My Valentine

by Jaimie Roberts

  “You make the baby sound like a hamburger,” David jokes.

  She laughs at that, and is about to retort when another contraction comes. Grabbing David’s hand, I scream out again.

  “Push, baby,” David encourages, squeezing my hand back.

  With as much strength as I can muster, I push and I push, and I push. Once the contractions subside, I close my eyes. “I can’t do this anymore.”

  “Yes you can!” both David and Janet say together.

  I have no time to argue back as another contraction rips through me. “I want this baby out of me!” I push again, and this time I scream out channelling all my energy into getting this baby out as soon as possible.

  “That’s it!” Janet cries, smiling. “I can see the baby’s head. Look, Dad. Come see.”

  David scoots down, his eyes widening once he sees the head. Then, a big smile emerges. “The baby has hair. Lots of dark hair.”

  “Really?” I screech. I don’t have time to dwell on this as pretty soon another contraction comes.

  “Come on, you can do it. One more push, and then the baby’s head will be out. That’s always the hardest part.”

  I push again, and with each encouraging word from David and Janet, it gives me the strength to keep going.

  “That’s it!” Janet shouts.

  Tears form in David’s eyes as he looks down at his baby. “Oh my God, baby, he’s beautiful. Just like his mum.”

  “It’s a boy?” I ask.

  Janet smirks up to David. “I just sense he is,” David responds.

  Another contraction rips through me. Janet taps my knee. “One more push and he’s out. Come on, Mum. You can do it!”

  Now, she’s also calling the baby a he. What’s that about?

  I have no time to dwell as the pain forces me into action. I push, and I push, and I can feel the baby come away. Relief washes over me when it’s all over, and I hear the baby cry.

  “It’s a boy!” Janet cries, smiling from ear to ear. “A healthy baby boy. Well done, Mum.”

  I beam up at David, who’s now crying. He leans forward, kissing my forehead. “I’m so proud of you.”

  Emotions wash over me as David soothingly strokes my hair. He’s looking at me like I’m the only woman in the world right now.

  “Do you want to cut the cord, Dad?” Janet asks, offering him the scissors.

  David looks at me and I nod, encouraging him to do it. Considering he’s going to be the father, it’s only natural he should cut the cord.

  I see him snip as Janet wraps up my baby in a towel and hands him over to me all fresh. She must have wiped him down.

  As he coos and wriggles in my arms, I look down into my beautiful baby’s eyes. David was right. He is beautiful. He has a mass of black hair, a beautiful button nose, and wide brown eyes. As he opens his hand, I place my finger inside and when he grips, something monumental happens inside of me.

  It’s then I know that nothing in this world matters other than this baby.

  For the first time in my life, I’ve fallen in love.

  And I know that this feeling is real.

  “Do you have a name for him?”

  David says no at the same time as I nod my head. David frowns, looking down at me. “You thought of a name?”

  I nod. “Just now. I know the perfect name for him. I hope you feel the same way.”

  “What is it?” he asks with apprehension written all over his face.

  “James,” I answer, knowing it’ll bring a smile to his face.

  “My middle name,” he replies. “Are you sure?”

  I nod again. “Sure, I’m sure. You are his father. It’s only right he has a name that’s part of you.”

  David laughs and with it fresh tears slide down his face. He kisses me tenderly on the forehead again before saying, “I love it.” Another kiss. “And I love you. So much.”

  “I saw the letter,” I whisper, knowing this will take the smile away.

  Leaning his forehead on mine, he looks down at James before looking up into my eyes. “I already told you, I don’t care about that,” he whispers, kissing me on the lips this time.

  I look across at Janet, but she’s busy putting stuff away. I guess she’s allowing us some privacy for a moment. “Where did you go?” I ask, glancing back at David.

  He grits his teeth. “I went to speak with my father.”

  I frown. “I thought you hadn’t spoken to your father in years?”

  “I haven’t.”

  “Then what have the paternity results got to do with …” And then it hits me. “Was my mother having an affair with your father?”

  David closes his eyes with a nod. “When he ended it, she slept with me in retaliation. I knew he was having an affair, I just didn’t know it was her at the time.”

  Shit. This just goes from bad to worse. It sounds as though my mum slept with half the frickin village! I have to laugh yet again at her hypocrisy. If only she was here right now. I’d tell her exactly what I think of her.

  “Let me get him cleaned up for you,” Janet says, walking towards me and holding out her hands. I’m surprised at how reluctant I am to let James go. I think she can tell how I’m feeling. “I’ll have him back in your arms in no time,” she says, smiling.

  Yeah, she knows.

  I smile up at her before offering James. He stirs and starts fretting. Janet starts laughing. “Looks like James doesn’t want to part with Mum either.” She turns to David. “Do you have a baby bath upstairs?”

  David nods. “I’ll show you where everything is.”

  David leads the way, and I watch as the three of them disappear up the stairs. Immediately, I want James back. It scares me how much I feel for this baby even though he was only born five minutes ago.

  As I lay there for however long they’re up there, I start to think about everything that’s happened and everything that will happen in the future. It’s the beginning of May now, but in a month or so, I will be jetting off to Spain to start my revenge on Reid. The thought suddenly leaves a pang in my heart. Five minutes ago, revenge on Reid was the only thought on my mind, but now that James is here, it changes things. Already the thought of leaving him behind so I can fulfil my mission leaves me scared shitless. I know that if I turned around now and told David that I wanted to leave my revenge and emigrate with him to America, he would drop everything, and we’d be on a flight in no time. The easy option would be to have him killed and be done with it.

  But the old me knows that’s just way too easy.

  “Here he is,” Janet sings, walking towards me with a crying James in her arms. “A very healthy six pounds and twelve ounces.” She bends, offering me James back, and I immediately take him in my arms. As soon as he settles, so does his crying. Janet beams. “See. I knew you’d be a natural at this.” As David walks around her to kneel down next to me, Janet says, “I’m not sure what you’re plan is for feeding him, but do you want to try the breast?”

  I look up at David in silent conversation. I would love nothing more than to breastfeed James, but I know I will be leaving him for days at a time shortly.

  “Okay,” I answer, knowing I at least want to try. Maybe he can be one of these babies who has both breast and formula.

  With a lift of my free hand, I pull the strap of my dress down, along with my bra. My breast bounces free, and I notice David looking rather shy all of a sudden. I almost fall into a fit of giggles.

  “Here, let me help,” Janet says, positioning the baby’s head so he can latch on. The moment my nipple grazes his lips, he instinctively opens his mouth and starts sucking.

  “Wow,” I say, thinking it all feels really weird, but somehow satisfying at the same time. If the old Scarlet saw me doing this, she’d faint.

  “There,” Janet says, settling back in the chair. “You’re a natural.” She then bends down, taking out a pad from her bag. “I’ll be back tomorrow to check on James, but also I’ll get the birth certificate sorted.
Can you tell me the full name you want on the birth certificate?”

  I look up at David, smiling. “James Bernstein.”

  David beams. I knew he would love nothing more than to have his surname on James’ certificate.

  “No middle name?” Janet asks with her pen poised.

  Shit, I never even thought of that. I look up at David for answers. He bends down, kissing my hand. “I would suggest someone on your side of the family, but they are all …” He pauses for a moment like he’s trying to think of what to say. “Well, I personally don’t want any one of them anywhere near our son.”

  The way he says our son so possessively stirs things inside of me. I need to stop this. I’m becoming a pussy.

  “I’ve always liked the name Alexander.” And I do, but only because I have a crush on Alexander Skarsgard.

  David looks up in deep thought. He then smiles. “James Alexander Bernstein.” He looks down at me. “It’s perfect. I love it.”

  “You do?” He nods, causing me to look at Janet. “James Alexander Bernstein it is.”

  “Well, that was easy,” she says, jotting it down. “Sometimes parents take an age to even think of a first name, let alone a middle name.” She laughs like she’s remembering all the times it’s happened.

  Once she writes down what she needs to, she starts packing things away. “I’m going to leave you to some privacy. I’m sure you’re keen to be alone and bond with James. I’ll come by tomorrow morning at nine, if that’s okay? Until then, I will be a phone call away if you need me.”

  David rises. “Thank you, Janet. For everything.”

  She waves her hand dismissively. “Ah, it’s no sweat. It’s my job after all.” She looks down at me and then at James who’s still sucking away at my nipple. He’s nearly asleep. “Best job in the world,” she sighs. She then picks up all her bags. “Until tomorrow.”

  I nod. “Yes. See you at nine. And thanks.”

  She offers a big smile before David leads her out of the house. I hear when the door shuts and he’s back by my side.

  “Wow,” is all he says, but I couldn’t have put it more perfectly myself. “That was … unexpected.”

  I smirk. “Sorry I didn’t schedule the birth better around your time.”

  “Eh,” he responds, smirking. He then bends down and starts fussing around James. “How are you feeling?”

  “Tired,” I answer, honestly. “But also euphoric and emotional, and … I don’t know. I can’t put it into words.”

  Leaning forward, he kisses me on the lips before laying a kiss on James. “I know exactly how you feel. Now we have this tiny little person to look after. It kind of puts things into perspective.”

  I sigh. “It certainly does. I wasn’t ready to be a mother. Hell, I’m not sure I’m ready now. But I know I’ll give it my best shot.”

  “I have every faith in you,” David answers, stroking my hair. “One thing’s for certain and that is we will make sure this little one never goes without. He’s our son, and he will forever be our son.” He then smirks at something he’s just thought about. “Maybe one day I can convince you to have a daughter.” My eyes widen and he laughs. “I knew that would get a rise out of you.”

  “I’ve barely given birth, and already you have me knocked up again.”

  “Fuck, that makes my dick stiff. I love you being pregnant. And I’d also love nothing more than to come inside you so many times that you fall pregnant again.”

  “You’re such a caveman!” I complain, smirking.

  “You love it really. I’ll leave it for now, but just so you know, after a couple of years … once we’re settled in the States, I’ll be revisiting this conversation.” He looks down at my breast, groaning. “Maybe even before.”

  Biting my lip, I think about that and about everything that’s happened today.

  “She slept with my uncle too.”

  My head snaps up to his. “Please tell me you’re kidding?”

  He shakes his head. “According to my dad, she threatened to get him back by sleeping with every member of his family. He thought she was bluffing. He was wrong.”

  Shit. When my mum gets pissed, she doesn’t take her revenge halfway. Maybe I am my mother’s daughter after all. It makes me laugh.

  “What’s so funny?” David asks, frowning.

  “Nothing,” I answer, smiling up at him. “I don’t care about my mum right now. I’m too happy.” I look down at James sleeping peacefully at my breast.

  “Marry me.”

  My eyes snap to his, which are imploring me. I don’t know what to say. What can I say? I’m not marriage material? I’ll only end up breaking your heart? I don’t know if any of that’s true, but my past doesn’t exactly hold up much hope for my future.

  When I’m about to answer this, he says, “Look, I know you’re hesitant, and I know it’s because you feel unworthy, but by fuck, Scarlet, you’re not. I don’t know what’s going to happen in a few years, but all I do know is if we’re serious about raising James together and we are committed to that for the rest of our lives, then why shouldn’t we be committed to each other as well?”

  I bite my lip, thinking about what he’s just said. He’s right. Of course he’s right. If we are going to do something as serious as raising a baby, then why not get married?

  I don’t know what to think. All I do know is I’ve just had a baby. My heart, my head, and my emotions are all over the place. I’m trying to think logically, but it’s all a muddle.

  “Don’t worry about it now,” he finally says, smiling. “There’s no pressure. We’ll talk about it another time.” He gently sweeps the hair away from my eyes before landing his gaze on James. He smiles the most adoring smile as he grazes his finger along his cheek. All I do is watch in awe as he dotingly fusses over his son.

  And James is his son.

  It doesn’t matter that they don’t biologically match. That’s just genetics at the end of the day. Just by looking at him, I know he’s going to be the best dad a son could ever ask for.

  And it’s in that moment, staring at David, that it dawns on me. “Okay,” I sigh, watching David flit his eyes from James to me.

  “What?”

  I smile. “I’ll marry you.”

  Reid

  After my attack on Dr Mercy, the security guards immediately handed me over to the police. I have been sitting in the police station now for over an hour. No one has told me if I’m being charged, or what the fuck’s going on. I just know it’s been enough time to realise I made a monumental fuck up. In my moment of weakness, I was convinced Dr Mercy was Scarlet.

  I’m always fucking convincing myself it’s her!

  Shit! And now I’ve gone and fucked it all up. She’ll be traumatised and quite rightly won’t want to treat me anymore. Hell, maybe I should accept her offer and admit that I need medication. I know she’s not qualified to write prescriptions, but she said she knows someone who can. That’s if I let her help me.

  Maybe I’ll have little choice.

  The door opens, and I frown when I see who opens it. “Officer Fuck Face, what are you doing here? I thought you were Guardia Civil, not Old Bill.” I smirk. “Hey, that rhymes.” I’m still reeling over the fact he stole from me, but I’ll be damned if I let him see it.

  “I was here for another reason when I found out you were here,” he says, taking a seat opposite me.

  “So, to what do I owe this fantastic pleasure? Come to gloat about the money you stole?” I look at his wrist, noticing a brand new expensive-looking gold watch. “I see you’ve been spending it already.”

  He offers a knowing smirk, but doesn’t take the bait. Instead, he leans forward and places his hands on the table. “Are you fucking her?”

  I frown. “Who?”

  “Your therapist. I can understand why you’d want to. If I get my chance, I’ll fuck her pussy raw myself.”

  Snapping out of my chair, I grab him by his neck. “Don’t you fucking talk about her
like that.”

  He glares at me. “You better let me go, amigo, or I’ll break every fucking bone in your hand.”

  Reluctantly, I release my grip, slinking back into my chair. Officer Fuck Face’s glare turns into a smirk. “That’s better. I see she is your weakness.” When I don’t answer, he says, “So, are you fucking her?”

  “No.”

  He regards me for a moment before crossing his arms in front of him. He sucks in a breath. “If I had my way, you’d be locked up for what you’ve done, but for some unknown reason, she doesn’t want to press charges.”

  I snap my eyes up to look at him. “What?”

  I watch as he rises from his seat and pushes his chair forward. “She’s outside and has requested that she speak with you before you’re released. But I must warn you before I go. Lay one more hand on her and I will break every bone in your body. Got it?”

  I nod. That’s about the one and only thing he and I will agree on. I was wrong to do what I did, and I’ll say I’m wrong. She’s not Scarlet. If it had been her, she would have revelled in my touch. She would have revelled in my rough hands forcing my way over her.

  Fuck Face reaches the door, but before he opens, he turns to face me. “I’ll be watching you.” He winks, and then, soon after, he leaves. I know that was a veiled threat. Whether he means watching me now, or in general, I don’t know. I can hazard a guess at the latter.

  Within a few seconds, the door opens and in walks Dr Mercy. She looks timid and flushed like she’s uncomfortable.

  I made her that way.

  I have this desperate urge to get out of my seat and go to her, but I know that if I do it’ll frighten her. “I’m not going to touch you,” I say as a way of making her feel better.

  Man, I’m becoming a pussy.

  “I’m sorry for what I did to you. I really don’t know what came over me.”

  Sitting down in the seat opposite me, she nods. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea if I continue to treat you. I can recommend—”

  I lean forward, stopping her before she continues. “No, please. I don’t want anyone else. I want you.”