during orgasm but he didn’t seem to mind it so much. We did it crab style too but that was weird as fuck. It helps to be flexible when you have two penises to pleasure.

  “I love you,” Carter mouths at me when he almost drops me again a third time. I touch my nose to his and get back into position.

  This time he nails it and we all scream and cheer like the big kids we are.

  Carter put some tinsel around our mug of roses. It’s our tree because this trailer is far too small for an actual tree.

  I now officially adore December. It’s my first Christmas with people I love so the season really does make my feel jolly. Though there’s this lingering niggle where Stanley and Lane are concerned.

  Presley will spend Christmas with his sister and his mother who still can’t leave the hospital, which means I’m supposed to be going to Carter’s so I’m not alone. I spent Thanksgiving with their family too. It was really nice and the food was great but… that fucking niggle in my chest and head. I have missed Stanley, I have missed Lane, I have certainly missed Paisley poking me in the eyes to wake me up in the mornings. It’s the first place I have ever felt at home, and though I know I’ll probably never live there again, part of me wants to see them. But I get so angry when I do.

  It’s even harder now, as our group dances, with Stanley and Lane in the front row cheering me on like they didn’t break my fucking heart. I try not to focus on them as we do our routine, which is a great routine in my opinion, that started with Carter, Michael, and Presley all in slutty Santa costumes dancing the Jingle Bell Rock dance from Mean Girls. The crowd was in hysterics.

  Penny and I join them, as though showing them how to really dance, the music skips to our track, but then skips right back to Jingle Bell Rock when they started again.

  It is amazing we are all having such a good time.

  The boys return to their rivalry the moment it is over now that there’s no truce to uphold for the dance’s sake, but I like it this way. It’s fun having a little bit of drama and competition.

  Stanley looks every part the proud father, though he hasn’t yet earned that title. Lane looks every bit the proud mother, but again, she definitely hasn’t earned that title. Paisley danced along with us without leaving the bleachers, having seen the routine a couple of times when Presley brought her to the barn where all of us practiced each night. I’ve been teaching her some things and I think she’s a natural already, just like her big brother.

  Mr. Jefferson starts the ending announcements after walking to the middle of the court where we just finished dancing moments ago. “Give it up for Dance Elite SP, and Lame and Lamer—wait… that’s not their na—sorry, guys, I’m reading from a script and somebody has tampered with it.”

  Carter and Presley laugh so hard they have to turn around. They bump knuckles and Michael heads our way with his hands ready to throttle them both.

  I step in front of them, blocking his path and shake my head with a brow raised. “Nuh-uh. Walk away.”

  The boys stand at my back like my very own squad. I can feel their amusement and their eagerness to kick ass if they need to.

  “Walk away, Lamer,” Presley says around a shit-eating grin.

  “Fuck you,” Michael snarls and goes back to his team as Mr. Jefferson continues to talk about the past year and the new year and blah blah.

  Meanwhile Carter takes my weight when I lean back against him and wave at Alice in the crowd who then decides to yell, “WOO! THAT’S MY HO! OO, OO, OO!”

  Her mom clips her around the head.

  I laugh and Carter kisses my cheek sending happy tingles through my body.

  Jefferson finishes and the hall starts to clear out. At last.

  Stanley makes his way over with a gift bag in his hand. Lane tentatively follows and Presley scoops up his sister and starts tickling her sides.

  “You’re all sweaty,” Paisley cries, clearly disgusted.

  I laugh but my smile fades when Stanley stops in front of me, eyes glowing with pride.

  “You were amazing,” he compliments while smiling softly. “Better than I was as a teen.”

  “Definitely,” Jefferson calls, having heard him. “The three of them will be the reason we get another ridiculously large trophy in our cabinets.”

  “Definitely.” They share an excited grin.

  “I’m being summoned.” He shakes Stanley�
��s hand, pats Carter on the shoulder, and then walks away to speak to other parents.

  Stanley hands me the gift bag but Carter takes it on my behalf when I don’t even raise a finger to take it. I don’t want anything from him, at the same time, I really want to see what’s inside.

  “Can we go?” I ask him when Stanley opens his mouth to talk.

  “Scandal,” Stanley pleads, “just ten minutes. That’s all I want.”

  Carter gives me a little shove in his direction and I just know he’s not going to let me leave until I’ve spoken to him.

  “Two minutes,” I grumble. “We’re going to a party.”

  “Two minutes,” he agrees and follows me out of the side exit that leads directly to the school yard.

  We stop far away from the doors and the prying ears of people wanting to eavesdrop. People in this school love to eavesdrop.

  I find it hard to look at him. He’s somehow become symbolic, representing my abandonment issues, my painful past, and all of the things bad in between.

  “You were amazing. You are going to go further than I ever did.” He guides me to the common benches, where students sit around a statue during break. I sit on one end of the bench to rest my tired legs and he sits in the other.

  “You quit for the military.”

  “There was no money in dance back then, not like there is today. I needed something that got me a pension.”

  I nod and chew on my lip. An awkward silence lapses, so I hurry the conversation along and ask him what I really want to know. “When did you have an affair with Mom?”

  He blows out a breath and gazes ahead with a sad look in his eyes. “I didn’t have an affair with your mom.”

  “One-night stand?”

  “No… she… umm…” His cheeks go red. “I paid her. She needed money for drugs, I needed…” He clears his throat and looks away.

  I guess I appreciate his honesty, though it doesn’t surprise me that my deadbeat mother would sell herself for drugs.

  “You had Lane.”

  “Do you remember how I told you that I wasn’t a good person whenever I got back from deployment?”

  I nod.