Hate So Good: A High School Bully Romance (The Hate Series Book 2)

by Nina Lincoln

  He spins away and runs his hands through his hair, taking a deep breath before saying softly, “What more do you want?”

  “I want you to fight for me,” I say fiercely before walking away.

  I don’t look back. I can’t bear to see him, especially while my heart is beating out of my chest uncomfortably with love for him, and he’s marked by another.

  *****

  Melissa spends the evening with me, but she’s moody and grim, and when I try to pry it out of her, she just snarls at me and stomps away. Bewildered, I stare after her until my phone rings with a call from Teddy.

  “Hey, Teddy!” I answer with a troubled smile.

  “Hey Finn, how are you?”

  “I’m okay, nothing new to report.”

  “That’s not what I heard,” he says.

  “Oh?”

  “Uh, yeah, a party Finn? Don’t you think that’s dangerous?”

  “Don’t worry. Melissa stood over me like a creeper the whole time.”

  He chuckles but then says, “Why?”

  “Because I need to know, Teddy, and I hoped Tiffany might show.”

  “Finn, Tiffany’s a crack whore. You can’t trust anything that comes out of her mouth.”

  Blinking, I lean back in surprise. Teddy’s usually so calm it’s weird to hear him speak of her so harshly.

  “Even so, she found me at the restaurant for a reason, and that reason is the psycho who won’t let up. Besides, she’s in danger too,” I say softly.

  Teddy’s pretty jade eyes soften, “I know Finn. I heard she went home with Colt. You okay with that?”

  Smiling tremulously, I hide my displeasure, annoyed by Teddy for the first time since I met him all those months ago. It’s like he’s trying to get under my skin tonight.

  Although, to be fair, he doesn’t know about our scheme to get to Tiffany. From his perspective, it looks like Colt moved on disgustingly quickly.

  “It is what it is,” I say grimly, “listen, I’ve got to go, talk later, okay?”

  “Okay, Finn, be safe.”

  Closing my phone, I find Melissa on the back porch smoking a cigarette. “Since when do you smoke?” I ask with surprise, stepping out beside her.

  She grunts, turning to me with a weird expression, and when she says nothing, I finally break. “What’s going on?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Melissa…” I say with exasperation.

  She flicks the cigarette into the grass and stomps past me into the house. “I gotta go.”

  “Okay, are you sure there’s nothing wrong?”

  Stopping abruptly at the door, she says to the wood. “Maybe it was a bad idea to involve the others.”

  “With our plan?”

  “Yes.”

  “Okay, why?”

  “Because nothing is ever as it seems, Finn. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “What do you mean?” I whisper.

  “I mean, maybe this is all a game too? You know. Maybe…” she sighs and shakes her head. “Never mind, I gotta go.”

  With that, she goes, and I’m left staring after her bewildered and hurting. Does she think the stalking shit is part of the guy’s game?

  *****

  After brooding the better part of the weekend, I leave the house, which I know is foolish, but I’m fucking going crazy.

  The only other place I can think of that’s safe to go is the bookstore Colt’s mom owns. Yes, this may be a pathetic attempt to see him, but it’s also sheer desperation, I can’t stay in the house for a moment longer.

  Pulling up to the shop, I enter the store cautiously and round a corner, immediately easing. Celia’s efforts to make the bookstore charming soothes something in my soul.

  Dad never approved of color or happiness. Everything had to be in order, and he raged if it wasn’t. With its mismatched furniture and haphazard shelving, this store is the antithesis and makes me happy as a result.

  Sitting down on a long couch next to a funky table, I pull a book about horticulture in my lap and mindlessly turn the pages. Now that I’m here, I’m afraid to know if Colt is, because if he’s not, then where is he? And with whom?

  Thankfully, I’m left alone, and I presume whoever is on duty is somewhere in the back. After a while, I doze, which may sound strange, but I feel safe here where I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop at home.

  When the door chimes announcing the arrival of a customer, I jerk awake, glancing around sheepishly.

  “What are you doing here?” I recognize Colt’s deep voice, the tone icy as he greets whoever just came through the door.

  “Where’s Trent?” a woman asks, just as coldly.

  “How the fuck should I know?”

  “Don’t speak to me that way, you little shit. I’m tired of your attitude. Where have you been?”

  “Around, look, what do you want?” he asks bitterly.

  “I’d like to speak to my husband. I know he’s here. Send him out.”

  “Look,” Colt says warily, “he’s not here.”

  “Listen,” she says, her tone low, “I know it was you that beat up Buck. You better watch yourself. You’re not fucking special, no matter the circumstances. Stay away from him, or I’m going to make your life miserable.”

  “You already are,” he sneers.

  Easing from the couch, I peek around the corner as surreptitiously as possible. An icy blonde stands before Colt, staring at him with derision. She’s dressed impeccably from head to toe in designer clothes - her feet encased in the highest heels I’ve ever seen on a woman. Her posture is ramrod straight, and even her hair is tucked back in a bun obediently.

  I recognize her icy expression from the pictures I revealed at prom, although she looks a little older and icier. This is Colt’s stepmom or whatever.

  “I think you need a reminder of who’s in charge here,” she says.

  “Fuck you and him too. Maybe he shouldn’t try raping girls then,” Colt sneers.

  She gasps, her head rearing back. “You little shit. Don’t forget who holds all the cards here. I can destroy your mother like this,” she says, snapping her fingers.

  Silence reigns after her pronouncement. I can’t see Colt’s face, but I presume he’s gracing her with his coldest demeanor, the one that always freezes me out. Although this bitch gives him a run for his money.

  Jesus. What a supremely fucked up family...families. Ugh.

  Why is she here? And why would she show up at her husband’s second wife’s place of business all nonchalant? This is some weird shit.

  “Just remember what I said. Don’t fucking speak, don’t try to intervene, do as your told, and stay the fuck away from my son. Trash like you should be taken out.”

  Wincing at the familiar slur, spoken straight from her wicked son’s mouth, I watch open-mouthed as she stalks out, her back ramrod straight, ignoring me as she passes.

  Once the door flips open and closes with a whoosh, I shrink away, hoping Colt doesn’t see me. I suspect this isn’t something he would want to share.

  An ache fills my chest for her, even though she’s a bitch, and for Colt and his mom - this is a cluster of epic proportions, and there is no right way out for any of them.

  Slinking back to my bag, I freeze when Colt says, “You can come out now.”

  With a sheepish look, I peer around the corner and step into his sight. He’s waiting for me with a grim expression, but I can tell he doesn’t really see me, just the nasty woman who threatened him and left on a tide of cold air.

  “So that was rich bitch?” I whisper.

  His eyes snap to mine, growing dark before his mouth quirks up in a smirk, “In the flesh. Charming, eh?”

  “Most definitely,” I say dryly.

  He turns to the counter, straightening the tchotchkes displayed there, and I recognize the avoidance tactic. Colt’s never been good about sharing his emotions. I guess in this case, I don’t blame him.

  “What did she mean? About you do
ing as you're told?” I ask tentatively.

  His entire body stiffens like a live wire, his head falling back to the ceiling before he laughs bitterly and says, “If I don’t cause any trouble, she’ll allow my dad to keep seeing Mom.”

  “Allow?”

  “She holds the purse strings, owns the company. Dad’s just the puppet.”

  “Wow, that’s fucked up. Why doesn't she care?”

  Shrugging, he says, “I don’t think there’s any love lost between them. Maybe this gives her power, although she doesn’t need it with all the money. Dad sure isn’t leaving as long as she’s willing to give him access.”

  “I’m sorry,” I murmur.

  Turning back to me, he smiles, and my breath hitches at the way his grey eyes light up the room, and overwhelmed, I turn away. I guess it’s my turn to avoid deep feelings. Maybe we’re both equally fucked in the head.

  “Why are you here?” he asks softly.

  Shrugging, I turn back to him and mutter, “I was going crazy at the house and here…”

  “Here?” he asks, taking a single step toward me.

  “I feel safe here.”

  “Do you?”

  “Yes,” I say, raising my face to his.

  Reaching up, he runs the tip of his finger down my cheek, and I shiver under his touch, my veins liquefying as his eyes smolder with fire, but just as quickly as it came, he banks it and steps away.

  To hide my discomfort and disappointment, I ask, “How did you know I was here?”

  “I saw you sleeping,” he says with a devilish smirk.

  “Oh.” Shrugging my shoulders helplessly, I laugh uncomfortably to cover the heat suffusing my cheeks.

  “Anyway, you can stay. But I have to go.”

  “Oh, okay,” I say awkwardly, turning away from him and the slicing pain in my chest.

  I want to run to him and hold him tight, but I’m afraid that unlike with Tiffany, his arms would be loose and lackluster around me. Have I lost him already?

  “Finn,” he says hesitantly.

  “Yes,” I say, glancing back.

  He stares at me intently before shaking his head, “Nothing.”

  With that, he walks away, taking my bruised heart with him.

  *****

  The following week, Melissa’s MIA, Colt’s more distant than ever, and I’m avoiding Teddy. To say I’m lonely would be an understatement, and to add insult to injury, Colt’s seemingly dating some girl, a junior maybe.

  Because I can’t stand the sight and I’m a fucking moron, I hide away in the library, nursing my wounds. Dully, I spend the time reading through my work and daydreaming about things better left in the dark.

  It’s been a few weeks since the gym incident, so I’m not surprised, but I am filled with dread when I get a new text from my fan.

  Well, hello, dear Finn. I’m disappointed our meeting got cut short, but don’t worry, I’ve been making plans for a reunion.

  Staring at the phone with a sigh, I finally give in and type out a response.

  Finn: What do you want with me?

  For us to be together

  Finn: Why?

  Because you’re special, Finn, don’t you know?

  Finn: If that’s the case, why won’t you tell me who you are?

  Because dear Finn, what's the fun in that? No, I want it to be a surprise! Isn’t that delicious?

  Finn: You’re not very nice for someone who claims to like me

  Now don’t be petulant. This is all part of the fun. Before we get too off-topic, you should know, I punish those who betray me

  You should remember that before you try seeking out my followers.

  It won’t end well for them.

  Setting down the phone with trembling fingers, I glance around, but I’m alone. Still, I can’t shake the feeling of being watched, which follows me everywhere I go. This guy is fucking insane, and there’s no way out of this, at least not without someone getting hurt.

  Tell me you understand Finn, or this won’t go well for you. Stop trying to ruin my surprise.

  Finn: I understand

  Closing out the phone, I turn away, my stomach clenched with anger. This fucker is never going to give in, and every person I involve makes them vulnerable. I’m on my own.

  Chapter Ten

  March turns into April with barely a blink of the eye, but I’m too caught up in a fog of depression that weighs me down to notice. Avoiding everyone, afraid to put them in harm's way, I stick to myself and wallow in my misery, and as the days grow longer, my anxiety grows with it, the knowledge that my time is running out, weighing heavily on me.

  I’m exhausted because I can’t sleep for fear my fan will appear the minute I close my eyes. I’m jumpy and damned if I’m not as paranoid as Tiffany was the last time I saw her. I guess now I know why she was acting so fucking weird. This jerk, whoever he is, burrows under your skin and lives like a fucking foreign invader waiting for the time to erupt.

  Last night, as I laid awake staring at the ceiling, I came to the bitter realization my stalker is no different than my dad. We existed in a perpetual state of fear, always walking on eggshells waiting for the other shoe to drop around him. He cycled so quickly between his emotions that we were always on edge and exhausted. I thought I was free of that when my mom died, and he went to prison, but apparently, there is no escaping it.

  In some fucked up way, I wonder if this isn't my penance. Maybe convincing myself, Mom was saying goodbye is a fucking lie. Perhaps she was begging me to do something, and instead, I sat there in petrified horror, and now it’s my fucking turn because I was a coward then.

  Who knows?

  Melissa’s been avoiding me, although she checks in periodically. I don’t know what I did, if anything, to piss her off, but grimly I acknowledge it’s for the best right now anyway. Anyone affiliated with me runs the risk of my fan’s displeasure.

  I’ve even avoided Teddy because his behavior has been borderline mean, and I’m not in the right headspace to address it.

  Colt no longer acknowledges my existence, although he remains at South walking through the halls with a new girl under his arm every day or hanging out with his friends. Sometimes I catch sight of him, with his sly smirk and fierce eyes, and it’s so painful I have to turn away, but I’m learning to live without him if you can call this living.

  It’s a Friday, and this the last period of the day is monotonous, so I stare out the window absently instead. The trees just beyond have bloomed, their branches filled with bright green leaves, vivid against the blue sky. I haven’t been anywhere but home and school for weeks, and looking at the life around me makes my soul feel shriveled and worn in my chest.

  When the bell rings, I creep around the corner to the door and my car, only to bump into a hard chest and bounce back, as strong arms grab me before I fall, only to let me go just as quickly.

  My heart thumps painfully as I stare at Colt’s chest, avoiding his sure to be vacant stare, while I admire the way the thin material of his tee stretches tantalizingly over his muscles.

  Before either of us can react, some chick flies up and wraps her arms around him eagerly, and I retreat, finding the nearest bathroom to which I can duck inside.

  I’m tired of this shit. Maybe I should just transfer out - there’s always Academy. Fuck.

  When I emerge, the halls are empty, and I trudge to my car tiredly, only to stop up short at Hayden leaning against it, looking me over with a grimace. Annoyed, I straighten my spine and open my mouth to growl at him, but he beats me to it.

  “You look like shit, Finn.”

  “Gee, thanks,” I say icily.

  “This won’t do, c’mon.”

  “Huh?”

  “You gonna wallow in your shit or do something about it?”

  “Wallow?” I say tentatively.

  He snorts and grabs my arm, and I give a halfhearted protest, which he ignores before sliding into his car when he opens the door. Once he’s in the passenger
seat, he starts his muscle car up and blazes from the lot with a squeal of tires.

  “Where are we going?” I ask warily.

  “Fight Club,” he says wickedly.

  “Why?”

  “Because you need to get your head out of your ass, and so does Colt. I’m tired of this shit. Was he a dick? Sure, but whatever.”

  “Hayden, you were a dick too,” I mutter.

  “Yeah,” he laughs, “well, whatever. It was clear as soon as Colt laid eyes on you that you were it for him. He just fought it because he’s stupid.”

  “How so?”

  “Because he wouldn’t let the rest of us play the game, sweet. Nate tried anyway but look what that got him? Colt wanted you all along but pretended he didn’t.”

  “It’s still reprehensible.”

  “Finn, you look like shit. He’s acting like shit. What’s the better choice? To be miserable or to forgive?”

  “He’s moved on, that girl-“

  “He doesn’t give a shit about that chick. It’s all an act,” he chuffs.

  “Hmm,” I respond, ignoring the pulse of hope in my heart.

  *****

  Hayden takes me for food before Fight Club, and when we pull up to the warehouse, I glance warily out the window at all the cars surrounded by darkness, the only light shining from inside.

  “Alright, don’t leave my sight,” Hayden says, and I nod, following behind him.

  I’m both fearful and excited to see Colt, but can I trust Hayden?

  Immediately my eyes fly to the ring when we enter to a crescendo of shouts, and I spy two guys really going at it. Unbelievably I see that one of them is Colt, and he’s whaling on some dude, his face pulled back in a vicious snarl.

  His little bitch from school stands beside the ring, cheering him on, and my lip curls with disgust. She has no care for his safety, only the picture he forms standing in the ring.

  I’ll admit he does look insanely hot, his chest gleaming with sweat and his muscles rippling every time he moves. Helplessly, I watch one such drop slide down his beautiful pecs and soak into the band of his shorts.

  He’s a work of art, to be sure, but can’t she see the dead space behind his eyes? He’s broken, and she’s eating it up like candy. He’s not even here but inside his head somewhere.